Jump to content

Search the Community

Showing results for tags 'birthday'.

  • Search By Tags

    Type tags separated by commas.
  • Search By Author

Content Type


Forums

  • Relationships
    • Dating Advice
    • Relationship Advice
    • Infidelity
    • Online Dating
    • Friendship and Friends
    • Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender
    • Abuse and Violence
    • Long-Distance Relationships
    • Age Gap Relationships
    • Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend Relationships
    • Trust and Relationships
    • Marriage/Long Term Relationships
  • Breaking up and Divorce
    • Breaking Up Advice
    • Divorce Advice
    • Getting Back Together
    • Healing After Break Up or Divorce
  • Personal Growth
    • Personal Growth
    • Career, Money and Education
    • Grief Loss and Bereavement
  • Families
    • Parenting and Families
    • Pets
  • Health: Body, Mind and Spirit
    • Health: Body, Mind and Spirit
    • Suicide & Self-Harm
  • Sex and Romance
    • Sex and Romance
    • Pregnancy
  • Emotions and Feelings
    • Emotions and Feelings
    • Jealousy
  • General Forums
    • Forum Assistance
  • Journals's Journals
  • Journals's Private Journals
  • Off Topic's Topics
  • Book Talk's Topics
  • Travel and Culture's Topics
  • Poetry, Prose, Art & Photography's Topics

Blogs

  • Articles
  • Youtube
  • News

Find results in...

Find results that contain...


Date Created

  • Start

    End


Last Updated

  • Start

    End


Filter by number of...

Joined

  • Start

    End


Group


About Me


Mod Notes

  1. Hey all, a friend of mine's birthday is coming up. This friend is a photographer by hobby. My friend told me once that she wanted these butterflies for her pictures that she just can't seem to find. I thought this would be a perfect gift, but I don't know what they are. I saw them in a picture and they seem like fake butterflies that are like accessories for a photographer. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? If you do, what is it that I am looking for? If no one knows could anyone please help me out with a gift idea for a photographer that is under $50?
  2. Your psychiatrist is counting down the months till retirement Twenty-seven He won't show you your file because it's nothing but grocery lists and doodles Two ball-point-pen girls playing beach volleyball The blue one is winning again Hipsters on the patio mispronouncing French cigarettes Mixing hard and soft G's Hard and soft drinks When you see an odd number of lights in the distance That means there's a bus coming God never creates just one of anything But he does seem quite fond of odd numbers You tell the bus driver you'll never complain about bus drivers in this city again Ever since you realized that the cops were worse The LED lights in her apartment window mean someone's home You think about 99 New York beat poets lamenting the ugliness of neon lights And wonder if any of them lived to see LEDs The door swings open You didn't even ring the bell but somehow she just knew you were there This might not be such a bad birthday after all Twenty-seven.
  3. I'm pretty sure that this guy I like likes me back but is shy. I realized after a long time of being awkward and weird around each other that he basically is mirroring me and so I started to relax around him (which is not always easy) and he as a result is way more relaxed around me.He looks for reasons to approach me, sometimes lame excuses, but I just accept it and play along.I invited him to my birthday party and he brought me a beautiful wine. I wouold love him to ask me out already but I feel I've put myself out there as much as I can. Any advice to spurring him to ask me out, or words of encouragement on the progress.Please don't tell me to ask him out,its not an option. Thank you
  4. Today is her birthday. I sent her a "card" with the print of my avatar/picture. Forget any NC talk. So she loved the picture. Laughed about it. (I snaked it off this site!) We were great drinking buddies. lol ....it sucks when sex screws up a great friendship. I just want to hang out. Play some Yahtzee, Boggle or scrabbble then pass out on her couch. Whatever.
  5. Hi again everyone- Just needing to vent again and get this off of my chest. Some of you may know my story and what I've been going through. I'm not going to reiterate everything here...just want to write about the latest in the saga. Today is my birthday. It's been a tough day but I tried to keep myself busy and not be completely sad and miserable all day. I haven't heard a word from the STBX all week. I AGAIN resolved to go NC...sent ANOTHER final good-bye e-mail on Wednesday and left ANOTHER final good-bye voice mail yesterday. I told him that my b-day was a good time for me to resolve to move on and get over him since he won't answer me about definitely wanting the divorce. I told him I figured that actions speak louder than words and it's time for me to let go. That was tough....I cried alot after I left that message. I did not expect to hear anything from him today but this evening he sent me a text message...something like this..."Happy Birthday! I know I am a jerk whether I wish you a happy birthday or not. I've been thinking about you alot today! I hope you can have a good b-day. I'm sorry." My heart flip-flopped when I read that! WHY does he keep doing this to me? What does that mean? BUT...I stayed strong and I did not respond...and I will not respond. That is a very big step for me. I do not think it is sincere and I think it is just manipulation again. I wish he hadn't sent that though. It put a damper on my day when I was trying NOT to think about him. One additional update....I did find out this week that both he and the skank were fired from the company they were working for...for very sketchy reasons in my opinion...just a coincidence??? So maybe he is starting to realize how badly he has screwed up his life??? Well thanks for listening friends! I truly appreciate it! PS-I am trying to make it through the whole day without crying...although I started to at dinner when they brought me a piece of cake with a candle and everybody sang to me. I HATE going through this!!!
  6. update on --> w ww.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1468878#post1468878 yeah, yesterday I logged into msn and she wrote... Her - hi, u know what I was thinking about today? Me - what? Her - that I owe you a visit to the movies (last year I payed for her ticket for the movies) Me - haha oh yeah I payed for your ticket back then... Her (waited about 40 sec to reply) - how is everything? ...right after she wrote that, my computer got ****ed up so I had to restart it! when I came back online I started the convo and apologized and told her that I had to restart and I asked her what she was saying before I left and she replied "how is everything?" and she asked how my day was..you know the casual talk.. my question is, does this mean she's interested or what???? and another thing, she asked me when my birthday is, (coming up soon) and I "guess"...wait, I know she will buy me a present...are these good signs? and what should I do?? I think I made a mistake not bringing back up the "I owe you a movie visit"!
  7. So we have been seeing eachother casually for 10 months, but very serious for 4 months. We have every indication that we are going to be together for a very very long time. I am 28 and she is 19. She is so much older that 19 however. She looks and acts the part of someone 25. ANyway, her birthday is coming up March 16. I told her I obviously wanted to spend her birthday with her and I asked her to go out of town with me for the weekend. The weekend would involve quite a bit of alone time, but during the mornings I would have softball games. She loves softball and loves watching my games. She said sure right away and then a few days later said it would be a bad idea cause she wanted to be home for St. Patty's day cause that is when her friends would probably celebrate her B-day. I had NO problem with this whatsoever and told the team I was not going to the tournament and that was that. I'd rather be with my girl anyhow! She is very sensitive about her age and she has 2 roommates who both think she is 20 and about to turn 21. She never told them this, but never corrected them either. They kept bringing up going out to the bars that weekend. Well, she was getting nervous and wondering what they would have planned. A month or so passed and just 2 weeks ago she says to me "hey, you really want to go to that tournament, don't you?" I said "I'd like to, but spending your birthday without you isnt an option". So she says, "lets go to the tournament...it'll be fun, plus I wont have to worry bout my roommates!" I said like 5 times over the next 2 days "Are you sure, are you sure" and she kept saying "yes". Well, the closer it gets, the more I realize I should have just said "no" to going to the tournament. She isnt as excited as she would normally be for an out of town weekend. So, I know I have to hit another HR with a gift or plan for her B-day! I hit HR's with Christmas and with Valentines Day. She loved the gifts. I got her a Claddaugh ring from Ireland with her birthstone for V-day and for X-mas I got her several things, including a picture that I made for her that professed my love for her. It was framed and she loved it. I picked up on all the little hints thru the month and got her everything she wanted! For her b-day I was gonna take her to get her 2nd tattoo (and I'll still do that) but I need something for the weekend! We will arrive at the hotel around 10pm friday night (the night of her b-day). I am lost and am looking for romantic type, melt on the spot type of gift or something...ANY HELP?????
  8. Hey all, I have a long distance relationship with a boy my own age. I live about 300 miles from him, he's from London. He has a friend called Luke who I met first online and we chatted a lot of the time on MSN as friends although Luke fancied me a lot. I met Luke twice before meeting my boyfriend. Anyway on my third visit I met his friend (who is now my current boyfriend) who I hit it off with really well and we ended up going out. My partner knows his friend fancied me from the start. Since I've been going out with my other half he seems keen to keep me away from Luke and all his mates. I don't get why? Does he feel insecure? He keeps worrying about losing me although I have assured him countless times it wont happen. Anyway it's my 18th birthday next Friday so I'm going to visit my boyfriend and I was hoping to maybe hang out with Luke and the others since I never got that opportunity to last time. When I brought it up, he seemed to go quiet and cold on me. I had a bit of a falling out with Luke last weekend and I started calling him a jerk to Dan* and now that I've said I want to see him, he doesn't understand why when I was complaining about him a couple of days ago. I can understand him wanting to keep me to hiself on my birthday which is why I agreed to spend it alone with him, all I asked was, was if I could maybe meet up with Luke and he said "you was complaining about him a couple of days ago and now you want to hang out with him, I don't understand you". I have known Luke longer that Dan and although thats not the point, I would like to see him. He is just a mate. I don't know how to confront him about it without causing an argument. I just want to sometimes see Luke and his mates when I come for a visit. Am I being unreasonable here? If not, how can I resolve it without it becoming an argument? Lost here. Thanks for reading, -Miya-
  9. a friends birthday is cuming up and i am lost as to what to get.. i like her and she knows it.. but she has a boyfriend and they are really happy together and i want it to stay that way.. this will also be a sort of a goodbye present since after her birthday, we only have a month before we will leave for universities - which are like on the opposite ends of the world.. i have only been talking to her fora month now so we're not that close but i still want it to be a gift she will remember.. i was thinking some jewelry(mecklace, earrings.. with a stone or something) but she might take that (or her bf) as a sign that i want to be with her.. (i have told a mutual friend that i juts want to be friends so she does know it...)....
  10. Just a quick one, if you are doing NC and feeling quite strong and happy with the situation, and its your ex birthday, would you send them a text/email just saying happy birthday? I don't want to appear like I don't care or have forgot. But I also don't want to give the wrong impression that I want to get back together. Any ideas?
  11. This is an email I received from a friend that I have feeling for, she knows this. Lately she has been somewhat more vocal about how she is feeling, I am not sure if this is towards just me or to everyone. Like the other day while chatting to her on MSN she decided to tell me that "u knw u mean the world to me rite" and "ur opion means soo much to me" and "coz u neva knw wat will happen i want u to knw dat u mean alot to me". Anyway the extract of the email... well anyway its her birthday tomorrow and I really have no idea about what to get her. However not so long ago she joked about me writing a peom for her. So I was thinking about giving her a little cheesy but fun peom? See here
  12. Greetings fellow travels, I have just recently joined this group. First off I want to thank all of you that have posted. Reading the posts has helped to show me that I am not the only one that is going thru a living hell, and I see others wanting to help others as well. There is a part of me that wants to find some magic cure to feeling bad. Yes, part of that is very selfish, yet, the caring part of me also wants to help others. I feel like I just want to explode and write everything that has lead me to this place. But, there isn't enough room. Instead, I would like to open with a simple and small cry for help. My life has been nothing more than a fight to stay alive since I was eight years old. I am now in my mid forties. I have been in and out of counseling and on meds since the 1984. My family says that they want to help, but they have their own drama. And the reality is, they actually bring me down. I have never had a relationship, yet I am told I am good looking and fun to be with. I am very good at my job, yet feel like I am ready to be fired each and every day. I am tall, in good shape, yet no one is interested in being with me. I am smart yet can't find a job that will allow me to do more than just get by each and every week. My birthday present to myself for my 39th birthday was a .357 in my mouth. I almost pulled the trigger....I now wish I had. Since then I have sold that gun, but wish I had it back. The self talk in my mind is destructive, yet I can't get the voices to stop. The physical and mental pain that I deal with every moment of every day, is over powering. I can not afford meds or counseling. I am, as I have been all my life....alone and lonely. The walls that I have built over the past 30 years are so high and think, I can't break thru them. I fear that I am too old to find someone to share what is left of life...and I will be forced to work jobs that don't pay enough to allow me to take care of myself. Is some of what I wrote above an absolute, yes. Are absolutes correct, hardly. I do know what I wrote isn't fully the truth, yet it is the way that I see it. My friends have been overkilled with my burdens to the point I can't keep any friends. All I want to do, is to wake up tomorrow dead. To those that feel that suicide is selfish....try living with the pain that I ( and others) deal with. Please stop telling me that there are paths to take that will help. I believe I have tried them all. I can't decide what I need more.....love, acceptance, or death. Thanks for listening...
  13. birthday today, no cards yet. reminds me of my 21st birthday which i also spent on my own. i was too embarrassed to spend it with my parents so i drove all the way to bristol for the weekend and lounged around in the park reading a book. i slept in the car and got sunburned and that was about it, still it was one of my happiest birthdays. i'm good at lying to myself. i drove back with the windows down and the stereo on full blast and convinced myself that everything was going to get better. not so.
  14. My bf asked me to write him a poem a while ago - he has read previous ones and liked them - but I couldn't write one on the spot. So i've been working on one, trying to get it done in time for his birthday (tomorrow!!). This is just the rough draft but if the one you loved wrote this for you, would you like it? You The shape of your nose The way your eyelashes curl Even all the hair your body grows It's everything about you When you make me laugh When you take my hand Even when you wink at me It's everything about you Your kisses leave me breathless I always shiver beneath your sweet caress You have a way of easing my mind My dreams are peaceful when we are intertwined My thoughts are never far from you My heart has decided To you it shall always be true I dream of the future More than I ever used to It's all because of you
  15. but all of a sudden i've started to avoid going to work. i cry at the drop of a hat infact I have spent most of the morning in my office bawling. i feel like i have no energy. I hate my body. I dont want to go out with friends anymore. I dont know whats going on with me. Or what I can do about it, but I just recently started to feel this way. I have a good job, i have SO many friends, I have plenty of good things in my life, but still i feel like i'm at the end of my emotional rope. Any suggestions on what may be making me feel this way? --i'll also add that my grandfather passed away in early december. a week before my birthday. my mother actually forgot about my 23rd birthday completely (which I understand) but she's still greiving and was put on antidepressants last week. MOnday, my mother found a lump in her breast and has to go in for a needle biopsy next tuesday. my dad found a lump in his arm last week and will also be having a biopsy done. My boyfriend has been asking me to move in with him, but he's a state away (he's an active member of the military) and I do want to be with him, but i'm scared that i wont find a job, or friends, or that he'll get sick of me. I also have a hard time with even thinking that I will have to leave behind my life long friends.
  16. Here is the deal and any advice would be helpful. I have been seeing my girlfriend for 2.5 years and things have been all and all good. We are both currently 27 years old for point of reference. After new years this year she told me that she needed time because she could not continue dating me if things did not change. I have always been very devoted to my work and work upwards of 60-80 hours a week, something that she knew from the get go. As things progressed in our relationship I stoped seeing her as often during the week because work was taking a toll on me. We would however always see each other Saturday nights and Sundays. In September of this year I started studying for the GMAT and told her that I could only see her once a week because I had to concentrate on the test. I think this was hard for but she dealt with it. After my test I was consumed with other things and even though work was slowing down I did not see her as much as could have because I was unsure about our relationship. The straw that broke the camels back was this new years eve. Her birthday just happens to be on new years as well and she really wanted me to be with her. In the past she has understood that I always hang with the same group on new years and it has never been a big deal. This year though it sent her over the edge. If I could change anything I would go back to that night and made sure I was there for her. After new years we met up and this is when she told me that I had exhausted her and she was unsure if she had the energy to continue. This made me realize my wrong doings and also made me realize how truly important she is to me. I really want to be with her but she says she needs time so that she can see if I really change. She told me that she thought I was going to walk away from the relationship when she said that she needed time. She also said that my reaction to her has blown her away in a good way but she still needs time. Anyway things have started to get a lot better, all of the above happened right after new years.
  17. the short version of my story is... i dated this guy for over 2 years, we broke up in june and after months of no contact, we got back together in october. from oct to dec things were going as well as they were before. we had a great relationship, we never fought and there was a lot of shared interests and trust between us. he broke up in june due to his own life issues like is job etc... and i respected that and gave him his space although it was really difficult. i accepted him back in oct because i figured since the break up was not based on reasons due to our relationship directly, it could still be salvaged. fast forward to my birthday on new years eve. we go to dc to visit mutual friends. i click on his phone to check the time and a message popped up that read "thanks for the flowers they were beautiful" before jumping to conclusions, i learned he gave them to a girl he was talking to this summer who recently had surgury. at this point i was confused with were i stood so i asked him about it. he then tells me he only sees me as a friend (while we were cuddling). i asked him what he is looking for in someone and his reasons were he prefers more of a girlier girl, someone who doesnt like football or can drink with the guys etc... i was really hurt by this because its not like my personality has changed in two years, he also said he cant see himself having kids with me. in my opinion, these reasons seem pretty lame. since my birthday, i have not spoken to him. it will be almost 2 months of NC, but i will see him in a week when im around the same mutual friends at college again. in a previous post a few months back, i asked advice on what to do when i see him. now, im more nervous than ever to see him because my feelings toward him are different. the first time, i was not angry toward him and i accepted the break up because i respected the fact that he did not lead me on, and now i cant help but see him as a liar and someone who took advantage of my feelings for his own selfish reasons. i dont think i deserve what he did to me and i dont know how to go about seeing him again. i guess the advice im looking for is do his reasons for breaking up seem legit? and if you were me, and you heard these reasons, how would you approach seeing him after 2 months of not speaking? thank you kindly for your time and advice.
  18. So just after Christmas my boyfriend told me that he thought we needed some time apart, he said he needed to sort himself out and just needed his own time and space. I took it quite hard because he couldn't tell me why, and there were no signs that there were anything wrong, and he admitted that if i asked him straight out he would have probably said everything was fine. 5 weeks past and now we are 'taking it slow', but it's going pretty fast for slow, not that I mind.. it just confuses me as he mentioned that eh thought we needed to talk less (we did talk every day for quite a few hours each day).. but since I saw him for the first time since the break on my birthday (3 weeks ago) he has been hot and heavy, wanting me to stay at his longer then planed, like 3 or 4 days longer (i live an hour away from him) he asks me to go to his every weekend now, he emails me almost as much as he used too and this week we have talked every night so far (well not for as long as normal but still). He is also talking about marriage, buying a house together and when we have kids.. we used to talk about that stuff before but he is overly excited about it all, again.. i don't mind, it's just confusing since he wanted to take it slow and now we are back to talking about marriage and looking for a house together... and men think women are confusing!
  19. Here is the deal and any advice would be helpful. I have been seeing my girlfriend for 2.5 years and things have been all and all good. We are both currently 27 years old for point of reference. After new years this year she told me that she needed time because she could not continue dating me if things did not change. I have always been very devoted to my work and work upwards of 60-80 hours a week, something that she knew from the get go. As things progressed in our relationship I stoped seeing her as often during the week because work was taking a toll on me. We would however always see each other Saturday nights and Sundays. In September of this year I started studying for the GMAT and told her that I could only see her once a week because I had to concentrate on the test. I think this was hard for but she dealt with it. After my test I was consumed with other things and even though work was slowing down I did not see her as much as could have because I was unsure about our relationship. The straw that broke the camels back was this new years eve. Her birthday just happens to be on new years as well and she really wanted me to be with her. In the past she has understood that I always hang with the same group on new years and it has never been a big deal. This year though it sent her over the edge. If I could change anything I would go back to that night and made sure I was there for her. After new years we met up and this is when she told me that I had exhausted her and she was unsure if she had the energy to continue. This made me realize my wrong doings and also made me realize how truly important she is to me. I really want to be with her but she says she needs time so that she can see if I really change. She told me that she thought I was going to walk away from the relationship when she said that she needed time. She also said that my reaction to her has blown her away in a good way but she still needs time. From the get go she made it clear that we were not broken up, rather she just needed some time to figure out if she could continue and I could change for good. Do you think this is over or do I just need to show her change???? We still talk multiple times a day and she still tells me that she loves me. She also says that we should only see each other one night which includes staying the night together a week for now. In the mix of all this she recently started a new job. What do I do? I don't want to smother her but at the same time what drove her away was my lack of attention and availability. All of this I wrote at the beginning of January right after it happened. I will post a follow up right after this.
  20. In work I get on with most people but I've never had a good rapport with this one guy. I find him over the top, attention seeking and annoying. I've never said so to anyone at work because most like him because he's outgoing. Most of the guys humour him whereas I just try and get on with my work. He finds me a bit annoying too and prefers people who can follow up his one liners with a witty response whereas I'm quieter and not fantastic at the one liners. Unfortunately for me he is fast becoming the main guy in the office on a social level. He is now best friends with my best friend in work which as you can imagine is awkward. They are meeting up outside work and socialising but I'm not included because, in my friend's eyes, I'm not fantastic at drinking. Obviously my work colleague is glad because I'm never involved. He is now moving into a house near work with three other people including one other work colleague and my work friend's best friend. This again is helping him get a hold over things. This weekend I believe is his birthday and before he left he couldn't resist saying 'I'll see some of you tomorrow night (for the birthday bash) and the others I won't see I'll see on Monday'. Obviously he never invited or mentioned this to me and then proceeded to invite one of the elder staff members out to his birthday party -basically only to make a point of inviting someone else in front of me. There were only two of us left in work then and again he said 'I'll see some of you tomorrow night and the others I won't see I'll see on Monday'. He is so catty and * * * * *y with his remarks, always looking to leave me out of things. Yeah OK we don't get on fantastically but is there a need for these * * * * *y schoolgirl type remarks and actions? I have never given him the satisfaction of saying something or being jealous or acting left out when he's been inviting my best friend at work out because I don't want to give him the satisfaction but oh boy he's still trying his best... I can see the workplace soon becoming his gang (apart from me) and I really want to get out before this happens while I've still got some friends left. I know he'd be delighted if I left which would mean he would win but it's not something I want to stay around for. Any advice on what I should do? Please..
  21. Has anyone experienced this? I have been in NC for almost 2 months. I don't initiate contact, but she almost always emails me after big events. Day AFTER my birthday, day AFTER valentines day. And usually, when I respond with any type of questions, she won't write back. She asks me questions, and I always answer them upbeat and friendly...yet the same questions back to her go unanswered. I want to get back together. She dumped me for another guy after a fight. Most people say that she is regrets her decision...I just dont get it. We never had a relationship like this. For 4 years, we had a fantastic time...now, we are almost like strangers.
  22. i'm struggling......i had a late night text to her about a month ago.....she sent me an email ripping me....tellingme to leave her alone.....now mind you 3 weeks before i sent that she sent me an email how much she missed me and ctied every night.......when i do it....wham.....its been NC since.....my birthday passed and nothing... i talked with her bro yesterday ....i guess the girl i have been hagning out with has gotten back to her hence maybe why the tone change in her... i dont know....he was like you know i am sorry that things didnt work out....(he asked if i was dating again...then he brought the girl up which we are only friends anyway) i said dude its been hard.....he said she askedhow ou are doing etc....and she does miss you... i laughed my life is hell once again i am struggling to get back on top of my business.....get my emotional sense back.....the girls i talk too....they are a waste i am moving out of the house i sold for her.....(moving in with my brother)....i am hurting
  23. I made a party for my birthday and among the guests I invited a guy I like and I think he likes me but is too shy to make a move. Everyone came with a cute little gift like inexpensive wine or chocolate or stuffed animals. He came with really expensive bottle of wine(an expensive champagne to be exact),like everyone noticed how special it was. Would a guy bring this kind of gift if he wasn't trying to impress me or show me he thinks I'm special? Would you bring a special gift to a girl you weren't interested on?
  24. Hello my friends After a month of NC, I sent an e-mail to my ex because she started to text me (full story here). Her birthday is next 2nd March and I really don't know if I should call her. I've told her I wouldn't but that I will be thinking of her. She told me I could do it but if I don't she will understand. I have no hopes about this relationship and I don't feel like calling her. But I would like to keep her friendship in a near future (I don't know how much is this "near future"). If I call her probably it will give me a hard time but if I don't she might become upset and it will give me also a hard time. What would you do? E-mail her instead of calling? I've told her I wouldn't call because it will give me a hard time 'cause she probably strat asking things about my life, you know how is it... by other hand, if I call her, I don't want her to think I'm doing it just because she asked...she might think I'm being needy and, since I realized I was acting like that during our relationship, I don't want go that way. Your sugestions would be really wellcome.
  25. i was in a short but extremely intense relationship with someone last year. it was my first real relationship, in some ways ever, but definitely in at least a decade. because of our work schedules quite a lot of it was long-distance, but it became intense before we started traveling so much. there were also some health issues she had that i think heightened things. we had some problems for sure but also a sense of deep connection. we kept telling ourselves that we had to slow things down, that thing were too intense. well, they were -- and after a fight over the telephone we essentially broke up (when we were both in town we had a very nice but sad real breakup in person). i was frustrated by this b/c i felt that we hadn't really given ourselves a chance to just be in town together and try, but it was mostly her call. she's not perfect, of course, and in some ways we're extremely different, but we were both taken aback by our immediate and deep connection (and discussed it... to death, in retrospect). we were no contact for several months, and recently had dinner. i think it went better than either one of us had expected, and i definitely sensed that we were both still attracted to each other (emotionally as well as physically). at the same time, she asked if i was seeing anyone and told me she'd recently met someone while visiting home, which is on another continent. we decided to see each other again sometime soon. after this, i started thinking about talking with her about hanging out more often - with sex off the table to begin with, since one problem seemed to be that we leapt right into the deep end without doing any of the normal stuff like meeting each other's friends, doing activities together, etc. i wanted to just do that stuff and felt she might be amenable. i never made the call though - thought i'd try hanging out with her one last time. in the meantime, she has a big 40th birthday coming up this week and i called and she told me about her birthday plans. last week she emailed to ask if i'd gotten the party invitation and dropped the fact that her new friend would be there for the party. (um, no, it seems i was inadvertantly left off the invite list.) she seemed to carefully drop this info casually, and peppered the email with smiley signs which is not her usual style! she definitely has some commitment issues so i have a feeling that the friend surprised her by flying in for the party... or maybe she just took a chance on it. i don't know if i want to go to this birthday party or not. i really wanted to go before i heard that the friend would be there, but of course that's a big difference. at the same time, this is a big birthday for her and i know she really wants me to come. the crazy thing is that i know that she will probably be more interested in me if i don't come, but i don't really want to play that game. i was thinking of just dropping by for a half hour or so (looking great, of course). what i'd really like to do is bail on the party and take her out a week or so later, assuming her friend has split town by then. of course, the bottom line is that i want to go to the birthday party but don't really want to see her flirting with her new girlfriend. i guess i have to decide if i can handle that, since that will probably be the case. we can talk pretty honestly. maybe i should just call her and tell her i just don't think i can deal with it. thoughts?
×
×
  • Create New...