PavPPZ1

it shows you are looking outside of your relationship, and that kinda sucks... see whats wrong maybe try to fix... gl

you need to start paying for everything. I bet he will start paying for you.. Like you said, he has had bad experience with ex gf, now he has made it a rule for himself not to spend any money on girls no matter what. He wsa screwed and now he is being cheap. Its all about reverse psychology. Unless he is lying about his past gf andspending money, he will prolly change his ways. I am sure if you guys start dating things will change.. if you are happy with him try to be patient and see wher it will go. As I believe this is only your 5th date.. PS. You should never openly critisize a guy, ie. tell him he's cheap or any other thing. It puts the two of you in a bad place right from the getgo.. GL

i hate hearing stories like this, because you guys let yourself get walked on, while you did nothing wrong, your wife should beliving in a studio flat, now you. There is much truth to our justice system and it was reflected in OJ's case.. I dont know man,..

Teacup, I have been following your posts regarding this love affair. Your latest words seem a little different then before, where these ones have more love and care in them. You say the two of you have only been on 4 dates and you enjoy spending time with this guy because of how he treats you and how good he makes you feel. I will open two points for you to think about, in reference to this guy and some guys. He is not the only guy who does not call girls back. I myself might not call a girl back even if I truley like her. Some guys just take to life and dating a little different. I personally dont like to seem needy or pushy, and this sometimes will mean I wont call. Although, when I do see someone who I am really attracted to I would be just as nice and kind to make our time together very pleasant. This usually results in always getting a call back until you stop being nice. Lastly you have to learn to feel with your heart. I think this guy really likes you and you two share a strong attraction. Know that at this point he will not call you back, and some guys wont, its a guy thing, but after a point he will call you as much as you call him. The cards are not in his hands and so he wont call. But based on waht you say it seems like your heart is telling you that he truley likes you. Also that both of you are very sexually attracted to one another. Plus, you should pm me your picture, I am curious how u look, as myself he prolly likes sexy sisters

Hey man, I am not married 23 years old and trying to figure life out as it is hitting me in the face. Your story is extremely compelling and it only makes one wonder if I can even give you any real answers or advice. Except that I should like to say that you are an exceptional father and husband based on what you have shared with us. Your incredible self control and understanding is truley inspiring. To the tee your handling of the situation has been text book on selflessness. Your care and consern for your daughters issues are genuinely heart warming. I will say that in these simple aspects I should see you finding your happiness and no need for anything else. Based on the fact that you are a great guy. The fact remains, you have bigger fish to fry. I will be here as a man to share my oppinion on your situation. The issue of your wife, and what I see her as doing. I will bring to light what you are not already seeing based on what you said: Your wife is doing the exact opposite of what you are doing, she is putting herself and her interests before you, your marrage, and your daughter. Your wife has taken the initiative to be unfaithful and decietful to you her sole partner. I perhaps should not share my oppinion on this, but as of now if this were my wife there would be no future for us. If a person chooses to disrespect and disregard you to this extent, you must take every precaution and necessary measure, not only to teach that person a lesson, but also disassociate from them. This is my experience from my short years, when life shows a symptom of an underlying cause, when you stop seeing the symtom for a period of time, its only time before it reappears. Your wife lying is not something that will change. She is this kind of a person. The fact also remains that she has continued to be decietful to you even after she has taken advantage of you. When she returned, she lied about getting back together, only for the reason of having a place to stay. All of these factors and perhaps others which I have left out are key indicators that she is conserned only for her own interests and none of anyone around her. That being said, I have to take a step back and approach your situation from an entirely different angle. What actually happened here? Your wife was following a pattern which you guys together initiated. You created the idea that it was ok to sleep around, as long as you are together. This risky behavior, has overtime translated into on going secretave affairs. Is there anyone to blame for this, obviously not, you were both curious when you started this. Unfortunately things are very difficult to control, and this obviously went beyond yours and apparently her control. She began to want sex outside her marriage. Taking a step back once again, and accepting a possibility that you can make changes, and bring an end to this behavior. Accepting this possibility you immediately direct your attention at the obvious factors of importance; including your marriage, your daughter, your happiness, and her happiness. These aspects might seem like what you might need for re-establishing yourself a happy life. If you fixed your wife your marrige and everything would fall into place. At this point you have to be the judge, you know her best, you have been with her the longest, and you are going to live with your decision. Iwould like to try to wrap this up in an overall summation of aspects of importance and what should be of interest to you in all this. You are a 30 year old man, who is intelligent, interesting, and with something to share with the world. The biggest mistake in all of this that you can make is sacrificing yourself for the sake of your daughter, your marriage, and your wife. I have seen people get sucked into a relationship and loose sight of whats important in life. People become so detached from the outside world that they completely lose themselves. This is the scariest thing that might happen. If you come to a point that you hold your personal value only in the existence of your family and marriage. You have failed yourself as a humanbeing. You must always remain an individual, strong and bold. Always remember to stand out, and maintain a border of respect which no one may penetrate and take advantage of. I have made these the guiding principles in my own life, and as a result I feel confident no matter what happens. Because if you hold value in yourself then nothing that happens outside of you can ever effect your equilibrium or balance, because you are internally sound and stable. Although life is extremely complicated, cruel, and unpredictable, I think that regardless of what is said in here, your final decision on a course of action must come from with you. Your heart must guide your choices and your path for life. The only problem is that our hearts oftentimes lie and mislead us, especially in times of pain and difficulty. This is one of those times where you must be very acute and rational in order to make the right choice. I have told you what I would do in your situation, you must do what you feel you must. But above all else, do not lose sight of you, when this is the last thing on your mind. Friend good luck, hope all goes well

Hi, you are a very inspiring girl, reading your words makes me feel happy. I like girls who think like you, its nice to know you are out there, and hopefully more then 1 .

LOL, Well, at least you are rationalizing this, god forbid theyever find out. Life is too complicated to have answers for this question in a forum. But basically try your best not to cheat. If it happens ask some supreme being for advice, I wouldnt know the best answer. There is something to the idea that ignorance is bliss, but isit? "He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore" Sigmund Freud If you think you can keep something like that a secret from your SO then all power to you, but as its said you live with them the rest of your life. Fragile beauty dictates the soul of life, uncirtainty and chance serve as your guide, ashore lay dormant is your fate.

yea, he will call u back, or he wouldnt give you his #, its possibly some kind of an extra ordinary situation or you have a wrong #. Regardless try to call one more time. see what happens if no response most likely somek ind of misunderstanding. GL

well, I couldnt imagine dating someone who was an escort, especially if you slept with other guys. If you gave that up then its a good start. From here you guys just need to find a new beginning together, and go from there. I would recommend getting a place together and getting different jobs. This way you can both support your livelyhood. Seems like both of you can go out and get dates, so if you are ready I would try to settle down with this one relationship. Good luck

Hey, you and the father really need to have a heart to heart, this is something that the both of you need to decide. It sounds that you pregnancy is in its infancy, so I suggest that you still give it some very hard thought, because if both of you dont agree on this, your child will grow up without a father. Thats why you should always practice safe sex, but in this case its past that point. Try to talk to this guy, and get his perspective on what he will do if you have this kid.

I just dont trust religion, and church, it causes more problems then it does good. More people come out screwed up from strict religious homes then out of any other enviornment. For crying out loud how long will it take people to realize religion was invented by people to keep people under control in former civilizations. Get over it, we have already gone to the moon, an atom bomb in previous civilizations would have been interpreted as an act of god, and probably might have made it into the bible. Its so lame, including the fact that his parents are on his case about him having sex 9 months ago its natural you are both young people. Religion is LAME, so damn stupid it makes me naucious. A book written before sience and physics was invented, and its being held above everything else. Wake the heck up!!! and smell the roses.... I think I can understand why people come out of religious homes messed up, its mainly because people who follow religion must have mental issues, how else cna you explain it. This very basic reason is why peolpe out of religious homes have mental issues as well.

His parents have problems, thast all i am saying... you need to talk to him and tell him either he stands up for what he wants or you are moving on. Good luck

In the end, the attractiveness is just in looking healthy. If you are a little bigger but you have bright skin and vibrance you will still be attractive, even if you are not the supermodel body build. Past the first attractive phase the person will love you for who you are on the inside. So its a matter of looking attractive enough for your partner so that the two of you give eachother a chance after that its your inner beauty that takes over.

If you include plans for his kid, it will mean a lot to him. As you might imagine he is a package deal, there is no him without his son. A father is very proud about thir kids and will not trade them for anything in the world. You would have to approach it in this fassion as there is no other way. Dont be afraid to make the suggestions, as he might be uncumfortable to offer you to hang out with him and his son. So you making the first step will be the best way to break the idea to him that you are ok with dating the both of them GL

Ok, it seems like you guys are just getting over your initial infatuation with one another, where all you need to do was look at one another to achieve ultimate happiness. This is something a lot of young people go through, and its completely normal. As of right now you are at the point where you guys are both a little frustrated because these initial extreme feelings have begun to pass and you are beginning the first part of your relationship where the two of you can start loving one another for who you are. The lust-love relationship phase is ending, you are now at the point that you can spend more time away from one another but it makes you angry and frustrated because you want to want to be with your SO as badly as you did when you first began dating. The first few weeks or months you were inseperable, including not going to to work to be with one another. All you wanted was to be held by one another and feel your lovers touch. This is normal and its how you handle this transition that will determine how you will continue your relationship. Right now both you and your BF need to take extra care in being nice to one another, as your emotions are at their peak, you might offend one another and cause problems out of personal pride. You may want to start having casual dates, and more time appart just to transition yourself, this will help build a foundation for a strong and lasting relationship. The kind of relationship where trust, respect and appreciation of one another will be the founding blocks. It takes a lot of thought, and self control to keep everything steady without any extreme aspects that can hurt the both of you. Just keep it in mind to try to keep your conversations light, and continue to appreciate one another, start doing other leasurly activities aside from just laying together. This will be a good start. Good luck!

ouch, sounds like you guys need to get more creative about sex. From what I see there is just not enough sex drive on both your parts. The best way to remedy this is to be creative and make it into fun games. Iremember in college my gf and I would play games, and by the end of the game both of us would be naked, and then it goes from there.. just think of cool stuff and it should help... GL

Believe it or not, highly educated and creative marketing professionals, tend to be more valued in a company then the accountant. The reason for this is that marketing is what drives the business, accounting is responsible for polishing the engine. Both of which are important, but as you seem very determined and on the path to higher education, your choice is perhaps the wiser one, and it will open many doors for you. Regardless to the fact that your family has so many ties in the accounting industry, if you are successful in your field you will find more oppertunities and real genuine value in yourself as a whole in the end. GL

Get an abortion sweetheart, the alternative is flipping a coin, and there's your father there's no easy answer to this question but sometimes fate decides what happens, and in this case you are the bringer of fate. In your hands, you hold the fate of that unborn child, will he grow up, and be a great person, or shall he/she be cut down before ever whitnessing a ray of light. Or, you decide the fate of an unsuspecting father, who may or may not be. There is no right answer, unfortunateley this choice will have to be about what you want. Good luck

Ok, here is exactly what happened. This guy wanted to have you, at the moment that he was aggressive and pushing. He tried, and tried, you pushed him away and kept your boundries, this made him mad and this is a sophisticated way of him showing you his tantrum. He feels that now he needs to be distant and cold for you to realize what you are missing out on. Well if you are distant and cold, he will most likely change his attitute. GL

Sweetheart, At this point, you need a big change in your life. I would say you need to get out of your parents house and move on. Right now you are stuck on dwelling on yoru past and in the custody of your parents. If you go on your own you will have the oppertunity of avoiding that which has hurt you for so long. In as mcuh as you may not think so, your parents are part of the problem of your pain. Every day you think you want to let them know, but it has been so long that you are afraid to say anything. You have to take yourself away from this situation, and take control of yoru own life. This is the best thing you can do for yourself right now.

A bit of honesty. I get turned off if a girl is over weight, I cant help it. I lose my attraction. But on the flipside, there are guys who like bigger girls, and do not mind that at all. It is always better to look fit, as its more attractive. Thought sometimes to get that look it takes so much sacrifice that its not even worth it. It might take years of watching what you eat, exersizing, and eating healthy. For the reward of having guys look at you and drool because of your god body. But in the long run is it worth it? Since you would have to give up your life style and change your eating and exersizing habbits. I guess its a personal choice, or you can take your chances with guys liking or disliking you for your weight. Its all about what the important things to you are. As much as people try to call guys shallow and this and that when they dislike bigger girls. I look at it like this, for the same reasons gay guys are gay. Most guys, are predisposed to like attractive, instead of overweight girls. This is a fact of life, you can critisize it as much as you want. The reality is you either find guys who are attracted to this kind of physique or you slim down. I do not mean to be rude or mean, just rather would like to give you some truth on the matter. GL

He is not suiasidal, he is using that as a vice, and that is even worse! Never allow people to use suacidal as leverage against you, it teaches them a bad lesson, and you suffer. GL

hey, It seems that you are sure of what it is you want with life. That is perhaps the greatest thing that might have happened out of all of this. Your inner light is what you need to follow, especially if it shines bright like a rainbow. You still have some hurdles to overcome, but you are on the right track and I am sure there are many guys out there for you. And remember, do not be afraid of the light as it comes into sight. If you are feeling a breeze do not fall to your knees. Keep your eyes on the prize, and good things are bound to arise. Good luck champ!

just be nice and keep it friendship, no need for anything more or less. Turn it into a friendship if you can. Just keep your boundaries. GL

AHh, well it seems like this has become a competition between siblings and FCT, about who can get more of the OS interested without flashing their own cards. Go wild, but keep your objectives in mind. Do not hurt the people you actually like, this could come back to haunt you. Another thing to keep in mind, what ever goes around comes around. So whatever you dish out expect in return at some point or another. This is a rule of thumb to try to live by. Not saying you are doing anything cruel or crazy, but whenever there is competition it can get out of hand. So I suggest tryign to keep that perspective in mind. Have fun but not so much fun that you are leaving deformed carcuses in your wake (some holloween references, but u get the message). Lastly, to keep mind, always play it safe, or be sorry. Have fun GL