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  1. So I’m 30, my boyfriend is 35. We started dated in February last year, first guy I dated after having my son and the baby daddy leaving us. He loves my son so I’m very grateful for that! But I’m having some issues in the relationship and I’m not sure where else to turn… He will not have sex with me or even mess around… we dated until about June and all he had done was like feel me up under the clothes but there was nothing done besides that… I eventually asked him what was up cause he had said before when we started dating that he wanted to wait a little bit just so we could get to know each other more but it had been months, we knew each other… so his reason when I asked was that he still had feelings for his ex and he didn’t think it would be fair and we broke up. Fast forward a few months to December, we start seeing each other again cause he says he’s over her, things will be different now, etc. even got me a scratch off sex positions book and stuff for Valentine’s Day… well now April we still have not done anything sexual. I asked him about it a few weeks ago again and he said that he didn’t want things to be all about sex and wants to focus on the small things… he did start making out with me more and will randomly pinch my butt so I was thinking hey maybe he’s warming up. Last night we went to a comedy show and we had such a wonderful night and there was no mention of sex or anything but afterwards he sent me a text letting me know how much he loves me and WANTS to do stuff with me, he just wants to wait still…. And that really bummed me out and ruined the night a little bit for me honestly. I’m at my wits end… He’s such a good guy and he’s so nice to me and my son… I don’t know what to do. I have needs that are notttt being met.. satisfying myself isn’t enough.. we are also at the point where he wants me and my son to move in with him in a few months but I don’t want to if we haven’t had sex by then… what would you do in this situation?
  2. In my opinion...online. If you have met the girl in person and one day she wakes up and says to herself, "Gee, I am going to break up with my boyfriend." and then she does it, it is a rather sickening and horrific way of getting rid of you. Sadly in some cases there isn't a choice. This has happened to me nearly a year ago but I know friends both male and female who are victim to this. I think the worst thing is it seems easy for them. They do not see the pain in your eyes when you are told the news. They cannot see your facial expression to see how much it affected you. They cannot see the torture you have just endured for that second you read that note. They cannot see how all of your hopes and dreams have been wiped off the face of the earth and so has all of your efforts of being with that person. It is a horrible way to die and trust me, I feel for you guys out there because I been there and I would rather be lonely for good than to even imagine what the dumper is thinking in their mind. It appears so horrible for the fact that this person APPEARS to have put no effort into getting rid of you. I seen chickens receieve a better ending than that. So what ways do you think are horrible ways to go out? Let's hear some experiences and get the loads of crab dung off our chests.
  3. i was going through a rough time yesterday and i needed someone to talk to and i tried to talk to my bf about whats going on. he was very distant during this conversation. i asked him if he cared at all and he said he does care. i asked him if he cares then why doesnt he ever ask if im okay or whats going on with my home life. he said he does want to know, but he doesnt ask because hes afraid its not going well. i said "so youd rather just not know if im ok or not?" and he said again that he does want to know but he doesnt ask because hes 'worried'. i said he just doesnt like hearing about it, and he agreed and his excuse was "yeah im kind of an empath". this really upset me and i told him he doesnt need to worry anymore because im never gonna talk to him about my life anymore anyway. i just think if he really loved me and cared about me he would try to make sure im okay? idk. am i wrong here? am i expecting too much from him??
  4. Hello, I have been dating a guy (28 years old) for 3 months, he asked me to be his gf recently. He is treating me very well but he constantly follows new naked insta models. These girls are people that he cant meet obviously but the problem is I find the fact that he is following and constantly seeking out naked woman very disrespectful. Also, the fact that he told me he will only have eyes for me and I will see with time that I can trust him, but despite saying these, him following these accounts doesnt look good to me at all. I am conflicted. On one side: - I know that guys and girls can look at other people and find otehrs attractive while in relationship too. I follows celebrities and footballers that I find attractive. But I wouldnt follow D... pictures on social media especially when I was in a relationship. It would be disrespectful to my bf and I am sure he would be worried if he saw my social media activity following bunch of accounts with d... pics. I find him following naked insta models on insta totally disrespectful. And He appears as a thirsty guy in my eyes now, who is constantly seeking out naked woman (but again I dont know if this is normal for men). - Indeed, before meeting him i've always wondered how my friends or other girls put up with such disrespectful treatment. I always told myself I would never be with someone who disrespects me like that. (Plz correct me if I am being so harsh). - So, since it has been only 3 months, I am considering to end the relationship by saying something like "we are not compatible" and continue dating and choose to be with someone who wont do that. Because I think that if I try to talk to him about his social media activity, I might appear as a controling person. Also, I dont want to tell him what to do. If he is happy following these women, he should. I shouldnt be preventing him. It shouldnt be a forced decison, it should come naturally from him. Perhaps he is not done exploring? On the other hand: - I am thinking about keeping it very simple and telling him: "I know its normal for both man and woman to look at other man and woman and find others attractive but following these accounts and constantly seeking out naked woman is disrespectful." I will also tell him that I always told myself I would never put up with such activity in a relationship and see what he will say and take it from there. -- I dont know which option is better. I feel that this relationship has a potential if we could get past the insta issue. Also, the reason why I posted here is, I want to get more opinions. Perhaps, I am overreacting and being overly jealous? Perhaps I should change the way I think about the whole thing? For instance, some people might say he is a men and men are visual, so if he is loving and caring and making me feel beautiful, loved etc, I shouldnt worry about social media. But on the other hand, his social media activity is not making me feel respected. Also is it really healthy to lust over others when in a relationship with someone you claim you care about? I would appreciate your opinions, what should I do?
  5. This is a bit of a story, but any advice or input would help me so much. my boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years, and in the beginning me and his sister got along fine. We weren’t super close but got along good. After about 6 months (summer) she wanted to go to the beach and do things with me, and I was super excited cuz all my past relationships have been toxic and I was excited to finally have an in law. I started a new job and wasn’t available as much, and one day she just stopped asking me to hang out. after a couple of months of only seeing her around the property, we ended up going to a local bar with other friends. When we were alone; she told me when my bf and I first met on a dating app, that he was stuck between me and another girl and only Chose me because the other girl changed her mind. Of course I immediately called my boyfriend and as soon as I dialed, her back peddling began. My bf told the truth. He was talking to a girl with that name, a year before we Met, and they only spoke a couple of Times. The situation was let go because she was drunk and denied malicious intent. 6 months later I was spending the night at my boyfriends house, we would have beeN together for a year and a half at this point. I open the drawer ive been using since the beginning of our relationship, to find underwear that doesn’t belong to me. I’m shock, all I said was these aren’t mine and left the room. My boyfriend gets up, and walks out the door. I didn’t know what was going on. When he gets back his mom is with him, and he’s clearly upset/sad/angry, and asks her if he was over to his house (neighbours) and accidentally put them there. She said no but confirmed that they were 100% his sister cuz she saw them in the wash recently. She has no idea how they made it next door, into my drawer. And of course, the sister denies it. ove this past summer I got her a job with me, since the pandemic work has been tough, and even after everything she put me through, when she asked if I could get her an interview I did. After she got the job she repaid me by talking ill of my to my coworkers (one being my cousin) and telling me the bosses were saying I was too slow at the job and I was the worst employee. She only did it to turn my self esteem. iF you’ve made it this far, im So sorry for the length. So much has happened. This last part is the most recent tho. one night she came over and was just hanging out when she asked my bf if she could spend the night on the couch. No big deal. Before anyone could say anything in response she said “if you guys wanna *** it’s okay I don’t mind listening”. as someone with siblings this completely mind blew me and my bf. He just said no. And to go back to their parents. My boyfriend found it weird and says he spoke to her and she just wasn’t thinking before she spoke. he has since kinda just pushed it aside and forgot about it, but it still sits weird with me. When we’re at family meals i sometimes see her licking her fingers and staring at him, idk if it’s supposed to be a childish joke or something a little darker. She has no boundaries. We plan to move in together within the next couple of years. And I’m scared of what’s going to happen. My boyfriend says there will be boundaries and he won’t let me be uncomfortable especially in my own home, but I feel guilty since the family is so close knit and as of now if she wants to come over she can just barge in. And scared of her reaction when those boundaries are put in place and she can’t just invade whenever she wants. thanks for reading. I’m just wondering what other people would do if they were me, or my advice on maybe what her deal is. Cuz my mind as been over ever scenario, and i mean every single one.
  6. I have been in a relationship with the most wonderful man for the past 6 months. When I met him he had been separated from his ex for about 18 months. Neither of us were expecting it but when we met we just clicked from the start and decided to go with it. We’ve always been very open with each other. I was aware that it wasn’t long since his ex left him and always wanted to be sure that he was ready for something new so we have always talked about it. He asked me to be his girlfriend after a couple of months and our relationship has been incredible. We have met each other’s families, spent weekends away together and our relationship has been progressing well. He treats me really well, my friends think he is great and we are very well suited. He is also an incredibly loyal, genuine and nice person (in massive contrast to what I’ve been used to before!!). However, it seems he’s been having a bit of a wobble recently. He’s about to start a brand new job/career and he says that meeting me has urged him to sort his life out in that respect. He says that his life is a bit of a mess at the moment. I’ve also noticed that he’s been holding back a bit more whereas before he has always worn his heart on his sleeve. We had a long talk about it a couple of nights ago and he explained that although he is over his ex, he’s not yet fully over the hurt that the break up caused (she left him). And whilst he cares about me very deeply and even loves me, he has also been reflecting on why he has been more distant recently. He says that when he met me he had spent a lot of time healing and was just ready to start really enjoying being single but then I came along and he wasn’t expecting it or looking for it. Our relationship is very different to the one he had with his ex as he says he basically lived a single life alongside her. Whilst we are both very independent people, we enjoy spending time together which, in hindsight, maybe means the relationship has progressed quite quickly. He confided in a friend recently about how he was feeling, who asked him if maybe it was too soon and I think he’s been reflecting on this. It came as a bit of a shock to be honest as he’s always been so open with me I was surprised to realise that he had been feeling like this. I’ve asked him whether he wants to carry on and he says he absolutely does. That he is fully committed to this and wants us to continue enjoying getting to know each other and building on what we have. He says he doesn’t want to wreck the possibility of being with somebody who could be ‘the one’ just because he’s at a weird time in his life, and that he just wanted to be completely open with me. But at the same time he’s been worried that recently I’ve overtaken him with where we are in our relationship and that although he does see a future with me, he just wants to concentrate on the present for now. The funny thing is, since talking about it he has actually become more affectionate again. We saw each other again last night and I asked how he was. He said that since being completely open with me about everything, he actually feels closer to me and feels good about everything going forward but is worried that he may have pushed me away. I’m currently going through the motions of reflecting on all of this. It has made me worry...what if it is too soon for him?! Everything he has done has shown me that he very much cares for me and I really don’t want us to give up on this. But at the same time, I also don’t want to get hurt if he suddenly realises that he’s not ready. My gut is telling me to just slow it down and take it at his pace. But if I’m being honest it has made me feel more emotionally insecure around him. I have been hurt before and I don’t want to be in that position again. I guess I’m just trying to work out the best way forward so thoughts and comments would be appreciated. Sorry for the long post and thank you to anyone who had read this far!
  7. i'm almost shaking too much to ... to type this.. i don't .. want to die.. but it's killing me to live like this.. i ... i can't live without my mikey. i can't live with everybody.. hating me... because i can't do any thing. i can't be with them, i can't be without them.. i can't even cut myself right now.. this knife's too dull... and i.. i don't want to.. but i dont' know what else to do.. please.. tell.. me .. what to do.. i'm sorry... i've... calmed down some now.. whew..... ok.... but when you're rocking back and forth, whispering to no one in particular, "dream with me baby" and begging, ..... you know there's something wrong with your head. heh. as for my m... heh. as for that guy. he... i supposedly spoiled his plans for seeing me, because my parents are butt holes, and won't let me see anyone from anywhere. that and this part i didn't tell him, i can't see him yet because i haven't had that ... weird.. "sexual reassignment" crap done yet. so... yeah. he got mad, because i can't go visiting him and whatever, i spoiled his plans. me. my fault. i'm trying to ... fix my body, i'm bleeding for him (yes, i'm a cutter, i'm not going to say it any prettier.) i'm crying for him, i'm doing everything i can to speed up the whole change process, and... he... frack. i'm just... blown away. he's mad at me. the only one i've ever loved so hard, so... much. and he just.. walks away. just tosses it away. for what? nothing. i'm sure he's just as hurt, but he doesn't understand ...why. i'm just.. at a loss as to where to go from here. i was living day to day based on him. when i'd see him next, what i'd do, where i'd go.. what i'd do after high school... i changed my entire life plan around just for him. i suppose this is heard here often, but i'm not used to it. i've only had one other bf before (both online.. yeah, real stable.) and.. he just left one day and never came back. so... that was a kick in the pants, let me tell you this. i just.. don't know what to do. i honestly felt like dying. still do, but with much MUCH more sarcasm. man... i just need some help with.... how to... deal with this garbage. and i dont' mean "breakup advice" because that's not where i want this to go.
  8. My bf gets jealous very easily and dislikes the fact that i have one gf and all the rest are guys. I don't like girls... i don't like how they are two faced and the conversation topics that they have. I LOVE my bestfriend with all my heart though she's great. However he really hates the fact that I'm still good friends with ALL my ex bf's as well and that I still hang out with them. 2 nights ago i called him and he asked me wat i was gunna do all day. i said well i might be going to brians to help him clean up his house that got trashed after the kegger. he got upset, so i told him i wouldn't go. Then on msn brian's name was thanks so much Phil And Sara u guys rock! he got REALLY upset (he was at his friends at the time) and discussed it with his friends. Hes like so wat did u do yesterday... i said nothing i stayed home. He said you're lyin to me now i saw ur name in his msn name. I was like yah it said Phil and Sara.... I have an H in my name. I think he believed me but his friends didn't quite. And I was telling the truth. Ne wayz it wasn't that big of a deal... but I still want to be able to hang out with my ex's and have my bf realize that i love him and that they're just old flames that won't reignite themselves. How can i reassure him?
  9. Hey I've been goin out wit my boyfriend for just over a year now and im a bit worried that things r starting to change between us. At the beginning of our relationship, everyday we spent together id come home smiling and we'd always txt each other about wot a great time we had. Now when we go out together we still hav a gud time and that, but hardly ever say how we feel about each other. I mean I still really love him Im just worried all the excitement in our relationship has gone already. He hardly ever tell me he loves me or complements me anymore , and I don't think he misses me as much wen I go to university as he used to (im at university 2hrs away from home but see him most weekend) I sometimes worry he maybe starting to loose interest. This is my first long term relationship so I don't kno if they always go this way. Just wondering if anyone could give me advice plz
  10. hello again. in case you dont know my story already, i am a 20yr old guy who broke up with my boyfriend about 6 months ago. i have had the hardest time getting over him. i know he is not good for me for the mere fact that he was seeing someone for 3 months behind my back and when i approached him about it he replyed by saying "yeah, people change, Ive changed". I could have killed myself then and there. i honestly thought that i was going to be one of the lucky ones and had met my soul mate. i loved him with every hair on my body. It has been a rollercoaster of emotions since we broke up and im obviously still not over him. i have my good days and i have my bad (more bad then good). Anyways, i am posting this because he called me today to see "whats up" with me and how im doing. i didnt say much on the phone because i was holding back tears and didnt want him to know that i am still "stuck" on him. He told me that he introduced his new boyfriend to his mother and they get along really well. Do you think that rebound relationships work out?? i mean he has already moved in with this guy and have started a new life. i personally dont think its going to work out but maybe thats just hope on my part. i guess another big delema is that im upset that he has found some and im still alone. i know that sounds stupid but thats how i feel. the point i am trying to make is that i dont know how to tell him that i dont want to talk to him anymore. i know alot of people talk to their ex's but after the crap he put me through i cant bring myself to wanting to be friends with him. i dont want to be mean about it but at the same time i cant keep hearing from him if im going to get over him. it kills me to hear his voice and hurts even more to see his face. maybe he is contacting me because he hasnt totally let go of me yet?? i dont know. what do you think i should do or say to him?
  11. What do you when you call your boyfriend and he doesn't want to talk to you, and he's acting like a jerk?
  12. I lost my job in November. Ive been really bummed about being unemployed and my boyfriend has been supportive emotionally but pretty cheap and unwilling to go ahead and purchase anything for us to do without making me feel kind of guilty. There are things I want to do (concerts, sporting events, things like that). And while he gets a lot of gifted tickets from his season pass holder aunt and uncle he always takes his son. A male friend of mine asked me to go to a NBA game and Ive always wanted to go. My boyfriend doesnt like me to even mention this guys name (we've were friends long before he and I started dating). Because I conveyed to him a joke that this friend stated regarding he and I getting together. My boyfriend's not perfect but I love him and he is my best friend right now. I just want to go to the stupid game and lay off some stress but I dont want this to be a bad thing for our relationship. Either way things could get kind of silly. Should I just go and skate around the truth?
  13. After 10 years of marriage, we split. We had an agruement over my daughter's boyfriend using the computer. Things got out of hand my husband pushed my daughter, I slapped him, her boyfriend told him to stop pushing the women, my husband pushed me, my daughter's boyfriend tackled him, my husband tried to get a knife, and I ran out with the kids and stayed in a hotel with them for 2 days before returning to the house. After this, my husband says that sooner or later he would move in with a women because life is to hard living by yourself. It turns out that he cann't rent an efficiency b/c he doesn't have the money to do so, and he told me he is renting with a guy and his sister, after much fighting I get him to admit that he was seeing this women for appx 4 months now. He said they started hot and heavy, she ended the relationship b/c he was married, and he said he kept calling her. Although I want to believe what he says, I know I cann't and I know he is lying. He said he finds peace in that house and that there is no fighting. He says he loves me but is afraid to move back in to have the fight begin again, to have me mistrust him and then have to move back out. He comes to the house to see my other daughter and some of the times he hugs me and keeps saying that this relationship he has is not going to last. The last time he was over, he was hugging and kissing me and if I didn't stop it, it would of progressed to much worse. He says that he didn't feel that I loved him or cared for him, and that we hardly had sex any more. This is true, but I have found a note in his pockets w/a women's phone on it before. I always felt he was out there looking for someone. One time he was arrested for soliciting oral sex from a prostitute. He would treat me badly and tell me I was fat, ugly and old. I did let my daughter sleep in the bed with me, I guess I needed comfort that I wasn't getting from him. I did ask him to help me wean her from the habit, but he didn't. I got fat, I continued to smoke although I knew it was a turnoff for him. I am trying to make sense of this situation, and outsider who can look in and tell me their thoughts on the situation. I am feeling responsible for the breakup, I am feeling no self-esteem, and I am hurt and cann't think straight. Someone please write to me.
  14. I have kind of a strange question for you guys... but let me give you a little history first. I have been dating my boyfriend for a while now and we just starting making love. We knew it would happen when the time was right and so, when the time came, we were more than ecstatic. It wasn't until about an hour later when I started questioning myself as to whether the performance was good enough or if he even thought about me as we engaged in this. My mind started going nuts about whether he compared me to his past girlfriend and whether she was better than me, blah blah blah. It's been driving me nuts so my question to you is how are some ways that you might keep the past of your significant other as the past? I guess one of the reasons I continue to question such things is because when I was with my ex, I had asked him if he ever thought about another chick when he was making love to me and he said "yes" and from that point on, I cannot get that out of my head. I know that each person is different but if you have ANY suggestions on how I can just be happy with who I am and who I am with, please PLEASE let me know. I love my boyfriend too much to let this be a factor that may eventually cause conflicts in our communication or ultimately tear us apart. Thanks to all!
  15. my bf is from another country, hates his job and is homesick im 30 and hes 26, we've been living together for a year the other day he asked me where i see the relationship going i said i was happy with everything, he said he feels a bit trapped as he never gets time to himself i have compromised and started going out a couple times a week to give him a bit of time in the flat alone as he never got any before as i was always there he hasn't said much since then, that was a couple weeks ago i feel a bit funny, always wondering how he's feeling about me how do i find out if hes happier, he doesn't really like 'talking' but i feel uncomfortable about how things are at the moment
  16. does anyone here think that being in love means you want to spend the rest of your life together? personaly i think being in love doesnt necessarily mean that u want to spend the rest of your life together but more that ur open to that possibility and that ur happy to just be with them n being in love is more so just a feeling, a feeling that u really care and adore them etc. u see my boyfriend says that being in love or sayin that ur in love means that u want to spend the rest of your life together. cant you be in love but not necessarily say your goin to spend the rest of yoru life toegther? alsso if your not ready to fall in love do u think u can stop urself from fallin in love?
  17. Hey people.... Em... i think i have a really bad problem with jealousy. It's just my bf talks to alot of girls and i know he's in contact with his ex's eventhough he tells me he's not.... and i don't know why i just feel paranoid and jealous. Well i'm not sure if it's more paranoia than jealousy... just when things got bad and i took him back as my bf... he emailed his ex like straight away and told her... like.. as if its any of her business! i just dont understand it
  18. Hi! I'm 22 years old. I have a boyfriend who is 24, thoughtful, sweet, and really cute. He's not a real jealous guy and he doesn't smother me. BUT he constantly tells me that I look or seem unhappy, and I have trouble communicating feelings. It's because of these reasons he is unhappy. He also says that I belittle and make fun of the things he likes too much. My last boyfriend told me these things too. Our chemistry is off and on. We tell eachother we love eachother all the time. I have been with him for a little over a year, and before him I had a 4 year relationship. I'm not making him happy, and it makes me think if I really should be in this relationship. I've started emailing this guy I think is attractive and in a band. But I'm pretty sure this band guy will not treat me as well as my boyfriend does. What is a good or less hurtful way of breaking up with him? How can I approach this? I'm so confused! I wanted to move in with my boyfriend eventually, but now I'm not so sure. Thanx for the help.
  19. Lastnight I got really upset and I need advice, comfort and suggestions regarding my situation. First some background...my bf broke his leg about four weeks ago. He's very athletic and usually is always moving and full of energy. He had surgery about three weeks ago and ever since has been stuck at home most of the time bored out of his mind with not much to do. At first I started to realize he was cranky more often and not very cheerful like he usually is. It's lately and especially yesterday that are really starting to concern and hurt me. I went to his place yesterday evening and he wasn't overly affectionate. Didn't think too much of it but by that night everything just went downhill. He didn't want me near him (he's not in pain anymore but depressed) at night, told me he doesn't feel like having sex anymore, doesn't want me close to him, and was all around totally aloof with me. I asked him why he never tells me he loves me anymore and he said, "Why should I say it if I don't feel it." That was the most HURTFUL thing that came out by that point and I unfortunately began to cry. I don't know what to do! I feel like I'm not even dating him. He has no desire to call me anymore, and said he doesn't even really care if I come over not. I feel SO rejected all the while he tells me that I'm making too big a deal over this, that it's because he's focused on his leg and that I'm not his number one priority right now-his injury is. I could understand if it was because he's in a lot of pain but he isn't-just depressed from having no motivation after being stuck at home for the last month. If someone could please tell me what to do with this situation and how I can best handle it PLEASE let me know-my heart feel so heavy right now.
  20. My boyfriend and I have been dating approx. 4 months. We've gotten really close and spend a lot of time together. Last night I commented on that by saying "A lot of my friends think it's strange that we spend so much time together. They think we'll get sick of each other." He said "Yea, my friends think I'm whipped." I completely could not understand this "whipped" comment. I said "Whipped?! I've never stopped you from doing something that you've wanted to do." and he said that I was right but segwayed into saying that this summer he was going to be playing golf every Saturday. EVERY Saturday. I've spent almost every summer single and alone. And now I have someone and he's not going to be around EVERY Saturday? I don't think I can deal with that. Is it me? Isn't that a bit EXCESSIVE? What would you do in this case??
  21. I have grown up to notice that there are a certain boundaries that needs to be drawn when the girl is with her boyfriend. I have no ulterior intent. But it happens everytime. I talk with the girl (boyfriend either sees it or that i'm talking with both of them), next time i meet with her, the boyfriend usually gives off signs of dislike or hog her 100% of the time, at times even arguments take place between them and i just silenced myself right there and then. I can honestly sense how the boyfriend is feeling, so usually i just back off from them when the boyfriend is emitting dislike or "guarding" the gf from "attacks". And then i imagine the boyfriend's perspective of not raising a weasel into his life. When boyfriend is with his gf, friendly gesture towards the guy talking to her would only create a path of potential threat. Well, perhaps the friendly guy doesn't have intent, but what happens if they ARE in fact, compatible. Worse yet, more compatible than the boyfriend. I have no questions, but does it remind you guys of some experiences, threats to freedom, or even resentment? Seeing things in different perspective tears my mind up, it seems so solutionless.
  22. Long post, but I would really appreciate some advice because I am hurting badly right now. I have been going out with my girlfriend for about 11 months. I met her at the beginning of my freshman year at college. She was my first with everything. I was never with a girl before. I didn't expect my first relationshup to be so intense, but we connected SO well. Emotionally we moved very fast, but we didn't do much more than make out for the first 2-3 months because she was still not totally over her old boyfriend and they hadn't really broken up yet, although they went to different schools and had agreed to see different people. After she broke it off completely with her old boyfriend, we really became close. We became inseperable. We were both in love and if you asked anyone who knew us, they would probably assume we would eventually get married. The year finally came to a close and now i would have to leave her for 3 months during the summer because I live in a different state. During that year, we basically couldn't live without each other. We weren't complete without each other. The first time she mentioned a break was almost a couple of months before the school year ended. It was with the intent of getting back together, but she just felt we smothered each other too much and that we needed other things to occupy our time. We didn't really follow through with the break because we had fallen into this cycle of being so dependent on one another. Over the summer, we talked all the time on the phone and it wasn't until about a month ago that her frequent calls stopped. I also noticed that she wouldn't say I love you unless I said it first and that she just didn't seem as excited to talk to me. This all started about 2-3 weeks before I came out to visit her. When I came out to visit, I thought everything would fall back into place. It seemed to be that way the fist day or two, but then I could tell she still wasn't the same. She wouldn't kiss or hug me unless I did it first. Finally, 3 days before I left to go back home, I asked what was going on. She said she needed a break. That she felt bruned out and needed her own space and did not want a boyfriend right now. I was deeply hurt because it seemed like her feelings for me had changed so drastically and quickly. I can understand her feelings, but she also said not to count on getting back together which I don't understand. I asked her if this was really just a breakup and the end of it, but she said that she knows she wants no boyfriend right now and may or may not want to be with me in the future and needs time to see how she feels. She also said another boyfriend is the last thing she wants right now, so it's not like she wants to date other guys. Since I got back from visiting her, I have called her once and she has called me once in a week. I am trying to respect her wishes of a break and stop a lot of the contact I had with her. She said she doesn't want it to be like we can't talk just because we're on this "break." I am really afraid of losing her and I don't want that because I really believe we have something special. Also, next year we will be in the same dorm and she live in the floor above me. Also, we have a class together and my two best friends which will be my roommates are also her two best friends! So obviously we will see each other a lot still. She also says that she will always love me and I will always be her best friend, but she has lost some of the romantic feelings for me. So she is not IN love with me I guess. Right now, it really seems like she doesn't want to get back together although she doesn't want to totally close the door yet. I really want to get her back. I am still in love with her and she's all I have right now. I am so confused and don't understand why this happened. We had so many good times together and only got into silly fights sometimes over dumb things. How is she just able to get on like this without me? I have given her my whole heart and treat her with love and respect. We are alike in so many ways and I feel she is the only one who has really understands me. I see her again in two weeks for the start of the next school year.
  23. I dont know why but my bf is all of a sudden being more loving. Hes always hugging me and sitting by me and stuff. We have been togeather for a long time and have been living togeather for a year and a half so its not like we never see each other in fact we sometimes get sick of each other. Well all of a sudden hes allover me like flies on well you know. He wants to have sex all the time too. I think it might be because Im gone alot now. I have just started my fall semseter of school and I never get home till 7pm on most days. But could there be anything else? And I dont mean like is he cheating on me because I know hes not. But there has to be something or maybe Im just thinking to much about this.
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