robowarrior
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Everything posted by robowarrior
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Let him go, your better off without him. In the future think 30 times before you do something. This because searching for fortune in a hastly manner, can lead to much mischieve into your life. *hugs* this must be so hard for you, i think its best to stay out of relationships for at least 3/4 of a year, in this period get a shrink and go into theraphy for all the awfull things that have happened to you. And let your shrink re-evaluate where you did go wrong in your thinking, you also need to do a lot of self reflection as to what point he or you went wrong.
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If i where you i would start reflecting on the things that you really value as important, i think that in terms of dating it might be as hard as finding a needle in a haystack. So you really have to find a gathering place for singles. Also how are your children dealing with it? Did you discuss the situation, how do they feel about all of this? I mean you could invite a woman in your life, but it also more or less needs to be nice for the kids, who may have substantial doubts on all what is going on. thereforeeee what is important is that you find a wonderfull new wife, and not a horrible woman who ruins your life or is just after your money. Being alone isn't nice but it could create a reasonable stable situation, if you bring someone in your house , remember that person could bring baggage with them, so be very carefull what you bring into your house, you don't want more problems then you already have.
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O my God, your telling me he left you after 2 weeks of marriage *gives hug of infinity* Your off to a shrink and a parental care institution. The divorce page link removed should provide you with some information on how to get rid of him, however the question remains do you want to get rid of him? I mean you guys have been 5 years together, wasn't he able to determine long time before that that he didn't want to marry with you? I mean he knew you where pregnant, personally i think he might felt asif he was forced into a marriage after you two found out that you where pregnant. Anyway check how you can get custody over your child, along with the divorce. Do as much research as you can and in terms of lawyers they are very pricey, so only use them at the moments they are absolutely neccesary. There's way too much going on in your life at this moment. There are important things that you need to protect. -yourself.(in terms of your emotional mental health) -your financial situation. -your child. You are in a very fragile situation, and you should take strong means to defend yourself,your baby and your emotional situation.
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Meeting new people after breakup!...Help Please!
robowarrior replied to krnelson2's topic in Dating Advice
No, i don't think you processed your previous relationship yet. Are you honestly ready to move on? Its something i definitly encourage you to do so. But not before you gave yourself time to heal and glued back the broken pieces of your heart. In the future you shouldn't go into a relationship expecting things will work out just because it concerns your case. Reality is that a girl can pick up her bags and leave any day. You just have to put your daring shoes on and go for it, its not creepy, it shows confidence, whats important now is that you don't be your own worst enemy by stopping yourself. Go for gold in your life, and just talk to girls you meet. -
Hit the gym, meet new people, solve puzzles, play chess, go grab a pencil and draw art, there's soo many things that you can do if you just have a get up n go attitude. =)
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You shouldn't have went into the relationship expecting everything to work out just because it concerned your case, reality is that a girl can pack her bags and leave anyday. Its perfectly normal what your going thru in that sense that you are simply blinded by love, i advice to you that if she doesn't care for you that you close yourself to her emotionally, replace her with a new girlfriend once you mend your broken heart and took the time to heal before moving on.
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I honestly don't know why people are so insecure about, strangly everyone seems to be complaining, myself however i have never ever suffered from insecurity in my life because i have a totally different view on it. Can you control another person? NO, so is it worth worrying about? No. Does it matter then if you are insecure about this or that? NO, so trash it. Just go for gold in your life. You can only control those things that you are in power of, and worrying about things that are beyond your control is pointless, this because you can only love a person, you can't own them. If your bf cheats on you, you dump him. If you are devoted to him, and he is devoted to you, then you can stay together. If i set a goal in my life, i will reach it or die while trying. You have to pre-define what you want in life, then go for gold in trying to reach it. Then you have zero reason to be insecure off. And why would you have to be jealous? If another person has a zillion cars, billion dollars and plenty o houses be happy for her. That you waste time on watching how the grass is greener at your neighbours is time you could have invested to make the grass greener in your own yard. So this whole jealousy,insecurity non-sense would be best thrown in the trashcan, and taken away to the dumpyard where it belongs,as they are nothing more then useless traits to begin with.
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Rebound Relationships...what do they mean?
robowarrior replied to krnelson2's topic in Getting Back Together
5 years is too long to call yourself a rebound. The bottomline is: YOU DONT WANT TO BE WITH A LIAR! She cheated on you big time, and what does this mean on the long run? Well , you deserve to be nr.1 in life, and you are not longer her nr.1. So its best if you separate her. Emotionally that's a terrible thing to go thru, but in the end its important to understand that its the right thing to do. Show some spine and dump her. Then replace your ex with someone who DOES consider you as her nr.1 in life. Don't take any less for granted. -
I don't know how you have been searching but there are actually tons of threads like this. You have been friend-zoned. You are an emotional tampon or crutch for her to lean on , as she said she came to you with her problems, and she loves to date men who treat her like trash. Since you are still falling for the classical problems i offer you the Don Juan bible link removed on the page scroll down, and learn how you need to prevent getting friendzoned.
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Its actually the guy who doesn't want to scare you away. Consider yourself as a guy for a moment and see it from his point of view. Nowadays if a guy goes too fast, the girl will think ' oh he's only interested in sex' if a guy would moan over the phone everyone would go 'omg pervert' but when a girl moans over the phone you'd have to pay 1$ a minute for it. So as you can see, a guys actions often can go unappreciated, which is why guys take a safe distance to first perceive if its alright to intrude into this girls life.
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My best friend is a snake. -Need Help
robowarrior replied to SuperDuper's topic in Friendship and Friends
I would just say keep the 200$ you own me and get out of my life. Honestly the horror and nightmare along with anger it brings you will cost you 2000$ on shrinks. Lending money unless its a real and life threatening situation should always be prohibited. Let me tell you the subtle difference. The difference between it is that in one case you are letting people abuse your kindness, and the other is when its an emergency. Its also because you don't understand that this person isn't a friend, rather a vulture that uses the people around him as tools (spades,and sand if you like) to fill up the gaps he has been creating in his life. No no and no, when you are in desperate need of help, a real friend steps into your life when a fake friend steps out. 9/10 that if you would ask him a favor he would laugh at your face, or give an exuse. Go ahead and try it, tell us the results of a moment where you need help that you have put in scene simply to evaluate his friendship. I bet you'll come back red as a tomato from anger and disappointment beyond belief of what you thought to be a real friend. My advice. Close yourself to bad people/things/events and open yourself up to good people/things/events. I believe one poster here told how his poor household won a million dollars , and then suddenly the vultures in the family started lending money of which they never saw a penny back. Welcome to life, a place filled with darkness and hatred and people with no good intentions. Of course you shouldn't become like them, hell we need more of the perfect kind of people from heaven like you to bring love and light into this world. What i just want you to be VERY aware of is that there are individuals in this world who do not have the best interest in you. -
I was a very lonely person but one night i had a dream " i was with my family and confronted my uncle with my lonelyness. He said ' if you don't want to be alone, you have to step towards the people" Best darn piece of advice i ever had in a dream. And its true, no action = no reaction. So its important to understand its an investment you have to make from your side. A relationship costs time, so be sure you have that before you initiate one. So its not just about moving to your own space, i mean lets face now you still have your parents, if you goto that appartment you'll be more alone then ever. But it would be good if you where to be in an environment where you have loads of oppertunity to meet people, a city provides a lot of people (shutting yourself off from the bad is a good decision) while you can open yourself up to nice folks.
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It is a typical male thing to just drop all connections and then boost out of everybody's lives. The great question which lies on your lips is WHY? The answer, he is fed up with you. Its not because anything is wrong with you in that sense. You know your conversations and visits most likely where too excessive, which made him feel he couldn't do the things he wanted to do in his life, and everytime he wanted to escape from that world, you pulled him back in. This is why he abruptly slashed you out of his world, because he felt it was the only way to get rid of your meddling. You know a disabled person (not everyone but still) might not be able to deal with as much as a normal person because they already have their hands full with their disability, and might easily be agitated because they are already in a situation they most likely don't want to be in, and if they are pressed to be in a relationship/friendship. Well let me explain it to you in this way. I think that if he would say, please don't visit me anymore, you would deny that request and still visit him, because you are so rusted shut in the idea of you and him being friends, that you wouldn't leave him alone. I mean i think that you have constantly had the idea that he valued your visits. Personally i think he initially allowed you into his life , but then got fed up with you. So what does this mean for you? I think that you have to understand that having a relationship/friendship is also about letting the other be able to have some time for themselves so they can do their own thing, as towards being together. Time for self balanced on time for others, so you don't give the other person the feeling that they are suffocating.
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Very beautifull I hope you can learn from the mistakes you've made in your relationships and here on enotalone to the extend where people attract you instead of pushing you overboard out of their lives or from the board.
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aight ok :S
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The bottomline: YOU DONT WANT TO BE WITH A LIAR! So don't waste your time on salvaging this relationship, its over and done for. Why? Because YOU deserve to be NR.1 in the life of your partner. And you are not, so you are richer without him. File for a divorce, and never blame yourself for its not your fault he is returning to porn or his ex. If he wants that, fine... But not in your life.
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Well im not gay so i have no idea from first hand experience, but what i have read from people who posted their personal experiences is that gay people (can) have a harsh environment ,religiously or social pressure's , which will make them go into the closet as they say, and only start having real intimate relationships if they are like 18 years or older because they are then able to free themselves of their parents/environment and maby live individually and start their own relationships with guys they like. They usually meet eachother in gay bars so they don't have to question the nature of the guy in person.
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Personally i would go to his country to live with him. Tell him your busy arranging the paper work, and that you want to marry him and live forever with him. Even if things fail, just get into a country that gives better chances. But also remember that life is what you make of it, make sure you make a positive impact on your environment.
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- Make up your mind. The thing is a lot of people are being put in a position of being insecure because you don't make clear decisions, nor do you make clear intentions of who or what you want. When a person comes to you and wants to date you they possibly want a relationship. And personally i think you are keeping these people on a line, and i think it takes too long, as you are keeping those people's lives on a halt including yourself. You know you are insecure if you really want something with these people or not, and they are insecure on wether you want something with them or not. So my first question. Are you really in love with Alex? I mean is he something you want because it is convienant for you? Convienant feelings for someone as long as it suits you correctly? I mean personally i think if you really 'fall' for someone, you know for sure that you love and want to be with that person. I also think that you are so busy with all the issues you have in your mind that you are unable to determine who you really want. You know you should consider yourself as Robin Hood who has to hit the target in the bullseye ,whilst avoiding hitting all the useless trees. Waiting too long, and the target might get out of sight. So make sure on what you want in your life. Personally i think that if you really love Alex, that you should give him a chance.
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Its definitly a win win situation for you, if you ask her out and she says no, you can move on with your life, if she says yes you got a date. Thing is you never hit if you never shoot right? So give it a shot, and don't be your own worst enemy by letting your shyness stopping you. Go for the kill cuz you got nothing to lose.
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Negativity leads to nowhere. Its true and you could say this to him, also more is that you have to go against the negativity , by also showing him that there is good in the world, which should be celebrated. Its not all doom and gloom. Side note is that i would love to see the newpapers having at least 1 page that is dedicated to good news, and 5 minutes on the t.v news in every show, about something good or nice that has happened.
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Why does it feel worse second time around?
robowarrior replied to warhuhwow's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Be honest to yourself, you have too much going on now in your life and the last thing you are looking for is to be with a instable person that doesn't know what she wants, personally i hate lightswitch relationships, on, off, on off, on, off, whats it going to be? I preferably say you tried, it failed, move on. -
Will Someone Please Explain?
robowarrior replied to pacopaco's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Its pretty easy to understand, our emotional brain is like glue to the people we are in love with. If things go wrong, we want to do everything in our power to fix it. Its like an infinite washing machine , we just keep going overthinking in circles how we should deal with the situation. Even if the relationship is over, the machine keeps on going. So as long as no one pushes the 'STOP' button. It will keep on going. Its important to understand that if your car comes at a dead end road or street, that its pointless to wanting to go on, instead turn your car around and head back to the main highway of life. Or in other words, move on and find someone else. -
Pffft it doesn't take a genius to understand that this man is reading you like a book. For heavens sake, if a man asks in what kind of men you are interested it, its only meant so he can adapt to be that man your interested in. But personally i think your rushing things. Your almost pushed into a relationship and your head over heels in love with him, your completely blinded and would take him into your life, without knowing anything about him. You know barely nothing about his good/bad parts, you know you have my blessing to try to get a relationship with him, just be carefull ok?
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*hugs* here we can be alone together because your not alone. Ask yourself, what good has being shy ever done for you = 0. So trash it, you don't got anything to lose because you have no friends already right? Its not like if you make a wrong move at this point you'll lose dozens of friends. This is why you don't even have to be shy in the initial stage, just throw yourself for the lions and see what comes out. My mother would say 'you already have no, so you might as well try and get yes'.
