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About Me

  1. 2019 wasn't the best of my life, alone and at peace today, doing my own stuff for quite some months. This is a 6 months update on how am coping with anxiety, getting things right with my life. A relationship which i felt was going to be best for me & her turned out to be a very bad mistake. It was a never to be a relationship in the end, something i really shouldn't have put myself into without verifying facts and knowing well the person am getting involved with. Boundaries were crossed, i lost respect for myself in the end. While getting through it i started developing lot of se
  2. After days of not speaking to one another the silence is broken as the phone begins to ring. With each ring your heart starts to beat faster. You can feel the nerves in your stomach begin to tighten as the mind begins to slowly panic. “It’s her”, you silently tell yourself. After taking a deep breath, you slowly and cautiously answer the phone. “Hello….hey….I don’t want to fight anymore. I love you and –“ you begin but are cut off with the words you hoped and even prayed you would never hear. “So you are giving up on us? After three years you just want to give up? What about us? What about all
  3. It's been about 3 months since we have been broken up. I have gotten a lot strong mentally and emotionally. Although, I do have some days when I miss her. She was such an outstanding person. Before we broke up, she started to be distant with me. When we would spend time together, she would be on her phone half the time. There was a lot that went on that made me feel uncomfortable. One day, she told me she felt overwhelmed with our relationship and she needed space. She continued to say, if I can't respect her space, she would understand if I ended our relationship. I told her I'd res
  4. We are always mentioning red flags and what to look out for when it comes to recognizing toxic behaviors or sketchy behaviors that might spell trouble down the road. But we rarely mention green flags. Behaviors that are positive, and what we should try to look for in a potential partner. Here are a few: 1.) Freely showing affection 2.) Taking a genuine interest in your interests. 3.) Offering and wanting sincere friendship along with romance. 4.) Positive support in all areas of your life. 5.) Willingness to share equally in the finances and is not stingy or greedy
  5. Hi ... I’ve never done this and I recently came across this forum — I feel lately like I’ve lost myself in my relationship, in a way. Social media and my partners bad decisions have impacted me so negatively that my good views on myself have almost completely diminished. We’re trying to make it work, talking about couples therapy, taking a break from one another soon for up to a week - no contact.. it’s a start I guess We’ve only been together for just over a year. He’s 28(m) & I’m 20(f) so there’s a bit of an age gap. We decided to move in together after having known each other
  6. I cant stop obssesing about my partner staying in touch with an old lover. He has been secretive about it and I've snooped his phone. He knows. I feel bad about it too but proves my fears. I wake up anxious at night. Is our relationship ruined? We have been seeing eachother for more than 2 years, we had a miscarriage right at the beginning of the relationship, the pregnancy was unplanned.. ive gotten over it and we have understood we shouldn't put ourselves in that scenario if things are so shaky. He's fantasized about having 2 partners and even though I thought i could deal with at the beginn
  7. Hey! You guys have all been legends with past advice so am hoping for a little more. You will notice from my most recent post I was questioning why my GF wanted to go slower plus her meeting up with an ex. After we had a good chat she saw how it all looked to me and called off meeting up as she didn't want to cause any upset or difficulty. As it stands she still wants us to take things slow. I'm totally respectful of that and don't want to pressure her. At the start of our relationship things were a little quick, she stayed over on our first date, I stayed at hers a week or two la
  8. I know I shouldn't but I did. I decided to send my ex one last text just because I cannot understand why he has been so selfish and cowardly to end our relationship by text and be so cold about it after 4 years and how much I've done for him. I was just telling him how upset I am, I feel depressed and been crying every day and that I looked back at my Facebook and saw how much we did together and what fun we had. I was hoping for a reply along the lines of I know you're upset and I am sorry that i hurt you in how i ended it and i was wrong and am sorry for how you're feeling. Just something to
  9. I honestly don't know where to begin. I guess I should start by giving some background info on my relationship with my boyfriend. I have been dating him since I was 16 and am now 25. We were planning on getting married in a year but am having second thoughts and believe now that I don't want to go through with it. I would say that I have always kind of known that we were not always the most compatible but I always figured if we could respect each other's differences that we could move pass them. One of the biggest being our spiritual beliefs (he is an atheist and I am a Catholic). We also have
  10. So I have started a relationship with a guy who I consider my best friend. We have known each other for a long time, been through a lot, he knows me better than most people and vice versa. I made another thread about how I didn't want a relationship with him, and one of the main things was because of this situation where he doesn't want to work. I ended falling for him and I do love him, he's a beautiful soul and we get along really well. He makes me feel safe, I adore being around him, but I can't take him seriously. I'm 25 years old, I'm not a kid anymore, I want to move in together, get mar
  11. My partner and I have been dating for nearly a year now, he had only been single for six months after getting out of a seven year relationship. From what he has told me it didn’t end very well and bad things were said from both parties. As the New Year has passed he has texted his ex to apologise for what was said during the break up, I respect the kind hearted side of him that felt like he needed to apologise but at the same time it just made me feel like it was opening the door to possibilities of them trying to fix things. Ever since we have got together I have always felt second best to
  12. Hello, I'm in a pretty tough situation and want to gain some insight in how a person on the other end of this situation feels and thinks. I'll try to keep it short but complete. My (22,m) girlfriend (22) and I had been together for a year when she left to study abroad in Italy. Three months in, I planned to go visit her. Two weeks before I left, I discovered she cheated on me. I was angry, sad, frustrated and confused because our relationship was incredibly strong before she left, and she had a big anti-cheater mentality. We talked a lot after I knew and I knew I still loved her. She may ha
  13. Hello all. I'm 27, she's 46, the age was never a problem for me, I've dated older ladies before with no issues, she doesn't seem to have any issues with it. Little back story, I consider myself a very friendly guy, I usually go the extra step to show respect and make everyone happy, hate the thought of going over the line and being disrespectful. I haven't been in any sorta relationship for 3 years, just working and keeping busy. I always keep to myself, not shy, just prefer to be there only when wanted (which is a huge problem). Her and her daughter (10, home schooled) moved here from o
  14. Hei everyone! I'll provide more context as soon as I have more time, but in general do you think that inviting someone to your place on the 4th/5th date, providing that you don't want to get physical yet, can be too soon and a mistake? Should I express to that person before they come that I don't want to get physical yet in case he has that expectation? Or should I express it at the date itself if it comes to that? Should inviting someone home in the early stages of dating be avoided if we don't want to get physical yet? For financial and practical reasons the date will be at my place bu
  15. I met a guy about 9 months ago online. He came off from the start as different in that he wasn't trying to be slick... just a regular guy. We texted, had a few calls, and then went out after a few weeks. It was a nice dinner date. We talked a lot and kissed a little afterwards. He's not a big talker but said he talked more with me than he normally did. He asked to go out again before the end of the night. He was not a heavy texter but remained consistent. After the first date he had an unexpected surgery. We didn't go out again for almost 6 weeks, but again, we kept regular contact. I coul
  16. I was seeing a guy for almost a month. Things were going very nicely. When we first met, we were very open with each other about how we both struggle with mental illness. I suffer with a slight mood disorder, and he suffers with depression. This honesty brought us closer together. As the month went on, he started experiencing hardships. He has to take the semester off of college due to money reasons. His car hydroplaned and hit a wall. He does not have the money right now to fix the damage. He doesn’t have a good family life at home. As these things happened, he seemed very distant and cold to
  17. So I’ve been dating this guy for almost a year. When we just started taking I learn about his social anxiety which I didn’t have a problem with. Three to four months into the relationship I met all his family and we basically moved in with each other. My family will invite him over and he’ll always have an excuse to why he can’t make it. At this point I know I told him I wouldn’t put it and he can do it whenever he’s ready, but that’s now like our main issue. We fight a lot about it because my family is important to me and I feel like I’m not getting the respect I’m giving him..... what should
  18. I had someone contact me via an online dating app. We actually matched online before, but I deleted the app before we really got to know each other and I wasn’t sure about him. This time he sent me a nice message, we matched, he was eager to meet, and we set up a meet for last Saturday. We had been communicating for about 1.5 weeks now. I had family matters surface Saturday morning, so I asked if we could reschedule for this upcoming weekend and he said he was okay with rescheduling. Prior to heading off to bed, he confirms that we have rescheduled for “next week”. Then yesterday he s
  19. I'm really questioning whether or not to continue this friendship. He's been like my best friend for 25 years. We used to hang out every day. Things started getting different after we bought a house together (his idea). After only living together for 2 years, he suddenly tells me he is going to buy a house with another friend, this guy that he only knew for a few months. So it's been about 10 years since that guy came into his life, and we have still hung out, just not as much. I have noticed over the years that my friend doesn't seem to care what is happening in my life, he NEVER asks how
  20. I just need some advice on whether I’m overreacting or not. My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year. We have plans to go to a concert tomorrow night (I bought us tickets). I have to work and will have to rush home so we can make it on time. We have planned all along to go together. His mom decided last minute that she was coming to town. We literally just got back from visiting her in his home town for four days. He plans on hanging out with her and meeting me at the concert. He told me he will probably be late and told me to go in alone or meet with friends until he shows up. I pl
  21. Hello I'm 44, still live at home, no kids and would have thought by now I'd been married, kids etc and living in a nice house and had a comfortable lifestyle. Previous relationships just didn't work out - I was with a fella for 7 years and he left me and haven't been in anything really serious since. Been on dates but nothing developed. Then I met a man 3 years ago and he's 56 and yes I do worry abit about the age gap and the spark has faded but friends tell me oh that's normal. He treats me with so much love & care, respects me and is very faithful and honest. I have finished it
  22. So basicly she broke off with me two months ago because of indifference. We both shared different values, we could not connect great and we did not match. Those were her words tho. I declined that POV but it did not matter so it was over. Point is as follow. I felt like sh*t for a long time and still can't seem to behave normal. I feel this energy flowing constantly. I somehow still can't believe it's over and we never spoke since our last break-up talk. To be honest, i was madly in love with that girl and we had so many good times together. We had so many laughs, so many trips, we went
  23. I've suffered with anxiety and depression for a few years now and one of the main issues for me is trust. I’m in counselling trying to get it under control. I have been with my partner for three years and we’ve lived together for one year, the Trust seems to have got a lot better but last night and today I found myself checking his phone. I went straight to a conversation with his best friend who I have always had problems with. He’s a typical single lad who has little respect for women. Anyway, his friend has on at least two occasions sent my boyfriend photos of half naked girls who he is ‘se
  24. I have been with my company for over 7 years and have developed a healthy respect and rapport with my colleagues and internal partners, being a reliable expert in my area's responsibilities. I am not someone with massive ambitions to climb the career ladder, so I have not pursued other roles within the company, having stayed in my position and becoming a semi-senior (still reporting to the same manager, but being treated on a similar level). I have just received a call from an ex-colleague who has targeted me as a candidate for a new role in their company. He has described it attrac
  25. This isn't the first time he's called me a dumb ass or a name in general when he's been mad. We're getting married next month (we've been together since 2015 and he proposed exactly a year later from our first date) and the invitations aren't going as smoothly as they should due to a lot of miscommunication between myself and both his and my family. Tonight he called his mom just to talk (her and I are really close) like he does every night and she asked about the invitations. After a couple of minutes, he got frustrated and started talking about me like I wasn't in the room but didn't
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