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About Me

  1. Do you have book passages, quotes, poems that left their mark on you, speak to you, do you perhaps even use them as a mantra or orientation in life? Perhaps you just..like them? Well, I have tons and tons and I never seem to get enough and have the same curiosity drive me in the inquiry about yours as some women have for "what's in your handbag" pins. It's an obsession of mine almost. If you have bits of literature you'd like to share I bet some of us bookworms would love to read them. If possible, try to add the authors name or a book title for those who might be interested in reading mor
  2. I want to chronicle my journey, post-breakup so that hopefully ENAers current and in the future can use my story as a point of reference. I'll do my best to post here each day with how I'm feeling, doing, interactions, etc. My story? Senior in college. Mutually broke up with my girlfriend of 2.5 years six weeks ago. Neither of us were happy in the relationship anymore. We basically spent most of our free time together and over-time, that led to a toxic dynamic. We neglected our friends to be together. We just agreed that we loved and cared about each other and didn't want to totally ruin
  3. Hi everyone, I need help with my current situation in life. I need to change my personal life. I love my family very much but I’m feeling held back and it’s stifling. I would like to start learning web development to work on a new platform idea. My problem is I live at home and I’m already 51 years old. I don’t have savings but will find a way to pay for the classes. I don’t even know where to begin explaining. I have many questions but most importantly is do you think it’s too late to start over at my age? I don’t feel confident but I will start over somehow. Please ask m
  4. Hello everyone I hope you're doing well, I'm currently a month into a breakup with a man who used to talk about our future and wanted to marry me. We met in high school and dated on and off up to college. The breakups before were initiated by me--most being from my insecurities and depression; the usual "he can do better than me". The last breakup I initiated I had felt unhappy in the relationship and broke up with him and dated a mutual friend of ours for one day before I didn't feel right. Within the week I had gone back to check up on him and he was doing awful. He was having self-i
  5. So I've found out that my boyfriend watches porn and it made me feel really upset and angry and hurt. It makes me feel like I'm not enough to make him happy, it makes me feel like he fantasizes about these other women and he would rather be with them than me. It makes me feel like I can't live up to it... ultimately slashing my self esteem and making me feel really down and rubbish about myself. I've talked to him about it and he tried explaining that it's not like that, he doesn't know or care about these people it's just visual stuff and it's no big deal and he was only watching it becau
  6. I'm a college student, 23 years old. My last serious relationship ended when I was 19. I'm doing great overall; wonderful grades, lots of social contacts, many hobbies. Should anyone ask me if I'm happy, my answer is a definitive yes, and for the past few years I've genuinely been living my best life. The only thing one could argue that I 'lack' is a romantic relationship. As I've learnt, I can be perfectly happy without one. And when not confronted with it, it's not an issue. But recently, I've had friends enter into relationships left and right, seen many beautfiul (glorified, I know) rel
  7. So my boyfriend proposed this past Thanksgiving and we started planning the wedding about two months ago. We have picked the venue and I have started dress shopping. I am very excited and I truly believe he is my soul mate, but part of me is still a little worried about how his proposal went down. Background info: We started dating 3 years ago, and moved to Chicago together a year ago (we live together in Chicago now). About 2-3 months after living together I started to uncontrollably nag him about when he wanted to get engaged. For some reason I just couldn't stop myself. I had this enormo
  8. Hey I kinda feel like I need someone to help me stop feeling so desperate and hopeless. I feel like my life is just a total mess. I feel like I’ve made so many bad choices and like I’ve screwed everything up and nothing is ever gonna get better. I’m 33, I’m dirt poor, living in a tiny flat that I can barely afford rent for, I work massively long hours on minimum wage to try to pay the bills, and I’m trying to bring up three kids as a single mum. I just feel tired and ground down by it all so bad. I feel like i've screwed up so much and there's no way out for me. I had a really roug
  9. So I have been whining a lot about my anxiety, depression and fear. I would like to try to turn it around. So I am going to drop some happy/cheerful/funny thoughts here. My first one...I think it's a hoot that Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg are friends. It's so awesome that two people who come from completely different walks of life can get along so well. I also am a fan of Fred Chang who was a contestant on Master Chef US. Just adore him. Anyone have anything to add?
  10. I just recently left a toxic situation a few days ago. Moved most of my things back to my parents house. He was at a friends place, and I've been feeling unsure about our situation for quite some time. We used to have a beautiful, loving relationship. But this year, things went to crap. He lost his job and was on unemployment. He had to spend more time with me than usual. We fought - a lot. There was a lot of name calling, things getting broken, and things getting thrown around. The thing is, we both know and understand that this is not okay and there needs to be a change. We've always s
  11. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for three years and live together. in the beginning, we were very in love with each other and I felt like I had never felt this way with anyone ever before. Things changed once we moved in together. We went through a really rough patch in our relationship after he moved in with me and it was really bad. We would fight almost every other day and I felt like we felt a lot of resentment towards each other during this period just by how we would treat each other. It got to the point where we got into a huge fight and ended up breaking up. When we broke up, I wa
  12. Several years ago, I can vividly remember how much my heart ached and I felt the void that my ex left when she walked away. I also remember trying to bargain with old man time to just rewind the previous events in order to correct what I felt was wrong not only with me but the relationship as a whole. The biggest reality check I have ever received was when my ex started seeing someone else immediately. Your heart and head try to come to some sort of conclusion as to “why”…or what did I do to deserve this. The truth is that I did nothing. Even if I had done something, it didn’t compare to my pu
  13. To A Stranger... Many years ago, I did not recognize the person in the mirror. The reflection seemed almost transparent as if I could see right through it. I did not want to see myself as “broken” though my heart knew the truth despite my brain telling me that it isn’t really over. You can hide from your friends, family and sometimes co-workers but you can’t hide from yourself. This is a tough pill to swallow because no one wants to feel vulnerable. When your heart has been broken, you have to find once again what was originally you. You have spent so much time, love and energ
  14. I've been officially single over a week but in reality after not seeing my ex since September Ive been emotionally single a lot longer. To summarise breaking up came about due to covid restrictions, growing apart during the lockdowns and just not being the right fit for me. We started dating around this time last year but haven't spent tons of time together due to covid. She is heartbroken and I'm upset about that part of her being upset but personally I feel fine about breaking up, I know I made the right choice and I'm on the right path for me and excited about the new chapter in my lif
  15. We have been "together" since November of last year, officially since February and of course with the pandemic went 3 months without seeing each other properly, we had a few social distance walks after the 3 month period and can now see each other properly, only problem is I think the relationship might be burnt out from my perspective. She's a great girl, I thought I loved her but after 3 months apart I'm not too sure, I think I realised I'm happier single, I'm not sure I can imagine myself spending the rest of my life with this girl, if she ended it with me I'm not sure if I would be that
  16. She reached out, she didn't want to get back together, she married the other guy pretty soon after. So how the heck is this a happy ending??? Just thought you guys want to know what's it like on the other end of the tunnel, since not many who have moved on really come back to tell their stories. Now this is my experience, mind you, take what is useful, discard what's not. Soon after the faithful "reach out" that we all wait for, I was crushed. I thought I had done everything right from the No-Contact rule book. I didn't call her, text her, contact her, cyberstalk her whatsoever
  17. Hello all Im sure this isn't a new unique situation to some people, and I'm sure everyone will be screaming the same answer at me. I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for nearly 4 years now and things have been getting progressively worse under the surface while remaining happy in the outside. I'm in a total rut right now and honestly, the prospect of what I have to do terrifies me. Arguments are a regular accurence now, and honest communication between us is impossible now because I have to be so careful about what I say as she gets very verbally aggresive towards m
  18. Today marks 6 months away from my best friend. She passed away unexpectedly in May, and I've been reflecting on past dreams, emotions, and memories...trying to feel better. I would like to explain a dream I had that I am certain was a visitation dream, but I would like opinions and thoughts from fellow dream interpreters! So, I was in this beautiful garden. This garden was covered with flowers and green grass. It was circular, with a big white gazebo in the middle. A river flowed around the gazebo, and the only way to get to it was to cross a white wooden bridge covered in vines and flow
  19. I don't understand. I am hurt, yes. Why do they do that? I don't understand men. I went and got involved emotionally. I have crushed on a man for awhile. It is a coworker. I know I sound like I'm 17. I'm not talking about overt flirting or anything. When we were in the office, I did catch a vibe, but I also got mixed signals...there seemed to be attraction, then not...I think all of us can relate to that. Things advanced. We started texting outside work. It turns out this "vibe" was accurate. I was pretty excited and happy about it. Yes, I know, work relationships are
  20. Happy Birthday my lovely friend ...10 years have gone by in a blink love ( and we were only early 40's sob ) I wish you a happy day and much love and kindness and happy blessings on this ...the strangest birthday I hope you ever have xxxxx I LOVE YOU XXXXX
  21. Hi everyone I would just like some advice. I am learning how to set boundaries with people I am meeting. I am also learning about how to avoid attracting attention and being 'pressured' into friendships or commitments. avoiding conflict best as possible. I am currently working with a life coach but would love your input. Please could you give me responses to these questions I face and I don't want to seem rude but I need nice 'comebacks' 1, A girl I just met for 5 minutes wants to go hang out with me. I have made continuous excuses about the pandemic but she still asks.
  22. First I need to say I’ve been with someone for 10 years. I’ve been happy, but after a few years began to become unhappy and just felt like I’ve been deteriorating. When we were first together I wanted to better our life. She has never worked in her life. She doesn’t really do a whole lot in general for me nor herself. She will make my coffee and lay out some clothes, but never cleans, comes to hug or kiss me. She has never done this, maybe in earlier dating years. I am always the one who initiates any kind of intimacy or love. She gets disability and has said she can’t really do much and
  23. Hi everyone. just seeking some help, im a guy and i just got my GF pregnant, we're both really happy about there's really not much or a problem except that i feel sorry that for my girl puking all the time and feeling nauseated and just over all weak. im not sure what my role is here im just doing all that i can but still feels like i could be doing more.
  24. Hi lovely people, Ive come to seek out for some advice again. Its something I could discuss with my therapist, but she is on holidays for a month. I wonder what the experience or opinion is from like minded people. Ive been coping with depression for a while. I remember starting with therapy was a new step in to a positive direction. Still I do feel depressed and very negative. We started processing trauma therapy some months ago. Talking about all this makes me realize that its not weird to think negative, but on the other hand its so hard to see the world in a different view. Ive
  25. Hi all, this is my first time posting and I am seeking some advice. I have been with my male partner for about a year and a half. He moved in with me in July. I feel so discontent and dissatisfied with this relationship. I want more laughter, more conversational flow, more joy and playfulness. He's quite serious and quiet. He's a good man, and I'm feeling terrible about this. I have so much shame around it... I feel like I may have moved forward when I had doubts and now he's fully living in my home and has no idea how unhappy I am in this. I don't know how to start this conversation. I know I
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