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  1. Hey everyone: This pass year, this girl be starring at me. She starred at me for like 1 year, so after that year, I ask her for her email address. Yes we be emailing each other alot. Everytime when we meet in person, or pass by the hallway, we usually look at our eyes before we say hi or talk. Last week, over instant messenger, one of my friend found out that I like her; so he told her over instant messenger that I like her. He told me that she said good stuff about me (like i'm nice, smart, funny, cool, etc...). I really don't know what to do next? Should I ask her out? Does she likes me? Thank you...
  2. Hello everyone. You probably know my saga by now. Met a guy..dated a month and a half...he left me because he said I didn't have enough of a sexual draw. This morning he sent me an email telling me he was sorry things didn't work out. Because we never made love he told me that he couldn't really have a connection with me. We were passionate together, but he wrote, "Pretending to have sex just didn't do it." He said he enjoyed the time he spent with me and he hopes I take care of myself because I was a sweet person. He sent me a bunch of romantic pictures...by the Pre-Raphaelites, my favourite. My question is....why does he call me sweetie and take on this fake caring attitude when he essentially told me I was undesirable and forgettable? I wish I didn't feel so hurt over all of this. I wish I could just shrug this off and forget about it. But I feel so damaged. By the way, thank you for responding to me....... Does anyone know why this guy is like this? Why he is so obsessed with finding a woman who will hop into bed with him on the first date? Is that really the only way to get to know someone? Why can't someone get to know your mind, your heart, your soul? He told me that his first and only girlfriend (12 years ago) wasn't sexually appealing to him, but after he slept with her it didn't matter because they created a physical bond. What about the bond of heart and soul?
  3. Here are the facts: 1. Went out on a 1st date 3 weeks ago - both of us had a great time (he confirmed this and also reiterated this to me a few times) 2. Both of us have been busy - we're in different grad school programs and last week was midterms - and have been unable to really connect again (or at least very limited communication - short phone calls or emails) 3. I had an evening planned with my buddies for Fri nite and invited him - he accepted and seemed to be looking forward to hanging out 4. Evening comes...he's stuck finishing a paper (took longer than he expected)....but he was going to finish and meet us 5. We already finished the 1st part of our evening (8:30PM now) and moved the party to a 2nd location - I call to check in and let him know. He apologizes for being so late and will meet us at 2nd location - asks if he can bring his buddy (of couse, no problem) 6. 2nd location....it is now 9:30 and he is not yet there....he calls says that he is done with paper and buddy is picking him up..will be at the location by 10PM (again apologies) 7. 10PM - still there at location (hmm....I am annoyed) and no phone call - but of course by this time, I am irritated and will not be bothered to call 8. 11PM - party breaks up...still no sign, no phone call. Girlfriends all say don't bother calling him...he's rude to not have checked in by now...so I don't call....and am fully annoyed 9. 11:20 he calls...says he's at the location but doesn't see me...I proceed to tell him that we've left...was not a byatch about it...just very matter of fact. He seems now very sheepish and rather uncomfortable. Apologizes again...and again....tells me that this is really not how he wanted it to turn out...he really wanted to see me...but his buddy that went to pick him up was in bad shape and needed to talk......blah blah blah...sorry sorry sorry...I tell him that I understand that things come up...but I didn't appreciate that he kept me waiting the entire time and did not bother calling me - that was rude. Told him that he's got some major points to score back..... 2nd chance? Do I make peace offering? What to do?
  4. Hi guys, I guess this fits into this category, but i'm not totally sure. Anyway, on to my latest problem: About three weeks ago i started talking to a girl who contacted me via online personals (not the girl I was posting about at that time, but coincidentally someone else entirely). Thigs have been going pretty good, its basically long distance for now as she goes to a college about an hour and a half away and neither of us owns a car. For the last three weeks we've been conversing via email and Im, which has been going great, we exchange fairly long emails with ewach other at least once a day, and when we talk on IM its usually for several hours at a time. So based on that we decided to start talking on the phone, and had our first conversation friday, and just had another one today. These didn't go as well, I seem to freeze up when on the phone, and just can't think of anything to say at times other than "thats great' or "thats funny" or some other basic answer to what ever her topic was, although eventually we could get a decent conversation going, but sooner or later i would go blank again. Each conversation lasted only about 30-45 minutes, with her ending both conversations. I got the impression after the first conversation that she thought I was losing interest, so the next day i sent her an email letting her know that i'm not the best phone conversationalist. One of the things we have discussed periviously is that we both suffer from a great deal of social anxiety, especially when meeting new people. She seems sympathetic to my problem, and willing to be patient while i try and acclimate myself to talking with her on the phone (I rarely talk on the phone beyond calling family or someone to meet up to do work during the school day). I'm glad she's being understanding, but i don't want to leave her bored while i search for something to say, and i don't want her to have to carry every conversation we have. So can anybody give me any tips on how to better conduct myself on the phone? Its not like I don't have things to talk to her, its just that i can't seem to come up with anything good while i'm talking to her. I'm guessing as with any other anxiety issue i've faced, it will get better the more i talk with her. Any advice would be helpful, mtastic
  5. Hey everyone. I'm feeling kinda down and just need some friendly encouragement. Aside from being a nutritionsist(my day job) I am also an actor. I've done it forever, but unfortunately due to financial and family issues I've had, I haven't done it in a while. I recently decided to get back to it and did my first audition in a long time. I felt really proud of myself, because I prepared really well and had a killer audition. I felt very confident about it until I got an email yesterday saying that they regretted not being able to use my talent for this particular season, but that they sincerely appreciated my audition and wished me success. And also enocuraged me to audition next year. I am not really crushed or anything(I have another audition in couple weeks) but just disappointed and need some encouragement. I start questioning my talent and place in life. Any friendly words would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance.
  6. I have read almost a million posts on here and everything that has been said has fit my sitch. we were together for 14mo. me 28 she 24. going through a rough time the arguing. she secrelty removed her belongings from my place, started talking to ex flings, began to avoid me so we had the talk. i could tell she couldn't hold it in any longer. during the talk we both cried and said our love yous. i gave her a letter I had typed up earlier in the day to take with her, but i also read it for he wheeping. Her reasons were that I said things she just can't forget, which i owned up too. She said she still loves me, felt like she was making a mistake, she was confused. I of course was supportive towards her decision, but told her I didn't want to give up on us. Told her I didn't want it to end, but if that is how she felt than that is what she needed to do. Beginnig that night I found this board and read about NC so I started NC right away. Now what I need advice on: Although I found out today that my mom sent her an email the day after we split talking about how much my parents would miss her and how much she meant to them and how devastated i was. Well I guess my ex responded and it was really high level. for instance she thanked them for the kind words they had for her. She would miss them also and would like to keep in touch. my ex said she would never erase the memoris and would miss them. she also said she is in a bad spot right now because she had tons of emotions swirling around in her head. Then my mom tells me that she emailed her back that she was like the daughter she never had and that she would always be there for her. My mom also told her about a trip I paid for to surprise my ex, which I got the deposit back for, and I know my mom didn't know it was a surprise because i didn't tell her it was. my mom thought my ex knew and wanted her to know I was a good man and would return her part of the money. Althought didn't know of the plans and my ex didn't need to know this and now she does. the ex and I would always take trips that we planned together, which I know my mom only assumesd. my mom also told her that if she moved on that was great and they were happy. She also mentioned to her how breaks can be good for relationships. My mom finally told me this today because she felt bad and wanted to let me know she would not email my ex again unless my ex contacted her. Even though it has been two weeks since my breakup, my mom wants me to move on, quickly. After that long story, I guess I want to know if my mom screwed whatever chance I have at self pride. Also let me know if relatives can break the NC rule and it be okay? I know my mom had good intentions. Let me know your thoughts and if you ever experienced this sort of situation before. I had dated exs where their ex boyfriend's parents still kept in touch. BTW I haven't heard from my ex since the night we broke up.
  7. so things kind of ended at beginning of the month. but we know we still love each other. and we're good friends, so still been in contact. past 4 days, she's been having breakdown, over personal things. and i know she doesn't talk 2 anyone about it, but she at least talks 2 me about most of it. so we've been txting every nite till very extreme hours until she sleeps for a few hours and then start txting again. i've been sticking by, supporting her and reassuring her. she even rang the nite b4 last. i know i cheer her up. the 1st nite i said i'll go over and c her in the morning, she didn't say yes/no so i didn't. then at nite when she rang, she asked y i hadn't turned up so i said i don't know. so yesterday, her being back at work, i assumed things would get better. she even emailed me from work to c how my day had been and told me 2 enjoy my evening. when i emailed back, i realised she wasn't in a gd state once again. however this time i asked wot happened......but perhaps it was cos she was at work, she didn't mention wot happened. so i didn't push on. again i said if u need anyone i can come and c u. no direct response again except 'thank u' so i didn't go. after midnight she txted to say she just got home from seeing clients. and said she was depressed, i didn't ask wot was wrong cos i assumed i wouldn't get an answer. and she didn't call so i left it to her. she txted so i replied and told her 2 let me know how she feels in morning when she wakes up. then at half 2am, she txted to say 'nite' so obviously she was still thinking bout me. i eventually txted when i knew she was asleep and said just give me a yes/no answer in the morning as 2 whether u want me 2 come and c u. so this morning, she said 'no to ur question, not the right time. time i need 2 be on my own. love 2 c u sometime but not in these circumstances.' she even signed off with 'xxx' as opposed to the 'x' i usually get nowadays. so i'm just confused........y would she not want 2 c me if she loves me so much? i wanted 2 c her solely as a friend. but each time we do c each other, something ends up happening, but its always her who makes the move, so i wouldn't just start kissing her or anything. i just want 2 make sure she's ok cos she just drinks and smokes when she's home from work. does her txt mean its all over between us? usually she always wants 2 c me, so i'm not sure whether she really does just need time on her own or what? cos when i'm depressed, its true to say i want 2 be on my own in my room, but i'd see my closest friends for a little while. so i don't understand what she wants. obviously i replied that 'it's fine, i understand' but just want to know wot u think she's thinking. and where do i stand? if she didn't care or want 2 hear from me, she shouldn't be txting or emailing or calling me......and now that i am helping her, with her saying 'thanks 4 caring 4 me....thanks 4 being here etc' she doesn't want 2 c me! any responses from u guys would be nice, thanx!
  8. The highlights: Brother introduced me to a girl about in early November, spent 2 weeks E-mailing and talking over the cells, spent the T-day break together, spent the next few weeks e-mailing and celling, spent the 3.5 weeks of xmas/semester break together, had the talk about me being here for one last semester (4 hours from Mpls/St. Paul) and she was onboard, she surprised me by coming out here for 3 days after I returned from the break, and than it started to fall apart. She stated that we moved to fast, didn't establish a friendship and she needed her space. Hmmm, what was the 4-plus weeks talking establish and if we moved too fast why didn't she slow things down? Okay, my two conclusions and these are just my opinions: 1-I was a BF of connivance and she was along for the ride, never had any true feelings, if she did, they weren't enough to sustain "us." 2-She could not handle the distance and decided to end it as easily as she could 3-She is waiting to see if I end up with a job in the TC's and than she will pursue another relationship with me, which just tells me that she cannot handle difficult situations in relationships AND likes them to run as smoothly as possible. Heck, relationships are tough, but why make them any more difficult? So, what do you think? Did we move too fast or was I option number three? Oh, she wants to do the friendship thing, but I personally find it difficult to move to a friendship state after being in an intimate relationship.
  9. My ex and I continue to be friends and we email each other frequently though she is "Happilly" married... Often in her emails she will write a sentence and exclude the word "I". Here is an example Me: "Are you going to be online later?" Her: "should be at some point" I often read alot of emails from different people online who omit the word "I". Is she seperating herself from me in an unconscious way? I am just curious to know or hear advice.
  10. Alright, It's been 3-4 days since I sent an email to this girl I just went on a date with for the first time and I still havn't gotten a response yet. I was just wondering If I should call her or just take the hint that she's not interested because she hasn't written me back yet. This is REALLY hard because I actually really have feelings for this girl. I actually mentioned this to one of my girl friends and she said I should call because the girl might be upset that I just sent an email instead of calling her right away and that if she kissed me on the cheek she must have liked me at list a little bit...But then one of my guy friends said to just wait and let her come to me..if she wants me, she'll call me and if I call her she might think im stalkin her or something. I dunno..What do you guys think?
  11. Hi All, first post in a long while..I used to post here alot when I first broke up with my ex of 3 years ,1.5 years ago. It's been a long road but now fully healed and ready to find that special someone. I've dated alot since I've broken up with the ex , say about 10 women or so but for the past 3 weeks I've been dating this 1 girl in particular.. Thing is I haven't felt this way for a girl since my ex. all the other girls prior to her were just for fun but I actually really like this one but to be honest she is confusing the hell out of me.. So far we've been on 3 dates..first date we met up for some beers and chatted for 3 hours..she e-mailed then next day and said she had a good time and would like to get together again...So we did..2nd date was last Saturday and I took her out to dinner had a nice time then we rented a movie and went to her house to watch it and had some wine..good time as well..kissed her at the end of the night.. 3rd date was last night..she took me to the movies and we watched "Hitch" not bad movie by the way.. our conversation flows easily and laugh together often..anyways after the movie I dropped her off at home and in my car I wanted to kiss her again so badly but we didn't end up kissing.. told her thanks for the movie and she said she'd e-mail me at work today.. The question is I don't know how to read this girl...she confuses me..at times I think she's into me and times I don't think.. How should I play from here on then ? I'm new to this part actually.. meeting a girl I actually like alot since my ex.. Am I ready too much into things or what ?..lol
  12. I met a nice quiet (possibly shy) guy. We've been together 3 times. The last time I invited him over my house (nonromatic) for dinner. He seemed very comfortable and opened up and talked more than he ever had. I had a great time enjoying his company. We talked, laughed. It just seems like I'm initating the relationship. If I call him with the intend to just say Hi! or talk, he usually suggests that we get together. That's ok but why doesn't he call. I called him last Friday, and he told me he was busy that weekend and suggested that we possibly get together this weekend. Well, today is Friday and I haven't heard from him and I don't think it's appropriate for me to call him. Since I had invited him over my house, he has suggested that one of these weekends, he'll like to invite me over to his. I feel that he likes me and enjoys my company. I don't know if he's just slow or cautious or if he's even interested in a dating/relationship. If I email him, he's quick to response back. Some of friends think that because he's a quiet guy, he needs a little nudge but I think having him over my house for dinner should have given him a clue. My problem is I don't want to be the aggressor or seem like I'm chasing him. Any clues or hints? Thanks.
  13. my ex and i have have gone out for about 2 years and we broke up about a month ago. she wanted to have no contact with me until we got back to school which is in a few days. she instant messaged me a week ago asking what i was up to and when she was going back to school, i responded casually. yesterday she emailed me the exact date of when she was going. i did not reply to the email. i want to know how i should act or what i should do when i talk to her. she broke up with me b/c her mom doesnt approve of me(not because of how i treat her but more or less my ethnicity) her mom tells her that she shouldnt be commited right now she should to see other guys, she is gonna transfer to another school( just a few hrs away no biggie for me i can drive to see her when i can) and she wants more guy friends. so since she broke up with me i am still confused about which one is the real reason or maybe a part of all of them is real. the breakup caught everyone by surprise even her sister was surprised. things between us have always been GREAT but her moms disapproval of me really gets to her. i am also wondering what she thinks about other guys as well. i am her first serious bf and even while we were goin out guys hit on her and emailed her for dates n stuff, i did not act jealous or let it bother me cuz i know she loves me, but does she miss all the attention a single girl gets? maybe shes bored of me? i just dont know what to say or how to act toward her once we talked in a few days. we will have not seen each other for a month. need sum advice of what to do
  14. I will try and be as brief as possible. We met about 7 months ago. She is 4 1/2 years younger than me. She has two children in another state who live with their father. She divorced him over a year ago and left to get away from him but misses her children very much. We broke up at the end of April after an incident where I freaked out because I was insecure and it manifested itself when we couldn't get a table anywhere for dinner. She tried to reassure me but I clammed up. We did get together two weeks later, and since, we had been going back and forth between being completely in couple mode to just friends. Regardless, we have been intimate the entire time. However, there have been occasions where it seemed that we couldn't deal with it and would almost separate only to come back together. This whole time, she has been torn between wanting to stay here and be with me, or go back to her children. I am supportive of her being with her children and think we can work it out, she takes an "all-or-nothing" approach. She even told about three weeks ago that she was considering staying here for me. I have even offered to go with her and she actually considered it seriously until she decided it "would only make things more complicated". She is afraid her ex-husband may make it difficult for her to see her kids. We went to Mexico last month and we seemed to get very close. Since we have been back she has been increasingly unavailable. Two weeks ago, we had a terrible falling out, precipitated by alcohol, me being on medication and her seeking independence. We went out and insecurities built up and words were exchanged. The incident, in the end, really is not what concerns me as it was just an excuse for her to do what she did later. Last week, she called me up and I went over. We didn't discuss the previous incident but ended up sleeping together. Then, on Monday, she emailed me and said it was a "HUGE mistake"...and said it would be better if we didn't keep in touch anymore. She finished by saying "Good bye". However, she went out with my sister this past Friday, and told her the following: That she does this when she cares alot about someone (getting distant). She says that she is definitely moving back to xxxx in two weeks. She only had "good things" to say about me, that we had a lot of good times together. She appreciated my email from Friday. Her family here doesn't want her to go. She doesn't know whether to keep some stuff in here or not, whether to "keep a door open here". However she said she thinks what she did was for the best, in terms of saying good bye to me. My thoughts are that none of this is new. That one Saturday was just an excuse to make a clean break. I still want her back and think she is making an "all or nothing" thing out of this, either she go to xxxx and be with her kids, which means to her closing off contact with me, or she stay in xxxx and give her kids up and be near me. I am thinking of emailing her tomorrow telling her that my sister told me she is leaving in two weeks and that I would like to see her before she goes. Please help! I don't think its hopeless... Even last Friday, she seemed so into me then she sent that email the following Monday. I responded essentially telling her it was not necessary to end our friendship. Since Monday, I have used NC except to tell her it was nice of her to invite my sister out. Any advice would be appreciated.
  15. hi every1 - i dont know if this is the right area to post it but my name is teri , im 21 years old and i suffer from an extremely lowself esteem. ive tried many ways to help myself but nothing is working out. i fail in everything. my social anxiety is crippling to the point where i cant carry out a proper conversation. i feel very lonely and suffocated most of the time. my parents are both diabetic an im epileptic. i feel depressed and suicidal some of the time.ive had to drop out of school several times because of these problems- i cant bear using the bus, i feel scared. does any1 have any suggestions on how i can make friends? if so please email me at email removed
  16. Okay, so I met this girl online 2 weeks ago and sent messeges back and forth for a day or two, then we chatted. She told me she has never met and is not interested in meeting someone off the net. At the end of our chat, I now have her phone number and she wants to meet me. So she calls me later and reaffirms that she wants to "hang out". We meet. I took her to a lake to feed ducks. We talked a lot. Then we went out for some chinese, then went back to her place, and then walked to get some ice cream. Then we came back and watched a movie at her place. We didn't sit next to each other. She sat in her fav recliner and I sat on the couch. I REALLY wanted to ask if she'd sit next to me, but my instincts told me if she wanted to, and was comfortable enough, she would somehow move closer over time. Or she could just be shy and is waiting for me to ask her to do it cuz that's happened to me before as well. Anyway, the movie is over and we get online and we show each other's photo albums of when were were kids...and she showed me her parent's pictures and stuff. She gently kicked my foot a few times and then said "Oh, was that your foot?". lol Anyway, I asked if she wanted to go to the state fair with me...and she said she'd like it. Then we talked about going trick or treating together. And then I mentioned some other ideas, and she was ALL for doing those things with me! When I was about to leave, I opened my arms for a hug and she opened hers right back and we had a tight 2 second hug. I definitely didn't feel it was time for "the kiss" yet. I normally have a pretty good gut instinct on when to do thinsg. She had to leave town the next day for a few days, but I got a surprise text message of a smiley face from her. So I'm THINKING that she does like me for more than "just friends". I just need some affirmation. BECAUSE THIS GIRL SWEPT ME OFF MY FEET!!! And it would suck to be "just friends", but I would rather take that than nothing. What do you guys think? I also should mention that she emailed me the next day and said she had a fun time. She said that when we met, it felt like we were old friends. Is that a sign of "Hey let's just be friends" or does it just mean that she felt really comfortable around me for a first meeting and I shouldn't think much of it?
  17. Hi Everyone, I need some advice. I have my profile on a couple of personal sites. And I just received an email from a guy who wants the password to my picture. Now I'm not sure that I want to give him the password. And I would just say no. But this site is one of those that you have to pay to make contact, and I'd feel really guilty for not giving it to him but at the same time I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with giving it to him. Has anyone got any advice Please??? cass
  18. my former best friend and I are no longer friends. We were roomates for one year in college and we hit it off great. We hung out 24/7 and we had so much fun. We got to be so close that I considered her my sister vice versa. She was there for me a lot when my grandpa passed away and when I was having trouble with my bf. After I left that college and came home we had to talk on the phone or email and we didn't get to talk nearly as much as we would like to. Our conversations started to only be about her and when I would try to tell her what was going on in my life, she wouldn't listen. On top of that, she always gave me bad advice about my bf (this girl has never dated anyone, but she wanted to give me advice). She said horrible things like my bf is just making an excuse to break up with me. Everytime we talked she wanted me to break up wtih him even though she knows that i truly love him so much... she would not stop calling my house. She just would call way too much all the time and super early (there's a big time difference between hawaii and michigan and she always forgot about that). At first i'd have someone else answer the phone and tell her that i wasn't home. But then I answered the phone and told her to not ever call me again. I've changed my email and cell phone number to avoid her because I just think that she's being rude. My question is i don't know if i was too harsh on her. I've tried telling her before that she needs to listen to me, but she wouldnt'. She would have no problem running up my cell phone bills with her phone calls that were about nothing important. I guess i just feel bad... IF anyone could help, that would be awesome! thanks
  19. I am not sure if you were following my posts... well if not here is a brief summary.. I met thi girl about 4 times and everytime there is s different impression .. the first part which was hosted by jer wa sthe best by far.. that was the first party that I met her and she was pulling my hand constantly to the dance floor. the second party which was at another friends house .....well I didn't see that much attention from her maybethis time I was making more eye contact, and I really liked to get her attention.. the third time it was in dowtown Toronto with pretty much the same group of people. when ever I was looking at her she looked away!!! I made a joke about her and she really enjoyed that... and refer to it again later on in the evening ( i am trying to discribe it at the best of my ability) anyhow .. today was the forth time that I met her at a smaller party and I think that I am falling for her.. so I asked for her email address and she gave it to me... so now please be honest..with me .. when girl gives you her email address .. what is she implying..or atlease does it mean that I am moving in the right direction/..... I don't want to ask her out now( as i THINK IT'S GONNA RUIN EVERYTHING).. just wanna move into the frinedship zone first.. as I understand it's extremely important.. so pleas etell me what does all this mean.. does atleast have 1/25 of the interest that I have in her or she is just trying to be nice.!!
  20. Hi, this is a very confusing situation. I love this woman I met online 2 years ago. Certain things have happened during that time. She messed up things between us, but these things are from the past, I do not care about them at all. However I have recently sent her a few emails (she was on a trip at that time) where I told her I missed her and wished we could talk more often online. She felt I was accusing her of cheating on me, and that I did not trust her, and that I was putting too much pressure on her. It has been 3 weeks now that she is angry, she says she is not, but I can sense she is. She also told me she feels that I do not respect her and her opinions and that I think I have a moral superiority over her because she messed up things in the past. This is all untrue, I love her, I respect her and like her opinions. No matter what happened in the past. I have sent her several emails where I explained things and told her that she is wrong about me, that she should not be angry with me. We briefly talked last night (first time in a week) and I could sense she was still upset with me. There has also been some misunderstanding involved and I find it really sad that she is so upset with me because of some misunderstanding and because she sort of believes that I am someone (a macho, someone that "talks down to her") that I am NOT. What should I tell her when we talk to make her feel more confident about me ? Should I continue to email her or just wait and see until she calms down ? I would really need to find the good words to make her feel more confident about me and let her know that I listen to her, and trust her. She is so convinced that I am not listening to her and that I do not trust her that I feel the only way to proove her that I am not like that is to go see her, without telling her, and explain her face to face that she has been wrong to think these things about me. What should I do ? I would very much appreciate your advices and analysis of the situation. Thanks very much.
  21. hi my name is teri and im 21 years old- i have been suffering from social anxiety and boredom ever since i can remember. then at age 11 i developed epilepsy. i feel like i cant communicate to any1 and i hate the pressure i get from my dad most of all but i cant live without him either. both of my parents are diabetic. i have no family or friends. its impossible for me to make friends since i suck at everything. i constantly have suicidal thoughts and i cant make it goaway. i hate being at risk for every disease like cancer and diabetes- it runs in the family. its bad enough that i wear thick glasses and i have hair loss. ive had to drop out of school because of this. i feel like exploding. if any1is suffering like me or going thru social anxiety, please feel free to email me at email removed
  22. I posted a while ago about having issues with a friend of mine who wanted me to break up with my boyfriend and date a mutual friend of both of us after she discovered he liked me. A -lot- has happened since then, but the whole story is really long(I know because I typed it out and then decided to summarize Basically, neither me nor this guy handled the situation right and now, neither of us even want to be friends anymore. I told him I didn't want to be with him, he insisted I would "someday," I finally confronted him that I had meant my decision to stay with my boyfriend and we decided not to see each other for a while. I realized that just not seeing each other was not enough. You guys know the whole "no contact" thing, so I figured you'd understand where I'm coming from. Yesterday I asked him for space, I wish I had done it sooner, but I was uncertain of whether or not I could control the anger I was having towards this guy and just continue dealing with him, or if I needed to get away from him to deal with my anger. Earlier events of this week proved to me that I needed to just not talk to him for a while. I said as much in email yesterday and he said it was "too late" to ask for space... The thing is...I'm not really that upset. I actually feel...relieved. I was in a situation like this a few months ago where I did a lot of stupid things and ended up hurting a few people, one in particular. Looking back now, I realize all I did wrong, and those mistakes helped me from making the same ones this time. But that time I was really upset and a wreck for weeks if not months. This time...I ranted a bit in my online journal about the whole email "war" but after that, I felt free, like a huge burden was lifted from me. My boyfriend said it was because the guy was not only causing negative feelings in me, but was a very negative person in general. I'm just wondering if it's normal to feel this much relief after you lose a friend? Cause, while I'm reveling in the relief I feel...it seems like I shouldn't be so happy/relieved with what happened....
  23. I have been harping on about my relationship on this site for three months. being an overanalytical sort I planned carefully when I would break no contact. My only fear is that his email address was full because he didnt have access to it for four months. My question is if his email address is full will they automatically inform me or will I be here wondering whether he got the message or not?
  24. ok, quick question here I met a girl at summercamp, who I really liked, the only problem was that she lives in France, we wrote to each other for a while, then abruptly she stopped....almost a year passes with not a word, and all of a sudden, I get an e-mail from her 4 days ago, informing me of a new e-mail address, and asking her to e-mail her sometime. I sent her an e-mail basically saying whats up? hows your year been? and again no response? whatsup here?! -- Best Regards, Darknova
  25. latonia

    Am I Crazy

    I need an objective opinion about my situation right now. I have been married for over 13 years. About 3 years ago, my husband had sex with another woman in our home while I was at work (and videotaped it!) He moved out and after a 1 year separation, we decided to give it another try. About one year later, I discovered domination e-mail messages on his phone and in his e-mail. When I confronted him, he claimed that he was sending those e-mail messages to himself because he was afraid that I might be checking his e-mail and phone. Somehow we were able to get through that period. About one year later, I discovered more suggestive instant messages on his phone. He had been instant messaging domination type messages to a close friend of his who had relocated to another state. In addition to the domination info., he told her that he loved and missed her and she did the same. I confronted both of them. My husband stated that he felt that he did not deserve anything good in his life and needed to send these messages to release these feelings. He said that the friend agreed to play this domination role to help him. Due to a job change, we have now relocated to the same city where the "friend" lives. My husband is very playful with the friend (who happens to be married to another close friend). He claims that the friend and husband are like the family that he never had. Am I crazy to stay in this relationship and for believing all of this information? I just need some feedback. L.
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