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About Me

  1. A few years back, I posted a journal of my online dating experiences: A couple of relationships later, I was finally dumped in November and tried to get her back in March: That didn't work, so I went through some self-examination: Now I'm back in the singles game... so here's Round 2 of an online dating journal from a 42-yo guy in a big American city. I have accounts on POF & Match.com, but the former seems a bit sketchy and the latter has never yielded any results for me. So for now I'll be focusing on OKCupid, which has been pretty effective for me in the past and
  2. Hello, there's this girl that I've been talking to over discord for around 3 years, and I know that its cliché and even a little foolish to be saying this at my age (I'm only 16), but I honestly think that she's the one for me. Before I get into the actual story, I should say that I have autism and that the girl (I'll be referring to her as "the Woman" from now on) suffers from PTSD, ADHD, and hypersexuality (it might not be too important, but I'm mentioning it just in case). Anyways, exactly 2 weeks ago, the Woman and I were talking in dms just like every other night, and In summar
  3. Hi all I had figured my codependency thread was becoming a bit more like a journal. More information can be found in my first thread where a number of issues began. https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=548598 The past three years since my Dad passed away have been hard, not helped by the codependency of the relationship I went through shortly at the end of 2017 (see above). Dwelling on her for so long has not been healthy, and it's only thanks to this site and my counsellor that I think I can say, I'm finally moving on. After putting four stone on last year, I'm now finally
  4. Hello guys, this is my first post ever but I just don’t know what to do. Maybe someone here can help me. I’m in my early 20s and my life has been a little messy the past years so this will be long (sorry!) My ex broke up with me almost two years ago. The relationship was very toxic and after the breakup I hit rock bottom. Until this day I’m still struggling with my mental health because the event triggered a lot of other issues too. My ex didn’t tell me why he left but he is still reaching out to me and sending me flowers. Which to me is insane and stupid. but my real prob
  5. Okay soooo, I have known my current boyfriend for over 10 years. We have been the best of friends since we were 13. We have only been dating though for the last 9 months or so. But before that, he always had girlfriends as long as I have known him. He was in a serious relationship for 6 years. Dating a lot of girls before and after her, slept around a little etc. he has NEVER given off a single gay tendency to me, never seemed attracted to men, never showed a single sign. We got into a relationship last summer and moved in together. I went through his phone one night and there was a gay dating
  6. I thought I would give a go at this journaling thing. My friends do not partake in online dating and I don't really get feedback from anyone that does. Mostly my friends shake their heads and ask `why?' I've been out of a relationship since May '14 and without rehashing all that has transpired I will say that online dating has changed considerably in the past 3 years. I've taken several breaks, mostly after meeting men looking for casual sex and men who are too afraid to put themselves out there and seem to put me in the drivers seat to pursue them and breath life into the situation.
  7. Hi Folks, I thought I'd write up some tips on how to cope with finding out your ex-partner cheated on you and then left you for that person. My 2 year relationship with my ex-boyfriend ended last April. He emotionally cheated on me with a married woman and then left me for her. To my knowledge they are currently in a committed relationship but keeping it a secret. This forum has been supportive to me and is filled with amazing people who give spectacular advice, but I thought it would be fun to write a post to address almost everything that I wish I knew 3 months ago but didn't know at the
  8. I reentered online dating last fall and it's going nowhere. I first tried it five years ago, at age 25. Back then I averaged one date per month, so what gives? Does entering your 30s suddenly damage your appeal that much? I look the same, am trying to date women in my age group, and quite honestly am a much more mature person than I was at 25. I'm more confident with who I am, yet I can't muster a single date. Despite living in a university town and being an artist and musician, I have no real social life. I almost considered going back to college last fall but backed out. Now I'm tempted
  9. After a few weeks into the dreaded online dating world I actually had a date who didn’t ghost day of, which was refreshing. Also, I think she looked better in person so I was pleasantly surprised. We met up and had a couple drinks and talked and laughed and did karaoke for almost 6 hours. Time really flew by and we seemed to get along really well. I walked her to her car at the end of the night and we hugged and I went for the kiss, maybe shouldn’t have. She give a really quick peck but felt like it was mostly me. Got in her car and left but seemed to be smiling and happy. Must’ve read t
  10. Hello all, To be honest, this post may not give me the answers I need but everyone here has always been so helpful. As some may remember I have been in a relationship that I felt wasn't really fulfilling its potential. I wanted things to speed.up a little, she wanted things to stay slow. Well over the past few months , it started to pick up again. We saw more of each other, spoke more often on the phone and all was going ok. However in the past few weeks she started to go quiet again then yesterday she ended it with me. In a way, I'm cool with it as it means I no longer have to be
  11. Hi all, I was wondering if someone out there could help me out with this. I’m sure it’s all in my head but would appreciate others thoughts. I’ve known my girlfriend as a friend for over a decade. We met randomly in a bar and hit it off straight away. Within the last year we got closer and romantically involved. Everything was amazing at first. Texting all the time, texting into the early hours, all that mushy good stuff in a new relationship. I knew it wouldn’t last forever. So when it tailed off and she became a bit less chatty and would leave long gaps between replies, I wasn’t s
  12. I've been officially single over a week but in reality after not seeing my ex since September Ive been emotionally single a lot longer. To summarise breaking up came about due to covid restrictions, growing apart during the lockdowns and just not being the right fit for me. We started dating around this time last year but haven't spent tons of time together due to covid. She is heartbroken and I'm upset about that part of her being upset but personally I feel fine about breaking up, I know I made the right choice and I'm on the right path for me and excited about the new chapter in my lif
  13. Has anyone here got any real relationships from online dating or knows people that have? I've been giving online dating more of a chance and putting more effort in this year because I'm 35 years old and want kids and marriage. I'm using a few dating sites and even a couple of paid ones. I do get quite a few messages and get dates but I'm just feeling like online dating isn't the best to actually find a serious relationship. I guess I don't actually have good experience of online dating myself. I've been using OLD for about 17 years (since I was 18) on and off and I've never actually had a
  14. Good morning all, Have any of you dealt with an insecure or generally mistrustful SO? BF and I have been together 8 months and a couple things have happened that he says made him mistrust me. He had an abusive and rough childhood and his last girlfriend cheated, so he’s admitted he has trouble trusting people. I understand as I have my own insecurities, but am actively working through them. - While looking up something on my phone last month, he somehow pulled up a POF deletion site and thought I was still using dating apps. I deleted all my dating apps when we became boyfriend
  15. I don't understand. I am hurt, yes. Why do they do that? I don't understand men. I went and got involved emotionally. I have crushed on a man for awhile. It is a coworker. I know I sound like I'm 17. I'm not talking about overt flirting or anything. When we were in the office, I did catch a vibe, but I also got mixed signals...there seemed to be attraction, then not...I think all of us can relate to that. Things advanced. We started texting outside work. It turns out this "vibe" was accurate. I was pretty excited and happy about it. Yes, I know, work relationships are
  16. Hi everyone, I thought maybe I could get some clarity and spark some discussions. Ok firstly my view on social media - when I was young everything was up on Facebook and twitter, I then dated a VERY insecure man who made me delete all social media and for about 3 years I got into the habit of never using it. Never felt the urge, even when we broke up it took me 2 years after to remake social media accounts - I felt at a loss on what to actually post. Luckily I worked in a high corporate job where posting anything other than charity/ events or sports related pictures was very 'frowned
  17. I met this guy about 2 months ago on an online dating site. We finally met in person and he was the sweetest guy I have ever met. He told me he was single for 2 years so and he was looking for a long term relationship. Everything was great between us, we even things planned to do when lockdown is over. I have have a sleepover already and he told me how much he loves me how crazy he was about me. And showed me through his actions too. No red flags yet, we talked yesterday in morning and everything was ok. Didn't hear from him during the I thought he was busy. So I wished him good night and went
  18. I met this guy about 2 months ago on an online dating site. We finally met in person and he was the sweetest guy I have ever met. He told me he was single for 2 years so and he was looking for a long term relationship. Everything was great between us, we even things planned to do when lockdown is over. I have have a sleepover already and he told me how much he loves me how crazy he was about me. And showed me through his actions too. No red flags yet, we talked yesterday in morning and everything was ok. Didn't hear from him during the I thought he was busy. So I wished him good night and went
  19. I have met a guy on a dating app and I felt that we really connected after our first date. I really liked him and I think he liked me. The next day I met him with another woman. it was awkward. We acted like we did not notice each other. I am not sure who she is. It probably just means he is not into me. Any advice? Should i just forget him and move on - I do not want to do it though. Should I act as nothing happened?
  20. I'm feeling a bit unsure about this so thought I would see what people think. I'm 35 and I met a guy who is 38 on an online dating app. Not a hookup app or anything, just a normal one. We were messaging back and forth for a while on the app and then I suggested a video call due to strict COVID restrictions in my state. We had a three hour video call and the conversation seemed to be going well. At the end of the video chat he said that he thought it went really well and he's hoping we can chat more and hopefully also go on a real date. I was interested in him because I was attracted to
  21. Before I start, please can people not comment saying "you need therapy" or "you need to look at yourself". I am receiving extensive therapy and treatment for why I let these people in and I know why I do it, because my father is a narcissist and therefore I seek out emotionally unstable partners. I am working on things. And i am trying, I wanted to share my story so others can recognise the signs and maybe feel like if they wanted to share theirs it might help them. This relationship went on for almost 2 years. Hi, I don’t know who is reading this but I needed to write this out becaus
  22. Ok guys as time goes by it just seems like my life just keeps going downhill. I always reminisce of how much better my life was in my early 20's. I feel like I haven't developed at all throughout these years. Heres some cliffs -still live with parents and siblings at home (I pay 600 a month just to help my mom out with mortgage) -have 20k debt and all in collections (I just paid one company off and about 6 more to go) -no education (dropped out of nursing school in my early 20's and got a full-time job) I got promoted from my company once I got my license to drive a commercial tru
  23. Hi everyone, Thanks in advance for reading my post. So, a couple years back, I met a guy on an online dating site and we hit it off, dated a few times, had sex and it kind of died out. I didn't care at that moment because I met him when I was completing my internship out of state and was planning on returning back home within the following month of meeting him. First date- he flat out said he was focused on his business and not looking for marriage, etc. When he found out I moved back home, he began contacting me again (2 weeks from our last date). We chatted every now and then. I traveled
  24. Good day everyone. Ok to start of, after being single for 7 months i've been focusing all my time and energy into building my business, which right now is somewhat thriving, which is more than i can say about it really, as well as physical fitness and just perusing self improvement, i've learned a new language a new instrument etc... recently i've started dating again, however i am not having any luck. whats weird is before i had money and a relatively good body i could really date like 3-4 girls in a week, not gonna hide it or not gonna say im proud if it, but when i was a lot younger a
  25. As the title states, I’m almost 40 and have never been in a really LTR. The longest was a yr and a half and that was in my mid 20s. The relationships (or whatever you want to call them) I do get in tend to end in heartbreak. Last longish one was with someone who I believe suffered from narcissistic personality disorder and when it ended, I was physically and emotionally drained. I’m decent looking, independent, own my own home and have a pretty good sense of humor. What brings me here is I’ve done the online dating thing for about 10 yrs now. I always seem to get the first few dates but nothin
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