Zig

I appreciate all of the replies, specialy the one about renting the meet the parents movie. I seen that movie and it was really funny. Her dad isnt like him though, he acts really nice in public and to other people be just seems to be two faced at home. I dont want to steal her away from her family I want to be appart of it but her dad has already said he doesnt even want to get to know me or even try to be my friend and I havent done anything for him to act that way, so I have a feeling its more or less what Gilgamesh said about him still thinking that she is a little girl. I dont think it has much to do with what you said poltergeist about him worrying about her getting pregnant because the few times that he has let us spend time togeather we were alowed to go off on our own. I have a true love waits comitment card that I carry around in my wallet that I signed on 6/13/01 which basicaly says im going to follow gods plan of staying abstinate till im married. The idea of it being ok because boys cant get pregnant is a horrible idea and really offends me. It just reinforces the idea that its ok for guys to act that way and be sexist pigs and that if they have a kid its the girls problem because she didnt say no. Its just as much of the guy's responsibility as it is the girl's That kind of thinking is very crude and selfish. Anyways, I was wondering about something, when I buy her an engagement ring am I supposed to get one for me too or is she supposed to buy one, or is it not really nessary for me to have one. Im not much on wearing rings anyways but I guess I could get used to it. Anyone else have any comments or suggestions? Sorry about all my post being long I just have a lot to say.

Well I apreciate your advice but it doesnt really help me that much and Ill explain why. Her dad doesnt want to have anything to do with me. I was going to start going to her church every sunday morning with them but her dad told her that he didnt want to be buddy buddy with me and that if I kept coming he would eather stop going to church or find a new one, and they got him to start going so i have no choice. It really makes me mad too because I want to see her at chuch not simply for the fact of seeing her but to keep god at the center of our relationship. Im wearing a mezpah neckless right now and she has the other half. The scripture on it is Genisis 31: 49 if you dont know what im talking about. To me her dad seems to treat her like more of an object or possesion or mabey an accomplishment, epecialy after I heard today what he said to her one time that she is "bad for his heath" and that really made me mad. They dont seem to keep her brother to the same standard as her eather. Hes only 14 and they alow him to talk to his girlfriend as much as he wants and to see her regularly from what I understand and he has only know the girl for a short while so I dont know what her dad's problem is but I have done everything I can to show him that Im not a bad person. In the past few months I have gotten my own car, my full lisciense, and a good job working at walmart to please him so that I could see her, but apperently it isnt enough. His main defencive argument is that hes worried she is going to get so wrapped up with me that she wont go to college but that isnt even an issue because she really wants to go and I woudlnt let her not go. On top of that he threatens to not let her go to college so he seems to be really hippacritical about a lot of things he says. I have thought about getting married to her for a long time now and im absolutely sure that this is what I really want. Since about the time of Valentine's day of this year Ive been thinking about it and I see my self haveing the means to do it so I am going to go through with it. Thank you for you time and words moderator. Anyone else who reads this please if you have any advice Im open to it. ~ZiG~

Ok first off Ill explain the situation. My girlfriend and I are both 18 and we just graduated highschool. I know that seems like were young but Ive already been with her for 2 years now and I know that this is the right thing and I know she wants it to, our problem is with her parents. More specificaly her dad. She gets treated like she is 12 a lot of times and he doesnt give her the respect she deserves. To give you an example of how bad things are I am limited to call her once per week and on the weekends. This is an improvement from when she used to not be able to call guys at all which was befor I asked If i could when we got out of high school. To say that she is shelters is an enormous understatement. We can see each other now at least on the weekends and stuff though. She is going to go to college this coming fall simester away from college and I want to be able to get her an engagement ring some time around Christmas or maybe in Feb, when I get my tax return back. Which reminds me when I buy her ring am I supposed to buy a matching one for me or is she supposed to or is it even nessery for me to have one? I figured we would stay engaged for 2 or 4 years when I can get money to pay for the wedding or we get out of college. I still dont know what to do about her dad. I mean Ive tried to be as patient with it and respectful as I can and all but Im starting to run out of patients and I dont know what to do so i figured I would try to get advice from others with experiance. Please someone help me because I am out of ideas. ~ZiG~