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About Me

Mod Notes

  1. For a quick reference, here is my original post: link removed She called last night and it was definitely a friendly and decent call. She told me about all of the work she is doing and she is truly busy. Her father comes in next weekend, and she has all of next week off. At one point, I finally decided to ask her straight up, "are you still interested in me?" And without hesitation, she responded, "yes". She said if the roles were reversed it would have driven her crazy all week and she would have asked sooner. She did say that while she is interested in me, its not where her focus is right now. I respect that and told her. She really appreciated that. But one thing is that she did admit that she is still talking to another guy and has met him once. I didn't react, as we have been over this before and told her well given the uncertainty of my position, I am also keeping my options open. She said she understood. She told me that it was the same situation with him, not being able to keep in contact as much because of being busy. We are supposed to get together next week. It still bugs me though. She says she is looking for a committed relationship, says she likes me a lot and enjoys spending time with me, but wants to keep things open. I know its been only a month and she probably isn't sure about me yet, but for me, you meet someone, you like them, you give them a chance. You don't play the field. My plan? Continue to keep my options open, despite the fact that I really do like her. Don't put too much energy into this until she is able to reciprocate fully. And I won't sleep with her again unless we become exclusive. I also will see how I am feeling about things next week. If it is still a problem with me, I'll tell her. She could lose out big time. Because I am the real deal!
  2. It's hard for me to trust my boyfriend of one year. I don't know if any of you have had this problem, but the main reason (among other mundane issues) for my desire to break way from him is due to the way his family treats me. Brief Intro: He has a four year old son and we are in our early twenties. I go beyond the call of duty for his child. I am playful, sincere, and understanding to my boyfriend and his child. I guess it wouldn't be such a tremendous problem that his mother vividly dislikes me, except that his reaction to her actions are that of a child. His mother is rude to me, for no particular reason, and my boyfriend fails to stick up for me. For example, one time I was in the pool with his child for over an hour and my boyfriend was hanging around outside the pool; this is at his house. His mother slips into the pool and directs the child as follows, "Child Name, why don't you stop playing with Hannah (me) and spend some quality time with your Father (my boyfriend)." I was bewildered that she could be so unappreciative and rude to my face all at once. I waited for several to see if my boyfriend would stick up for me. He failed to, instead he mumbled something I could barely make out. So I took the courtesy to stand up for myself. I guess instead, I wished he had stood up from where he was sitting back, and demanded his mother to apologize to me. Or acknowledge that her comment was unnecessary and rude. That is only one example of the mom-and boyfriend dual I often deal with. I am a student, I study hard, and I am fair. In these situations I feel like my boyfriend is disrespecting me more than his rudely mannered mother, simply because he fails to demand respect for from others. When I approach my boyfriend and confront him with how I feel and that I wish to end our relationship, he says I should ignore his mother the way he does. Is he actually right!? That's certainly not the way I was raised... Any insight on this would be really appreciated. I'm really feeling lost and worthless. Thank You.
  3. Here where I work the guys normally only use the office space area, one of the two girls [both hot] who works there decides that she wanted to work with the guys today doing the same things that they do there. She has been showing me some signs of interest on her part, going out of her way to talk to me, looking me in the eyes, and generally not acting *****y with me like she does the other guys. It happens I leave some of the material from this dating website lying around work for my other co-workers to read, and since most of us are male I felt safe just to leave it in the office area for whoever wants to read it, since there are only two girls that work a ways off and hardly come to the office. It was about 1pm and we were sitting around in the office area talking. Girl comes and picks up a phone that was sitting next to me and brushes her hand acrost my leg and goes, "whoops! Didn't mean to touch you." Then sits down next to me. This sort of made me wonder what her intent for working with the guys was today. Later at break I caught her reading a printout of the "Not dating right now" tip from the main part of the website. I know it's BAD BAD BAD to leave these sort of tips where girls can read them and figure out that someone is bringing it there, so I had to make a little compromise and turn it into an opportunity to tease her. She was away when I saw that she had place the article down and when she came back I decided to have a little fun with her. *Guy sitting next to where she was when she was away* Me: Hey, who left this here? Guy: She was reading that Me: Good, I think I'll read it. *Girl comes prancing back from the office* Her: Hey, I was reading that! Me: Calm down! Are you trying to pick up other girls or something? Her: No, I like to read this material just like all other literature. Her: Besides, I don't agree with that article, I think it's way off base. Me: Is that a fact? Well, I havn't read it yet so I don't know if I agree with you or not.. Her: Give it back, I wasn't through! *grabs for it* Me: Uhh uh, I'm having a look at it to see if I agree with it. *She makes several more "give it back" commands and tries to grab paper away but couldn't, then submits.* Her: Ok, please give it back when you are done. Me: I don't see anything wrong with this so far. Her: Can I show you something in there? Me: Tell me what page Her: I'll point to it with my pinky *She shows the part that says playboy and cosmopolitan* Her: This is associated with playboy and a bunch of other magazines and must be bad. Her: Plus, I have a boyfriend. Her: It's not biblical to have a relationship unless you wanted to marry someone. Me: *ignoring what she just said* Well, you can disagree and I can agree, we have that right Me: Now, I'm trying to read this quickly before break end, then I'll give it back to you. Me: Just read through it, I think it's great *walks towards car and puts article in back seat, girl comes and gets it while getting in.* Her: Thanks Her: Ohh, look what it says ion the front page "when a girl says she is not dating right now and what you can do about it." I don't think every man should be out dating" *two other guys that were listening to this actually say yes and agree to this, bunch of chumps* Me: Actually, girls only say that to guys they don't like. I seriously doubt she would say that to the guy she likes down the street. Her: Whatever. *She then changes the pace of the conversation a little bit with the 2 other guys including me* Her: So, do you have a girlfriend george? George: No Her: Do you Mike? Mike: nope Her: do you, Hero_99? Me: *sarcastic* Actually several, got a calculator? It's a rather large number *everyone starts chuckling a little* Her: W ell, are you dating anyone? Me: Why are you asking? *Girl then goes on a rant about how she has stayed with her boyfriend for 3 ½ years and believes in a solid faithful relationship with someone she intends to marry, blah blah blah. And that she doesn't like players. George and Mike and another guy that comes in keep nodding to every thing that she says. I just start to ignore her at this point.* We go outside and work for about an hour until we have to go back. We met up together back at the truck which has both a front and back-seat. The other guys get in and she stands there and is holding the door and says, Her your pick! *while holding the car door* Me: Ohh, I see how you are.. Trying to give me the impedence… So, I get in the front, then the back, and sit just so she couldn't close the door and when she sat down in the front I jumped into the front seat… Her: Why were you sitting on top of me? Me: Because you were sitting under me! *toothy grin* Her: Uhhh, no, hmmmm *gets a smile on her face! So we are driving back to the office, and she does a common test with the radio. Her: I don't like this radio station *starts flipping channels* *I didn't say anything to this, but she turns it to another channel and says: Her: This is better *I change the channel back to the same station she says she hated* Her: Ohh, I like this channel too.. What a nut… Well, before we got out she scooted closer in next to me and was almost touching me with her face while looking at me in the mirror. This is the same Mexican chick I dated before that was so nervous around me that I could hardly understand her. The other guys can't stand her *****ing, but I can understand why, since they seem to be frustrated chumps who don't realize she is testing to see if there are any guys of value she could be interested in. Hope they learned something from today as well as I have.
  4. well the whole ex topic again.I can understand the whole issue. with me growing up I always had crappy luck with the girls,so i've never been in that major relationship yet. OK say some of you still think about your ex,if it's an ex from months ago or years even and say someone new comes into your life and you like that person alot. with thinking about your ex does that make you ignore feelings for a current person or do any of you actually think about your ex and current liking at the same time?
  5. So out of no where, my ex stopped talking to me. He will walk into the bar and say hello to everyone BUT me, say goodbye to everyone BUT me. We broke up two years ago. I don't like his girlfriend, she doesn't like me. I buried the hatchet with her in July. My ex has been acting uncomfortable around me since immediately before I buried the hatchet with his girlfriend. Over the past 6-7 months things have gotten more and more strained when I see them out. My ex and my boyfriend are in a band together. They are good buddy friends. We're all at the bar Friday night for a friends birthday and I was standing between two of our friends. He shook the on on my left's hand, the one on my right's hand, and then left. No goodbye to me, no nothing. I have done NOTHING to deserve being treated like I don't exist. I thought we were friends and everthing was fine. In November I got an email saying congrats on the play, wish I hadn't missed it, have a good thanksgiving. And now I don't exist? The hell? This is bull-caca. His girlfriend is very insecure and I have come to the conclusion, as have our friends, that she has told him he can't talk to me anymore. She is very controlling of him in many ways...where he can go, who he can see, how much he can drink, what he can do. Our friends don't like her, his friends don't like her. I have decided to walk up to him, hopefully in front of her and our friends and say, "Oh is it ok if I say hi to you? You won't get in trouble for talking to me will you?" Make light of it and, in doing so, point out she's being controlling. Then ask him what the deal is and if he's forbidden to speak to me anymore because I thought we were all past that now and friends. I feel like driving over to his house and confronting him but I don't want him to know that it bothers me that much. If it were any of my other friends who were treating me this way I want to know why. The fact that he's my ex makes it more complicated. I don't want to come accross looking like the bitter ex girlfriend. I just want to know what happened to my friend. Is it futile? Is there any thing else I can do besides blurt out, at the end of a night of being ignored, "Oh hey it was GREAT talking to you!" and hug him goodbye? It's driving me crazy. Advice?
  6. This has been an interesting week-end to say the least..... I recently posted my story in the "Ex Girlfriend/Boyfriend Forum". link removed "Ex cheated on and left me for out her league friend". I hope I acted in the right way. I went to meet my friends at the Pub/Nightclub on Friday night that we usually attend. Upon pulling in the parking lot, I noticed a Man and Woman about to cross in front of me so I waited to let them. Well they slowly did. Low and Behold it was my Ex and the guy she cheated on and left me for. They took about 15+ seconds to cross in front. While crossing she looked at me then looked at him and laughed. So I blew the horn...Pissed her off (figured I'd get my laugh). They left and so I went inside and met my friends. Well 20 minutes later, Her, her boyfriend and all their Friends from work walked in. They walked past my friends and I with their noses in the air and stood about 10 feet away and stared at me and were talking laughing. My Ex and her new man came and went 3 more times in 2 hours and every time, they pretty much brushed me when they walked by yet looked away, her not once saying "Hi". I was mad at first but decided I was there for a good time. The last time they left, I said to my friends while laughing "Thank You Lord". Her friends stayed and never got more then 10-15 feet from My friends and I. As the night went on, I started talking to a nice, pretty girl and was getting to know her. About 30 minutes in- my Ex's girlfriends started asking if I had a couple cigarettes and a lighter. Being nice I gave them and they walked away. About an hour into the conversation with my new prospective girl, one of my ex's friends approached me again, and started "interigating me". She asked if I knew who she was. I acted like I never saw her before. She told me who she was and asked how I was doing (Guess I was supposed to be depressed/mad-I dunno). I told her this is the best I've felt in 4 years. That there are a lot of nice girls out tonight. She went on talking about how my Ex never meant to hurt me and still thinks the world of me, yet she is extremely happy with her new man. I told her great, better him that has to deal with her then me. She asked a thousand questions from If and who I was dating, If I liked the girl, to how long I've been attending this bar to what I thought of my ex…I was determined to stay in a very good mood and basically told her that I tried to be my Ex's friend but my ex never did her part. I told her I was disappointed how the ex cheated on and left me and waited till X-MAS to tell the truth. I told her I heard my ex ran her mouth about me and that all I now want is my stuff back. I told her I was dating a nice girl off and on and that I love how my life is going. Told her I was going after my dreams. She kept repeating "your ex still thinks the world of you and never said a bad thing about you, she hasn't talked to you because she is trying to move on-she's extremely happy". I told her that was funny she only talks nice of me, because the last time I saw her family, they snubbed me like I was garbage. She didn't say much to that and went back to her group. I had a good time regrouping with my prospective girl and ignored them the rest of the night, yet I could feel their beady eyes burning a hole though my back. Nothing happened with the prospective girl, I simply enjoyed talking to her and I expressed how I hoped to see her next weekend. I left at closing time. So, I went to the same bar again (my hang out) last night and met my friend. We were there for about 20 minutes when my Ex's new B/F and about 6 of his friends walked in. It has been 3 months since I have seen my Ex and the 2nd time in my life to see him so that is either ironic or planned. They looked at me and sat about 15 feet away and kept looking my way. I decided to ignore them and continued talking and laughing to the cute little girl sitting next to me. The night went on and my friend eventually left. Showing I wasn't scared or bothered with them, I stayed about 30 minutes longer and walked out. When I got in my truck, they just "happened" to walk out of the bar and were parked 3 spaces from me. They were looking at me and laughing. Being the better person, I left and unintentionally spun snow their way. The thing is that my ex knows that I am strong and quick. She has witnessed me break many a bar fight up. She knows that I will not fight unless it is in defense of someone (woman mostly) needing help. Her new man is a feminine man to put it "nice". I think he knew I was going to be there and brought his back up and was going to try something last night. To be honest my Ex is not worth either my time or energy after dealing with 3 months of lies. I waited for her friendship and have moved on and now she all of a sudden pops back in. After seeing what she cheated on and left me for, I now laugh. Good Riddence. So what do you think of my Ex's friends questioning me and staring at me. What do you think about her new B/F showing up at the bar the next night? Did I tell her friend the right things?
  7. can you not see that i am in pain? are my screams to you all in vein? do you not see what i do or notice the harm? must i break down and cry, or wear it on my arm? is it beyond what words can explain? is it more that you want to hear? are you going to let me fall? do you ignore this out of fear? scattered stained razorblades lay on my bed and yet you say nothing you watched me as i bled ive even told you in spoken word the part about suicide and self harm must have gone unheard should i quit and say goodbye? or keep trying?i will carry on my own i will fight this i will break the habit and kill the pain all alone. oppinions?very very emotional when i wrote this. any feedback welcome -sTiTcHeS
  8. Alright, I should explain this as thoroughly as possible. What I want is all different sorts of advice on the subject as well. This is a little deep, so only respond if you can pay attention. There was this girl I worked with, who was a social leper. Always angry, pissy responses, typical immaturity. Typical teenage angst. Angst because she couldn't socialize very well, Im thinking? But I had music interests in common with her. She had a stuttering problem, so as usual with everyone, I was friendly. I wasn't interested in this girl except as to wanting to be a friend, there was no attraction. Well I was nice to this girl until she decided to leave somewhere, military. Bootcamp. I asked her recruiter if I could write her a letter, my intent was to ask about bootcamp experience. She knew I was going to the same place. I have since told the military to go to hell & filed my DEP seperation form. Now Im in college. Anyway.. Well after I told them that, she came back in her 5th week (there are 8 weeks), dropping out or was kicked out, of bootcamp. When she came back, she told everyone at work that I am STALKING her. This social leper seems to be very serious? I had really thought I wasn't on this girl's nerves; I was always friendly, and everyone at work (I've settled the matter) knows I have a girlfriend. I don't mean to be arrogant, but Im on a higher level than that. Everyone now knows I only wanted to ask about bootcamp experience too. As usual, nobody at work likes the girl because of her attitude. But this nutty girl still doesn't know, Im thinking word will get to her? But what Im asking is: Should I settle the matter with this closed person myself, and if so, how exactly should I word it? How can I settle this matter to a person who tends to ignore everything I say & immaturely hides behind things & knocks things over almost LEAPING out of the way when Im walking by as if I had a disease. LoL. I don't mean to have the girl act so scared either. I didn't think she was retarded, only had the stuttering problem, but? hmm Aye, people can be nuts.. Advice anyone? I need ADVICE.
  9. Hey all, Well as some of you know, I have been having quite a lot of problems with my boyfriend of two years recently. He is in a very stressful job, where he is going through hell at the moment and has a tendency to take it out on me when he phones, if he phones. We have been going a lot recently. As you know, he felt like I was always annoyed with him for never calling or being there, when he just didn`t have the time. Well, a few nights ago I was out with my friends and ended up getting very very drunk. I`m not proud of it, but let`s just say the paramedics got involved. I can honestly say that I rarely get drunk and that was a one-off and will not happen again. In the end I didn`t have to go to hospital or anything but my boyfriend was called and he came to take me back to his flat to sleep it off. The next day he was very very angry with me. I apologised etc but he still seemed very cold and unaffectionate. That night I spoke to him on the phone. He was behavng strangely. He says that he feels he isn`t making progress anywhere in his life just now, but wouldn`t clarify what exactly he meant. He said he wasn`t angry about the drinking, but that he still feels that I am always angry with him just now. I told him that I wasn`t angry. He said I haven`t done anything to make him feel like that, it is just a tone he always senses. Well, and we haven`t spoken since. It is Valentine` Day, and I haven`t heard anything from him. It is now seven o clock so I can`t see us doing anything tonight. I really feel that this is the end of the road. I want this to end but I love him .I really need to know I`m doing the right thing. Or do I just give him more time? I know he is so stressed still..
  10. I just thought I'd let everyone know what happened. Well, this girl at work, S, came to my house after work one night (we work 2nd shift, 3pm-12am), and used my computer because she needed to do something online for school and didn't have a computer. So we did that and we just talked until like 2am. I really like this girl so i wanted to take it slow, maybe a mistake? Anyway, when she went to leave I let her follow me to the gas station and then to where she would know where she was at. When we were at the gas station, I asked her out for yesterday evening. I didn't mention a time or where we would eat or anything like that. so, yesterday at around 1:30/2:00 pm she called saying that her sister called her and asked if she wanted to go with her on a gambling boat. And that she never gets to see her sister so she decided to go with her instead. And she said that she felt bad for cancelling on the first time. I dont know her that well, so i can't judge her on this aspect. But i'm always skeptical from the start, but i never just not believe someone until they lie to me. But from what i've told you, does she sound sincere? Also, how soon should I call her for another date? I WILL probably see her monday at work and possibly tuesday at school and work. -----------------------------------------------------------------------More Background Information--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The first time I ever really talked to her was at school. I saw her, said "hi" and we talked for a few minutes. I walked her to her car and she gave me a ride back. Her car was a mess lol...and she said "the next time you get in my car, i promise it'll be clean" lol Everytime I see her and we're talking now, she's always smiling and really open about stuff. ....I just need to know how long I should wait to ask her out again. I don't want to seem desperate, because i'm not. And I don't want her thinking i'm mad or want to ignore her or anything because she cancelled on me, because I'm not mad and I don't want to ignore her.
  11. Okay...to me this sounds dumb and mean but apparently it seems to work....There is this girl i really like...i have liked her from the beginning of the year...i finally gut up the nerve to ask her out. we had a pretty good time if i do say so myself....then a couple of days later she asked me over to her house to watch a scary movie....it went pretty well considering her parents where in the next room and liked "checking" in. then yet again a couple of days later she came over to my place to watch a movie. i know this sounds all well and good but =S i have no idea how to read her....like i touch her like brush up against her or put my arm around her and i get.....nothing.....she does not tense up or pull away or anything but she does not get closer she is just "normal"......then this last week i have been getting mixed signals like one min she seems to want to be together then others its like she could car less about me......so in the last couple of days i have started to be more distant...like talking to her less...or not sitting beside her or going on msn and not saying hi and waiting for her to say it.....and to my surprise she seems to be getting closer while i am getting farther away....soooo my question is should i keep on doing this and if yes for how long and how far should i take it....and WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?
  12. As a lot of posts begin this is going to seem lame...but I care and im an ignorant guy =) Recently I started working at a new company and yes theres a girly im already digging on (I know dating co-workers is usually a bad idea but you only live once). We introduced ourselves to eachother with the smiles and everything and I sensed a little vibe between us, unfortunately we havent really had a conversation and we dont know eachother so at this point im just attracted to her and would like to get to know her more but anyway...Since im new to the company and she is pretty new herself I havent really made any obvious moves showing her I have interest (if you want to know why its simply because im new and want a career out of the company so I want to be careful for myself and her, and im hardly smooth), so every little chance I have to show her that im a nice guy I take it (im really not, hehe). So yesterday she and this guy (co-workers) come up to the little group of us that are new and offer to get us something to drink. So she comes up to me and asks me what I want to drink and I say ice tea or if they dont have tea just get me a soda. So they come later to give us the drinks and she brings me both tea and soda (trust me I know this is lame) and keep in mind this is like 20 minutes before we have to leave work (us new people). I try to stay healthy so I dont drink the soda and decide to put the tea back (I know she made an extra effort for the tea because its not available like the soda is) to simply let someone else have it. So today I completely get the cold shoulder from her. Not one little glance =( So heres what im getting at (im sorry I couldnt make this shorter), me putting the drinks back and most likely her seeing I put them back would that insult her a little bit or make it seem like im being rude? I was not at all trying to be rude. basically the question is: IF she has interest would she take something small like that personally? Or is there another reason she would just ignore me one day? And if she did take it the wrong way is there a way I can make it up to her without making things uncomfortable in the work place? Or should I just leave it alone and give it time and act like I dont care? I dont know her so its all probably irrelevant but I at least want to be on her good side because you just never know. Anyway thanks for reading this whole thing (if you did) and thanks for the advice or answers ahead of time.
  13. Hey everyone...I think this site is addicting. I am on it so much now a days, it really helps to talk about what we are going through to each other.. UPDATE.... so as many of you know, my boyfriend broke up with me on Wednesday...5 days ago. ( link removed ) and I decided to give him what he wanted (mostly he said he was unhappy as we had been having petty fights..) So after begging and crying I came to my senses and just let him be. Let him live with his decision..full on NC for 5 days....I went out with friends, got busy...stuff like that. WELL--> I came home last night and theres an email from him saying that he is haunted by what happened, and he really wants to talk, and see what im up to, and that hes really bummed and can't get his mind off me...he suggested meeting up for coffee. It sounds like he is really missing me. I DIDN"T WRITE BACK!....i think that he needs time to sit with his decision and realize what a mistake he made. He was a A## in a lot of ways... THis morning, since I didn;t write back, there was an email begging me to reply...I just got it. And don't think I'm going to reply...just yet anyways.. MY question is...I am not too sure what the intention of the email is. I mean, if it's just to check in and talk, and catch up cause he misses me I'd rather not have any part of it..Id just rather heal and move on.. But if hes having second thoughts, I think we need to talk. There are things that he does that are unacceptable in our relationship (mainly maintaining cyber relationships with other girls) and i don't want to jump back into anything and then have the end result of being heartbroken happen again. I am just really unsure how to approach this whole thing. Should I write him back? I mean its been 5 days..thats not THAT long...keep ignoring him? ...but I don't want him to really just give up.... I might be kinda playing this game where I am ejoying having him sort of chasing me...Feels like I've gained back some sort of power..which is nice. I guess I like thinking that he is realizing what a mistake he made.... I just don't know what to do. I know that we could work as a couple, even have a great future together if we worked things out, but I don't want to get hurt again... SHould I wait? Should I write back?? Just Keep ignoring him and move on???? ANY IDEAS??
  14. This is a long read, so skip it if you don't have the time. I guess the main reason I'm posting this is to get this expressed out and so I can kind of put it into perspective for myself more than to get a reply from other people. My main problem here is that I don't really understand what I'm wanting from a particular girl right now. There's this girl that I used to like a lot from when I was a student, and looking back now, I could tell she liked me a lot too. I had liked her for quite a while but I was just too scared to ever ask her out, and I always ended up going out with girls that I liked less (and thereforeeee wasn't scared by). Anyway, one time when I decided to finally ask her out (a couple years after knowing her), I found out she had a boyfriend (fair enough, I never made a move for so long) but she still seemed to be interested in me. She used to blush when I was around, and always gave me a special look. And she was really happy I asked her out. So, at that time I felt I was in a good position to go out with her (she seemed to like me a lot more than her boyfriend, who she complained about a bit). And I thought given the right time, we would probably get together soon. But, yeah, within a few days of asking her out, again I got scared again(don't know why, but I just got the idea in my head that she was playing around with me and just wanted me as an ego boost) and just kind of gave her the cold shoulder out of the blue. She seemed pretty hurt and kind of kept on ignoring me for a while after that. Anyway, a few days after that, she seemed to always bump into me with her boyfriend around (who probably didn't know what was going on), and then I got the idea that she was trying to make me jealous and I guess at the same time, she knew I figured it out, so we kind of started sending each other all these signals, and we were getting closer to being together again, then me being me, I got paranoid again and started ignoring her. I decided to stay away from her for a while, and I went for a few months without seeing her until one time where me and a female friend of mine ran into her and asked her to join us for lunch (after not seeing her for a long time). At this point in time, she seems to start liking me again just by the way she acted and looked at me. I decided to play it cool and just stay as friends though. I happened to see her around the school a few times but decided not to say hi to her and just move on. And I went back to my old routine of going out with girls I liked less. So this all finished about half a year ago. Now I've graduated and I've been head hunted and offered a job by a huge company, and I'm taking the oppurtunity, which requires moving to a different continent). Anyway, after accepting this job about a month ago, I started thinking about this girl again, and I guess it's natural to think about her occasionally and thought it would pass. But I'm still thinking about her and my thinking about her has just gotten more intense. I'm thinking this is probably me freaking out about moving so far away, and it's just getting out of control now. I can't keep my mind focused anymore. I'm not used to feeling this kind of regret about anything. When I screw up I can usually accept it and just learn from it, but I just hate the way I handled this. This girl liked me, and was one of the sweetest, kindest, and most caring girls that ever come around. And I just hate the fact that I didn't give her a chance even though I wanted her so much. Anyway, I've just been wanting to meet her again and maybe just talking and seeing where that goes, but I don't have her phone number, and she's most likely graduated too, so I'm left with no way of finding her. I did happen to find her on one of those OldFriends websites and I could leave a message there, but that would feel very uncomfortable for me (just leaving her a message and waiting for her to get back as opposed to making a phone call and keeping things immediate.) And I don't really know where she is in life either. If she's got a good relationship with a serious boyfriend, then I don't want intefere at all. So yeah, can't get her out of my head, not really sure if I like her or if it's just the feeling of regret going on. Anyway, if you've read through all that, cheers. I know it's long. And I'm not really sure what I want with all this, I just needed to get it out of my head. And some things do seem a bit clearer now.
  15. I have looked in teh mirror every morning this week and towards tuesday morning there was some ginger in my eyebrowns, and now they are proctically all ginger.. thinking to myself, my eyebrowns are like my hair, (chaning colours in sun) i ignored it but now its starting to annoy me, i have a mixture of hair colours depending on the season -summer= Bright blonde and winter a dark blonde. Is this eyebrow thing just something to do with sun etc like my hair.. cant believe that they would change in like a few days
  16. Most people would think that if someone ignores you, its definitely a sign that their not interested. However, this is really confusing me and my friends can't seem to understand the situation either. To start off, I want to say that earlier this school year I became attracted to this girl in my advanced math class. The first time our eyes met I felt this instant attraction. However, I tried not to let our eyes meet obsessively because I had previously been in a situation that started the same way and didnt go so well. Because of this...I decided that I'd try to talk to her right away. So one day after class I went right up to her and asked her "how she was doing in math". She just responded "ok" and didnt ask me anything...I found that quite odd because it appeared she was interested in me in the way she looked at me. So anyways weeks passed...and I soon found her staring at me again constantly...I tried to avoid it...but I soon started to fall for her... Over this past year, I've tried numerous times to talk to her (strike any type of converstation)...even have written her a letter telling her that I'd like to get to know her...but she doesnt respond. and just recently she flat out ignored me when i asked her a question- so now I've decided to ignore her also...but now she seems like shes depressed or something...and shes still staring at me with those ever so beautiful eyes. Can anyone explain this? Is she maybe shy? interested? or not interested at all?
  17. OKay....I have this friend who I am not too happy with right now. We have been friends for about 4 years...on and off. She has this nasty habit of ditching people. With me....about every 3-6 months she will up and ditch me. When we have plans, I always follow up with her to make sure we are still on (ie: to make sure she doesn't ditch me). 2 saturdays ago, we were supposed to go to a movie. I called her at work in the afternoon....she tells me she was going to the doctor because she was sick (which I knew). So...not a big deal, tell her to call me when she is done to make sure she is okay. She calls me later...I said I was with a friend going to study and I tell her if she is up to it, come by and have a coffee...she says most likely she will. So I tried calling her a few times during the evening...she doesn't answer her phone. I was getting worried. Then she calls at midnight, freaking out and literally hysterical because her and her boyfriend had a huge fight. So we go out for a quick coffee...I help her, etc, etc. So the Tuesday after, we were out for dinner with one of my other friends...and she starts telling HER what happened with the fight with her bf. Now, with me she said "we were leaving the hospital....", then when she was retelling the story she says "So, there was another 45 minutes until the movie started...". SO I say to her...."were you at the hospital or the movies?"....and she says "oh, I am confused" and reverts back to the story being told from the hospital. I was like fine, whatever and left it alone. So the Saterday that just passed, we were supposed to go see the movie that we didn't get to see previously. I tried calling her all Friday evening....and left a few messages. She pretty much ignored me, and didn't call me back. Tried calling her on her break at work Sat, she didn't answer her phone. So by this time I knew I was getting ditched. See, she does this when she is going to ditch someone....pretty much ignores them until the very moment she is supposed to be somewhere, then says she can't go. So, I call her when we are supposed to be meeting, and she says "I don't think I can make the movie tonight...my mom called freaking out and I have to go to this family meeting". I say to her "I tried calling you all last night"....and she said very quickly "I was asleep"...then suggests that if she was done in time, then we could get to the late show. Needless to say, she didn't call back. The thing is, when she has a real "reason", she always calls as soon as she can't make it, apologizes, and makes plans for another night. THIS is how I know that she was lying through her teeth. THEN, when she thinks someone is mad at her, she just ignores them because she doesn't want a "confrontation". I have told her many times before that it is the "ignoring" that makes me even angrier than the ditching. I just see it as a complete lack of respect for my time, as I am always the last to know.....and it is always too late to make plans with someone else....so I sit at home, while she is out doing something "better". She has also complained to me about another friend who does this exact thing to her....how ironic. I left her a message on Mon night saying "if you aren't going to ignore me for 2 weeks, call me".....I haven't heard anything from her. We never talk about this problem properly because she avoides me until she thinks I have "forgotten" about it. We talk everyday, and see each other at least twice a week....so she is more than an aquataince. I am really tired of chasing her. I don't want to stop being friends with her....but if this is going to continue, then I don't want to be around her. What am I supposed to do now?
  18. alright, i see this girl at my lunch and she doesnt look at me or anything unless i bring up a conversation to her or talk to her friend then shell look at me, is she just too shy to talk to me or what? i dont understand it, she doesnt ignore me she just doesnt look at me or stare at me, she will do it rarely without a conversation or anything......i just wanna know whats goin on
  19. At work, someone tells me that "Bob" thinks I'm cute. I've never talked to him, he ignores me, but I notice he stares at me a lot. A while later, I am talking to his friend "Jill" and we start talking about him and I ask her to casually mention that I also think he is cute. Then he completely stops staring at me and still ignores me. here is a link to my previous post about him: link removed I think what happened is "Jill" told him everything we had talked about. I don't remember exactly what I told her (since this was at least over a month ago) but I remember we were talking about how he is in college. And I think she thought I was implying that since he is in college (and I'm in University), he's not as smart...but I didn't mean to! So he was "mad" at me for a while. Who knows what else she told him??? I even saw him with some girl at work, and they walked by me a few times. I can give you more details of other things he did if you need them. But now I notice that he's not "mad" at me anymore. He even said, "Hey & How's it going" to me the other day. He stares at me, but it's not as much as before and he does it more discreetly too. So, what does this mean? Does he like me? I just want to be friends with him though...how do I get that message accross to him?
  20. My beloved bf lost a lot of weight on a program before he met me, but the program ended and now he's starting to gain it back! He talks a lot about plans to lose the rest, yet suddenly I'm seeing him ordering Humongo Burgers and three slices of pie. I'm wary of becoming the nanny. But neither am I comfortable sitting by and watching him unconsciously gain it all back, since he was so proud of his results. I have been skinny all my life -- I could use some help here so I don't say the wrong thing. Should I totally ignore it and just keep telling him he's beautiful and sexy (which he is)? Wait and give him some time/space to get it together on his own? Attempt to comment in a lighthearted, loving way? Sit him down and say it's time to re-up your program?
  21. Last year I had a major crush on this one girl, I think she liked me at first too. I tried to show her I like her by being as nice as I can be, and I have to say it wasn't cheap to do so. But eventually she stopped talking to me, even ignoring me on msn. Then I tried something else, I wasn't really nice anymore. In fact everytime I was hanging out with a girl I'd make fun of them (not in a mean way) for the whole time we were out together. For some reason this seem to click better with girls, these girls I don't like started trying to talk to me, tried to get my number (which I never gave cause you know how annoying some teeange girls can get). But my question to all the other ladies (and guys if you have experience with this). Is wether or not it's true for you that you fall for guys more when they tease you in a conversation. (Guys feel free to comment on this) Btw with the teasing thing the girl I had a crush on is starting to talk to me on msn, course her chance came and left
  22. My ex broke up with me in June/July. We had been together for 5 years and living together at the time. She said that she wasn't in love with me anymore. We were did NC for about 2 weeks and then started to have some contact. I was about to leave on a business trip lasting 3 weeks. The day before I left, she said that she wanted to talk to me in person and that she "meant it." She asked me to call her when I got home. So I called her when I got home. No answer. No reply to my message saying that I was back. Then I find out that she is seeing somebody else. I guess I am back into NC and moving on to better things. I can't see that there is anything else that I can do. If she wants to see somebody else and can't even return a phone call with a "thanks for the message" then I don't know what I am wasting my time on. Does this sound reasonable?
  23. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years, and I love him will all my heart. We have had our ups and downs, and fights and all the typical high school drama. But I really do love him and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Well, on the first day of school he broke up with me. He said "I don't want a girlfriend right now" but he does, he was just lying to me. Apparently, he just suddenly doesn't like me anymore. I don't get it at all. I have tried to talk to him about it, and he agreed to be just friends, and that he would be my partner in tennis in gym. Well, today we had tennis and he completely ignored me. He didn't speak to me or wave at me. But he was very boisterous with his friends, lots of goofing around and being loud. But I could tell he wasn't really being himself. I called him after school and I asked him why he didn't even acknowledge me, and at first he tried to claim he didn't see me, but I know he did. What is his problem? Why is he ignoring me? There is no reason for him to be mad at me. He told me I was annoying him, so I guess I'm just not going to speak to him anymore. I almost hate him now. Why would someone who a week ago was telling me that they wanted to marry me, now ignore me? Its bizarre and everyone I talk to about this thinks he is a jerk and insane. I just don't know how to handle this because I want him back and I really do love him deeply.
  24. My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me about a week ago. He hadn't been talking to me until today. Last gym class that we had together, he deliberately ignored me. Today, he teased me, and later on in the cafeteria he winked at me. What does this mean? I don't know if he wants to get back with me or if he is just playing with my emotions. What should I do? I don't want to make a fool of myself, and I'm definitely not going to beg him to be with me. What should I do? I've been putting extra effort into my appearance the last week to make him want me back. How should I handle this?
  25. i like this girl a looot and were really good friends but i always make stupid mistakes at the most inappropriate times. Like i end up going out with another girl and then i find out that she wouldve gone out with me. I also have a problem with talking around her and i end up getting quiet and i cant think of anything to say. I know i should be confident and i usually am able to pull it off until the last moment and i start getting too attached. I make really lame comments and i am too forward. i just made another stupid mistake. I asked this other girl out and then i find out that the girl i like mightve gone out with me. The next day i find out that the girl i like has a bf(it only lasted two days) and not only that, the girl i asked out said no. i called her on the first day and i tried to convince her to change her mind about me and over the last few days ive been trying to hard and i think i might be scaring her off a little. This has not been the first time something like this has happened. Its like a never-ending pattern than i desperately want to stop. Can someone please give me a failproof plan to get her to date me?(I dont care how long it takes as long as Its not more than a month or so.) i have already gotten advice with this part^ It has been a little while since i last admitted that i liked her. she is extremelly spontaneous and confusing so i have no idea what she is thinking. Anyways, i have been ignoring her lately and im almost positive that shes noticed(ive used this strategy before and it worked except it was just because i started liking someone else and i ended up missing my chance). and im also pretty sure that later on shell IM me and ask me why ive been ignoring her. And i would like to ask the ladies out there what i should say in this situation to eventually end up asking her out. or if she doesnt ask y ive been ignoring her, then what i should say to gradually introduce the topic of going out into the convo so that i can ask her without seeming random. Could all you ladies help me out as soon as possible?(guys can give some advice too but i trust the females on this topic more)
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