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About Me

Mod Notes

  1. I decided to start this as a place to park my hodgepodge of thoughts and what's going on in my life. Had a great Easter yesterday- I had to drive a few hours to the airport to pick my son up from his trip to France and Spain. He had a great time and it seems like he grew up over night! It was so great to have both boys home and with me. Since I had them for Easter, I asked them what kind of meal they wanted and I went and bought the groceries for a nice Easter dinner. Then I get a text from my ex, saying his mom and dad are inviting me and the boys to Easter brunch at their house. Well I didn't really want to go because my ex and his gf would be there. But the boys wanted to go and they wanted me to come. So I told them I would drop them off, pop in to say hi to friends and ex's family, then pick them up later. It took a lot of courage. But Despite that, I actually had fun! My ex and his gf sat on the other side of the room, although at one point his gf complemented a necklace I was wearing. It was fun to catch up with people I essentially have not seen in 4 years since the breakup. Oh the things I do for my sons... Well afterwards I made that nice dinner and we had it by candle light- just before I had to take them to their dad's for the week.
  2. So I’m 30, my boyfriend is 35. We started dated in February last year, first guy I dated after having my son and the baby daddy leaving us. He loves my son so I’m very grateful for that! But I’m having some issues in the relationship and I’m not sure where else to turn… He will not have sex with me or even mess around… we dated until about June and all he had done was like feel me up under the clothes but there was nothing done besides that… I eventually asked him what was up cause he had said before when we started dating that he wanted to wait a little bit just so we could get to know each other more but it had been months, we knew each other… so his reason when I asked was that he still had feelings for his ex and he didn’t think it would be fair and we broke up. Fast forward a few months to December, we start seeing each other again cause he says he’s over her, things will be different now, etc. even got me a scratch off sex positions book and stuff for Valentine’s Day… well now April we still have not done anything sexual. I asked him about it a few weeks ago again and he said that he didn’t want things to be all about sex and wants to focus on the small things… he did start making out with me more and will randomly pinch my butt so I was thinking hey maybe he’s warming up. Last night we went to a comedy show and we had such a wonderful night and there was no mention of sex or anything but afterwards he sent me a text letting me know how much he loves me and WANTS to do stuff with me, he just wants to wait still…. And that really bummed me out and ruined the night a little bit for me honestly. I’m at my wits end… He’s such a good guy and he’s so nice to me and my son… I don’t know what to do. I have needs that are notttt being met.. satisfying myself isn’t enough.. we are also at the point where he wants me and my son to move in with him in a few months but I don’t want to if we haven’t had sex by then… what would you do in this situation?
  3. Ok I need help please me and my girlfriend have been going out for 2 almost 3 months and we are long distance we live in different states. But we ft every day and text alot. Bit the past 3 days she has been distant which I noticed so I told her I would give her some space and I did she texted me that night and that's how I was doing and then called me and told me that she was going out with a friend to the movies next week and the she said he implying it's a guy friend but there going alone to see the new Halloween movie. And I'm a bit suspicious because it a guy from her work and she just started this job a week ago but she has insured me that if she ever thinks of cheating on me she will break up with me but I have this gut feeling that there's something more but she has Alot of guy friends because she doesn't get along with girls but most of her guy friends are her ex's or guys she has "talked to " but she only been with 2 guys sexually and there not her friends. But idk if she's testing me or playing mind game or what but she seemed fine when she fell asleep on ft tonight but. I have told her I trust he 100% that I don't trust guys because I know how they think and they are very manipulative. But she doesn't believe me but we are in that 3 month like end of honey moon faze so I don't want to over step until she's comfortable because she's distinct so I don't want to tell her that I'm not comfortable with it. But I just need help I have pretty bad anxiety so I over think Alot I just need to ease my mind it 4 am plzzzz help
  4. So, in one of my previous posts, I expressed how my boyfriend (19M) gave me (19F) his chain to wear to keep him with me and stuff while we do long distance, and then I found out his ex wore his chain, too, which made me uncomfortable. So, I am going to give it back to him, but I kind of want something else to remember him by now since I'm no longer wearing his chain- I literally feel naked now without it... I never took it off and I legit fell asleep holding the cross in my hand... I'm trying to find a way to tell to him that I want him to get me something FOR ME, more personal you know? ... NOTHING BIG!!! I literally went on ebay and saw these $15 customizable necklaces *wink* *wink* Is it bad to ask for something straight up or is hinting the way to go? Especially since I want it to be sincere... should I just wait and see if he gets me something? :) thank ya!
  5. So, I (19F) started dating my boyfriend (19M) in January of this year. This is my first relationship and this is his third. He broke up with his most recent high school girlfriend due to distance and going in different directions for college, etc. (college stuff) in September 2020. Him and his girlfriend dated for a little over a year. I can’t stop thinking about his ex and I’m trying to stop. He’s even reassured me and I trust him, but it doesn’t help that they still kinda stay in contact and have the same friends lol :/. However, whenever I was stalking his Instagram (which I know we all have done before!), I noticed a picture where she was wearing his chain when they were dating. This made me uncomfortable because it made me feel like it was a hand-me-down and kind of not as special. I expressed this to him and told him I appreciated it, but it made me feel weird. Am I overreacting or is that completely rational and normal? I feel naked without it now and I liked having something to help me remind of him since we are now long distance for summer. Also, since i’m planning on giving it back to him when I go visit in a couple weeks (unless someone on here tells me i should keep it), I want to put a charm or something on it with my name on it to remind him of me, but again, the ex have him something to put on his chain when they were together... is that me just being silly? Please help!!!
  6. My girlfriend and I have been together now for a little over 2 years. I can honestly say we have only really argued like 3 times in the past 2 years. Lately her best friend broke up with her b/f whom she had dated for about the same length as us. Well her friend started talking about how much fun it is being single again and my g/f wants to take a brek because of this. This is not the first time either, she also has another friend that cannot do much more than mess around with guys that has also tried persuaying her to "take a break" from me. How can I convince my g/f that its not a great idea? Also she seems to have a problem not knowing if other guys find her attractive, why this matters, i dont know, but I tell her all the time she is beautiful.
  7. My gf loves to dance and she sees noithing wrong with dancing with other guys. i see evertyhng wrong with it, right now we are having problmes becuase she wants to dance and i cant handle it just cant, so i told her either u choose me or dancing, was that the right thing to do?
  8. My girlfriend have been together for quite a long time... this might strike some as conservative, but we'd rather enjoy eachother's company, than rush into things like most people these days. We started occasionally doing things together, which I guess was classified as "fooling around". We're both still young, (she's only 17, I'm 19)... and so we decided we should stop fooling around, because we want to treasure our time together as people, and to leave that stuff until we're actually ready to have sex (we both want to wait for a year or two more). Anyway, sometimes when we're alone together, and we hug and kiss, or make out... my body shakes. My arms shake. Most of my muscles just twitch or shake. This started happening after we started fooling around (not after we've stopped). I think my body sort of naturally wants to do those things, and it anticipates it so much, that sometimes I can't stop shaking. The first time it happened, I was also profusely sweating, and basically couldn't do anything, because the shaking was so bad. I tried to continue, and it made me feel really ill. We thought I had some kind of fever, because it lasted throughout the day lol. I really don't like it... my girlfriend doesn't mind, she just wonders if I'm alright sometimes lol. I've tried telling myself that it doesn't matter what we do, because I really don't want to do those things yet either... but my body still seems to. Is this natural? Have other guys experienced this, or girls for that matter? Even though we've stopped doing those things, it still happens. Is there any trick to stopping it?
  9. I have recently broken up with my girlfriend I now wake up and observe who I have become, and I don't like it. I'm quieter, more stuck up, less friendly, less interesting. I prefer the person I used to be. I feel like she has drained the life out of me... Anywayz... here I awake, this much more quiet person, less sociable, feeling pretty much dead and lonely. So how do I become again who I was, the louder and amusing entertainer? I've lost touch with many friends and those I have not lost touch with are mostly too busy. So how do I make new friends again, get that feeling of being completely free and return to that lovable, seducing and charming person I used to be, who always had too many parties to go to at once, a plan or three for the night and would be the person you would call when you wanted to have some fun? I want to love myself again... -
  10. Hello, I've been seeing a girl for 4 months now. Here's the story. I met her 10 months after my ex of 3 yrs broke up with me. My new gf is great, but I don't see myself being with her long term. About one month into seeing the new girl, my ex found out about it and told me she sees me with her in the future. My ex broke up with me because she said she wasnt ready for a committment yet and she wanted to do her own thing for awhile. She promised me she hasn't been dating anyone while we were apart and had no plans to. I still talk to my ex over email and bottom line is I plain miss her. I'm just not sure what to do with my current gf, she has been nothing but great to me the whole time she's known me, but I just don't feel I could be around her 24/7 in the future. I'm afraid of hurting her feelings too, she will be very crushed, i know it. I could keep the relationship going, but i'd only be cheating myself, and leading her on. Thank you all for reading any suggestions are welcome
  11. me and my girlfriend talk on the phone but i hate it when there is akward quietness... what should we talk about so we can talk for hours...
  12. Hey, Me an my girlfriend are really happy. I love pleasing her. We don't go that far because she doesn't want to, which is fine with me i respect that. So far she is All talk meaning she will say all this dirty stuff she want's to do and then not be up to it. On one occasion she told me she wanted to give me head, so of cource i agreed, and i asked if i could give her oral first, she also agreed. When it came time unbuttoning her pants her eyes turned into a sort of crying mode, no tears just red, i stopped what i was doing asked her if she was alrite continued questioning her and then she finally said she didnt wanna do it. Now she has done this in the past and it makes me feel like she doesn't trust me. When she does something like this my pride is hurt for a while and i feel like Shizzle . She gets me all worked up and then lets me down. The Shizzley feeling i try to cover it up but it just shows and i can't help it as much as i try... Another thing i should mention is she got the same way when were gonna make out at the mall but 3 visits later she did it without thought. I am very confused...is she just counting down on a clock...it feels like i am being messed with...am i???? What is the real problem here we have made out i've felt her up... she felt me up (reluctantly) and i have fingered her while her pants were on (yes my hands were actually inside her a load of times)(don't ask how) and that is it...what the heck is going on here
  13. Here are the facts: 1. Went out on a 1st date 3 weeks ago - both of us had a great time (he confirmed this and also reiterated this to me a few times) 2. Both of us have been busy - we're in different grad school programs and last week was midterms - and have been unable to really connect again (or at least very limited communication - short phone calls or emails) 3. I had an evening planned with my buddies for Fri nite and invited him - he accepted and seemed to be looking forward to hanging out 4. Evening comes...he's stuck finishing a paper (took longer than he expected)....but he was going to finish and meet us 5. We already finished the 1st part of our evening (8:30PM now) and moved the party to a 2nd location - I call to check in and let him know. He apologizes for being so late and will meet us at 2nd location - asks if he can bring his buddy (of couse, no problem) 6. 2nd location....it is now 9:30 and he is not yet there....he calls says that he is done with paper and buddy is picking him up..will be at the location by 10PM (again apologies) 7. 10PM - still there at location (hmm....I am annoyed) and no phone call - but of course by this time, I am irritated and will not be bothered to call 8. 11PM - party breaks up...still no sign, no phone call. Girlfriends all say don't bother calling him...he's rude to not have checked in by now...so I don't call....and am fully annoyed 9. 11:20 he calls...says he's at the location but doesn't see me...I proceed to tell him that we've left...was not a byatch about it...just very matter of fact. He seems now very sheepish and rather uncomfortable. Apologizes again...and again....tells me that this is really not how he wanted it to turn out...he really wanted to see me...but his buddy that went to pick him up was in bad shape and needed to talk......blah blah blah...sorry sorry sorry...I tell him that I understand that things come up...but I didn't appreciate that he kept me waiting the entire time and did not bother calling me - that was rude. Told him that he's got some major points to score back..... 2nd chance? Do I make peace offering? What to do?
  14. conversation within a group setting. This is what I have so far. (1) PERSONAL OPINIONS (2) OBSERVATIONS (3) COMPLIMENTING (4) SHARING INFORMATION (various subjects, including self) "You could actually get those spark plugs cheaper at Kragen, you know.." "Yeah, I think it's 20 dollars to get in, but I'll check the club's website. "I might go to Mammoth Lake, depending on the snow conditions." "Guys? Check this out.. I read this magazine, right, and it featured an interview about __________________" (5) STORY-TELLING "This party I went to was _______________" "On our break we saw this totally cute girl, but she smiled at Robert instead of me. This happened before, at the last conference we went to.." "I swerved the car to the left and managed to avoid colliding with the deer. My girlfriend freaked, though.." (6) OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS (that show interest in someone) When did you go to the ________________? Have you been to La Plebe's shows lately? How much mileage does it have? (7) LIGHT-BANTER WITH SOMEONE (work in progress) I would love to hear your suggestions! I realize that it is hard to classify and categorize things in life, but hopefully this well help. Thanks, SFboi415
  15. Hey everyone. I'm a 23 year old guy who just had his heart broken by his now ex-girlfriend after a one year relationship. She broke up with me two weeks ago. She is 21 and has been in a four year relationship, and then the one year with me. She recently broke up with me because she "really needs to be alone right now." She always told me how much she loved me, and she wanted to move in together. But all of a sudden she drops me like a bad habit. I told her I understood why she needs to be alone. But she is handling this much better than I am. I've been trying to leave her alone, but I did text her once yesterday telling her how much I miss her, and I hope things are going well for her. She replied to my text by simply saying "Hey, thanx for the text. I hope things are going good for u." Don't get me wrong. I'm not a smothering, obsessive boyfriend (honestly). I have several questions that I need answered. 1) Will she come back? What can I do to get her back? 2) Is the "I need to be alone" excuse just another way of saying I want to be with other guys? 3) What did I do that would cause her to drop me so suddenly? I'm not going to contact her anymore. But I was thinking about giving it a few months and then emailing her to meet me for dinner. Is this a good way to go? Can anyone relate to what I'm feeling/talking about? Any help /suggestionswould be greatly appreciated.
  16. My girlfriend has requested that tomorrow ive got to give her the best kiss in the world. Any tips to make it more interessting that just a plain kiss? Oh, while im posting: Im terrible at multitasking. Does it matter that i have to put all my effort into th kiss and cant do anything else? If so, how can i do stuff with my hands or whatever?
  17. ok im new to this site and me and my girlfriend are in a long distance relationship during the school year, for college. anyways i went to see her last weekend and i haven't gotten her to orgasm in a very long time. we don't have sex i usually finger her and give her oral. i've gotten some tips on what to do and i tried it on her and she said it felt alot better than last time, but i still can get her to orgasm. is it her? is it me? whats going on?
  18. my girlfriend is coming over this weekend and i want to do more than make out, i want to please her really bad. what are some things that i can do that she would like? should i give her oral cause i hear alot of girls like recieving oral. any places she would like to be touched or kissed?
  19. well once again I have a Big problem! I love this girl so much, but i think she pushin away from me. here's the scenerio: well I really don't hang with her since are lunch for school has changed but yeah since this happened she been blowin me off. last week she blew me off and said that next week we will be together. so the weeks comes and she says she can't go, good thing I had back up plans so I went 2 my Ex's Jam. then the next day I asked her wut she did last night she said that she went 2 her friends house. Now im really madd and I losin feelings for her. Is this a sign that she doesnt want me anymore or am i just jumping to conclusion??
  20. Ok this is going sound kinda odd, but hear me out. My gf lets me make all the decisions as to where we go to eat, or what we do when we go out. When I ask for some of her input, she says "Whatever you want is fine with me", or something along those lines. I know this seems like a man's fantasy, but I cant help but be worried. I know she loves me, but Im worried than eventually she will just get frustrated about me picking stuff that I want to do. I try to pick stuff for us to do that I think she would like, but she just tells me Im picking it for her and gets mad. I also dont her want to do the stuff I choose just because she wants to make me happy; I want us to do stuff together because we want to. Any advice? I tried talking to her about it, but she tells me she wants whatever I want.
  21. I have grown up to notice that there are a certain boundaries that needs to be drawn when the girl is with her boyfriend. I have no ulterior intent. But it happens everytime. I talk with the girl (boyfriend either sees it or that i'm talking with both of them), next time i meet with her, the boyfriend usually gives off signs of dislike or hog her 100% of the time, at times even arguments take place between them and i just silenced myself right there and then. I can honestly sense how the boyfriend is feeling, so usually i just back off from them when the boyfriend is emitting dislike or "guarding" the gf from "attacks". And then i imagine the boyfriend's perspective of not raising a weasel into his life. When boyfriend is with his gf, friendly gesture towards the guy talking to her would only create a path of potential threat. Well, perhaps the friendly guy doesn't have intent, but what happens if they ARE in fact, compatible. Worse yet, more compatible than the boyfriend. I have no questions, but does it remind you guys of some experiences, threats to freedom, or even resentment? Seeing things in different perspective tears my mind up, it seems so solutionless.
  22. any opinions would be great on this. ive been doing a lot of thinking,especially after my friend rejected me.there have been a lot of questions in my head......why do i want a girl so bad......what is the point.......why do i feel so sad.....why am my friends distant.....etc etc at first,i thought it was all my fault.this was natural,i was depressed after the rejection. now that i have a clearer head,im thinking that i need to improve myself to be worthy of a decent girl in my life. about why i need a girl,i guess its the loneliness factor.im a lone child,always played by myself when i was a kid.i have many friends,but i often find it difficult to get really close to people and to et people close to me because im so used to having my space.the only time i really felt close to someone was when i had a long distnce girlfriend,and we would talk loads about anything daily. anyway,i was thinking i should improve myself,concentrate on the matters i have rised as well as a few others and see where i go.please note,im not trying to improve myself with the aim of getting a partner,i guess improving myself will make me a more desirable person.its not my aim to improve myself to get a girlfriend. any thoughts?
  23. Alright, some of you may know my thing here and that I am in the midst of a blossoming relationship that could be really sweet. We seem to have a good deal in common as for what we like and are kinda interested in. Well that's how it was with my last bf, so it seemed to me. He didn't think so, he said it got boring, I wasn't interested in the same sophisticated, intellectual things he was interested in; like worshiping the almighty science world. The new guy asked me out for a thrid date on sunday day, and I was like "of course!" the thing is it's like "ok what do you want to do?" "Ummm, I don't know!" I mean the cities aren't boring! We saw a movie last saturday, I like going to see movies, I like going out to eat or to little places that make it easy to talk and stuff. I like to play board games and video games (which apparently makes me unappealing as a girlfriend says one guy...sorry I like video games I guess) I like hanging out and watching movies, I like being with mutual friends and doing stuff. (We have like, 1 mutual friend which is how we met) I don't want to be stuck in this "I'm boring" thing. I mean what I like to do seems kinda dull. But I really am not one of those extreme girls who likes to go out to loud clubs and bars and whatnot. Any suggestions here?
  24. my girlfriend told me that lately she has having female ejaculations, she said that she gets them all the time for no reason just when she is sitting there or something and she asked me why she gets them and i am not sure why. she said it might be because she used to masturbate but i dont think thats why. does anyone have any ideas why she has them all the time?
  25. my sis is leaving the house right now at 5:17 pm to go rollerblading with friends and guess what dad is making such a big fuss over it, yeah and it is a sunny day too. i soo disagree with my dad my sis is 20 yrs old i am 23. my dad wants my sis to stay at at home all day for some reason -hates her to leave the house for some odd reason. even if we leave the house he makes a big fuss- this is the summer times too-not school days where on sat and sun we have to stay at home all day too . yea lol this is the truth. don't laugh . we are asian too-chinese if it means anything lol. parents are just so damn strict. the don';t like her to leave the house same with me and i am a guy too. the thing they think is that going outside-life is tough -parnoid of how rapes of women, ppl gettin beat up guys and gals-swarmings, dad just said don't leave the house-"your just asking for trouble". -meaning some ppl might want to fight with u, gangs..... well bad stuff u hear from the media and news of young ppl. well till i move out its going be like this , maybe that why i don;t want to tell my gf or date that i have a certain time table-parents are just so damn strict of leaving the house. if i do maybe i can only see her in the afternoon only. evenings and nights are out of the questions
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