Jump to content

fnlyfrei

Banned Users
  • Posts

    1,618
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by fnlyfrei

  1. My boyfriend...nearly my fiance'...has an ex girlfriend that he states is now his friend...and he believes that he should be able to go share the outdoor hobbies they enjoy...as well as dinner occasionally..without me being worried. Firstly, I have never met whatshername...and I do not know who left who or who ended the relationship really. And if I need to be secure and non-jealous...I should be given the same rights too...I should be able to go out to dinner and coffee with former men I have dated as friends. Somehow I do not think he will consider it the same for me. How do I approach this without starting (another) heated debate? I have talked to his mother about this...she says he is waaaay too insecure to handle me doing what he wants to do....but I figure if I am to trust him, he needs to do the same. I just don't feel comfortable with him nor I hanging about with people we have formerly slept with.
  2. Yes, I meant that she calls him a creep and a liar..I did not mean he was one. I just meant that a woman who turns on him after claiming open dating was cool is actually the dishonest one. She is hoping he will change his mind for her because she is so "awesome". I know I have felt poopy like that...so I stopped dating unless it WAS exclusive. I know for me I cannot handle it. I have stated that upfront to anyone I have been interested in. If he wants to not date me then, it is his choice.
  3. I like nice, strong, well proportioned hands. A man with girl -hands turns me off. I like flat stomachs too...and broad shoulders....and THIGHS...a man with muscular well shaped thighs...now I am missing my boyfriend...I gotta go....
  4. Yeah Syrix....sometimes I think that we american women go against our instincts and better judgement... we try to be like some men and pretend that being sexually intimate doesn't matter to us...when really, deep inside we do not really usually sleep with anyone unless we are hoping for more. I have had first hand experience with women who CLAIM they don't care...they are like "I am so totally COOL with him doing whatever he wants!" But then when (she) found out he had dated me at the same time...she sent a scorching email about him and what a creep he was...so much for not caring! I think females act that way thinking a man will think they are so secure that he will drop everyone else and just date her. When she finds out that isnt the case..he is a liar and a creep. And I am talking about men we REALLY are attracted to...not ones we really do not. Case in point for both sexes...if dating and sleeping with whomever you wish is so cool...why have I seen posts stating that "We are not exclusive, but I do not wish to know about anyone else the person is dating simultaneously." Why not? If you are so dang secure why not tell each other about everything you do? Or is that, perhaps going against basic human nature and the quest for a life mate? A certain amount of jealousy is there for a reason...and I am sure it has to do with basic primordial instincts and mating and the gene pool...as well as some social familial aspects. Unless you are a swinger or really have no attachments emotionally..I do not think it is possible to be completely secure and not give a rip. I just think women and men PRETEND so. It's a load of hooey.
  5. I have a question...I probably know the answer. But, heck...I would be interested in others opinians. Mr Creep and I broke up a year and a half ago...I left for a long list of reasons...including he was tearing down my self-worth and psychologically abusing me...( a master at messing with peoples heads) I would classify him as a sociopath with a narcissistic type mental thing going on. I will not detail all of it...too long to explain and I don't think we have any psychiatrists here. After I left him, I was homeless...destitute and had to move in with a girlfriend with my kids and pets...I found an apartment etc...and he kept trying off and on to involve me in his life...I have told him to leave me alone, I have told him I pretty much detested him in every way...I never minced words and at times I have used some pretty strong ones. He seems to like it. We can go for months with no contact and then he calls out of the blue...and says, "I know you are mad at me, but I have been thinking about you." I guess it used to affect me, but no longer does. Our last conversation before today, I had told him to LEAVE ME ALONE. I guess he thinks he is a pretty irresistible dude, because he KEEPS CALLING ME ! He makes me sick, I have moved on and found someone I completely love...and even when I have told Creep boy this...he acts like I did not say anything. My question is...should I totally not even tell him how much I detest him and to leave me alone...(because it seems to turn him on) Or should I pretend he is dead and when he calls just hang up (he has my internal number at work still from when we were together...so I never know when he will call.) I am very sure he has some very real mental problems. Any suggestions? Rejection and no contact seem to be a challenge for him and make me more appealing....(cause he is nuts) Any other strategies?
  6. Ssoo..if he would have just said...oops, I was sending a message to someone else...sorry ! Instead of claiming it was his supposed sister...you would have been perfectly alright with that?
  7. My two centavos here... Anyone that knows you are married..even if it isn't a perfectly happy marriage...who persues you. Is a creep. (Male or female) And guess what...if you decided to marry them...you would never feel safe or secure with them..after all...marriage means nada to them. I won't even go into why in this great big overpopulated world why ANYONE would choose someone married..regardless of how unique and awesome they claim you are....when there are hoards of other potential mates around...there's something inherently wrong with them.
  8. Yeah...tha non-exclusivity mixed with sleeping together never sat right with me...I get too attached emotionally. I once dated someone and slept over...in the morning before he awoke someone was pounding on his door and I heard a female voice yell some expletives beginning with eff and ending with YOU!!!...I felt so weird. It's one thing to kinda know that you arent the only one...it's another to be sure you aren't. I decided to only date one person at a time after that. I personally can't deal. Everyone is different though.
  9. I have always been attracted to brunette men...dark hair...yet my ex was very blonde and now my SO is a blondie as well....I guess it matters more about the individual than ones pre-concieved notions of what they think they like. My oldest son has only dated asian or hispanic girls though...not one blonde caucasion girl. I guess he is very preferential. It will be interesting to see who my sons marry, and what kind of melting pot our family will be.
  10. Wow...how did your parents know? Did it leave a mark or did you tell them?
  11. DEAR Puff.... I am SO TIRED of you being down on yourself !!! You are only 21....you are obviously very social, well read, and attractive. The TRICK to all of this dating stuff is to like YOURSELF. Others can sense it like dogs can smell fear...work on YOU and get all full of yourself and cocky...that's the ticket !
  12. Yeah, refer to "He's just not that into you"...and move on. You deserve to find someone cute AND crazy about you!!!!
  13. I guess the free part...is good. link removed did not seem to give me any better results than the free site. Some men have really good profiles...but it doesn't mean they are good themselves...some are very honest...others totally hide things. (Like the fact that they live with their mothers still, do not have a job or aren't QUITE divorced yet. Some men use the sites to date as many women as possible with no intention of anything serious ever. It's a game. For them it is like a BIG candy store. (Yeah, I met one of those...jerk!) I guess the mistake I made was to see someone for who they were and then hope I could change their mind...duh! Just be careful. Go with first impressions...(when you meet) I am all about trusting your instincts. I think I have heard of link removed.....I am not sure if mate 1 crosses the waters...but you could check. Good luck to you...and have fun !
  14. Mate 1. com is free for women...I met my soon-to-be fiance there...just remember...dating sites are like real life...you have to pull alot of weeds !
  15. "I detest 'love lyrics.' I think one of the causes of bad mental health in the United States is that people have been raised on 'love lyrics." - Frank Zappa "I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." - Rita Rudner "Don't threaten me with love, Baby. Let's just go walking in the rain." - Billie Holiday "Marriage is a fine institution - but I'm not ready for an institution." - Mae West
  16. The new James Bond...yeah...wow. (whew!)
  17. Yeah, I guessed that it was just a joke...I just meant that you shouldn't feel so hopeless !!! Besides, ever watched "The Thornbirds"? Priests can be pretty hot...
  18. Dating stinks. For both sides I think. The search for a special someone is very needle in the hastackish... I have gone out on first dates where I knew the other person just wasn't my type. I have gone out on three or four dates with someone before I knew they just did not click with me. The last person I met...is it. I just knew he was. It's weird. Joining the preisthood is a bit extreme. You just haven't met "THE ONE" yet. So why worry about the ones that were probably rejects anyway? It seems like if you stop caring so much about it...it happens..."What you resist persists."...Act like you don't give a flip...and what you want...or whom you want...will be there faster than you know !
  19. I online dated for a year or so...I did not like anyone asking for "phone" right away either...it's kind of creepy until you have had several conversations. I actually preferred IM at first. Then before a face to face, yes, a phone conversation. I met the man I am probably going to marry there this past September. I hope you are as lucky as I was. You meet alot of people who arent right..but eventually...it will happen !
  20. Hmm, a tip? are you really that good?? Yeah...I am, what of it?
  21. These prostitution analogies are really irritating me. I guess all females are some form of a prostitute then...if I am, I suppose I want CASH...not stupid dinners or movies !!! And heck, I want a tip for really good service !
  22. Eww...get a new bed. Try to erase it from your memory. What happened before you met one another is history. I would ask him not to share his stories.
  23. Stick with what you believe. If you change your mind, so be it ! It sure would filter out the jerks who just want to use you. I applaud you for thinking out of the box and perhaps evoking some thought in other people....
  24. Hmmm, board games, myspace, cards, plan out your dream home, make up a business plan for a company you might want to run. Bake cookies, do each others nails..backrubs. Color each others hair. Make breakfast burritos and sell them at school...dream, think...plan ! ( Ahh you are so young and full of potential !)
×
×
  • Create New...