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About Me

  1. Okay soooo, I have known my current boyfriend for over 10 years. We have been the best of friends since we were 13. We have only been dating though for the last 9 months or so. But before that, he always had girlfriends as long as I have known him. He was in a serious relationship for 6 years. Dating a lot of girls before and after her, slept around a little etc. he has NEVER given off a single gay tendency to me, never seemed attracted to men, never showed a single sign. We got into a relationship last summer and moved in together. I went through his phone one night and there was a gay dating
  2. I thought I would give a go at this journaling thing. My friends do not partake in online dating and I don't really get feedback from anyone that does. Mostly my friends shake their heads and ask `why?' I've been out of a relationship since May '14 and without rehashing all that has transpired I will say that online dating has changed considerably in the past 3 years. I've taken several breaks, mostly after meeting men looking for casual sex and men who are too afraid to put themselves out there and seem to put me in the drivers seat to pursue them and breath life into the situation.
  3. Hi Folks, I thought I'd write up some tips on how to cope with finding out your ex-partner cheated on you and then left you for that person. My 2 year relationship with my ex-boyfriend ended last April. He emotionally cheated on me with a married woman and then left me for her. To my knowledge they are currently in a committed relationship but keeping it a secret. This forum has been supportive to me and is filled with amazing people who give spectacular advice, but I thought it would be fun to write a post to address almost everything that I wish I knew 3 months ago but didn't know at the
  4. A few years back, I posted a journal of my online dating experiences: A couple of relationships later, I was finally dumped in November and tried to get her back in March: That didn't work, so I went through some self-examination: Now I'm back in the singles game... so here's Round 2 of an online dating journal from a 42-yo guy in a big American city. I have accounts on POF & Match.com, but the former seems a bit sketchy and the latter has never yielded any results for me. So for now I'll be focusing on OKCupid, which has been pretty effective for me in the past and
  5. Hi all I had figured my codependency thread was becoming a bit more like a journal. More information can be found in my first thread where a number of issues began. https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=548598 The past three years since my Dad passed away have been hard, not helped by the codependency of the relationship I went through shortly at the end of 2017 (see above). Dwelling on her for so long has not been healthy, and it's only thanks to this site and my counsellor that I think I can say, I'm finally moving on. After putting four stone on last year, I'm now finally
  6. I reentered online dating last fall and it's going nowhere. I first tried it five years ago, at age 25. Back then I averaged one date per month, so what gives? Does entering your 30s suddenly damage your appeal that much? I look the same, am trying to date women in my age group, and quite honestly am a much more mature person than I was at 25. I'm more confident with who I am, yet I can't muster a single date. Despite living in a university town and being an artist and musician, I have no real social life. I almost considered going back to college last fall but backed out. Now I'm tempted
  7. After a few weeks into the dreaded online dating world I actually had a date who didn’t ghost day of, which was refreshing. Also, I think she looked better in person so I was pleasantly surprised. We met up and had a couple drinks and talked and laughed and did karaoke for almost 6 hours. Time really flew by and we seemed to get along really well. I walked her to her car at the end of the night and we hugged and I went for the kiss, maybe shouldn’t have. She give a really quick peck but felt like it was mostly me. Got in her car and left but seemed to be smiling and happy. Must’ve read t
  8. Hello all, To be honest, this post may not give me the answers I need but everyone here has always been so helpful. As some may remember I have been in a relationship that I felt wasn't really fulfilling its potential. I wanted things to speed.up a little, she wanted things to stay slow. Well over the past few months , it started to pick up again. We saw more of each other, spoke more often on the phone and all was going ok. However in the past few weeks she started to go quiet again then yesterday she ended it with me. In a way, I'm cool with it as it means I no longer have to be
  9. Hi all, I was wondering if someone out there could help me out with this. I’m sure it’s all in my head but would appreciate others thoughts. I’ve known my girlfriend as a friend for over a decade. We met randomly in a bar and hit it off straight away. Within the last year we got closer and romantically involved. Everything was amazing at first. Texting all the time, texting into the early hours, all that mushy good stuff in a new relationship. I knew it wouldn’t last forever. So when it tailed off and she became a bit less chatty and would leave long gaps between replies, I wasn’t s
  10. I've been officially single over a week but in reality after not seeing my ex since September Ive been emotionally single a lot longer. To summarise breaking up came about due to covid restrictions, growing apart during the lockdowns and just not being the right fit for me. We started dating around this time last year but haven't spent tons of time together due to covid. She is heartbroken and I'm upset about that part of her being upset but personally I feel fine about breaking up, I know I made the right choice and I'm on the right path for me and excited about the new chapter in my lif
  11. Has anyone here got any real relationships from online dating or knows people that have? I've been giving online dating more of a chance and putting more effort in this year because I'm 35 years old and want kids and marriage. I'm using a few dating sites and even a couple of paid ones. I do get quite a few messages and get dates but I'm just feeling like online dating isn't the best to actually find a serious relationship. I guess I don't actually have good experience of online dating myself. I've been using OLD for about 17 years (since I was 18) on and off and I've never actually had a
  12. Good morning all, Have any of you dealt with an insecure or generally mistrustful SO? BF and I have been together 8 months and a couple things have happened that he says made him mistrust me. He had an abusive and rough childhood and his last girlfriend cheated, so he’s admitted he has trouble trusting people. I understand as I have my own insecurities, but am actively working through them. - While looking up something on my phone last month, he somehow pulled up a POF deletion site and thought I was still using dating apps. I deleted all my dating apps when we became boyfriend
  13. I don't understand. I am hurt, yes. Why do they do that? I don't understand men. I went and got involved emotionally. I have crushed on a man for awhile. It is a coworker. I know I sound like I'm 17. I'm not talking about overt flirting or anything. When we were in the office, I did catch a vibe, but I also got mixed signals...there seemed to be attraction, then not...I think all of us can relate to that. Things advanced. We started texting outside work. It turns out this "vibe" was accurate. I was pretty excited and happy about it. Yes, I know, work relationships are
  14. Hi everyone, I thought maybe I could get some clarity and spark some discussions. Ok firstly my view on social media - when I was young everything was up on Facebook and twitter, I then dated a VERY insecure man who made me delete all social media and for about 3 years I got into the habit of never using it. Never felt the urge, even when we broke up it took me 2 years after to remake social media accounts - I felt at a loss on what to actually post. Luckily I worked in a high corporate job where posting anything other than charity/ events or sports related pictures was very 'frowned
  15. I met this guy about 2 months ago on an online dating site. We finally met in person and he was the sweetest guy I have ever met. He told me he was single for 2 years so and he was looking for a long term relationship. Everything was great between us, we even things planned to do when lockdown is over. I have have a sleepover already and he told me how much he loves me how crazy he was about me. And showed me through his actions too. No red flags yet, we talked yesterday in morning and everything was ok. Didn't hear from him during the I thought he was busy. So I wished him good night and went
  16. I met this guy about 2 months ago on an online dating site. We finally met in person and he was the sweetest guy I have ever met. He told me he was single for 2 years so and he was looking for a long term relationship. Everything was great between us, we even things planned to do when lockdown is over. I have have a sleepover already and he told me how much he loves me how crazy he was about me. And showed me through his actions too. No red flags yet, we talked yesterday in morning and everything was ok. Didn't hear from him during the I thought he was busy. So I wished him good night and went
  17. I have met a guy on a dating app and I felt that we really connected after our first date. I really liked him and I think he liked me. The next day I met him with another woman. it was awkward. We acted like we did not notice each other. I am not sure who she is. It probably just means he is not into me. Any advice? Should i just forget him and move on - I do not want to do it though. Should I act as nothing happened?
  18. I'm feeling a bit unsure about this so thought I would see what people think. I'm 35 and I met a guy who is 38 on an online dating app. Not a hookup app or anything, just a normal one. We were messaging back and forth for a while on the app and then I suggested a video call due to strict COVID restrictions in my state. We had a three hour video call and the conversation seemed to be going well. At the end of the video chat he said that he thought it went really well and he's hoping we can chat more and hopefully also go on a real date. I was interested in him because I was attracted to
  19. Before I start, please can people not comment saying "you need therapy" or "you need to look at yourself". I am receiving extensive therapy and treatment for why I let these people in and I know why I do it, because my father is a narcissist and therefore I seek out emotionally unstable partners. I am working on things. And i am trying, I wanted to share my story so others can recognise the signs and maybe feel like if they wanted to share theirs it might help them. This relationship went on for almost 2 years. Hi, I don’t know who is reading this but I needed to write this out becaus
  20. Hey, hope everyone is doing as well as possible during these times. I'd really need some objective, unbiased advice from someone who's preferably more experienced than me when it comes to romance and relationships (so pretty much anyone lol). This might be long though, so bare with me. Basically, I'm a woman in my 20's. I don't have much experience with relationships so I find it hard to trust my judgement in this case. I usually stay away from romantic involvement - I have avoidant tendencies and I'm also really busy with studies and establishing my career. Other than that I'm prett
  21. I started dating a guy (he’s 37, I’m 32) I met online a couple of months ago. We hit it off quickly and even though we were a little long distance (he lives an hour away), decided to give it a go. It went really well. I liked him a lot and we had great chemistry. We saw each other about once a week and then also had a video date each week and texted. We both are single parents so we were understanding when we couldn’t talk or see each other all the time. About a month in, he asked me to be his girlfriend and we became exclusive. I even briefly met his son and mom because his son had asked
  22. Hi all, I've been doing online dating recently, for about the past 2 months and while there has been some fun times I've also had some pretty awful times. I know 2 months isn't a long time but I guess I was originally hoping things would go better than they have and it is getting to me a little bit. So I haven't managed to find someone who's right for me yet. It's really strange because I seem to either find guys who really really like me and I don't feel anything for them or I find guys who I end up liking and they kind of end up disappearing. I guess I'm starting to wonder what is wron
  23. I'm back to online dating after taking a long break. I received a message from someone I think we met years ago on a first date. This guy met me for drinks and never called me after our date. I got the feeling he wasn't into me. It is what it is. I moved on and dated other people. So-fast forward to 2020 and I re-join the same website. A guy messages me. He looks vaguely familiar. In his message he points out that he read my profile in the past and wanted to say hi. He asked about one of my pictures etc. and said if anything interested me in his profile to reach out. I figured it most likely w
  24. I'm a guy in my early forties. I'm pretty shy for someone of my age, and I know very little about women. I want a wife and children, but I haven't had any success meeting anyone who fits my preferences. Worse, I have much less time to search than a decade ago and I'm not as good looking as I was then. She's very smart, not too selfish, a bit introverted, and conservative, in the sense that she also wants family and children. And she's not taken. Where do I look for her? I tried work, I talked to all women there. I tried online dating; it sucks to be a guy there. Maybe I should try ask
  25. When we met online, we hit it off. we met in person and the connection and chemistry was undeniable. He stayed at my flat for 2 weeks.And he asked me to be exclusive but the problem is we live hours apart. But he said we will make it work. When he return to his town, he confessed to me shortly that he slept with his ex. According to him she started reaching out to him a week when he was planning to see me and she knew about me as he told her. When he returned home she asked him to hang out and he accepted with intention of just chatting. one thing led to another they ended up having sex. h
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