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  1. This is a bit of a story, but any advice or input would help me so much. my boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years, and in the beginning me and his sister got along fine. We weren’t super close but got along good. After about 6 months (summer) she wanted to go to the beach and do things with me, and I was super excited cuz all my past relationships have been toxic and I was excited to finally have an in law. I started a new job and wasn’t available as much, and one day she just stopped asking me to hang out. after a couple of months of only seeing her around the property, we ended up going to a local bar with other friends. When we were alone; she told me when my bf and I first met on a dating app, that he was stuck between me and another girl and only Chose me because the other girl changed her mind. Of course I immediately called my boyfriend and as soon as I dialed, her back peddling began. My bf told the truth. He was talking to a girl with that name, a year before we Met, and they only spoke a couple of Times. The situation was let go because she was drunk and denied malicious intent. 6 months later I was spending the night at my boyfriends house, we would have beeN together for a year and a half at this point. I open the drawer ive been using since the beginning of our relationship, to find underwear that doesn’t belong to me. I’m shock, all I said was these aren’t mine and left the room. My boyfriend gets up, and walks out the door. I didn’t know what was going on. When he gets back his mom is with him, and he’s clearly upset/sad/angry, and asks her if he was over to his house (neighbours) and accidentally put them there. She said no but confirmed that they were 100% his sister cuz she saw them in the wash recently. She has no idea how they made it next door, into my drawer. And of course, the sister denies it. ove this past summer I got her a job with me, since the pandemic work has been tough, and even after everything she put me through, when she asked if I could get her an interview I did. After she got the job she repaid me by talking ill of my to my coworkers (one being my cousin) and telling me the bosses were saying I was too slow at the job and I was the worst employee. She only did it to turn my self esteem. iF you’ve made it this far, im So sorry for the length. So much has happened. This last part is the most recent tho. one night she came over and was just hanging out when she asked my bf if she could spend the night on the couch. No big deal. Before anyone could say anything in response she said “if you guys wanna *** it’s okay I don’t mind listening”. as someone with siblings this completely mind blew me and my bf. He just said no. And to go back to their parents. My boyfriend found it weird and says he spoke to her and she just wasn’t thinking before she spoke. he has since kinda just pushed it aside and forgot about it, but it still sits weird with me. When we’re at family meals i sometimes see her licking her fingers and staring at him, idk if it’s supposed to be a childish joke or something a little darker. She has no boundaries. We plan to move in together within the next couple of years. And I’m scared of what’s going to happen. My boyfriend says there will be boundaries and he won’t let me be uncomfortable especially in my own home, but I feel guilty since the family is so close knit and as of now if she wants to come over she can just barge in. And scared of her reaction when those boundaries are put in place and she can’t just invade whenever she wants. thanks for reading. I’m just wondering what other people would do if they were me, or my advice on maybe what her deal is. Cuz my mind as been over ever scenario, and i mean every single one.
  2. No one in this world loves me. I'm not close to my moms family and I live my life alone with no family around me. I got in contact with my estranged father after 20 years of no contact and found out that he has a 10 year old daughter. I made a mistake and looked him up on Facebook and his daughter is extremely beautiful. There are so many pictures of them out and about doing things and I developed this toxic jealousy against her and I feel terrible about it. I'm realizing he will never love me as much as he loves her. She's his little girl. Not me. He doesn't even know me. He attempts to message me almost every day but its normally just small talk. I want this relationship to work out but I struggle with the fact that he is very capable of living life without me. He did it for 20 years. What should I do about this?
  3. Hi So ya, to start with my mom found out that that my dad has an affair with another woman and they always meet. Almost every day actually. To be honest I am torn with respect toward my father and hatred. Now my father wanted to take that woman as a second wife ( my country allows polygamous relationship ). Of course, I hate that woman and to make it worst, she went to my house and bang on the door this morning because my mom won't let my dad take his phone or take a step outside without her this last few days. I mean how shameless can she be. My maternal grandma said that mom should go back to her house if dad decided to take that woman. Jokes on you, I hate that woman so much. You see my father was one of the biggest shareholder in a company and that mean he has this tons of authorities in this company. My mom found out that my dad is trying to take that woman as one of the staff there. So my mom went to see the company CEO and well at that time she could not control her anger. You know what my dad did? She scold my mom. That woman also blame my mother's friend for telling her about their affair. I mean she goes around with my dad calling her honey and stuff. They even met each respective family to get blessings and she goes around telling everyone my dad is her boyfriend and they are waiting for my mother approval. Are my mom a jokes to you? It broke my heart to see my dad acting like nothing ever happen and mom keep on crying. You see my mom is a housewife. She said that she become a housewife when my dad coaxed her to take care of the children. If not for dad, she will have a brighter life. After she married my dad she got an offer in one of the biggest company in my country, but she turned it down because she said that she does not want a long distance relationship, later she fell into depression then she got better, then she got a job somewhere closer and later she quit to become a housewife. I am the eldest out of 5 siblings and I am a first year in college with full parents support. So I could not do anything except for the mental support to mum. I am still living with her. Mom said that she is trying to hold herself and ask me to study and get good job, so she can be at ease. My mom is well she is crying almost every day and she only slept for a few hours last night. I am thinking of getting a job, but I know mom and dad will object. I just cant focus and my younger siblings does not know anything. It pain me seeing them and mom. Well I am venting here since I'll stay anonymous here. My mom only told me, her parents and some of the close friends. I will take any advice on what can I do now. Thank you.,
  4. I have been dating this girl for 2 years now. We have had our ups and downs, with drugs, financially, shes a little unstable when it comes to mental health. Shes been through hell for more than half her life. The problem is she needs help for the drugs. Im pretty strong when it comes to that I dont have a care for them. But she has been told by my whole family that she has to stay away from here. Cant call cant do nothing. She has been working for the past month and has been doing well on that front. But One little relapse turns everything upside down and right side wrong. Im not the strongest in the world when it comes to depression and fighting love that I feel for someone. When she has them episodes im not One who knows to much about keeping her tied down in the closet and keeping her straight. Shes going to do it anyways right? I want this thing to work. We have been looking for a place to rent on our own for a couple of weeks now and we were getting atleast somewhere in our lives finally. Just One little mistake makes everything hell between me and my family. I know being 25 years old I should listen to my own conscionce and do what I feel is right or could help her. Her sister is moving here from SC probably First of next week. I believe her moving here would straighten her out a little bit. Because she has NO family here and that makes her very depressed and wanna go toward the drugs. I love this girl with my life. I have bent over backwards literally for her. I have gave her so much money, so much of my time and ALL of my heart. I am a really decent and honest guy. I dont cheat, I dont run off and leave her alone. But the problem is I dont know how to control her and keep her safe from the drugs because I been clean a year now, and it just scares the livin crap outta me.... I am inbetween jobs at the moment. So you know it makes it a bit harder tryin to find a place. But I have a lead with a past job and it might go through. So thats good news! I know God has his reasons for doing the things he does with our lives, and also who he brings in our lives. Love has always stuck with me for someone else. It really puts a damper on my emotions cause sometimes I cant keep them under controle. When I get like this I seem to lose a ton of weight and not eat for a month. Its hard to excersize or even call anyone to talk. I really dont wanna go through this again. Me and her have been through a lot over the past 2 years and im really ready to settle down and live an honest life that God has planned for me. Her sister I know can keep her in line because she will bail her out and make her know that shes a screw up and everything else. I still have my doubts but I also need to get out on my own also. Could moving 50 more miles away maybe help? She dont have a vehicle at the moment but I will be working to get one. Her sister is coming here with her vehicle so we all will have ways to work and to the store for convenience. But her sister has made it clear to me that she will not screw around. I just dont wanna put a restriction on her because shes 22 years old and its not my job to keep her tied down and locked up. But it is my job as her fiance to keep her safe and let her know that these drugs and wild oats are going to end up killing her or ruining her life for good. I just need some real advice. I know its a long recovery from drugs. I been there and done that. Its a hard recovery to. But I also know there is not ANYONE who can do it on there own. This girl needs me and my parents keeping me restricted from her or anyone else isnt right.
  5. hey everyone well about halfway through last year i wanted 2 live with one of my 3 sisters because i wasnt happy with the area i was living in and i was really depressed. anway so they all gave me false hope and led me to believe it was ok to move with them then changed their mind. i never really opened up to them until i was led to believe i was getting out of here and then i started to. the funny thing is not one of them apologised for doing that. im not hurt at the fact i couldnt go but the fact they led me to believe i could and then burst my bubble. ive tried to tell them how much it hurt but they just said your only 16 and i dont want you 2 be my responsibility. the funny thing is if the situations were reversed id still take them in even after the pain they caused me. so basically i forgave them i dint 4get wat they did and accepted i got 2 more years in this hole. but now its 4th week of school and i get depressed for no reason sometimes but other times i feel fine all i want to know is does anyone know a way i can stop these random depressions. and how can i stop it
  6. My family has just moved...while I invested a lot of time and energy in the move beforehand, afterwards I just didn't have the strength to work on the place. I went back to work, and tried to help out in the evenings. In the past couple of days, my wife just exploded: I'm nasty to her friends, my mother is an evil witch and I take no responsibility for anything. So she says. She's gotten completely hysterical, and even her sisters say she's gone totally irrational. When I asked her why she stays with me (yes - we've gotten that far), she says that she loves me, and that I have certain characteristics that she knows she can't find anywhere else. But she acts in a way that is seriously endangering her chances of enjoying those characteristics for much longer... In any case, I understand what she wants - to know that I am there for her, that I am behind her all the way...but I don't know how to convince her that I am. No matter what I do. it's just not good enough, it's "cosmetic"' I'm just doing it to avoid conflict. So - any ideas how I can convince her I am behind her?
  7. I will try and be as brief as possible. We met about 7 months ago. She is 4 1/2 years younger than me. She has two children in another state who live with their father. She divorced him over a year ago and left to get away from him but misses her children very much. We broke up at the end of April after an incident where I freaked out because I was insecure and it manifested itself when we couldn't get a table anywhere for dinner. She tried to reassure me but I clammed up. We did get together two weeks later, and since, we had been going back and forth between being completely in couple mode to just friends. Regardless, we have been intimate the entire time. However, there have been occasions where it seemed that we couldn't deal with it and would almost separate only to come back together. This whole time, she has been torn between wanting to stay here and be with me, or go back to her children. I am supportive of her being with her children and think we can work it out, she takes an "all-or-nothing" approach. She even told about three weeks ago that she was considering staying here for me. I have even offered to go with her and she actually considered it seriously until she decided it "would only make things more complicated". She is afraid her ex-husband may make it difficult for her to see her kids. We went to Mexico last month and we seemed to get very close. Since we have been back she has been increasingly unavailable. Two weeks ago, we had a terrible falling out, precipitated by alcohol, me being on medication and her seeking independence. We went out and insecurities built up and words were exchanged. The incident, in the end, really is not what concerns me as it was just an excuse for her to do what she did later. Last week, she called me up and I went over. We didn't discuss the previous incident but ended up sleeping together. Then, on Monday, she emailed me and said it was a "HUGE mistake"...and said it would be better if we didn't keep in touch anymore. She finished by saying "Good bye". However, she went out with my sister this past Friday, and told her the following: That she does this when she cares alot about someone (getting distant). She says that she is definitely moving back to xxxx in two weeks. She only had "good things" to say about me, that we had a lot of good times together. She appreciated my email from Friday. Her family here doesn't want her to go. She doesn't know whether to keep some stuff in here or not, whether to "keep a door open here". However she said she thinks what she did was for the best, in terms of saying good bye to me. My thoughts are that none of this is new. That one Saturday was just an excuse to make a clean break. I still want her back and think she is making an "all or nothing" thing out of this, either she go to xxxx and be with her kids, which means to her closing off contact with me, or she stay in xxxx and give her kids up and be near me. I am thinking of emailing her tomorrow telling her that my sister told me she is leaving in two weeks and that I would like to see her before she goes. Please help! I don't think its hopeless... Even last Friday, she seemed so into me then she sent that email the following Monday. I responded essentially telling her it was not necessary to end our friendship. Since Monday, I have used NC except to tell her it was nice of her to invite my sister out. Any advice would be appreciated.
  8. This is a followup on a post I recently put up.. I met this very attractive girl Saturday night at my sister's wedding. Towards the end, I approached her and we had a good conversation. She asked plenty of questions and seemed very educated and polite. I asked for her number and she gave it to me. I waited until Monday night to call and she didn't answer. I called twice Tuesday night, no answer either. I said it would be my very last attempt tonight (Wednesday), and that's precisely when she picked up, finally. She told me that she doesn't pick up when unknown numbers call her, and especially does not return the call, so obviously she never knew it was me calling. Anyway, she was very nice, but apparently I caught her at a bad time - there was a lot of racket in the background. She was in her cousin's house and they were packing for a cruise they're going on this weekend. She still saved my number. She asked me if I could call her back tomorrow, or that she'd call me. I said great, nice talking to you, and that was it.. So the question is.. should I call her or should I wait for her to call me? I'm starting to think she isn't much of a phone person or something, but this girl seems very nice and attractive and I have a gut feeling I should pursue this. It'd be nice if she'd call - that's a reassuring way to know she's interested. Thanks guys
  9. Hey everyone, i have a question that seems simple on the surface, and even i had my answers to it, but looking at the angle of ''if it was me'' or the true severity puts it into a different perspective, ive got a boyfriend, and he isnt young so its more of a mature answer im looking for, but how can i help him cope through his parents divorce? His parents are great friends still and that has given a greater shock due to it being so unexpected, his father is moving out today and both him and his sister were only told three days ago, how do i help him cope? My boyfriend isnt used to opening up and has only done so recenetly to me, with me being the only person he speaks to, he seems to feel he has to set a positive and good role model for his younger 14 year old sister, he has been teaching professional guitar for a while and puts his emotion into his work, even though this is one way of relief i dont think he is actually gaining enough help from it. thankyou for any responce, Jx
  10. I work security in a niteclub and I met this bartender at the start of this summer. She's really nice and down to earth, I only saw her at work and I would spend my time chilling at her bar. About a month later I asked her out and I got her #. So i call but she went home to her parents house for the week. I call acouple more times in the following weeks but nobody ever answered. Then I see her at work and she apologizes for not calling back and explains her situation and I let it go. She says we should go out and takes my # down this time. So i call again and get the same result. A couple of days later I see her at work then she asks me to go to dinner. So we go and have a good time. I don't talk or see her for acouple of weeks because I had an operation. I call a couple more times and still nobody. At this point I was ready to give up on this girl. Last weekend I get a call from her out of the blue. She was calling from a payphone while shopping with her sister so I couldn't call back. I see her later on that night then she asks me to go to a bar for her friends birthday and I gladly go. I had such a good time,she spent the majority of time with me and my friends rather than with her sister and their friends. All the while constantly making sure that I was all right. At the end of the night she gives me this tight hug and tells me that she's glad I came. Then 20 minutes later she does the same thing. I need advice on this. Is she interested or not? She plays like she does but she never calls back. She told me that her grandmother is really ill and that she goes to her parents place during the week. By the time she gets back she has to work. HELP!
  11. "HEY, I'm in a friends/more than friends bine. I have seeked advice and help from people and hey all say the same thing. I wanna ya'll opinons. here's the story: i'm 19. me and my female friend, she 18, are really cool. we have been friends for about 3 years. I have never called a girl beautiful in my life, but I think she is. We always talk about each other, like teasing, crackin jokes etc. It's the basis of our friendship. But there is 1 problem, she Always mentioned that she thinks I think she likes me but she doesn't!!! I was at my friends house and she calls me up its like 12:30am and shes like come over!!! So I end up her crib till like 2am. We just talk and laugh and hit each other and stuff. We talk like twice a week and everytime she will say that. EVERYTIME!! So after 2 and half years of hearing that, she says it again one night on the phone and I get a bit upset. I ask why is she always stressing over that and how I never have said that I think she like me. I have always had deep down incredibly strong feelings for her but since she always sayin that statement, I never acted on it. so during this call, she says that i too upset and asks to speak wit my sister until I calm down. She ends tellin my sister to calm me down and stuff. So I do and she wants to talk to me again, I get back on da phone and she says she was sorry and in truth we should go see a movie. She asked me out. we talk everyday this week and she that was serious about the movie deal. Friday comes and I didn't have no paper cuz of books, I call her and wanted me to pay 4 everything!!! She gets an attitude dat I couldn't go and hangs up in my face. I call her back and leave a voice mail sayin why I can't go. She calls back like 10 minutes sayin dat she was sorry and that she just really wanted to go out with me. I didn't talk to her for like a week because that's how we are. the I call her and leave a voice mail sayin I did want to take her out and that this was my official asking her out deal. She calls me back and is talking about how she is a lady pimp and she got all these dudes on her trail and ow she want some dude and he so cool and she wanna settle down wit him, Then she ask if I wanna talk about my voicemail, I'm a bit pissed and its way past midnight, so I say no. we dont call e/o for a while, like 3 weeks. The she sees my ncle at a basketbal game and he asks her about me and her, get this, she says to him, she would stop talkin to all those guys If I ask, and she's waiting on me but I like I'm scared!!! this was on a sat. b4 xmas. Her b-day is xmas eve. we chat dat week, and I end up sending her 12 roses and a candy cane on her b-day/xmas eve. She calls me right when she get em says she loves them. I;m going to da game dat night, and she call me later dat night while I'm there. I tell i'm at da game and gets mad and says dat she would of come if she knew I was going. Then she says she wants to go to mexico for new years eve now she 18 and wants to go with me. A week rolls around I call her a day b4 ny eve. She say her moms is makin her go with her cousins to a party but I should take my sister wherever I go, just make sure my sister there at all times. Me and my sister need quality time. I see my sister everyday at home!! So da next day is new yers eve and 6:00 come she calls and says what are WE doing tonight? I;m like some girl wants me at did party so I'm headin there, She is a bit pissed and hangs up. She call me back and I say I'm going wit my Homies to a party, not with the girl. She says her and her cousins feel like stoppin by there so I'm like alright. But I fell asleep and I never went and she went with her cousins. We talk like every other day, one night on da phone she says when I'm going to admit I love her!! And she says that she thinks I think at times I stress over her but I adore her. She makes he listen to some poem this guy left on her voicemail and and she clowns him. we talk more and more then she calls me up says why I aint my sis game and I say cuz I'm handlin biz, she get mad and beg me to come. I ask her if she going to tues. game cuz I am in she like, yeah. 5 minutes later, she call and ask me to da movies!!! We go and we get up to da booth and I'm like you can go pay 4 yo ticket and she like dis is a date you pay 4 it. But da flick is sold out. I'm like oh well. She say she cold and want somethin to eat. I'm Like and? She she say lets hit up Red Lobster I call her bluff and be like fine. She like lets take yo car, I'm like naw I'll meet you there .She calls me again and sayss lets go to this other place, I'm like cool. She call me again as I'm Parking and is like were you at? I'm like i'm up front. we in da restaraunt and she says its a 45min wait. Then she fing two seats. We end up staying at this place for 2 and a half hours!!! It was grea!!! We ate, the just sat and chatted. Afterwards we were walking out and she like i'm cold i need someone to keep me warm.I'm like, wear a bigger jacket, then she like my hands is cold Ineed them to get warm, i'm like you should wore some mittens. Then She like lets go to Target and get some mittens. we get in my ca and she inside sayin this car could be good for us, i mean you!!! We get in Target and i'm like theres gloves at da clearance rack. she like fine. But its like 10pm and she like dats cool we can come back. That was on a friday, most times like b4 mentioned its a week b4 each side calls cuz we so busy. She call me Monday. She says I was in da middle of doing homework and I wanted to give you a call, she never does that stuff in da past. We chatted then she tells me to hold on. She gone for like 5-10min. She come back and I'm like where were you, she like I went to use da bathroom!! I'm like so why didn't you just call me back or somethin she gets mad and be like I can't go use da b-room while talkin to you!! Then at da game tues, I'm walkin accross da gym and I don't hear callin me. When she first came in, she was lookin 4 me butdidn't see and sat wit some friends. But n-e ways, she get mad and say I'm ignorin her. We end watchin da rest of da game wit e/o. Then this morning she call me at 7:40am and be like can I comeover cuz yo uncle needs to look at my car. I'm yeah, she come over and we check her car out she like can I come back after school? Cuz its a short day and ya uncle can wash my car. We like yeah. She come back at 12:45 and we chilll while unc hook her car up and we talk and laugh. She says that the next time I come to her house I need to come upstairs.She sits at my house, her 1st time there, and lays on my couch, drinks my Kool-aid and grabs the remote from my hand and turns the chanel. She leave at 2:15. So here's my deal. I'm head over heels for this girl But I'm not sure if she like me or not. I want to be with her, no doubt. I cherish every moment spent wit her. Everybody say she REALLY LIKE me but I aint sure. What should I do? Please help me!!! sorry for da lond read but I felt da whole story is important." Since then we've talked every other day. After that thursday thing with her car, she called me a 9:00am Sunday morning. She said she hadn't talked to me in while and wanted to check up on me, (something in the past she would never do) we talked for like 40min. She was on the freeway and was listening to Tevin Cambell ( a singer) and then she went on to start singing me the song of "The way you touch me, and the way you love me" or something with those lyrics. She's so funny. My sis had another game and I walked into the Gym and I see my mom I sit with my mom for like 5min. I then Stand up and she was chatting with my uncle, then she calls me over there and I go sit above her. I think she wanted me to sit right by her, but I sat 1 row above her. After like 5min. She turns and says Why are you sittin up there. I say Were should I really be sittin, She taps the open space right next to her and I say oh I see. Something happened during the game that stopped me from movin, Damn I wanted to too. She looked good as hell. Halftime came and she and takes a pom-pom and just slaps me for no reason. I slap her with mine and we fight and laugh. We then start talkin but we can't cuz its obvious that when we look at eachother we can't keep a straight face. We ended up flirting for like another 30min. My uncle said after the game, all she did the whole time was watch me.We haven't talked much for about a week now. My mom tells me that I should listen to her ( my mom). She said she can tell, from a fmale's p.o.v. that she likes me. This is what everybody that I have asked says also. I wanna believe the girl of my dreams likes me, but until it comes out her mouth. I'm still unsure. Your advice is greatly appreciated, again.
  12. I didn't know where to put this. i will try to keep it short and sweet. I don't want to live with my parents anymore but im too young and prospects of me moving out in near future are far from real. I don't want to live with my family anymore because i feel supressed by them. like i cant be myself. i have a few mental health issues. i know this. i cant keep up the act all my life tho. pls help. My parents are good parents but i hav a lot to live up to from my sister and so cant be myself. any ideas of what i should do?
  13. HEY, I'm in a friends/more than friends bine. I have seeked advice and help from people and hey all say the same thing. I wanna ya'll opinons. here's the story: i'm 19. me and my female friend, she 18, are really cool. we have been friends for about 3 years. I have never called a girl beautiful in my life, but I think she is. We always talk about each other, like teasing, crackin jokes etc. It's the basis of our friendship. But there is 1 problem, she Always mentioned that she thinks I think she likes me but she doesn't!!! I was at my friends house and she calls me up its like 12:30am and shes like come over!!! So I end up her crib till like 2am. We just talk and laugh and hit each other and stuff. We talk like twice a week and everytime she will say that. EVERYTIME!! So after 2 and half years of hearing that, she says it again one night on the phone and I get a bit upset. I ask why is she always stressing over that and how I never have said that I think she like me. I have always had deep down incredibly strong feelings for her but since she always sayin that statement, I never acted on it. so during this call, she says that i too upset and asks to speak wit my sister until I calm down. She ends tellin my sister to calm me down and stuff. So I do and she wants to talk to me again, I get back on da phone and she says she was sorry and in truth we should go see a movie. She asked me out. we talk everyday this week and she that was serious about the movie deal. Friday comes and I didn't have no paper cuz of books, I call her and wanted me to pay 4 everything!!! She gets an attitude dat I couldn't go and hangs up in my face. I call her back and leave a voice mail sayin why I can't go. She calls back like 10 minutes sayin dat she was sorry and that she just really wanted to go out with me. I didn't talk to her for like a week because that's how we are. the I call her and leave a voice mail sayin I did want to take her out and that this was my official asking her out deal. She calls me back and is talking about how she is a lady pimp and she got all these dudes on her trail and ow she want some dude and he so cool and she wanna settle down wit him, Then she ask if I wanna talk about my voicemail, I'm a bit pissed and its way past midnight, so I say no. we dont call e/o for a while, like 3 weeks. The she sees my ncle at a basketbal game and he asks her about me and her, get this, she says to him, she would stop talkin to all those guys If I ask, and she's waiting on me but I like I'm scared!!! this was on a sat. b4 xmas. Her b-day is xmas eve. we chat dat week, and I end up sending her 12 roses and a candy cane on her b-day/xmas eve. She calls me right when she get em says she loves them. I;m going to da game dat night, and she call me later dat night while I'm there. I tell i'm at da game and gets mad and says dat she would of come if she knew I was going. Then she says she wants to go to mexico for new years eve now she 18 and wants to go with me. A week rolls around I call her a day b4 ny eve. She say her moms is makin her go with her cousins to a party but I should take my sister wherever I go, just make sure my sister there at all times. Me and my sister need quality time. I see my sister everyday at home!! So da next day is new yers eve and 6:00 come she calls and says what are WE doing tonight? I;m like some girl wants me at did party so I'm headin there, She is a bit pissed and hangs up. She call me back and I say I'm going wit my Homies to a party, not with the girl. She says her and her cousins feel like stoppin by there so I'm like alright. But I fell asleep and I never went and she went with her cousins. We talk like every other day, one night on da phone she says when I'm going to admit I love her!! And she says that she thinks I think at times I stress over her but I adore her. She makes he listen to some poem this guy left on her voicemail and and she clowns him. we talk more and more then she calls me up says why I aint my sis game and I say cuz I'm handlin biz, she get mad and beg me to come. I ask her if she going to tues. game cuz I am in she like, yeah. 5 minutes later, she call and ask me to da movies!!! We go and we get up to da booth and I'm like you can go pay 4 yo ticket and she like dis is a date you pay 4 it. But da flick is sold out. I'm like oh well. She say she cold and want somethin to eat. I'm Like and? She she say lets hit up Red Lobster I call her bluff and be like fine. She like lets take yo car, I'm like naw I'll meet you there .She calls me again and sayss lets go to this other place, I'm like cool. She call me again as I'm Parking and is like were you at? I'm like i'm up front. we in da restaraunt and she says its a 45min wait. Then she fing two seats. We end up staying at this place for 2 and a half hours!!! It was grea!!! We ate, the just sat and chatted. Afterwards we were walking out and she like i'm cold i need someone to keep me warm.I'm like, wear a bigger jacket, then she like my hands is cold Ineed them to get warm, i'm like you should wore some mittens. Then She like lets go to Target and get some mittens. we get in my ca and she inside sayin this car could be good for us, i mean you!!! We get in Target and i'm like theres gloves at da clearance rack. she like fine. But its like 10pm and she like dats cool we can come back. That was on a friday, most times like b4 mentioned its a week b4 each side calls cuz we so busy. She call me Monday. She says I was in da middle of doing homework and I wanted to give you a call, she never does that stuff in da past. We chatted then she tells me to hold on. She gone for like 5-10min. She come back and I'm like where were you, she like I went to use da bathroom!! I'm like so why didn't you just call me back or somethin she gets mad and be like I can't go use da b-room while talkin to you!! Then at da game tues, I'm walkin accross da gym and I don't hear callin me. When she first came in, she was lookin 4 me butdidn't see and sat wit some friends. But n-e ways, she get mad and say I'm ignorin her. We end watchin da rest of da game wit e/o. Then this morning she call me at 7:40am and be like can I comeover cuz yo uncle needs to look at my car. I'm yeah, she come over and we check her car out she like can I come back after school? Cuz its a short day and ya uncle can wash my car. We like yeah. She come back at 12:45 and we chilll while unc hook her car up and we talk and laugh. She leave at 2:15. So here's my deal. I'm head over heels for this girl But I'm not sure if she like me or not. I want to be with her, no doubt. I cherich every moment spent wit her. Everybody say she REALLY LIKE me but I aint sure. What should I do? Please help me!!! sorry for da lond read but I felt da whole story is important.
  14. I'm 17. My mom just had a baby and I'm very happy for her and I love them both and all. But my mom yells at me without a reason like once or twice a week, talks to me like I did something bad when all I wanted was just to talk to her. Just now I walked into her room to check on her and the baby but she was rude. Then I asked something about my baby sister because she spitted up 3 times today. She statred yelling like "damn it she's fine!!" Ok, I don't know know babies. I know that they spit up but she's never done it this often (2 weeks old). So I was worried! And she was so rude to me like I'm supposed to know it all. She's never going to admit that she's at fault. Tomorrow she's just gonna start talking to me like nothing had ever happened. But I'm sick of this! I'm a person too! I never talk back to her, just try to be polite and want to stop her from talking to me like that. Sometimes when I ask questions like "when is my sister going to start smiling, walking, etc..." she just gives me an eye roll as of she was some jerkish girl in school that hates me! What's going on? I can't handle it anymore! I cry all the time!
  15. I just thought I'd let everyone know what happened. Well, this girl at work, S, came to my house after work one night (we work 2nd shift, 3pm-12am), and used my computer because she needed to do something online for school and didn't have a computer. So we did that and we just talked until like 2am. I really like this girl so i wanted to take it slow, maybe a mistake? Anyway, when she went to leave I let her follow me to the gas station and then to where she would know where she was at. When we were at the gas station, I asked her out for yesterday evening. I didn't mention a time or where we would eat or anything like that. so, yesterday at around 1:30/2:00 pm she called saying that her sister called her and asked if she wanted to go with her on a gambling boat. And that she never gets to see her sister so she decided to go with her instead. And she said that she felt bad for cancelling on the first time. I dont know her that well, so i can't judge her on this aspect. But i'm always skeptical from the start, but i never just not believe someone until they lie to me. But from what i've told you, does she sound sincere? Also, how soon should I call her for another date? I WILL probably see her monday at work and possibly tuesday at school and work. -----------------------------------------------------------------------More Background Information--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The first time I ever really talked to her was at school. I saw her, said "hi" and we talked for a few minutes. I walked her to her car and she gave me a ride back. Her car was a mess lol...and she said "the next time you get in my car, i promise it'll be clean" lol Everytime I see her and we're talking now, she's always smiling and really open about stuff. ....I just need to know how long I should wait to ask her out again. I don't want to seem desperate, because i'm not. And I don't want her thinking i'm mad or want to ignore her or anything because she cancelled on me, because I'm not mad and I don't want to ignore her.
  16. OK guys dis is my 1st post on ere so bear wif me. K i have a girls in mind but im nt sure if she is intersted in goin out wif me. Im a btr than avg lookin 16 yo and prty confident in most things. However, the prospect of askin a girl out scares the, eh, outa me. Anyways, she is in the year below me, and is my frineds sister. i waz ova at his house and i met her briefly there. she seems nice and waz prty hot. i have been txtin her and tlkin to her on msn... i thinks she likes me alrite but im nt sure if she wud wana go out wif me. also, wud it be appropiate to ask her even tho i dnt know her that well...lol, also, she is my m8s sister, is dat a problem? also, how should i go about askin her out? i will prolly not see her face to face for a loong time. thanx
  17. I am back on dating scene again, and generally I have always been with people who are anywhere from my age within a couple months, to 3 years or so older. Lately I have been dating more guys that are 5 years older range, by choice as they are generally closer to my own emotional maturity/relationship goals ideals at the moment (I am 25 by the way). I know of course there are exceptions, but in general, guys to close to my age are at a very different place than me! I ask, as there is a guy I have talked to a couple times, that my sister introduced to me. He is funny, has a great smile, warm eyes, great attitude, he is a cyclist/triathlete so we share those interests, has a great job (doctor now with GP, though used to practice surgery), loves life from the little I know...and is emotionally mature (comes from a tough background as is a political refuge from Columbia). We have not gone on a date yet, though are going after he writes another medical exam next week as he is studying, but he was at my family's Thanksgiving dinner last week, and we talked a while. My only hesitancy is that he is I believe 34 years old, and I am not sure I can get past that. I mean, it is not that old, and he is very fit and has a very youthful attitude so more than makes up for it I think, but I am just not sure I can get past that...though I know there are people with far larger differences! I just don't want to lead him on if it will be a problem for me though...I just don't know yet if it will be! My sister of course is encouraging as she is 18 and won't date anyone under 26 or so, so does not see why it bothers me...lol. Anyway, just throwing the question out there Thanks!
  18. I fell in love with someone over the internet.We used to know each other because we were neighbors and he went to school with my sister but we haven't seen each other for about 10 years now because we live in different states now.We met again in our hometown's website,started out as casual friends which eventually grew into a full blown romance.We have this cyberrelationship going on for a year now until recently I said something which offended him which ended with a break up.He wanted to see me naked via video cam which I refused,he asked why and I carelessly said that I don't trust him completely yet considering that we haven't even met in person during the course of our relationship.I just didn't feel comfortable giving so much of myself until we take more step other than chatting,emailing and occasional phone calls.I really felt that he loved me and I never thought that he will give up on us that easily.I apologized several times and tried to explained to him what I really meant but his mind just seemed to be made up that things between us is not going to work.I know I should just forget him but it's a lot easier said than done.Although we never met during the course of our relationship,the pain that I feel is all too real.Thanks for any comment.
  19. Me and my girlfriend were going through a little rough patch so i suggested just having a week of space to gather ourselves (thinking for the best for both of us, i wanted to make our relationship stronger) she didn't accept this too well and well things sort of blew up! she e-mailed me a bunch of times saying that we love eachother and are meant to be and as soon as we get back from vacation she wanted things to be back to normal but better. this was on the friday that she told me this. we both went away for the weekend (different places). she went away with her sister and her sisters bf and his friend. she was really emotionally upset at this time, at this time i know she used the available guy as a shoulder to cry on (and im sure he put things in her head at the same time too, she is a beautiful girl) well as it turns out as soon as they got back from vacation she said that things were better like this and that she thinks that for both of us. we had little contact for the next few weeks (i wouldnt phone her, i would leave her to call me and she would). each time she called we sort of talked about the relationship. i want her back more than anything i ever wanted in life before. She says that she always wants to be friends and in my life because she cares and she says she still loves me but in a different way (things do not change that quickly after a weekend away) well as it turns out now, i find out she is dating this guy. i know he is not her type and he is the reason for her being so doubtful of our future together. now i know that the reason they are together now is a rebound thing and i know that it will not work out. I recently told her that i no longer could handle being friends as it tears me up inside. SHe knows i want more than friends and i know she is not prepared to give that to me. i told her i would no longer e-mail or phone her and i wanted her to do the same until something changes in her life and she is ready to perhaps work things out. I know she will come back to me eventually, we had such a good thing.... i guess i know what went wrong and that is there is another guy that was helping her get through her sad times and since he was there as a shoulder to cry on she thinks he is a good guy??? i really want to strangle him and i know if i ever see them together i couldnt take it. and that is a main reason as to why friends wouldn't work. i know she wouldn't like it if i was to get another girlfriend too. which i will not do. i am not ready to date and i KNOW what i want. any kind words?
  20. Okay this is kinda weird but bare with me. Me and my friend were having an intimate convo about family. And then she said she had to tell a rumor that she heard a yr ago about my family but didnt know how to ask me. So i convince her to tell me and she said that the ppl from my country mothers and daughters are gossiping and saying that my 2 older sisters are actually my half sisters (I have 2 older sisters and 1 older brother)..so obviously when i heard this i didnt believe it but u never know. My friend said that if i told my family then i had to lie about where i heard it from..so then 30 minutes later i call my brother and ask if it was true and he said no. Without me knowing he calls the rest of my fam to tell them what i had asked him. I went home later that night and asked my mom sneakily if it was true and she said no too. The next day, my brother called me and told me it was true. And told me that 2 years ago my father and sat him down and told him the truth....Which was that when my mom was 14 yrs old she had married a drunk and he abused her and she had my 2 older sisters with him...then they escaped and moved to italy where she met my dad. The whole reason that im truly upset is that i feel betrayed by my fam...like im 20 yrs old and no one told me this and i had to hear about my families history through gossip and rumors.. This all happened like 2 days ago and even tho i know nothing has changed i sort of feel depressed about it. This family has been so cookie cutter to me and hearing this just confuses me...and i dont feel like i can trust anyone!!!! I just want to know what you guys think and if you think im over reacting with this...THANKS SO MUCH FOR UR SUPPORT!
  21. My former boyfriend and I broke up at the end of the summer. He goes to school in Massachusetts, I live a few hours away. He started dating another girl shortly after we broke up, a girl that he's been friends with for years. His reasons for the breakup were: I can't handle you - You're too good for me - I have to grow up. Very true reasons, in all honesty. We've been in contact these past few months. He never brings up the other girl, not even to his family. I'm not threatened by her in the least, but you know, it bugs me. He gave me his phone number, asked me to call. I told him to call me, and he did. We've spoken on the phone several times, we play a lot of phone tag, he texts me, and has expressed an interest in seeing me while he's home (for a mere week) on his Christmas break. He's also not bringing her down for Christmas. His sister is my friend and she told me that originally she (the girl) was going to pick him up from his house and drive him back up, but he asked her (his sister) if she would please drive him back up to school... I dunno, just a little thing to throw in there. He's been ridiculously weird lately. He's constantly on my website (he doesn't know I know that), looking at pictures, etc. Also, he contacted me on a screen name I had used a couple of years ago (before I met him) the other day, and it threw me for a loop. I'm looking forward to seeing him, but I'm nervous. I'm sure he's a bit nervous, too, but to what extent - I have no idea. While I don't have any crazy expectations, a huge part of me really wants something about "us" to come up when we see each other. I dunno if I should initiate any talk or what... I would assume not to, but I feel like I deserve a little more clarity on what happened, and some truth about how he feels about me and about how I feel about him. Any advice? I'm nervous!
  22. Ok so this is kinda long but there's been sooo much drama. So I live a few blocks away from my best friend. And a little over a year ago her husband died of cancer. The same day that her husband died my b/f of like three years went out and married some other girl (totally blindsided me i didn't know he was cheating) I also was living with my older sisters b/f while she was away at school. So at the beginning of the summer my sisters boyfriend got all coked up and told me that he was in love with me and couldn't stop thinking about me, the whole nine. So I told my sister and she said that he was just drugged and that I shouldn't kick him out. I said ok, because she was in law school and taking finals and didn't have time for that drama. I was also a little scared of him now since he's got this crush on me. So i had my ex that got married move back in to make sure that there was no trouble. He had gotten his marrage annauled and said that he freaked when my friends husband ( his best friend) died. So I gave him a second chance, and he stayed for a little over a month. Then he's back at his crap again ( he's a big druggie too) so, we broke up again. Then it's just me and my sisters boyfriend again. He had sobered up since that one day so everything was going ok. Then about a week before my sister had to take The Bar Exam, i found her boyfriend hiding under my bed. He had been there for at least three hours and had gone in there while i was taking a shower. So he had to go... So I kicked him out and everything calmed down again. Except now my sister thinks that i must have done something to provoke this behavior, so me and her got in a fight and haven't talked in like a month. Then I was on the internet and saw my ex from like way back in the day. He's like the one that got away. Me and him had a really good relationship that i managed to screw up real bad. and the last time that I talked to him he was unbelievable angry with me. So I start talking to him and he wants to talk to me. And we've been talking for like a month. It's slow going, and it's probably not really going anywhere at all, but I really like talking to him again and just want to enjoy whatever time we have together. Ok that's all the background. now we get into the real problems. So last week I decided that I was moving, just accross town, but out of the neighborhood i live in. I really need to get out of this house. It's so full of bad memories and I can't afford it and I'm pretty much done with the roomate thing. My best friend freaked. She had already been really upset about me talking to my ex and I tried to talk to her about it. She says she's fine with it and she's happy for me but then she does things like call real early in the morning and ask me to do things with her when she knows that I stayed over at his house. So anyway I tell her that I'm moving and she's doing the same passive aggresive crap. So i'm tired of it. Because I was there for her the whole time after her husband died. and i'm there for her now. but i can't stop my life for hers. So I stopped talking to her at the beginning of the week. Then yesterday my ex ( the married one) comes by. Which he and my best friend talk so I think that she told him to come over and talk to me. So he comes over, all drugged up. Telling me he's remarrying his wife and that she is preganant. He also tells me that he has some disease and is dying ( I think the disease is cocaine) So I'm really upset now. and i feel very betrayed by my friend. And i feel very violated that this guy just comes over to my house whenever he feels like it. And worst i'm too upset to talk to the guy i'm trying to talk to. And I think that if he finds out that I have all this drama in my life he's not going to want to talk to me.
  23. Hello friends, I've posted several times before, but in the next week I suppose I will have more concrete answers to a lot of questions I've been having. My ex and I have been broken up for about 3 months now. He's been dating a girl for convenience reasons (whatever), and essentially we broke up because he couldn't handle me... felt threatened by my career, all that stuff. I was wonderful to him, though. Anyway, we've been in contact the last couple of months, and he comes home from school today. The first email we exchanged, he said we should go have dinner "like old times". I responded with "Well, I'll be up to see your sister and the family for Christmas, so we'll see each other." Then, he sends me something in the mail about when he's going to be home (the exact dates). The next time I spoke to him I didn't mention anything about it. Yesterday, while at a luncheon, I got a voicemail from him apologizing for not getting back to me sooner, but that he just finished his last exam, etc. Again, he went on about the whole "hanging out" thing. He said "We should definitely hang out" and then "If we could work something out, that'd be great." I obviously want to hang out with him, but I don't want it to seem like I'm hanging onto his being home like a desperate puppy. Also, his gal pal was supposed to come pick him up and bring him back up to school, instead he convinced his sister (my friend) to drive him back up. I have not mentioned a single thing other than the "I'll be up on Christmas" thing to him in regards to us making plans. I mean, it's pretty obvious he wants to see me... but why? I guess the answer is pretty much in front of me, he wants to see what might happen... I want to make sure I take the best approach and be a mystery to him. Considering we've been broken up such a short amount of time, do you think it's possible he still has those feelings for me and wants to see me for "other" reasons?
  24. hi me and my b/f recently got back together and we were doing ok but now he is starting to get right back where he started. i mean he said he would change but he hasnt. he still acts inmuture about crap. and it drives me incane. i love him but i wish i didnt act this way.... what can i do to get through to him that he isnt being fair to me. i mean i cant hang out with my friends og go any where without him knowing or geting all huffy about it. i hate to say this but hes starting to act like my older sisters ex husband. and i dont want that .so what can i do???? i am really confused about it and its driving me up the frickin wall.. please give any advice you can to help..... thanx in advance.
  25. My boyfriends sister is now 8 months pregnant. (i just found out she offical found out yesturday) and now im going to be an aunt. theres just so much to plan for. My boyfriend and her live together and i know this changes alot but also she wants us to be the childs guardian (since hes 18, even thu im only 16 )i dont know what to think or say im in remote shock right now. i know there is alot of time so i should calm down but its just so exciting. Except knowing who the father is... (he cheated on heather for an excuse to break up with her)
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