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  1. I (M28) dated my now ex gf (F26) for 2 years and half a month. She was my first gf. She broke up with me on the 1st April this year... (yeah I first thought it would be an Aprils fools joke) because she said she wasn't happy anymore with our relationship and needed to do it before she would suffer mentally from it. After work the told me if we could talk. At the time being I didn't knew why she was not happy anymore. The days before we didnt had arguments and everything seemed normal imo... So I was really shocked by it. I cried, begged, promised I would change and do whatever I can to take me back. But of course it didn't work. Well now I do know the reasons (through thinking a lot): I basically didn't show her enough that I love and care for her (rarely bought flowers, didn't push her (we sometimes talked about going to the gym together or going out more often. We never did). I didn't help much with chores or I forgot to do some of them when she asked me to do them. I was gaming addicted (spend thousands of euros on mobile games. I went into treatment half a year ago after my last fallback...). I went to 1 on 1 sessions but rarely went to group meetings. (She was clearly disappointed by the later). But I manage to get over it. The break up kind of helped too... 😕 The addiction was one of the reasons she nearly broke up with me half a year into the relationship. The last few months were a bit declining especially in terms of ambition on my part. I am in apprenticeship as an IT specialist for system integration. I got a bit of trouble in work got basically out sourced and I need to find a new job after I am done. I didn't learn much for the then upcoming exam (a week ago). (Which I am sure did well on after finally learning for it after the break up). Me and my gf did a lot of things together (watching movies, series and YouTube or playing some games together when she wanted). So we got pretty much along really good. But I now know there are more things to a good relationship... To add to that: I went straight to life with my parents to my ex. So I never really learned how to life alone and manage all this stuff... 😕 After the break up I stayed two weeks until I found a new place. I now life with two males and we get along really good. In the time between this I did all the chores (for myself to form a new habit) and noticed how hard it was for her. One day she forgot something I messaged her about and I was frustrated (now I know how she must have felt...) My ex told me we could be friends (I first declined but accepted it a day later) and when I asked her (two times) if she thinks we can get back together she told me: "I don't know. Time needs to tell". She talked to my mother once and they basically both said: "I think he is learning from his mistakes". We are currently on friendly terms and texting sometimes. Most of the times I initiate it. But it's light and friendly. I think she enjoys it. I told her via phone call that I accepted the break up, want to look forward, learned my lesson but I like her a lot and want the friendship to work between us. So what I basically want to ask, do you think there is any hope, if I show her I change my behaviours? And can make her happy the next time? I mean the door for it is open?! Should I tell her I am trying to get her back? Or just go with the flow, being a good friend, try to show my changes? TLDR: gf broke up with me because I was lazy and didn't show her how much she meant for me, she lost trust in me. Is there a possibility to get back together, if I show her while being friends that I change?
  2. hey kids, i just want to extend a big thank you to all of you who have been helping me get through my break up these past few weeks. this site has done more help than anything else. my story is...i have been broken up with my ex for almost 2 months because i wasnt sure where it was going or what i wanted, and i havent seen or spoken to her for basically the entire time. i heard she was in a car accident last night, she is fine...was able to walk away but her car was totaled, we never established "NC" but we naturally went into that mode...should i call or make some sort of contact??
  3. Hey, I hope everyone is doing well. Let me get straight to the point. My ex and I broke up last January, 16th January 2022 to be exact (what a way to start 2022 right) we’ve dated for 9 months and during that period of time, we were happy, I was happy. But everything turned down hill all of sudden. It’s been almost 2 months and it still stings. There’s a void in my heart every time I think about him. Everything reminds me of him and I keep looking for ‘him’ in someone else. The pain isn’t as bad as before but I still feel empty. I have never been like this before. It usually takes a short time for me to forget someone and I don’t know how to deal with this one. I’m scared it’ll take me a very long time to move on while he lives his life peacefully. Any advice on how should I completely let go of him and our past memories? Thank you, x.
  4. I look on this forum a lot to see if there are any new stories about people getting back together with their ex's. I do it just so that I can have some hope, and I really hope someday I can post my story on here to give others confidence that having hope pays off. In the meantime, I am going to make a list of actual stories of people I know that broke up and got back together. Please post your stories here too and we can put a little bit of cheer into this forum. 1. My friend was dumped by his girlfriend of 4 years. They were broken up for a year and a half and he tried everything to get her back. One day he was with his friend talking about her and she called him right then to talk about something trivial, and he went over to her house. They got back together and now they are engaged. 2. My friend's sister and her husband broke up for four years and now they are married with 3 kids. 3. My friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when we were 19 and they got back together a few years later and have been together ever since. 4. My other friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when she was a sophomore in college and they just got back together and now they live together. 5. A friend of my ex's was so sad about a girl forever, talked about her all the time when we were out at the clubs, couldn't believe they broke up, etc....now they have been back together for over a year. 6. My friend and her boyfriend dated for a few years, broke up for 9 months, now they are engaged. She says their relationship is better than ever now they are back together. 7. My friend was hung up on this guy forever, he would go back and forth and never commit, now they are living together and she is going to have a baby. They are really happy and in the end it worked out great. That is just some of the stories I know off the top of my head. Please post any stories of reconciliation that you know of so that we can have some cheer in this forum.
  5. So me and my girlfriend are dating for a little over a year now. It's been 1 month we started living together. Before that, we used to meet nearly everyday. She's 26, I'm 24. Now, after moving in together my girlfriend have taken up a leadership course which has her stay out for multiple days and come back late at night. I naturally am upset about it but ofc I do support her. The course require her to share the most personal things in group and she does it so with a lot of folks. She have made some male friends and talks to them often, for the little time she has at home in these few days with me, she tends to go on audio calling one of her friend. I feel left out and I did not mention it, thought I'll go easy right now cuz the course can be very intense and tiring. Little do I know, she's getting very close to another guy(has girlfriend) which is too uncomfortable for my liking. I don't like to be controlling but I saw her and his messages about how she wants to go to UK and he goes on and ask her to bring him along. some more BLA BLA and then I see some message exchange about bra sizes.Moreover, she's been dressing up Extremely nicely. it's cold as fk outside and she wears short skirt even tho I asked her not to wear skirt because they can be too revealing (controlling me I know but I can't help it). if she asks me not to wear mini skirts, I won't because it makes her uncomfortable. I expect some emotional responsibility in the relationship but I am just not feeling it with her. all in all, it feels like we are not the same like we used to and we are falling apart into different directions.. when I bring such things with her, most of the time, she laughs it off like it's nothing. But my feelings are my feelings, I expect some sympathy. a bit about me. I'm 24, pisces, this is my first serious relationship and I tend to be kind of insecure about things. Maybe I am just wasting her time because if I am not being myself around her then it's pointless to be together because one way or another, we will end up not happy. My values are going to try overtaking her, she is going to resist and boom, we are done. What I want from this platform and you the one reading is some opinions. Be it your own experiences(extremely appreciated), you 2 sense about my situation or just teach me a lesson if I need to learn something about relationships. P.S this disturbance and relationship anxiety has been going on for some time on my side. If you guys want more details on any parts, let me know.
  6. In my opinion...online. If you have met the girl in person and one day she wakes up and says to herself, "Gee, I am going to break up with my boyfriend." and then she does it, it is a rather sickening and horrific way of getting rid of you. Sadly in some cases there isn't a choice. This has happened to me nearly a year ago but I know friends both male and female who are victim to this. I think the worst thing is it seems easy for them. They do not see the pain in your eyes when you are told the news. They cannot see your facial expression to see how much it affected you. They cannot see the torture you have just endured for that second you read that note. They cannot see how all of your hopes and dreams have been wiped off the face of the earth and so has all of your efforts of being with that person. It is a horrible way to die and trust me, I feel for you guys out there because I been there and I would rather be lonely for good than to even imagine what the dumper is thinking in their mind. It appears so horrible for the fact that this person APPEARS to have put no effort into getting rid of you. I seen chickens receieve a better ending than that. So what ways do you think are horrible ways to go out? Let's hear some experiences and get the loads of crab dung off our chests.
  7. I have gone through this before. Im on my 4th breakup with my ex. But the worst feeling in the world is having feelings for someone who no longer wants to be with you, hang out with you, see you or call you. It happened suddenly, I was not expecting it. I feel lots of pain, and though I wont do anything stupid the impotence is so much that I just wish I was dead in order not to feel this. Help me cope please. I miss him and want to move to his city and do anything posible to make it work again, but I know he has blocked me out and that there is absoultely nothing I can do to change it. I think of him every day, all the time. Pleople are getting sick of me, and there is nothing I can do to change his mind and make him love me. Help me please
  8. Hi guys, so I am M(24) ex F(22) we were together for 18 months and lived together for around 1 year of that. She first broke up with me 2 and a half months ago but she immediately regretted that decision and we got back together 1 hour later. That lasted 2 weeks then she broke up with me again. After 2 days of begging I went No contact and have not reached out since. After the breakup, It took her only a week for her to go on holiday to a different country and move into her 'friends' place who she's know for 5 years and become a official relationship on facebook with this guy. So she's living her dream - living somewhere free, no job and this guy is spoiling her. This guy is not her usual type. Throughout the next month she has blocked and unblocked me a couple times, bearing in mind I have not even reached out in any way. So I find out they are now engaged! Exactly 2 months after our breakup. A day after her engagement announcement she unblocked me from Instagram! This is when I start to realize she is most likely a narc and started looking back on the red flags. I just want your opinions / thoughts. This is all very new and painful to me. Is she a Narc? How can you move on that quickly? Why unblock me to see? Will they ride off into the sunset? Thanks in advance.
  9. I'm in my late 30's and just got dumped by my girlfriend of 6 years. I love her and it's also clear she still loves me. Her reasons for breaking up is I've been lazy , taken her for granted and kinda have lost all ambition. I previously made a lot of money as an engineer but sadly got made redundant when I was 28. I got a a really big pay out that coupled with the money I saved, I took some time to develop property (which I own out right). Fast forward some time and I met my girlfriend and I move 400 miles to be together. I got a job but it didn't last, in that time we got a dog, which I got obsessed with and spent all my time on. I'm not living of rent money that's coming in from my property. I am looking for a job but I'm really struggling to find anything. So basically in just coasting along , not good I know. Pandemic hit and my hopes of finding something was crushed. Nobody recruiting and the huge gap of unemployment makes me really unattractive to recruiter's. So I kinda give up. My plan was/is to set up my own business. Start with dog walking and slowly overtime become a dog training that's something I will be good at. Back to the relationship my girlfriend is really frustrated with me. She's super busy and psychically and emotionally unavailable. This goes on for a while. I've fallen into a bit of a rut. I'm have the world away from my own life and it feels like I'm alone. I don't feel secure in the relationship. So I'm zoning out and going into my own little world. You know it kinda becomes like we are just living together. Don't get me wrong the sex is there, and we do have our moments. It's just we are not in the right head space. I do need time to sort myself out. I'm not exactly the person I want to me and this break up I'm going to use to drive me into action. I really need time to work on myself and get my head our if the clouds. It's been going on a while . She's been frustrated for ages. She's the type of person who threatens to break up over any little argument. It's been a pattern of gets through all her past relationships and ours. I know she's only been voicing things that I've let slip and needed to work on. The thing is it's only been making me more insecure about the relationship and because I've been insecure about the relationship I've had trouble settling here and putting my roots down. Which is a another problem. I know I should have went all in on the relationship. * I forgot to add. Things started to change when I had an episode in work. I was really dizzy, and had blurry vision. I want to hospital but they couldn't find the cause. I found I couldn't do my job after that. I used to be a very fit guy and extremely strong. But his that episode I've lost all my strength and get tired so easily. Like some days I have no energy at all!
  10. My ex and I have sporadically kept in touch since we broke up in Dec. I officially broke up w/ him b/c our break-up was inevitable. He's moving to do his residency in NY (we lived in FL) and I asked him about out future and he told me he doesn't see us together and would not ask me to move w/ him. We had been dating a year at this point. he really wanted to remain friends, but I told him I needed time. he's kept in touch with me from overseas (he's been doing rotations in other countries and staying in NY for interviews) and now that he's back (3 mos later) he wants to hang out. I am not interested in him anymore- i've moved on, albeit still hurt. I feel okay w/o him, but probably b/c I accepted him leaving long before we broke up and I never got too close tp him-except towards the end both of us started to fall. I want to hang out w/ him b/c I do care for him deeply, but I'm afraid it might take me a few steps back. He's a great guy and fun to hang out with and he always wants me in his life. but I don't think that's healthy. i don't want to take steps back. He just wants to hang out as friends and I'd like that, but I don't know if I'm ready. right now, my feelings are closed off, but like has happened in the past, they might come rushing back when we see each other.
  11. My girlfriend and I have been together now for a little over 2 years. I can honestly say we have only really argued like 3 times in the past 2 years. Lately her best friend broke up with her b/f whom she had dated for about the same length as us. Well her friend started talking about how much fun it is being single again and my g/f wants to take a brek because of this. This is not the first time either, she also has another friend that cannot do much more than mess around with guys that has also tried persuaying her to "take a break" from me. How can I convince my g/f that its not a great idea? Also she seems to have a problem not knowing if other guys find her attractive, why this matters, i dont know, but I tell her all the time she is beautiful.
  12. i'm almost shaking too much to ... to type this.. i don't .. want to die.. but it's killing me to live like this.. i ... i can't live without my mikey. i can't live with everybody.. hating me... because i can't do any thing. i can't be with them, i can't be without them.. i can't even cut myself right now.. this knife's too dull... and i.. i don't want to.. but i dont' know what else to do.. please.. tell.. me .. what to do.. i'm sorry... i've... calmed down some now.. whew..... ok.... but when you're rocking back and forth, whispering to no one in particular, "dream with me baby" and begging, ..... you know there's something wrong with your head. heh. as for my m... heh. as for that guy. he... i supposedly spoiled his plans for seeing me, because my parents are butt holes, and won't let me see anyone from anywhere. that and this part i didn't tell him, i can't see him yet because i haven't had that ... weird.. "sexual reassignment" crap done yet. so... yeah. he got mad, because i can't go visiting him and whatever, i spoiled his plans. me. my fault. i'm trying to ... fix my body, i'm bleeding for him (yes, i'm a cutter, i'm not going to say it any prettier.) i'm crying for him, i'm doing everything i can to speed up the whole change process, and... he... frack. i'm just... blown away. he's mad at me. the only one i've ever loved so hard, so... much. and he just.. walks away. just tosses it away. for what? nothing. i'm sure he's just as hurt, but he doesn't understand ...why. i'm just.. at a loss as to where to go from here. i was living day to day based on him. when i'd see him next, what i'd do, where i'd go.. what i'd do after high school... i changed my entire life plan around just for him. i suppose this is heard here often, but i'm not used to it. i've only had one other bf before (both online.. yeah, real stable.) and.. he just left one day and never came back. so... that was a kick in the pants, let me tell you this. i just.. don't know what to do. i honestly felt like dying. still do, but with much MUCH more sarcasm. man... i just need some help with.... how to... deal with this garbage. and i dont' mean "breakup advice" because that's not where i want this to go.
  13. Here's my question. Is it better for your ex to tell you he needs a break from the relationship for a month or 2 and then to hear nothing from him still after a few weeks? Or if he says it's just not working out and I think we should be friends. Do people really take breaks from the one they love with N/C and then suddenly want to return to the relationship? Also the demeanor of the person who has done the breaking up. If that person has been different since.....in the words of his friends, "nervous and just not the same", is that a positive sign? Or if the "breaker" had really no intention of returning to the relationship, would he be as effected as if there was a possibility?
  14. have any dumpers out there assumed no contact after they broke up with their bf/gf on NOT bad terms? I know alot of ppl who GET dumped assume no contact to help get over it........... wondering if the DUMPERS also do this at times and WHY
  15. I have recently broken up with my girlfriend I now wake up and observe who I have become, and I don't like it. I'm quieter, more stuck up, less friendly, less interesting. I prefer the person I used to be. I feel like she has drained the life out of me... Anywayz... here I awake, this much more quiet person, less sociable, feeling pretty much dead and lonely. So how do I become again who I was, the louder and amusing entertainer? I've lost touch with many friends and those I have not lost touch with are mostly too busy. So how do I make new friends again, get that feeling of being completely free and return to that lovable, seducing and charming person I used to be, who always had too many parties to go to at once, a plan or three for the night and would be the person you would call when you wanted to have some fun? I want to love myself again... -
  16. Hi, My girl and I are breaking up. The main reason she gives for this is that "you'll be better off without me" and that she is "Sacrificing me so I can be happy". This makes no sense to me and is making me feel really upset. She has some emotional problems which I want to and have helped her with. My question is, can anyone help me to understand what she really means by this because i am so confused.....? many thanks.
  17. It is a part of life to change.....it is just one of the BIG inevitable parts of life that if you try to ignore or deny, you are gonna fail. "Roll with the punches" and "change with change" this issue of change is a struggle with me right now and I am seeking truth and reality to my feelings. I do believe that what is inside of me right now is my heart and soul trying to cope with change. More specifically, personal change. I am not the same as I was 1,2,3 or even 4 years ago! I have grown up radically....grown out of old behaviors, habits, and matured drastically. Life has givien me that gift. I have discovered so much about myself that it has casued me to build a great love for who I am as a person and now I just want the discovery to keep on going!! I am finally comfortable with who I am and I feel independent but, I am not ready to settle in with myself yet or anyone. I feel as if the world is my playground and I havent even ridden the swings yet or gotten to the monkey bars! Once I can get off of this merry-go-round I think I will see how much more fun the other rides can be too. WHen I say rides, I mean experiences. I have been wth my guy for 3 years now, that is a great achievement. IS it wrong to think its possible that I have gotten all I can from him and it is time to move on? I like the philosophy that "you encounter the significant people in your life for some reason, and that they are there for some reason etc...." LIke when someone close dies or just goes away, that is when you truly see the impact the person had on you and you see gift they left while they were a significant part of your life. When the time comes to break up with my guy, things will get put into perspective and life will go on. The hard part is breaking up after so long and after such an enourmous amount of love and effort that built the relationship....how does one go about this?? Why let it go? THis is part of my struggle. I am honest with my guy about my feelings....he in turn listens, but then seemingly tries too hard to make me happy and fill the void that my desires have created in the relationship. I have love for him, and i will always appreciate him, but I don't want to hurt him. ON the contrary, I feel like I am hurting him more by being with him and denying my heart. Any advice please.
  18. Hello, I've been seeing a girl for 4 months now. Here's the story. I met her 10 months after my ex of 3 yrs broke up with me. My new gf is great, but I don't see myself being with her long term. About one month into seeing the new girl, my ex found out about it and told me she sees me with her in the future. My ex broke up with me because she said she wasnt ready for a committment yet and she wanted to do her own thing for awhile. She promised me she hasn't been dating anyone while we were apart and had no plans to. I still talk to my ex over email and bottom line is I plain miss her. I'm just not sure what to do with my current gf, she has been nothing but great to me the whole time she's known me, but I just don't feel I could be around her 24/7 in the future. I'm afraid of hurting her feelings too, she will be very crushed, i know it. I could keep the relationship going, but i'd only be cheating myself, and leading her on. Thank you all for reading any suggestions are welcome
  19. I've become heartless, cold and angry, yet i don't know why, I got over a tough relationship with my ex girl and found myself angry. I was seeing other women after that but I could'nt care less about them. Lately at work i've been somewhat of an a..hole to my co-workers, I don't talk to the family much and don't really care much about my close friends problems. I know it's not because of the break up, I got over that, but I still feel like I failed as a man or a person in general, I'm unhappy with my life, I don't wanna be where I am, but i'm stuck, I support my sick parents financially, there are so many things I want and can't have, I feel alone but don't really want anyone in my life right now cause I don't wanna bring them down with me it's a dilemma I can't figure out, I know theres gotta be something I could do. I know i'm not depressed or in need of a shrink, I'm sure it's something simple...I hope
  20. This is a crazy situation by I need to vent. My ex girlfriend was a very loving, caring, hard working woman and we planned our future together and I was going to propose to her MAY 05, but July 20, 2004, 2 days after we celebrated our 4 year anniversary we decided that we would step back so that she could get herself together and bring as much to the table as I was. Well the next day she was picked up by someone from my past that had disrespected me, like my girl and who my girl was attracted to. This person was someone that I was in a relationship for a year,but it didn't work and I broke up with her. It hurt me to know that all the time that I was trying to compromise as far as them being friends that my girl of 4 years probably was cheating on me. I found out after the break up that they were talking on the phone all day and at odd times of morning. My ex of four yrs has been spending the night, taking trips and having sex with her and I told her that there is no way that we will ever get back together b/c she played me w/ someone that I had been with. I have moved out and am buying a house and I have progressed in my career, I still see her out at the clubs and arm and arm with my previous ex but she plays it off like they are not in a relationship and that she just needed a break from being in a relationship but to me she's acting like she is in one. She's not the same woman that I once loved and she hurt me....I do miss her but I don't want to ever talk to her or see her again. She has told people that we will get back together. There are times when I want to understand why she did this and then there are times when I really don't care and I wish that Karma would come now. She wants to be friends and call me and talk to me but I figure that she has lied, cheated and disrespected me to be where she is so she needs to go ahead and leave me alone. I just don't understand why she won't just leave me alone and forget that I ever existed, it would make things alot easier. What is it that she is thinking? Or is she not thinking at all?
  21. hey um i got dumped almost a month ago and here is a poem i wrote the other day about how i felt tell me what i should fix and what not lol enjoy!! .>!* As i sit here Alone All i think about is you I have no clue Couldn't you see i needed you I loved you I wished you were still my boo I'm differnt now My world is full of sadness I'll be full of happyness sometime But its your own miss I use to miss you so much My heart was broken But right now i just want to give you a punch You have moved on And so will I But right now I just want to eat a pie Ihope you realize what you left I'm not the best but i was the best i could ahve been And you acted like you were ten.tell me what u think of it !!!
  22. Here are the facts: 1. Went out on a 1st date 3 weeks ago - both of us had a great time (he confirmed this and also reiterated this to me a few times) 2. Both of us have been busy - we're in different grad school programs and last week was midterms - and have been unable to really connect again (or at least very limited communication - short phone calls or emails) 3. I had an evening planned with my buddies for Fri nite and invited him - he accepted and seemed to be looking forward to hanging out 4. Evening comes...he's stuck finishing a paper (took longer than he expected)....but he was going to finish and meet us 5. We already finished the 1st part of our evening (8:30PM now) and moved the party to a 2nd location - I call to check in and let him know. He apologizes for being so late and will meet us at 2nd location - asks if he can bring his buddy (of couse, no problem) 6. 2nd location....it is now 9:30 and he is not yet there....he calls says that he is done with paper and buddy is picking him up..will be at the location by 10PM (again apologies) 7. 10PM - still there at location (hmm....I am annoyed) and no phone call - but of course by this time, I am irritated and will not be bothered to call 8. 11PM - party breaks up...still no sign, no phone call. Girlfriends all say don't bother calling him...he's rude to not have checked in by now...so I don't call....and am fully annoyed 9. 11:20 he calls...says he's at the location but doesn't see me...I proceed to tell him that we've left...was not a byatch about it...just very matter of fact. He seems now very sheepish and rather uncomfortable. Apologizes again...and again....tells me that this is really not how he wanted it to turn out...he really wanted to see me...but his buddy that went to pick him up was in bad shape and needed to talk......blah blah blah...sorry sorry sorry...I tell him that I understand that things come up...but I didn't appreciate that he kept me waiting the entire time and did not bother calling me - that was rude. Told him that he's got some major points to score back..... 2nd chance? Do I make peace offering? What to do?
  23. We've been pretty good friends for a while, and ever since october or so we've started to get really really close. Like close to best friends. I thought I may have envisioned it going further so I asked her what she thought and she said she felt that way too and thought that in a while she'd want to be with me. So I waited and was patient. About two weeks later we started talking about it again and what she said was really weird. She said that she realized that she was wrong and that she could never go out with me because her good friend was my ex gf. Also, she said she just doesnt like me in that way. But see in those 2 weeks, things just got even better. It was better than it ever was before and I'm sure she felt that way too. So i got kind of upset for a little bit, but I didn't go off on her or anything. Then about two weeks ago her and this kid started going out. Now he's kind of my friend I guess, but he rarely talks. I would say he's good looking, and he's sort of like this cult hero lol, like everyone says he's so cool as a half joke (he actually is cool though). I was really upset when she told me. She told me before that she wasn't sure if he liked her for the right reasons so she wasn't sure if she wanted to go out with him. She told me that if I didn't want her to then she wouldn't for me, but even though I didn't, I said that I was ok with it because it would make her happy. Since then things have been horrible. I've basically ignored her and haven't made any attempt to talk to her. But, for some reason today I gave her an amazing bday present that she really loved. I almost didn;t want to give it to her for some reason. So 2 weeks ago she said she'd ask me if I wanted her to break up with him and if I did then she would. She's going to ask me soon and I don't know what to say. I don't even understand what is really wrong with our friendship. If I say no, I don't want you to break up, then I'm afraid our friendship will keep being horrible and I won't be able to talk to her. But, if I say yes I do, then I'm afraid she would hold it against me and I would take away someone that really makes her happy from her. She's said I mean so much to her, more than her bf, and she would do anything for me if it meant keeping our friendship... It is a predicament nonetheless..
  24. I have been on both sides of the breakup fence, and I can tell you it sucks. I was broken up with last year, and went through pure hell. I met a woman after being single for quite some time, and we began to get close. She pushed for things to move faster than I did, and it kind of scared me. I realized that I didn't want to lead her on or hurt her, so I had a talk with her. It really wrecked her, and this made me so sad. We never had a conversation about being exclusive, and I was still dating occasionally (We had been on about 5 dates). I went on a date with someone else and felt that spark that seemed to be missing here- It's ironic that someone can be the greatest person in the world, but if the spark isn't there, it's not there. I care very much for this girl, and called her to make sure she was OK the next day. She was sad, as am I. She told me that if I come to feel differently, that I should call her. I would like to be friends, but I know that isn't fair to her. Any thoughts?
  25. 3 days ago my boyfriend of one year broke up with me. It was out of the blue. our relationship was perfect up until this last week then he broke up with me. I just moved from Durango (where he lives and I graduated from) to Colorado Springs. It is a 5 hour drive and he didnt want a long distance realtionship. I had to move to get a job and I asked him that if I would have gotten a job there would he still have broken up with me and he said maybe. I feel so alon. I really love him and I told him that and I asked him why he didnt care about me enough to make this work and he said it was because he knew from the start that it would end when I left so he didnt let himself fall for me. the thing is I know he cares about me. when I went to mexico for a week he had texted me the night before I came home " I miss you, I need you, I want to touch you and be with you. please get home soon so I can see you." he would text me and say this stuff to me all the time. everyone who met him told me how much they saw how much he cared about me. my dad thinks its becasue its no longer convienent for him. I think he still loves me but he can't admit it to me or himself. I think he is scared of me because our reltionship was actually really good and a;; his past realtionships were bad with tons of fighting. I know that if we were in the same town and I had a job we could be together and be really happy. both of us. someone please tell me how to get him back. I took some advise that was posted on here and I am not going to contact him for a while but I need some advice. I really think he is the one. please help
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