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About Me

  1. I wish I was pretty. At school all my friends are drop dead gorgeous. Everyone has changed their look coming back prettier than ever, while I have looked the same for basically all my life. Sometimes my friends say that I'm pretty when I self-doubt myself. But I don't think it's true. Every morning I look into the mirror and see all the things wrong with my face. My face is too long, my nose has a huge bump on it, my eyes are to far apart, I have too much acne. I hate everything about it. My cousin is extremely pretty and I always wish I looked like her. My sister is so pretty and always gets compliments. I'm a person who always preaches self love and confidence when I actually have none. I'm always wearing a sweater even on the hottest summer days because I dislike the way my arms look. I want to pretty like the others. I wish I had enough confidence to post on instagram. I wish I didn't always delete every photo I took of myself.
  2. I was giving my partner oral sex, he was moaning as if he was into it, and then he pauses and starts talking about a female we both know, he noticed wasn’t at an occasion we were just at. he first said i don’t think it’s the right time to say this, then proceeded to say it anyway. I stopped oral and got quiet. took a while to process everything. is my partner just not into me? why is my partner stopping oral pleasure to mention this? am i in the wrong for being uncomfortable? should i just let it go?
  3. So I’ve been doing research into how to improve my self esteem. I came across a “celebrity therapist” and hypnotherapist named Marisa Peer. She has a lot of videos on YouTube and has done Ted talks etc. Her theories seem to make so much sense but I’m struggling with her claim that she has transformed severely ill patients after a few sessions by treating the 3 core causes of their issues, rather than the symptoms of their depression etc. I have been trying out one of her practices for the last few days and I’ve got to say, I do feel a lot better and that’s making me consider purchasing one of her courses (she has free short ones I could trial I think). I can’t find much evidence of her being a therapist etc as google searches come up with mostly her videos and website but her courses etc have been reviewed with high ratings on blogs etc. So I’m wondering if anyone here has tried her courses etc and could vouch for her or say actually she’s a self inflated phony? I know the few reviews I’ve found on blogs are good but I’m skeptical, they could have been given it for free and felt obligated to give it a good review. Thanks
  4. 2019 wasn't the best of my life, alone and at peace today, doing my own stuff for quite some months. This is a 6 months update on how am coping with anxiety, getting things right with my life. A relationship which i felt was going to be best for me & her turned out to be a very bad mistake. It was a never to be a relationship in the end, something i really shouldn't have put myself into without verifying facts and knowing well the person am getting involved with. Boundaries were crossed, i lost respect for myself in the end. While getting through it i started developing lot of self pity, lost my self esteem, self worth, confidence, always looked down upon myself, ashamed of my behaviour, developed very bad anxiety issues, caused truck loads of other health issues. there wasn't a day where i wouldn't wake up, look in the mirror, feel sorry and sick of the person i had become. I wished for the day to end soon but another day was waiting with everything repeating , an infinite loop. Spoke a lot about it in the forums, many good souls here really helped me look at it from a different perspective, still something was keeping me hooked on to the pain and memories. And then one day the therapist happened. To be continued...:)
  5. I just don't understand it and it's really frustrating. It's been happening WAY too often lately, but everytime I talk to a girl either from Tinder or someone I meet in person we exchange a number of texts talking and getting to know each other with some flirting going on between both of us. But as soon as I make plans with them they agree to it, but then boom they cancel usually the day we're supposed to get together or literally a few hours before. They ALWAYS hit me with the excuse of "oh sorry not feeling well tonight" or some crap like that. I just assume they're out with their friends or hanging out with a different guy instead, so I quickly lose interest and stop messaging them; in which kills the communication entirely because they don't ever send a message to reschedule. It's strange because they seem genuinely interested at first talking to me. In the past 2 weeks I've had a total of 4 girls cancel on me all with similar excuses, and I just don't know what to do or what I'm doing wrong. I have a friend who is very successful and hardly ever has females cancel on him. Not going to lie but it's kind of hurting my confidence and self esteem, and giving me a pessimistic mentality of "what's the point of talking to this next girl, she'll just cancel like the others". Any advice?
  6. Broke up with my first boyfriend years ago, it affected me a lot because he has a "type" and I can't help but compare myself to the new women he may be dating. We remained friends (no longer) for a while and I recall this conversation that I go over and over in my head; Him: She never texts me but I'm just trying to respect her space Me: She must be damn hot or something for you to still try and work things out despite her ignoring you for weeks like that Him: She IS hot...... I am definitely still in love with him and these thought I'm afraid are becoming crippling to my self esteem. Should I try and make arrangements to speak to a conselor about this? Has Anyone else experienced this?
  7. Sooo, long story short I was in a relationship for 7 years and he cheated on me multiple times. Now that I’m out of the relationship it’s been about two years already. I have some dating sites and there’s this guy that wants to meet me but I feel like he is way out my league. Everytime I try to meet someone new I find something so I won’t go. I know I have a low confidence and self esteem but I just can’t help it I been like that for years and it’s hard to come out of it. I have talked to my friends and they tell me I’m crazy that I’m pretty that I need to stop thinking so negatively about myself. When they give me a compliment I find a way to justify why I look the way I do. I was bullied since I was in middle school and it has caused so emotional damage to me. I feel like having low confidence has set me back but i really don’t know how to help myself. I get on moods were I just cry and cry but then get up and tell myself I will be okay even though I don’t feel that at that moment.
  8. Story of my life is that I’m really ugly. 16 female. I haven’t had any normal teenage experience, a boy has never glanced my way, and u may be like oh you are so young but I feel like I’m going to be alone forever or have settle in a bad relationship. I can’t even take pictures. People pull out their phones all the time and without a thought just snap a pic. Maybe it’s not “instagram worthy” but they are still stunning and here I am, having never even went on my camera app except when taking pictures of other things other than me. They say find your angle and lighting but what happens when u don’t have an angle, when your face is so ugly nothing helps. This puts me in a pit of depression. It’s not even like oh you are average or whatever, it’s like every feature I have is the wrong one, I have a big forehead that makes my hairline look like it’s receding, small brown eyes, big bunny wide meaty nose, big unshapely lips, square head which isn’t very flattering on girls, my teeth are straight but I have tint gaps on my upper teeth, been told skin was too dark been called ugly a lot in my childhood and it still happens now expect people disguise it in jokes and I can’t point out how much it hurt because then I’m not fun. I feel hopeless I know I can’t change my face at least without surgery but I don’t know if I can ever get to a place where I am content. I need help
  9. Hello, this is my first post here and not sure in the right place. I am in my mid twenties and I have a big problem with building relashionships. I think my biggest failure is communication and low confidence. I can barely be present inside groups of people. I have always this feeling that they are better than me and that I can be forgoten in the group and not heard because I deserve it. I really feel so sorry that people do not get to see my true perdonality as I get trapped in emotions and nervous when around people. But dont get me wrong I have a good bavkground in every topic of conversations, I have a great personality to bring in, I read, I am a kind person, and I have a good career. I just font know how to show all of this in public. I am scared. Later every time I get alone I think about how much I had to talk about that topic where I barely said a word in a conversation. I also do have very low self esteem. How can I help myself? Help me guys please! Any suggestion will be welcomed! I would modtly like to work on myself by myself than seeing a councellor. Thank you!
  10. I (28F) am really conflicted as I have been struggling to move on from a guy (29M) I was seeing for only 2 months (!!!), 1 year ago. Things were going reallllllly really well. e chemistry and connection was like nothing I'd experienced in my life and he felt the exact same way, so our time together, when it was good was extra nice. He was a very cold person with a big front, but when we were together all those walls came down and I'd see a completely different person who could be so loving and kind. Unfortunately the following occured during this time- He would blow hot and cold and it was hard to deal with. He'd also get into moods where he would put me down jokingly. His ex girlfriend was still a good friend of his, which was fine with me as I am good friends with my exes, however she could be very possessive of him and put me down to him a lot (i.e., when we were spending time together she wanted to visit to borrow something and he told her he was with me and he responded saying 'your tinder date can wait'). He made no effort to defend me and constantly excused her behaviour. I tried to discuss this with him and he didn't seem interested in talking about it or offering any reassurance. Considering we were only in the early stages of dating and not his actual girlfriend, I didn't push it further. He had a previous history of heavy drinking and a benzo addiction, which he expressed he had moved on from. I felt that he wasn't being honest considering previous behaviours of his before we dated seriously which were only a year prior, indicating little time for full recovery (on our first date a year before we started seeing each other, he showed up wasted and took me to a bar where his ex hung out, she was there and sabotaged our date by constantly chatting to him with her friends, he reached out a year later blaming this on his alcoholism and benzo use) One day he was in a mood and I got fed up and I told him that I didn’t appreciate him speaking to me the way he did and in response he said that he’s a jerk and is going to get 100 x jerkier the more I know him (especially when he drinks) so it probably isn’t going to work out, but he will most likely regret breaking it off because he liked me heaps and didn't think he was capable of having an interest in someone like he did with me. He then went on to tell me that I am quite a sensitive person and he needs to be with a girl who will put him back in his place when he acts up. We agreed to stay friends and he'd sometimes indicate that he wanted to give it another shot, saying he probably will never be able to lose his attraction to me, but then would back out and pull away. Things got pretty sour fast, mainly with him getting irritable with me and eventually he told me he is done talking to me and doesn't want anything to do with me and he cut me off from there. Two months after this, he messaged me telling me he was truly sorry for everything and that even though it is no excuse, he was in a bad place and that he was a ‘pig’. At that point I felt I had well and truly moved on, especially considering how unpleasant he was with me during our last interaction, so I politely told him that I appreciate his apology and wished him all the best. Unfortunately with his last message, I experienced all these feelings return and I tried to wait it out. This didn't last long and I reached out a couple of months later. He seemed keen to know what I was up to and wanted to be friends, but when I told him I still had feelings for him he pulled back entirely said that we should block all contact so we can give each other some peace and that he 'hopes we cross paths again one day', from there he stopped talking to me altogether and blocked me. I'm ashamed to say that nearly a whole year passed with a lot of struggle trying to move on, mainly with this intense shame for pushing him away to the point where he felt the need to block me. I felt repulsive and felt that he held very low opinion of me after thinking highly of before it got so ugly (before all of this, he'd tell me that he'd never been so attracted to anyone before, that he thought I was amazing, that he couldn't hold any interest in other women for a year after meeting me because I was always at the back of his mind) . I tried to distract myself anyway possible and took on a whole new career, made many new friendships, developed new hobbies, dated heaps and gone through lots of therapy, but he still didn't really escape my mind. About two months ago I noticed on my messenger that he had unblocked me entirely, after a few weeks trying to put it out of my mind, I got in touch to tell him that If he doesn’t want to speak to me, to tell me upfront – but I miss knowing him and still feel confused about everything that happened. He responded saying ‘I woke up to my friend dead and am dealing with that at the moment. I’m getting lots of messages and I think I might delete messenger x’. I told him that I am very sorry to hear of his situation, that I hope he’s coping ok and told him that he’s welcome to reach out to me if he feels the same way I do and wants to talk about it further. He responded saying ‘thank you x’. I added that the timing is obviously off, but to know that I'd rather be told if he isn't interested, rather for it to be left open and he left me on read. In that time I saw him show up on my tinder and he didn't like me back. A month has passed since this last interaction and pretty much everyone I know has told me that that was just him letting me down and it was a clear rejection, however I somehow feel like he was just leaving things open until it is a better time? I wrote in on another forum and was berated for harassing this guy and that he needs a restraining order against me, so I am feeling pretty awful about that. Would anyone have some supportive insights into this to share?
  11. Hello. I am a 20 year old male. I'm in a place in my life right now where I am really stuck and my life feels like a hell. For the past 7 years I have been suffering from severe acne that has left many marks and holes all over my body, especially on my face, back, chest, shoulders and arms. This, combined with a pretty low self-esteem and a negative body image has made me really depressed. I didn't really have friends in high school and I don't now either. I am in my 2nd year of college. However, the thing that bothers me the worst is this girl from my class that I can't get out of my head. I've been crushing so hard on her from the first day of college. I know that this sounds silly, but I just can't talk to her. When it comes to sex & relationships, I am very insecure and I hate myself and the way I look. Regarding acne, I have seen dermatologists and they have been able to stop my acne but not my huge and very ugly scars. I just can't find strenght in myself to just do it. I just don't know What to do. When I look in the mirror all I see is a disgusting human being that doesn't deserve to be loved. I have tried to talk to my parents about this but they never take me seriously or they try to deny my problems even if I tell them that it bothers me and it causes me suffering. I am just afraid that I will never be able to confess what I feel to this girl and that I will never fulfill my dreams in life because of this self hatred stuff. In my case, I don't think it's just a mental issue, because I actually have a reason or maybe multiple ones to hate myself. I don't want my life to be filled with suffering and regret anymore but I don't know what to do since I absolutely hate myself and I don't have any backbone or self-confidence. There are days when I just come home from school and start crying because I can't confess my feelings to her and I see her with other dudes. She has shown interest in the past but I haven't been able to do anything about it. It wouldn:t be so hurtful if I was able to talk to her and even if she would have rejected me it would have been fine. I just regret not being able to truly live my life and be able to love and have fun and fall in love with someone I really like.
  12. Hi all. Just wondering what others have done to help them heal? I know the usual ‘gym, new hobbies, etc etc’ But I’m talking more about self esteem. Heck everyone’s self esteem gets knocked after a breakup. But how do you heal self esteem? How do you put together the little pieces that have been chipped away? There’s no manuals for this? No instructions!
  13. Hi everyone, I'm in a bit of a transition stage in my life at the mo and to cut a long story short I've moved in with my mum for a few months while I get money together for a house deposit and find a decent place. We have always had a strained relationship but it has gotten better in recent years. When I was growing up she was very critical of me and made daily comments about how I looked, especially my weight. I have carried a bit extra for most if my life except for a couple of stages where I lost an extreme amount of weight in extreme ways. I have recently put some weight back on and now fall into the 'overweight category which has made me feel quite bad about myself but she is treating me as if I'm morbidly obese and is making me feel so disgusted with myself and ashamed of what I see when I look in the mirror. I feel myself losing confidence, which I worked so hard to build, and slipping back into old habits like buying diet pills, skipping meals, obsessing over exercise and taking heavy detox drinks etc. I feel so terrible about myself I genuinely feel like a teenager again. Every day these past few weeks she has made negative, nasty digs about how I've "let myself go" and "need to get back on track". I know it sounds silly but I just feel so low right now and every comment from her eats away at my self-esteem a little more. I know parents should challenge you to be your best self but she ignores everything except my appearance and I only ever hear negative words come from her mouth. This can't be right??
  14. Not sure if this is the right place to post - my apologies in advance! I currently work in the same university from which I graduated a few years ago. I also received my graduate degree there. There was a professor I had once in undergraduate and once in graduate school. He is beloved and a great teacher - confident, empowering, tough but teaches great lessons. He is currently 72 years old (married with children and grandchildren) and still teaches occasionally in the graduate program. He occasionally made comments to me and other girls about our appearance. Nothing crazy - "you look beautiful" type of things. We always got along well and would talk after class or on campus once I became an employee. I was a very good student and he would talk to me about papers I had written and we would share educational conversations. Fast forward to present day and he is in town (he now lives in another state) for a class he is teaching. He calls my office and asks if I would like to catch up after his night class over coffee or a drink. I see nothing wrong with it and agree. He then suggests the restaurant at his hotel. Something about that made me uncomfortable so I suggest somewhere closer to campus, he rebukes my suggestions and instead picks a loud popular bar at a midway point between the campus and his hotel. His class ends at 8pm, we agree to meet at 8:30. Once there we sit and order drinks and appetizers. Conversation proceeds normally for about 25 mins - work, school, life (I am in the middle of a divorce), etc. He starts suggesting we go somewhere more quiet to which I respond that we should just stay there because I have to be at a campus function early the next morning. He then recommends getting a bottle of champagne and going back to his room. This is where things go downhill. I decline and tell him that is not going to happen for xyz reasons - most of all that he is married and my morals would never allow it. I should have left at that point but I was caught off guard, not sure how to handle the situation, and I really am avoiding making a scene - all stupid reasons, I know. He then says he respects my decision and at that point our food arrives. Conversation proceeds normally again and I start to feel fine with the situation - he asked, I said no, everything was ok - I was wrong again. Shortly thereafter he tells me he has been infatuated with me since I was in his first class. He recalled things I wore, a coat I owned, specific sentences I wrote in papers. He asks if we could do anything at all that night. I decline again. He claims to never have done this before (I find that hard to believe), claims that students have come on to him and he has refused them (I again do not believe him but that is besides the point) Admittedly, I was flattered. I am coming out of a 15 years relationship where I was never once made to feel smart, beautiful, or wanted. And, although he is not who I wanted to be hearing it from, it was jarring to hear it said all the same. After a little while more i tell him we are leaving to our respective homes and that whatever he thought was going to happen is not going to happen. He remarks that now he is even more intrigued by me. We leave to the parking lot and he proceeds to walk after me to my car. I walk so quickly my shoe breaks. He spins me around to face him and holds both of my arms to my sides as he attempts to kiss me. I pull away and he asks if he can get in my car. I say no, I get in my car and drive away. This happened two weeks ago. Although nothing technically happened I am still shaken by it. I am upset with myself for not leaving at his first request. I am upset with myself for being flattered at his comments towards me. I feel my behavior towards him could be interpreted as flirtatious. It was a bad combination of being with someone I always looked up to professionally, wine, a lack of self confidence, and never experiencing a feeling of being desired by my husband all wrapped into one. I think I am more upset with my behavior than I am with his. I am sad that perhaps he saw my lack of self confidence and thought I would be an easy target and that's why he chose me. My question is this: am I victim-shaming myself? how do I get passed this? I feel silly sometimes because nothing technically happened. I can handle a dirty conversation - but being grabbed like that was scary, and my arm still hurts. I have learned from the situation, but I still blame myself for so much and am not sure how to reconcile all of it. Thank you for reading.
  15. Hi there, My partner and I have been together for ten years now, and are yet to have sex. We are both committed to each other, and love each other very much. This issue has been very hard to deal with for a long time now. My self confidence is always shot, and paranoia always takes over, but we have both been faithful to each other this whole time. I don't want to sound like that is all I want from this relationship, because if that were true, I would have moved on a long time ago, but it is a step I want for the both of us. But she has no interest. When we are intement, (which is very rare, maybe once every two months or so) she gets scared when we try. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to tell her it's a healthy part of a relationship without feeling like I'm trying to pressure her, because I am not. Any help would be greatly appreciated
  16. I met him around my birthday off of Bumble. He is very kind, great sense of humor and wonderful personality. We've seen each other quite a bit. I met his family tonight at a birthday event I was invited too. Everything feels so natural and I'm genuinely happy. I've dated lots of wrong guys before as you all know! Heck was even in a relationship with one for a decade three years ago. I always had poor judgement when it came to guys not because I picked the bad guys on purpose. It just was me never having good self esteem or self confidence that I latched onto whomever. I took a break for several months and focused on what it is I really need and my own personal wants. My big thing is getting healthy and losing weight. It still is, the funny thing though is I'm doing that subconsciously. I'm making healthier choices and working out. I thought I needed to lose all the excess weight before I found a guy to date. But on Bumble I signed up not expecting much but still wanting to leave it open to finding someone regardless. I learned with the last guy I dated that being overweight or thin the guy has to want me and accept me for me! I swiped right on this guys profile and sent him a quick hello. Then it took off from there. I feel in my gut I've found a good guy. Everything comes natural and he embraces me. He doesn't mind I don't drive or other 'setbacks' he's truly given me a chance because he likes me. I can tell him all the good and bad with my mental illness and he won't run off or judge. If you remember the last thread about how it ended with that guy who wouldn't sleep with me because of my weight? This guy finds me attractive and isn't trying to change me, he wants to be intimate. He just makes me really happy! sorry I'm rambling..I don't have any questions or seeking advice. I just wanted to share.
  17. It seems like I have struggled with self esteem forever, as long as I can remember (I am 24/F). I remember feeling low self worth since I was 4 years old. I always feel like I do not measure up. It's difficult to make friends or form solid connections because it always feels like the way I interact with people is as if they are better then me. It comes out in my communication, I usually act nervous around new people or have trouble making eye contact, I speak to them in a way that is as if they are better than me. I just assume everyone is, and I am also an avid people pleaser which has gotten me into trouble. My lack of self esteem has also allowed me to stay in negative relationships with friends and romantically. With all this being said, I am definitely better than what I was a few years ago. I feel like I have grown a lot in the last year through some serious depression I've struggled with. I see the world in a new light as I am becoming less naïve, but I cannot shake the low self esteem. I now know that self esteem is far more than looks - it's being assertive, saying no without having to explain yourself, decision making, walking away from bad situations, etc. I know what it means to have a healthy self esteem, no matter what I do, I cannot find techniques to improve mine and cannot afford therapy right now. I have no problem with self care - like cooking meals, treating myself and taking care of my body. I am getting better at accepting my flaws physically but my lack of self esteem mostly shows in the way I communicate with others with the notion that everyone is better than me and asserting myself. Any suggestions or techniques? I have been looking into CBT (Cognitive Behavioural therapy) but having trouble putting some exercises into practice.
  18. I've been with my partner for 18 months and In that time he's had a few issues with self esteem, thinking hes not good enough and compares himself to others, when he gets deep into these feelings he shuts me out, wont see me, break contact with me and then when he does have contact its him saying we need to end cus its the kindest thing to do, set me free, I finally get through to him and he comes out of it, sometimes it takes longer than other times, I can't walk away from him, I love him so much and walking would be an unkind thing to do, I'm at my wits end at the moment cus it's happening again! All I know is I want to spend the rest of my life with him, I keep telling him I can't stop fighting for him and let him set me free, help!
  19. I've been with my partner for 18 months and In that time he's had a few issues with self esteem, thinking hes not good enough and compares himself to others, when he gets deep into these feelings he shuts me out, wont see me, break contact with me and then when he does have contact its him saying we need to end cus its the kindest thing to do, set me free, I finally get through to him and he comes out of it, sometimes it takes longer than other times, I can't walk away from him, I love him so much and walking would be an unkind thing to do, I'm at my wits end at the moment cus it's happening again! All I know is I want to spend the rest of my life with him, I keep telling him I can't stop fighting for him and let him set me free, help!
  20. For those who have/ever had experience with low self esteem, how do you cope with it? I have been battling lowSE lately and it affects my daily life constantly. I feel low about myself as a person(my character and traits) and about my social situation. I got out of a relationship that triggered this problem. I sometimes feel there is no way out of it because although my reason kinda sees the things rationally(that I have no big reason to have such a very low self esteem) my heart feels totally opposite. What are some tips for fighting it and how should I see this problem? Share your experience with me. Thank you in advance!
  21. Chronic illness is like thief that comes in the night. It steals from you. It robs you of your friends, your job, your self worth, self esteem, your social life and leaves you feeling that IT has all the power and you have almost no control over your life anymore. I am a spiritual person and do alot of praying. I never thought I would find myself in this situation. For the first 50 years of my life, I was very healthy and active. I had a job, a great social life, a boyfriend, and life was wonderful. Then I woke up one day with a migraine that became so bad, I went to the emergency room. After that night, my life changed forever. I recovered from the migraine, thankfully, but I began to experience atypical facial pain. Not to bore you with a long story of how the last 13 years have radically changed, but I know that living day to day with a chronic illness is not easy, especially when you don't have a great support system in place, I would love to hear from those on that are on this forum to share their experience and how you deal with something like this. Thank you for listening. :-)
  22. Hi, I’m new here, and in a very dark place. Just when my life was coming together in late 2015, it fell apart so badly that counselors I’ve seen are in shock and upset for me. I’m trying to put the pieces back together. One bad thing was that I had two dates with a guy in 2013, saw red flags and chose not to see him anymore. Well, two years ago, after I moved on, he filed a lawsuit against me for intentional infliction of emotional distress. Then he had two of his friends lie, guys I never even met, and they filed lawsuits too. So I’m on good stamps, can’t get a job because they keep telling prospective employers bad stuff about me, and I’m now fighting three lawsuits! No lawyer wants to help. I gave one my last $20,000 and the lawyer got all nasty with me, called me names, and said he’s on their side, then told them where I live. Now, before the lawsuits, police would help me, and I even got a full legal name change. But now police keep saying its civil, even with the one guy making death threats and that he threatened to make my life hell a few days before he and his friends filed lawsuits. The guy and his lawyers are vicious- the lawyers laughed at said no lawyer would help me because I’m scum and they told the one bad lawyer I had the same. I realized last night how much it has affected me. I was at an event for crime victims, and the lady from Legal Aid said that when I tell my story, I build their defense for them. I see that they have conditioned me to have low confidence. Then, this guy has caused me to investigates with a crime that the video proves I did not commit, and I have trial in a few weeks. Never even had detention in school, so this has destroyed my confidence too. The video only recently worked but the prosecutor won’t dismiss the case because he is mad that for two years I refused to plea guilty. So he said he is going to call people who hate me to testify against me. I like my lawyer for this case, and am hopeful the video will redeem me. With all of the bad above, I felt terrible about myself and took up with a very broken man. He is a narcissist, and I had a former friend who is a psychiatrist, who met him and confirmed to me that he is a narcissist. Anyway, I discarded the narcissist and let him have all of his “friends”, and he sent one to vandalize my house last Christmas. It’s on video but police won’t do anything. The narcissist stalks and harasses me, but never directly. He will prank me from spoofed numbers (perfect form of triangulation) and blocked me on Facebook on Valentines Day, but has all kinds of fake profiles he tries to get info with. He hacks my accounts and even has a motorized parachute and drone to stalk me- random people have confirmed it too. My house is very distinctive, and I was at the doctors, and the nurse told me she sees the parachute and drone always over my house. The gas station attendants even tell me the same thing. I haven’t spoken to the guy in months..., trying to wait til I’m free of the criminal case to go after him criminally. For months, I feel like I need to get rid of either the lawsuits or the ridiculous frivolous criminal case in order to move on. I feel stuck. How can I raise my confidence? I’m so disgusted with myself.
  23. A friend of mine has been going through a rough time lately and not feeling good about himself. He's always had some Facebook posts where he's referred to himself in the 3rd person, but he's doing it a lot more lately. Also, he posted a long story about an experience he had and uncharacteristically used a lot of profanity. He's in his 50s and I believe has low self esteem. What's with the weird behavior?
  24. Hello everyone! As the title of my thread suggests, it's a very common problem and I rather feel ashamed to discuss it with anyone, so I came here for some support I am 31 and a single woman. Due to problems associated with body image during my teens, I have always suffered from a low self-esteem and for that reason, I have always ended up being in relationships with people who treated me like sh**. Long story short, I have always been dumped by both my ex boyfriends (after 6 years and then after 2 years). I always thought there might be some problem with me and tried to work hard building my self-esteem, ate well, exercised, became professionally sound, etc. After a gap of three years, I decided to date again and found a man online. He was 36 years of age and single. Like everyone, he had a story to tell (broken family, he dumped his ex gf of 5 years because of borderline personality and it became too much for him to handle, etc. I avoided questioning him about his past as I couldn't see any other major red flags). As usual, he was very sweet and considerate in the beginning. We met a few times. There are some big differences between us (race, religion, nationality, political views, etc.) I brought these things up in the beginning, and he said he loves me so much that he really doesn't care. After 4 months, I had to move to a new city for my job and I told him that it might not work because of the distance. He said distance is relative, and promised me that he will wait for me (I am to return to my city after 6 months). In the meanwhile, we had been planning to meet for Christmas, to which he readily agreed. For the past three weeks, however, he started pulling away (usual behavior and I was prepared that a breakup might be coming soon) so I told him that communication is essential to make a long-distance relationship work and that I feel lonely, etc. He said it's a non-issue, and the real issue is that I come from a different race, religion, political viewpoint (I am liberal and he's far-right and extremely anti-refugee, anti-immigration and we have had arguments related to that but never fought), I have a different level of sociability, so we should not proceed. I said I brought these things up in the beginning, but he kept pointing out differences and said it's not going to work. I told him it's alright and although I am hurt, I respect his decision and then stopped contacting him. Now he's sending me messages again and again, asking me how am I doing, and other random stuff. I am already hurt and did not create any drama (although there were so many things I wanted to say, I didn't say a word). Should I send him a message saying that I don't want him to contact me again or just leave things as it is (without sending messages)? P.S. I feel ashamed of myself for not being able to deal with this at this age, but I don't know what to do Thanks!
  25. I'm going to cut the story short. At 17, I had a baby. At 19, he was taken away by social services. Unjustly, because I have borderline personality disorder and I ended an abusive relationship 5 months before they took him. I had never harmed him, I breastfed him until the day they took him. (23 months). He was forward, clever, happy, well dressed, content. Every report says this. But they took him anyway. He now lives with my sister and will until he is 18. He's about to turn 5. Since this, my self confidence has gone. I don't want to get a job because I can't face people; I hate leaving the house because I am so embarrassed. I see him almost every day which is a positive... but I have nothing else to live for. If he was adopted by other people, I would have ended my life, no questions asked. I still feel like ending my life. But my baby stops me. I know it would hurt him, and he would eventually blame himself. I want to be better, I want to fix my life. I know he can never come home. But I look in the mirror and I feel ugly. I feel unwell every single day, I can't wake up in the mornings and I can't remember the last time I wasn't tired. I have no income whatsoever as the DWP closed my claim because I couldn't get to a medical assessment. I have literally nothing. How am I supposed to keep living like this? I can't get a job because I left school early due to mental health problems, interviews are enough to make me relapse and self harm because I'm so stupid and embarrassed by everything. No where would take me on. I have nothing in life. No confidence. No self esteem. No money. No desire to live. How do I pull myself out of this rut? I am seeing a psychotherapist that my mum pays for (£40 a bloody hour!!!) but it's not working.
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