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About Me

Mod Notes

  1. I (M28) dated my now ex gf (F26) for 2 years and half a month. She was my first gf. She broke up with me on the 1st April this year... (yeah I first thought it would be an Aprils fools joke) because she said she wasn't happy anymore with our relationship and needed to do it before she would suffer mentally from it. After work the told me if we could talk. At the time being I didn't knew why she was not happy anymore. The days before we didnt had arguments and everything seemed normal imo... So I was really shocked by it. I cried, begged, promised I would change and do whatever I can to take me back. But of course it didn't work. Well now I do know the reasons (through thinking a lot): I basically didn't show her enough that I love and care for her (rarely bought flowers, didn't push her (we sometimes talked about going to the gym together or going out more often. We never did). I didn't help much with chores or I forgot to do some of them when she asked me to do them. I was gaming addicted (spend thousands of euros on mobile games. I went into treatment half a year ago after my last fallback...). I went to 1 on 1 sessions but rarely went to group meetings. (She was clearly disappointed by the later). But I manage to get over it. The break up kind of helped too... 😕 The addiction was one of the reasons she nearly broke up with me half a year into the relationship. The last few months were a bit declining especially in terms of ambition on my part. I am in apprenticeship as an IT specialist for system integration. I got a bit of trouble in work got basically out sourced and I need to find a new job after I am done. I didn't learn much for the then upcoming exam (a week ago). (Which I am sure did well on after finally learning for it after the break up). Me and my gf did a lot of things together (watching movies, series and YouTube or playing some games together when she wanted). So we got pretty much along really good. But I now know there are more things to a good relationship... To add to that: I went straight to life with my parents to my ex. So I never really learned how to life alone and manage all this stuff... 😕 After the break up I stayed two weeks until I found a new place. I now life with two males and we get along really good. In the time between this I did all the chores (for myself to form a new habit) and noticed how hard it was for her. One day she forgot something I messaged her about and I was frustrated (now I know how she must have felt...) My ex told me we could be friends (I first declined but accepted it a day later) and when I asked her (two times) if she thinks we can get back together she told me: "I don't know. Time needs to tell". She talked to my mother once and they basically both said: "I think he is learning from his mistakes". We are currently on friendly terms and texting sometimes. Most of the times I initiate it. But it's light and friendly. I think she enjoys it. I told her via phone call that I accepted the break up, want to look forward, learned my lesson but I like her a lot and want the friendship to work between us. So what I basically want to ask, do you think there is any hope, if I show her I change my behaviours? And can make her happy the next time? I mean the door for it is open?! Should I tell her I am trying to get her back? Or just go with the flow, being a good friend, try to show my changes? TLDR: gf broke up with me because I was lazy and didn't show her how much she meant for me, she lost trust in me. Is there a possibility to get back together, if I show her while being friends that I change?
  2. I hope in this journal people learn to understand people with autism. " In a box, not a bottle" is a private joke between me and my son. It is how we describe his experience with Asperger's . link removed
  3. I look on this forum a lot to see if there are any new stories about people getting back together with their ex's. I do it just so that I can have some hope, and I really hope someday I can post my story on here to give others confidence that having hope pays off. In the meantime, I am going to make a list of actual stories of people I know that broke up and got back together. Please post your stories here too and we can put a little bit of cheer into this forum. 1. My friend was dumped by his girlfriend of 4 years. They were broken up for a year and a half and he tried everything to get her back. One day he was with his friend talking about her and she called him right then to talk about something trivial, and he went over to her house. They got back together and now they are engaged. 2. My friend's sister and her husband broke up for four years and now they are married with 3 kids. 3. My friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when we were 19 and they got back together a few years later and have been together ever since. 4. My other friend broke up with her high school sweetheart when she was a sophomore in college and they just got back together and now they live together. 5. A friend of my ex's was so sad about a girl forever, talked about her all the time when we were out at the clubs, couldn't believe they broke up, etc....now they have been back together for over a year. 6. My friend and her boyfriend dated for a few years, broke up for 9 months, now they are engaged. She says their relationship is better than ever now they are back together. 7. My friend was hung up on this guy forever, he would go back and forth and never commit, now they are living together and she is going to have a baby. They are really happy and in the end it worked out great. That is just some of the stories I know off the top of my head. Please post any stories of reconciliation that you know of so that we can have some cheer in this forum.
  4. It’s been a number of years since I was here last, and I’m only coming back because way back then I was a mess my last name was aftershock879 if anyone wanted to read back. maybe I can try and help others who were where I was, trying to get back with an ex, it literally consumed me for the longest time. I did actually end up getting back together with her, but it didn’t last and it was me that ended up finishing it with her (I worked with her) it’s probably been over 10 years since that happened. fast forward to now, I’m happily married to my best friend, we have kids and are happy, happier than I’d ever been with my ex. don’t give up hope, I let my ex treat me like crap and pandered to her demands, I lost friends in the process. don’t let them change who you are, you’ll only end up regretting the things you did because of having rose tinted glasses on. listen to your friends and family, they can see what it’s doing to you, I spent hours talking about it to anyone who would listen it was only when my brother pulled me to one side and basically told me straight. They can see your hurt, they are looking in from the outside, when you’re in it you don’t see what they do. it was only after I realised how I’d acted, I was looking for anything that gave me hope, which how I found this site. reading hundreds of threads, people all the same as me, looking for answers, any answers. I read back and I cringe at how I acted but that’s what love does right, it beats the crap out of you, or so I thought. When you find the person you should be with you know, and it’s always unexpected, it will could be your ex. Just make sure you stay true to who you are, never settle. Even recently I’ve had texts off her saying she still loved me and regretted what happened, a long time ago that’s all I thought I ever wanted. Not now, not one part of me even cared, I let go of that a long time ago. We we’re colleagues, and a period I look back not with fondness more of a realisation that I deserved better then and where I am now is where I’m supposed to be, happy, content, looking forward to the future and watching my kids grow. Please don’t give up, there’s always hope. Surround yourself with people who love you, keep busy, go to the gym, go running play Xbox/PlayStation. you’ll feel better for it, trust me. Music always helped me get through rough times a few songs stood out for me. The best deceptions - Dashboard confessional Rootless Tree - Damien Rice Reckless - You me and Six Not sure if this will help anyone, but I hope it just shows that no matter how low you feel there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. Take it easy everyone.
  5. In my opinion...online. If you have met the girl in person and one day she wakes up and says to herself, "Gee, I am going to break up with my boyfriend." and then she does it, it is a rather sickening and horrific way of getting rid of you. Sadly in some cases there isn't a choice. This has happened to me nearly a year ago but I know friends both male and female who are victim to this. I think the worst thing is it seems easy for them. They do not see the pain in your eyes when you are told the news. They cannot see your facial expression to see how much it affected you. They cannot see the torture you have just endured for that second you read that note. They cannot see how all of your hopes and dreams have been wiped off the face of the earth and so has all of your efforts of being with that person. It is a horrible way to die and trust me, I feel for you guys out there because I been there and I would rather be lonely for good than to even imagine what the dumper is thinking in their mind. It appears so horrible for the fact that this person APPEARS to have put no effort into getting rid of you. I seen chickens receieve a better ending than that. So what ways do you think are horrible ways to go out? Let's hear some experiences and get the loads of crab dung off our chests.
  6. Hi this would be my first post here. I had an issue I’m not sure how to sort out with a girl I have feelings for so here I am I guess! 😅 I’m a 26 year old guy and have unfortunately lost a very close person in my life and don’t know what to do.. Basically right at the start of the pandemic I went through a lot of painful depression and a rejection with a girl I really liked in college and I got really depressed and felt terrible as 2020 kicked off. But a few months later with the encouragement of a female friend I got a particular dating app and matched with a girl I’ll call Alice. I got her number and we talked sometimes and we always got along well and enjoyed talking to one another and eventually ended up being good friends the rest of the year. She thought I was cute and really liked my personality and vise versa and wanted to go on a date, but we couldn’t actually hang until 2021 because she worked a lot of hours as a manager at a warehouse and could barely afford to live and had a very stressful life which I completely understood. We really bonded, talked on the phone and texted and we were very close. She always was there for me and it was like we’d known each other our entire lives, and she said she felt the same as well. Things were good and we always planned to finally meet one day. We were so close and it was the most amazing thing in the world because I understood her and she understood me very well, and we both admitted to each other that we both felt like soulmates. The world made sense with her there and she told me she felt the same way too and it was genuine. She wanted to see me and get to know me in person. A little while later one day she told me she had to let me know she already had a guy, and that she still wanted to talk to me. I was upset but I told her we could still talk and be friends. It’s funny because even after she told me that it’s like we both grew even closer and I got the feeling she still liked me and we shared our hopes and dreams together. She always told me she had no one in her life who supported or helped her and I was the only one, and she was so happy I was in her life. I know some people might think she was just leading me on but I can say for certain she wasn’t. She legitimately cared about me and liked me. All her words and actions confirmed it. She was always there for me and helped me out when I had nobody and I always did everything I could to help her. We got very close and she always helped me and told me how grateful she was I was in her life, and how I was her one and only because I was the only person in her life that supported or cared about her. She always told me she wanted to see me and didn’t want me to go or be gone from her life. She told me she was very unhappy with everything in her life and that I really helped her feel better whenever she was sad or upset for any reason. It was amazing having someone like her there. Like somebody who understood you, who thought like you and who was always saying they were there for you and wouldn’t ever go. Like somebody could be the only thing you’d ever need, someone who could take all your sadness away and replace it with happiness.. she did that for me and I let her know she did. And she was very happy she could do that for me. Alice was really an amazing person.. I prayed for someone like her and my prayers were answered. Then finally we met. We went to a carnival and when we finally met it was amazing, like she was the lost love, the soulmate who was always out there for me. We had an amazing time and got to know one another, but it was like we already knew each other (aside from texting and phone calls) all our lives. It was amazing and she told me so much about herself, even her deepest feelings and secrets. She wanted to hang with me again and told me she was so happy I was in her life and we planned to hang out again after that wonderful day. It was like two people destined for each other meeting, it was truly amazing. Well, after a few weeks of talking like we always did and everything being perfect, out of the blue I got a voicemail from her. She said she had some news that wasn’t good, and that she only liked me as a friend, and that she didn’t wanna cause an issue in her current relationship because of us. She said she appreciated everything I did for her but that she felt like we had to stop talking. She said she was sorry things had to end like this but she felt it was the best thing for her to do at that time... I haven’t heard from her in a couple months and I am beyond heartbroken. I guess I just want some advice on what to do, because I feel in my heart we were soulmates, and I don’t use that word lightly. I know it’s hard to communicate all that happened between us in just a few paragraphs but I can assure you all that we were indeed very close and she had feelings for me. I just wanted to know if there’s any advice that could help me sort this out, help me to know if there’s a chance things could go back to the way they were, or if the feelings she had for me could be rekindled? I thought as a last resort I could go to see her in person and try to talk to her, ask her what went wrong or if we could even be friends at least again. I’m just feeling very lost right now, not knowing if she’ll hate me for going to see her or what.. I just need some advice on how to sort this all out. I pray for her and for things to work out everyday, I just feel so bad that someone I was so close with could just abandon me like that. I know some people might say to just move on but please understand we were very close. Despite having somebody already and having a difficult life she made room in her life and her heart for me. We both meant a lot to each other. I can’t just write it all off as being all for nothing. If anyone has some advice to offer me some hope or encouragement to try to see her again please let me know, and please keep in mind I’m a sensitive guy. Thanks for reading this and thank you for leaving any advice. I greatly appreciate it!
  7. I've become heartless, cold and angry, yet i don't know why, I got over a tough relationship with my ex girl and found myself angry. I was seeing other women after that but I could'nt care less about them. Lately at work i've been somewhat of an a..hole to my co-workers, I don't talk to the family much and don't really care much about my close friends problems. I know it's not because of the break up, I got over that, but I still feel like I failed as a man or a person in general, I'm unhappy with my life, I don't wanna be where I am, but i'm stuck, I support my sick parents financially, there are so many things I want and can't have, I feel alone but don't really want anyone in my life right now cause I don't wanna bring them down with me it's a dilemma I can't figure out, I know theres gotta be something I could do. I know i'm not depressed or in need of a shrink, I'm sure it's something simple...I hope
  8. Hey everyone. I'm a 23 year old guy who just had his heart broken by his now ex-girlfriend after a one year relationship. She broke up with me two weeks ago. She is 21 and has been in a four year relationship, and then the one year with me. She recently broke up with me because she "really needs to be alone right now." She always told me how much she loved me, and she wanted to move in together. But all of a sudden she drops me like a bad habit. I told her I understood why she needs to be alone. But she is handling this much better than I am. I've been trying to leave her alone, but I did text her once yesterday telling her how much I miss her, and I hope things are going well for her. She replied to my text by simply saying "Hey, thanx for the text. I hope things are going good for u." Don't get me wrong. I'm not a smothering, obsessive boyfriend (honestly). I have several questions that I need answered. 1) Will she come back? What can I do to get her back? 2) Is the "I need to be alone" excuse just another way of saying I want to be with other guys? 3) What did I do that would cause her to drop me so suddenly? I'm not going to contact her anymore. But I was thinking about giving it a few months and then emailing her to meet me for dinner. Is this a good way to go? Can anyone relate to what I'm feeling/talking about? Any help /suggestionswould be greatly appreciated.
  9. Is there any hope for me i find my self a highschool student... I have no where to think about what i can do to support myself. The Honest truth is im so dumb that if i was as dumb as jessica simpson i would be three times as rich. I really am stupid and i think i have no hope. I love cars, im just not smart enough to get into a school to learn about them. Im very unsure about what to do....Plain and simple i am terrible at school, not a bad kid, not troubled. Just terrible academicly. Am i destined to be a failure in life or will i find someone or something that can help me.
  10. Hi im writing this to you to tell you i will always remember ever since the day you left this earth i see the shadow of your face at night when i am asleep i cant forget i cant forget those calls in the middle of night those things you said to keep going even in the red you never quit even when i did when i cry in the middle of the night i feel your hand upon your shoulder you tried so hard and when you disappeared i lost hope in everything i have no vision from the springs on my hands they close down but ill never get a firm grasp on things im ashamed of myself without you i feel lost you were not only my uncle but my best friend ill never forget.. even when im old and gray ill always remember those days ill never forget how you saved my grace i hurt so bad inside and misery owns my cells you gave me your watch and said even though your time was gone mine was still ticking but in memory of you i will keep pushing through agony, suicide, and the misery just for you... only for you
  11. I gave my number out to a guy after we "seemed" to hit it off. He hasn't called me yet. It's been 1 week. Is he not interested? What's the "cut off" time to give up hope that he's never going to call?
  12. Hello everyone, just wondered what you make of the following. My ex and I broke up 5 months ago after a year and half together including 5 - 6 months of living together. It was really her who decided we weren't right for each other and we should break up. She said at the time, we'll always be friends, and I hope so much we can be friends etc etc. We have made a few attempts at being friends but things are normally a bit tense, the last time we met she was 25 minutes late and couldn't remember whether we had said 8 or 8.30. I was pretty annoyed about this and told her. So fast forward a couple of months and I have a new gf, dunno whether she is seeing anyone or not - i think she is though, a guy from her work. She emails me on Monday (Valentines day) to say "I really think we had best not be in contact with each other as I don't believe that things will manage to be friendly for a good while yet. take care of yourself." I replied to her saying "ok then if that's what you think, although I am assuming you mean that I wouldn't manage to be friendly to you which I hope would not be true, anyway I don't feel like I can try to make contact with you anymore, so it's up to you. I'm seeing someone else now anyway, but I did hope we could be friends, I guess not though. maybe see you around some time I guess." Why would she decide this - is she trying to muck me around ? I didn't tell her who I am seeing as it is a girl we both used to work beside. It looks like we'll never speak to each other again to be honest, since there is no way now I can make contact with her. Although now I'm not really too bothered about that other than a bit sad that we'll become total strangers. Just wondered what you all thought. Steve.
  13. I just recently had to accept that a 3yr relationship was over. I also had to move out since it seemed only right and I could not stomach watching him receive calls and go out on dates with others. (we lived together) But now Im living in a new home as a housemate and I feel totally lost and bewildered. I dont seem to fit in anywhere socially and have no friends of mine own. Most I did know were his friends so of course I have no support from that peanut gallery. I work nights which adds to my sorrow for I meet so very few because of this shift. But I love my company and wont give it up its the one true stable enviorment I have left and I feel like I belong there. Does anyone know of a web site for us vampires who are single and looking?. I know we each have different levels and times we heal but how do you stop thinking of what could of been rather than whats it going to be like. I hate being alone and I hate not having someone to touch me, hold me, kiss on me..and my first summer single is looking pretty lame. I feel like Im just too old who'd want me most men I talk to want that tanned young 20 something to grace his arm. I feel like I dont fit in anywhere. I just want to curl up and sleep my whole life away. My dreams, wishes, and hopes were all wrapped up in that relationship and he just decided "I dont love you, never did and I never intended to marry you" how do you hold firm to your sense of self when that's been slammed into you full throttle. I dont know what to do with myself anymore. He ended our relationship with that line and with me in financial dire straights and Im going to be looking for a second job on the weekends. Otherwise its PB&J for the next 19months..Ive applied for food stamps but proably wont get them since I dont have children. I sure could use some encouraging words of hope.
  14. hey everyone well about halfway through last year i wanted 2 live with one of my 3 sisters because i wasnt happy with the area i was living in and i was really depressed. anway so they all gave me false hope and led me to believe it was ok to move with them then changed their mind. i never really opened up to them until i was led to believe i was getting out of here and then i started to. the funny thing is not one of them apologised for doing that. im not hurt at the fact i couldnt go but the fact they led me to believe i could and then burst my bubble. ive tried to tell them how much it hurt but they just said your only 16 and i dont want you 2 be my responsibility. the funny thing is if the situations were reversed id still take them in even after the pain they caused me. so basically i forgave them i dint 4get wat they did and accepted i got 2 more years in this hole. but now its 4th week of school and i get depressed for no reason sometimes but other times i feel fine all i want to know is does anyone know a way i can stop these random depressions. and how can i stop it
  15. I wrote this one last year... Prison How long must I languish in this prison? My soul lies in a cold, dark place, so Twisted even the wind laughs at my plight. Walls of confusion, disappointment, fear, Disenchantment and pain vanquish every Last tiny drop of hope. I've spent so long in this place, that I seem to have forgotten my fondest dreams; I seem to have forgotten my self... Through rusted bars, I see the world Spinning, everyone seems to live Free, while I just exist - Alone - for an eternity, but when The night comes, I feel even More forsaken... The porridge I'm served poisons My soul - life force-feeds me Images that test my soul... ...a plot to enrage me, to make me jealous, make me explode, make me a real offender... Images of held-hands, warm Embraces, touching mouths, Merging bodies, uniting souls... ...that which I yearn for so Much, with all that remains Of Me. I want to go on hunger strike, But the tiniest echo of compunction Doesn't let me euthanise. Even Papillion would not have Withstood this level of harrow for Long. Melancholy is my only visitor, And she is not there for my health. What did I do to warrant this Punishment? Through the bars again, I look at So many who deserve this prison Much more than I. Those will half-a-heart, with guile On their mind, and with carnal impetuses. This world praises them and all that they do. But now my heart is colder and Harder than theirs' ever was. I've been on trial all my life, Yet no advocate has come To my rescue. Every day I'm questioned even more, I cannot defend myself - I have Nothing left with which to plea. Down I go, deeper and deeper, There is no jury, and this trial I endure has no connection with fair. I'm in a prison, from which I cannot Escape - I have condemned myself To a life sentence of loneliness. I'm guilty, of course! But of what? Of gentleness, honesty, sensitivity, and being true...
  16. In my last post I was told not to sing or write for my ex which I really cannot control. If you want to hear the CD that was playing that night at my ex's work, when she said turn it off to who ever had it, go to... link removed then go to to the top bar and hit search, then where it says artest type in Deja Juniper, it should bring up a few songs. Another thing is she hasn't herd any of the songs off of the new album (with the tracks for her) yet, noone has, only the people working on the album with me, so the music that was playing was songs she's herd b-4, not the new stuff. That track I did for every one here on E-notalone is up as well. It's called "Burning Bridges". My style is strange but I write from the heart. I can only hope my words will help you guys as much as they help me. I'm not trying to plug my stuff, I just want you to hear where I'm coming from. Thanks for you time, Deja
  17. A girl and I became very close (romantically) - just kissing. She has stong feelings for someone else who has been gone for a year and won't be back for another year. She decided we can't be "together" because she wants to remain loyal to this other guy. I dated her knowing this, but in hopes that she would fall in love for me. She's only known me for a couple of months. I think I still have a chance with her. Should I: A. Maintain the same relationship we had before. Calling each other and hanging out a lot. B. Let her call the shots. Wait for her to call me. Wait for her to ask to hang out. Give us both time to reflect, but mainly for her to realize who I am to her. C. Like A, but keeping our contact to a minimum. I hope I will hear from some people who have had experience with this, and knows which methods work and which don't.
  18. Hey all, I'm a sophmore in high school but im only 14 i look about 17 though and im really mature for my age cos of the stuff i've gone through in life. Anyways i wanted to know if because of my age juniors that are 17 won't want to date me while im still 14 even though i'm just a year below them, but really have 2-3 years in age difference. Thanx for reading my post, i hope u can help me out
  19. Hello. I have a new situation. This past week I spent four valuable days riding accross the U.S. on Amtrak. There was a bit of fate involved here...I was on a train I was not scheduled to ride, but my first train was delayed due to a tunnel fire. So I scrambled to catch a train in Sacramento, California. On board, I met a group of people also travelling out East. One by one, we all departed at various stops, but one of the group was with me until Syracuse, New York. He was a handsome, outgoing young man who was journeying home after being in California for a week. We didn't speak until Chicago, when we found out we were being transferred to the same train. We talked while we were waiting, and he seemed quite attentive to me,which brightened my day. When we finally boarded, we discovered we had to ride in separate cars due to our differing destinations. As I was herded away, he called out to me, "Meet me in the lounge!" An hour later I went to the lounge and found he had just arrived there,looking for me. We got some food and continued talking. Hours passed and we did not move from our seats. The attendant for my car saw our developing bond and gave us permission to sit in the lounge for the rest of our trip. All night we talked and laughed. My new friend begged me to get off the train with him in Syracuse. In fact, he asked me all night to come with him, but I had to refuse because I had set plans I couldn't break. He was very disappointed, but made me promise to visit him in Syracuse on my way back,which will be on the 29th. It is a crazy event for me,and I am not sure how he climbed into my heart, but he did. He let me sleep in his arms, and his embrace was a light, warm place....He told me this was love at first sight for him,that I was completely unique, that he wanted for me to "be his girl." He marvelled over how much we had in common, and told me he found me intelligent and alluring. I know it all seems so silly and unrealisitc, but I cannot help keeping him on my mind,wondering why he has not called. He told me he would call me last night to see if I arrived, but he did not. Again, my heart is on my sleeve. I was very cautious and did not reveal too much of my heart to him, but I wonder why he has not attempted to contact me. The entire time I was with him I scrutinized his actions to determine if he was being sincere. Maybe he was not, and I was just a few hours of diversion for him. Is this why he has not called? Perhaps men would rather enjoy a woman's company for a brief time, and just find relaxtion and pleasure in flirting heavily with a new girl? I do not know. He litterally pleaded all night for me to deboard the train and come with him. Just a ploy? He made me solemnly promise to visit him on my way back, and asked me to call him. Should I? I have been told that if a woman calls, a man quickly loses interest because there is no more challenge. I would like to call him (I feel in the mood for a romantic adventure, and this man has struck a chord in my being) but is this not advisable? I am always checking my phone in hopes that I will see he has called. Dear me, I am such a hopeless romantic. I need advice desperately...a man's point of view would help me greatly.
  20. I broke-up with my first boyfriend and didn't know anything about NC rules then. I became very weak and called him many times to the point he thought I was a stalker and dissed me badly. I am sure I came accross as ultra-clingy, needy, and insecure. Now it's been 4 months since NC, and I still love him but I'm not as weak as I was the first days after the split up. How much time should one wait to break the NC rules after having made a fool of oneself?
  21. I'm not happy w/ myself, but for the past few years I've tried to push myself further, hoping that things will get better. Once in awhile, things go well. But so often, I find myself relapsing, and miserable. I have my whole life in front of me, but at times, I feel like I could just fall over and give up. I'm tired of living such a boring life-- but this I can't change, I'm still in school and I need to work. What I've always wanted was a wonderful boyfriend. But that's not happening. I know... I've heard it all before, I've even said it myself as advice to others-- you have plenty of time for guys, you'll meet Mr. Right, a guy should not be your number one priority, etc, etc, etc.... I'd need to love myself first to be in a healthy relationship, but I don't even know where to start anymore. I don't know what I'm doing w/ myself anymore. I don't have any energy. I feel like I'm just drifting away. Everything's just passing me by, and it all means nothing. Everything is starting to bring me down even more. When I try to show interest in a guy, I get too shy and just wait for things to happen. Whenever someone else criticizes me, I take it really hard. I do'nt know what to do anymore... I feel like such a waste....
  22. hello me and my room mate's foud one of are other room mate's poems we think he would like to se this posted so here go's feel my anger and my hate feel the depth of my hate. as it makes me burn . take head they who speek to my face . for you to will feel my hate. as i burn you down. as i feel you turn you will. knell befor me in this time as i reush into your bestilled haert . with thy knife. feel it burn deep in as it perices you haert aging . this is my love this is my song to you. as you fall to the floor you will be no more . as i give you one last breath befor i still our haert aging . i wisper in you ear feel my love for this world . my friend wrote this one and its the way i feel rigth now . about someone hope you all like his work he is far better then i
  23. i find myself home on this friday night first time in many years i met this girl 1 year ago and we broke up 3 weeks ago shes all over the board we still talk even though she alreay meet a guy 3 weeks ago and is already sleeping with him on wednesday we went to the beach and hade a couple of drinks and thats when i found out i really dont care shes sleeping with another kid i still want her back because she is so perfect for me its to bad she had to leave before i figurred that out i really want her back when we were together we were perfect except for the ocassinal jelousy fits i would have about fone calls and such anyway i asked her at lest 10 times that if she broke up with the new kid would she give me another chance and every time she said yes she said we will try to remain friends but i am having trouble getting time to spend with her because she is spending alot of time with her new man we talk on the phone olmost every day i think i am doing most of the calling and we have been out twice since the break up i have visted her about 6 other times half ended in fights crying on bolth sides and then mutal agrements to stay in touch i am 19 and she is 18 in a couple of months she starts school again in 2 days and i asked pick her up from work sunday so i could see her before she goes back any way i will wait along time for this girl even though she hurt me so much for another chance because i love her so much it has been preaty rocky but now the break up seems alittle eaiser i was just woundering if any one has ever been able to convince there ex that they have changed and to give them another chance even though the ex has already filled there time with another kid and how they did it? also if anyone has ever been in a sitiation like myself and how did it pan out? any commets or suggetions would be greatly appreatioted
  24. Bitter sweet Love A warm embrace From loving arms Making me feel loved Like I was meant to be in this world A bitter sweet kiss From ever loving lips I am floating on cloud 9 In never ending bliss Those three words Make the world seem right They say so much Yet at the same time nothing at all A dark soul turned to light A smile to a frown You lifted me up When I was so down I welcome you to my life And if you think you can cope Then stay and love me Till the end of time Hey guys,this isnt one of my better poems,but it is uplifiting.A nice change to my others.Hope you enjoy. ~Meagan~
  25. I've been thinking lately how i still hope that my ex gf might want to reconcile someday. What am I thinking? She broke up with me about 4-5 weeks ago, and went directly to another man. She has not even shown a bit of remorse, and she only contacted me just to get some of her things out of my house. So basically, she has moved on so why the heck do I have hope? Has anyone else been in a situation where your ex doesn't want anything to do with you(and was seeing someone else), and out of the blue they call you back maybe 3-4 months down the road? I doubt it. But if so, please share (See, I still have a slight hope - what an idiot i am)
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