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agent1607307371

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Everything posted by agent1607307371

  1. Honestly, you will never feel that good again. You will always remember this. Fact is, her ex was probably already in her head. Did she leave him for you, or was she on the rebound. Do you really want someone who can be swayed so easily? Stick with the NC. You'll feel bad first, but you will feel better.
  2. Do you really just want to have sex with her, or do you see this as a way of becoming more involved with her.
  3. Imagine how terrible he'd make you feel if you stayed with him. What he calls selfish, I call a good decision to protect your own sanity. He has too many problems to be involved with someone.
  4. gixer - I have a friend who was massively promiscuous in her younger days and cheated on every boyfriend she had, and she held to the "can't help it, don't care" philosophy. But she's grown up, settled down and stopped getting so massively wasted at the weekends. I'd like to think if I was to cheat I'd at least own my behaviour, it's the biggest cop out ever.
  5. Is it an electric toothbrush? Also, yuck. I hope she rinses it well...
  6. Women are just as likely as men to cheat. Womem like sex and will go after it to whatever degree they find acceptable. To some, that is having another partner whilst in a relationship, to others it's a quick chain of successive partners, to others it's a mix of the mentioned at different speeds. And the whole "women made men monogamous" shtick - that is really about having the best provider. That doesn't necessarily equal the best genetic material.
  7. I don't think she's into you now she's had (well a bit of) you. Maybe she liked the chase, but now it's a possibility he interest has worn off. Maybe she's pulled away because she doesn't want to get attached to someone in a dangerous situation. I would pull back some, and see how she reacts. I bet she ups the flirting to pull you back in. Don't let her pull you back in.
  8. Simple answer: they aren't. Don't generalise. Frankly, as long as he has a job to pay his way and a talent for what he does, he should pursue his dream, it doesn't harm anyone. If he's putting his life on hold and chasing after something he has no talent for, he'd be better off taking her advise. That said, if she didn't like him as he is, why date him.
  9. That does not sound like a comfortable life to me. It sounds like a comfortable life for the people around you bought by sacrificing your soul.
  10. Check out Bondage 101 by jay Wiseman, it has material for people doing this for the first time, and information on techniques and safety or google search for ideas (link removed can look scary but has some interesting columns up). If he wants to be made to worship you then, make him kiss you up your body, make him tell you that he wants you. Make him be specific. Make him be very specific. Pretend you're a goddess and he's come to worship at your altar or you're an amazon queen and he has to do this to save his life. Find a fantasy and (try to) believe it. If he does something wrong take hold of his chin and move him away. You don't have to ask, he's yours to move. Like your keys or your cup. It can take some practice, but once you get in the headspace it gets easier. I had a bf who told me that he always knew when my domme headspace kicked in, because I just "became" it. Find out what you would like. I mean, if you're dominating him, it has to be about you also. ETA: Regarding frustrations. Try to keep it low level. Taking a frustration out on someone who is in a vulnerable position can be dangerous. Making him bark like a dog for not taking the trash out is one thing. Using it as a motivator if you're playing with a whip could get very nasty.
  11. Don't contact her. You ignore her and she'll ignore you and that's the best way for it to be right now. When she left she had already left. She was ready for you to ignore her. It gives her the advantage, but don't let it drive you crazy or into childish games.
  12. I hate love sometimes, but I love Neil Gaiman most of the time, he really has a way with words.
  13. Accusing a partner of cheating whilst cheating is a classic move. Don't give him a second chance, IMO he's just trying to butter you up to see what he can get out of you. He's proven himself to be untrustworthy once, and now he's being shifty in pursuing you. If he won't go after you openly, why? Don't go out with him for the person you think he can be. That is obviously not someone who exists. This guy doesn't want to change.
  14. Decado, how about sleeveless t-shirts with longsleeve cotton shirts over it?
  15. Misery does love company. You getting your stuff together is probably just highlighting to him all the bad things in his own life,making him feel pathetic. Just tell him that if he has nothing positive to say to you, to not say anything at all. When he can be civilised, you'll listen.
  16. Poking on the sides of the waist is a pretty common flirting tease, at least where I'm from it is. (UK) But anything more, YMMV I think...
  17. Has he done so since you have been together? It's possible that he has done experimenting and wants to settle down with you for good. It's also possible that he is bisexual and is just wired to be attracted to men, but again, that doesn't mean that he wants to be with one. You have to sit him down and have a talk about your concerns. It's not fair to drag it out, especially with a child in the mix.
  18. Work at feeling better towards yourself. Seriously. There will always be someone who (we think) is hotter, smarter, sexier, wealthier than us. You have to learn not to compare yourself with others, and just do the best you can do. Plus, envy can be a brutal friendship killer.
  19. I think she means more immediately that she does not want to continue a relationship with someone who does not know if he is bi, straight or gay. If is bi, would that make a difference? Would you not marry him if he was still attracted to men? How has his behaviour been towards you in the relationship? Do you suspect him of being unfaithful.
  20. I have long red hair, and when people I don't know play with it, it really puts me off them. I seem to attract men who have a really nasty habit of touching my hair as though it belongs to them. When I'm out I also have strange men run up to me to stroke my hair and run off again. It's all really creepy and irritating. If I don't know you, don't touch me. If we're flirting, stay within the accepted fly zones - hands, arm, waist. I love having my hair played with, or my scalp scratched, but frankly it's an action that comes after intimacy has been established, not one that establishes it.
  21. I know people who have had open-relationships (and are still involved in them) for whom it works very well. But I also know other people for whom it turned out very badly. It depends on the people involved and either the level of monogamy and commitment they are comfortable with or their communication skills. That said, if you get off with someone while you are in an open relationship, it's not cheating. If you break the rules, that's cheating, the rules are just different and often are more completely worked out than those of people who are in "normal" monogamous relationships. I was in one while at uni, and I liked the freedom (not that I used it much) and at the beginning it was great. However the other person involved gradually became more and more secretive about his activities (which was contrary to the rules we discussed (disclosure)) and the relationship ended badly. But honestly, I don't think that being open led to it. He would have cheated anyway due to his personality.
  22. I think that if you were in a relationship where you rejected and neglected your partner, and she breaks up with you, keeping in contact and trying to make her see what she's missing (being neglected and rejected) is just more of the same disrespectful behaviour. The only way your ex is going to look at you and want you back is if they're given time to heal, and they look at you and see you have really made changes to yourself (for yourself). Of course, they may never want you back, but the change will help in future relationships.
  23. Document everything he does to you. Everything. The go to the police. If he is harassing you in your home make a complaint, have a restraining order made and have him arrested if he breaks it. Does your boss have a boss? If this guy has had many complaints made against him and your boss is protecting him, go higher up. It doesn't sound to me like it can get any worse.
  24. It's possible that she is baiting you. Just do your best to ignore it and eventually she'll go away. In the meantime she'll just make herself look pathetic to your friends.
  25. What has brought you to the conclusion that he is harming?
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