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Lightingbird

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  1. Lightingbird
    Jade the first step would be for you to visit a college counselor and take a career assement test. This test will give you some ideas of what types of careers that might be good for your desires and likes in life. You have a place in life, but finding that place is the challenge. So keep looking and don't give up or smiling. Good luck to you.
  2. Lightingbird
    Being shy... You are still young. Confidence to avoid your shyness will come. When it does... Embrace it. Good luck to you.
  3. Lightingbird
    Leaving any job on bad terms will make it hard to return for future employment. Most companies now keep all past employees in their database. They list why they left and if they are rehire eligible. If you put in your two week notice but did not stick to that term you were more than likely listed as a "no rehire". In that case on in great exceptions can you be rehired. Be positive, things will work out for you either way. Good luck to you.
  4. Lightingbird
    Guilt, shock, and foolishness go hand and hand. Your ex-girlfriend loved you that is the only reason that she lied to you. Horrible as it may seem. She didn't desire to hurt you any more than she did. Also, in her mind, it makes her feel better that in your head that you might have some understanding how something could have destroyed your relationship rather than a destined to be doomed fling. Its good that you are a very faithful person. Keep being honest you will find the same soon. Be strong and good luck to you.
  5. Lightingbird
    There is nothing is wrong with sitting in front of your computer. It is simply something that you enjoy. It is a means of communication. The way of the future. Just as some enjoy sitting on the phone all day, you chose your online computer. So relax on that one. Once a week go out with your friends. Do something fun. The added fun will be great. The reason why you have the confusing feelings of one minute thinking you look nice and then the opposite the next is your own mental decision to think that. Remember reality, if you know you are beautiful. Then that is just it. You are beautiful. There may be days when you feel that way. During those days, take a longer shower, put on a nicer outfit, constantly remind yourself that you are beautiful. You can do it. Good luck to you.
  6. Lightingbird
    Finding new friends is not really hard just challenging. Join a group that supports your hobbies, ask some of your co-workers if any any of them enjoy what you do, look around in your church, or neighbors, try catching up with local old friends. Either way it will take some daring first steps but you will meet some new friends. Good luck to you.
  7. Lightingbird
    During your first six months in a new relationship. You will go through a refining period when you get rid of your old thoughts and feelings. Also, concerning your new relationship, after this time the illusion that both of you are presenting for one another should disappear and the real person should surface. This is a completely normal process. Now keep in mind this time frame is merely a educated guess. Are you sure that your old boyfriend could not treat you better? What I am saying did you tell him how you like to be treated? Show him how in different ways? Give him time to adjust and not yell or attack him when he failed? Please be sure that you did make a good decision before you spend any more time with your new boyfriend. Its not fair to either of you if you are not completely committed in mind and soul to him. Make the right decision. Good luck to you.
  8. Lightingbird
    Maybe your desires are more than your feelings have percieved you to think. Then again... You might still or have loved this man. Either way, the best route to look at all of this is with realism. Could anything have really grown from this? Could you two have had a real healthy relationship outside of your online relationship? At first glance it would seem that you were just mainly in a state of lust and the possiblility of love crossed your mind. This is quite a frequent event. Either way, take your time, think this out. Things will work out for you. Good luck to you.
  9. Lightingbird
    Fierce words Genesis.... But she is on the right path. At least consult your friend. Nothing would upset or hurt worse than finding out your friend is dating your former lover. Be an adult, act responsible. Is this attempt at love really worth your friendship? Do the right thing, good luck to you.
  10. Lightingbird
    Your friend sounds like he is afraid to risk the friendship as well. Well, one of you two need to make the decision to go forward and take the risk or simply leave the whole idea alone. There seems to be "no game" running just a bit of fear. Think it out. Good luck to you.
  11. Lightingbird
    Excellent advice Beindaz. Your desire for you old boyfriend is just your emotions acting out since you are lonely. Seeing your old boyfriend may be a mistake. You may see him, get a touch or a kiss, and then something will happen. Next thing you will be saying that you love him. Which of course really is you missing affection and swallowing all of it at once thinking its true love. When in fact you are starving and giving yourself an overkill amount of affection. Stay the course, seek counseling. Change your routine with your husband. Talk until your eyes turn blue. Find out more of how he feels. Save your marriage sometimes it will need one of you're to motivate the other. The whole image of love being a great and constant thing has been destroyed by mainstream media. Most lasting relationships are only happy 70% to 90% percent of the time. It requires work and a pick me up. Go get it. Tonight, invite your husband to bed and remind him why you married him. Nothing can compare to a rekindled love. Now go get it! Good luck to you.
  12. Lightingbird
    Congratulations on your new child. Firstly, you need to remove the red tinted glasses of love and put on the full color shades of reality. You as a new mother are about to enter a new realm of responsibility. The actions that you have presented him doing are a clear indication that he is either very confused or not at all very serious with his feelings for you. You need to be realistic and leave him alone. Things you should know. 1. Pregnant women are often the most time a woman can be abused mentally or physically. 2. Men or impeding fathers often share the stress and can see the coming child as a commitment or the end of their single lifestyle. 3. You emotion levels will triple while pregnant. In other words, you need to really slow down and think this through. You know he is hurting your and doing you wrong. You already know what is best and what you need and must do. Be responsible and find a man that will be more than glad to love just you with no surprises or betrayals. Good luck to you.
  13. Lightingbird
    The key is reality. Do you think that she has changed? Have you changed? What positive differences would come forward if you got back together? Are you sure you miss her and are not just lonely? Before you contact her think these things out thoroughly. The best thing that a person can do to win back an ex and make the relationship more fulfilling is to better them and try again. Only you and she know what caused the relationship to fail. But bettering would only enrich your love if you get back together. Contacting her to say hi or ask how she is doing is good. At least this will keep contact open but at the same time don't put your heart on the floor. Wait, plan, and make your move at the right time. But before you do anything! Think this all out completely. Good luck to you.
  14. Lightingbird
    Whatever you do, just break contact, and be straightforward if he asks any questions, but ya should break contact, now, of course other people will have opinions, and maybe even better ones at that, but if those opinions don't work, try mine i guess, or invent a solution but do not wallow in despair hoping that he might come back some day, that is not right to yourself at all This is exactly what I was about to tell you. Don't live in Disney. If you know nothing will come of this and since he in fact does have a new girlfriend. Please don't kid yourself. The road before you will be hard. But the first step is giving you room to breath and a fighting chance. Cutting ties would be the best bet. Good luck to you.
  15. Lightingbird
    Well the first thing you should do is go to your local adult store and get some aids to help you out. I am sure there is some sort of medical aid that you can purchase to help you on your quest. You might even what to consult a doctor if your urge for this is that severe. Good luck to you.
  16. Lightingbird
    Well said KyokuKazeno
  17. Lightingbird
    Yes you should step up and do something. Whether you realize it or not that did affect you. It molded you in a certain way. It affected your mindset and your personality. Confront this woman first and bring it to her attention. Then tell the child's parents. This is your responsibility as a adult and as someone who went through this personally. Noone should lose his or her childhood to a abuser. By the way, If I missed something.... Please reread what you typed in the future. It was really hard to understand. Good luck to you.
  18. Lightingbird
    Dreading death will drive you insane if you focus on it. Death is a experience that we must all share. As in birth a very, very small percentage can remember being born. Death will be an transition that will not be horrible. You should lean on your personal beliefs. Don't let fear control you or ruin your life. Now with that.. get on with your life. Stop focusing on the end and live today and enjoy the life you have! One more thing, if you feel that someone is truly going to hurt you. You should involve the police. Take the treat seriously. Good luck to you.
  19. Lightingbird
    Take your boyfriend to counseling to see if there is more going on that you know about. Also... Discuss with him things that may upset him and ask him if he makes you unhappy anymore. Don't give up things will get better.
  20. Lightingbird
    Open your eyes and see the truth. Is this woman that he went to movies with a friend that you have met or heard of from a prior conversation? If not, then he may have been on another date. This would explain his sudden change in behavior. Confront him about his change in attitude and feelings. If he does not give you a good reasonable response, then be realistic... People often know the truth in a relationship, but lie to themselves. Don't allow yourself to be abused. Think about it. Good luck to you.
  21. Lightingbird
    Learning to view the truth behind colored glasses is a very difficult thing to do. My friend, it seems that you friend is a very open minded woman. She may be interested in you but also interested in others. Since you have an attraction towards this woman and embraced all of her actions personally. There are a couple of things that you need to do. 1. Firstly, advise her of your feelings. Tell her that you are interested in getting to know her better. If she shares an interest, then tell her what is bothering you. If she does not share you interest or she is just not looking for ONE man in her life right now. Don't get upset, respect her views and if you can, remain her friend. 2. If you cannot confront her about your feelings. Then perhaps you should not spend any time with her to further allow your feelings to be hurt. This also would apply if you tell her your feelings and she does not share the interest or the desire to commit to one man. Either way, please protect yourself; don't allow this to continue to bother you. Make a move quickly and control your feelings. Good luck to you.
  22. Lightingbird
    Your decision is simple. Since you are not in love with him or not sure please do something that you did not mention at all, in nothing that you just wrote. Think of your former lovers feelings. You might want to cut all ties with your current boyfriend. Let him go so that he can live his life and not spend another day behind a woman that does NOT share his feelings. Please handle your current situation before you try to backup into your ex-boyfriend. A possible reason that he may not be responding is the same type of feelings that you are putting your current boyfriend through. It lacks respect. It shows selfishness. It says that you are not in control or your feelings. All of these may be wrong but be considerate of others feelings. Sorry on this board, you will not get what you desire to read, but rather what you need to see. Make the right decision. Good luck to you.
  23. Lightingbird
    Discover how she feels about being kissed, before you make your move. You should ask her questions about kissing. Try to determine if she is ready for that type of move from you yet. If you feel comfortable enough then by all means lean over and kiss her. But try to pick your moment. Women love to remember things, so with that in mind, try to make it special. Good luck to you.
  24. Lightingbird
    It might be that her father is detecting your next move. Besides, she is his daughter. A mans child is a very precious thing to keep protected. If you are serious about marrying this young woman, your next step might be best to seek out a counselor to discuss this marriage thing. Marriage is a big step and even though you are playing a big engagement, you both are at the pivot able points in your lives. Try talking to him more about yourself and show him that you are more of a person without his daughter. In other words, don't kiss up to him. Be yourself. Speak of your goals in life. Search out and try to see if you have anything in common with him. If you do, use that. Please take your time. Good luck to you.
  25. Lightingbird
    Letting go requires alot of work. It will not be easy. And you may never forget her or be able to some extent let her go. But you can make it. What you need to do is to pick up some new hobbies and try to fill up all of your thinking time with other activities. It sounds like you have lost your idenity with this woman. Moving on, means just that. Start a new workout plan, spend time with your friends or family, pick up a new hobby or just try to be more active in your personal life. It won't be easy, but you can do it. You may never get over her and you need to accept that. You loved her and you had something special. Use that to fuel your future to find someone else that you shared similar interests with and strive to make things better next time around. You will make it. Good luck to you.
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