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AwdreeHpburn

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Everything posted by AwdreeHpburn

  1. AwdreeHpburn
    I totally agree with Keenan. I too am a smiler. Regardless or attraction. Especially if I notice the guy looking at me a lot, then I sorta feel obligated to at least smile. But I think Keenan said it all. Look for other signs besides just a smile, longer gaze, frequent looks etc. And a good rule of thumb, go with your instinct. If it feels flirtatious, it prolly is. If it you're not sure, it was prolly just a polite smile.
  2. AwdreeHpburn
    LOL! ...now leave me be That was a beautiful poem but how 'bout an original work??
  3. AwdreeHpburn
    One day at a time Iwantherback! And this was a good one. Good for you. I'm really glad. And things will just keep getting better. Keep posting and keep re-reading your previous posts and responses, more and more things will click and more and more time will pass and it will just keep getting easier. WOOOO HOOOO Another day, another victory.
  4. AwdreeHpburn
    When you say you found a way to e-mail her...what does that mean? Did she give you her e-mail address? Or did you track it down? What did the e-mail say? What did she say that gave you the impression she misintrepreted it? I think if you look at all the components of what is going on here, you may realize on your own what you should do. As for advice or understanding, I think you're going to need to give a bit more details. You have "strong feelings" for this girl? And you asked why you can't get over her. Have you dated previously? You said from what she said, you think she misintrepreted the e-mail but then you said you are waiting for a response. I don't really understand.
  5. AwdreeHpburn
    dustin - First of all, let me say congratulations on your graduation! I'm sure your family is very proud of you. You are right to share your confusion and fear. Being nervous or scared IS totally normal, if that helps, but being "normal" doesn't necessarily make it better. But it will GET better. You are at a crossroads and things are going to change for you. I think it IS a bit scary but you should embrace it. Go with it and look forward to your future. As for your boyfriend, maybe he is saying things and being the way he is because he is confused and a bit nervous about the future as well. I hope this doesn't come off too corny, but I envy you, just starting your life, having Uni out of the way, embarking on the rest of your life. Best of luck to you and congratulations on your graduation! Good for you.
  6. AwdreeHpburn
    Shysoul - I think that was beautiful. Even in your poetry, your strength and positivity come out. You seem to me to have a wonderful view of the world and life, overcoming adversity, etc...spoken/written like someone who knows what they're talking about.
  7. AwdreeHpburn
    I think you should bite the bullet. If you like him and he likes you there is no reason for you to not be in a relationship. Just so you know, a friends w/ benefits arrangement is still a relationship. Its a relationship of convenience and mutual fondness. If there is no more than sex, moving on will mean nothing. If there are no other "friends" of this type in your life anyway, having a bit more of a commitment shouldn't change things too terribly either. What does "commitment" mean to you? What is if about it that you think you dont' have now that you fear? I'm curious because I think you'd be surprised that what a relationship is and what you have now don't have to be that different.
  8. AwdreeHpburn
    Dude, I strongly suggest you let her go. No matter the outcome. I know your instinct tells you to fight it and try to get her to stay but you need to loosen your grip. Even if you are really not controlling, she feels like you are. She's fighting for her independence and the tighter you hold on, the more she's gonna fight for it. Like the song says, "Hold on loosely, but don't let go, if you cling too tightly, you're gonna lose control" She needs her space and time and she's going to take it with or with out your permission. I think the best thing you can do is let her know you want her to come back. Tell her that if and when she's ready you are willing to work on whatever issues the marriage has to keep it together. I think it would do you and her some good if she feels like you support her need for space. If she is seeing someone else, you'll have to deal with that when you find out for sure. But for now, support her.
  9. AwdreeHpburn
    I think everything you're experiencing is perfectly normal, not neurotic. Keep up the NC. Don't call her, even to see how she's doing. Wanting to is normal, doing so will not be viewed as such and it WILL be a step backward. And stay away from baseball bats, fields and electricity.......
  10. AwdreeHpburn
    Pumpkin, I'm not sure what you need to hear right now because you already know what to do, the HOW has to come from you. I just wanted to tell you that I can I SUPER relate to this. I had a bf (a loooong time ago). We dated in a committed relationship for a very short time, the rest of the FIVE (5) YEARS we were only seeing each other, messing around, waiting until something better came along. It was totally addicting. We always saw other people and even got into relationships but always ended up back with each other some how. UNTIL something better and more permanent DID come along. I don't mean to be so not-helpful, I really don't know how you can break the cycle other than to just stop like you said, which, like you said, is easier said than done. But that IS one way. Most likely it will eventually stop when he or you get into a serious relationship unless you just decide to move on. It will just have to be a decision you make. I don't think you'll spend your whole life doing this. It will end. It just needs the decision to be made by one of you and the passage of time.
  11. AwdreeHpburn
    Dave I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I agree that maybe you should try things that take your mind of it and her. Get up, get out, do some stuff. As for feeling selfish, I tihnk it is the sign of a truly nice and good person that you are worried about someone else and don't want to be selfish. But being selfish sometimes is not only a good thing but very needed. Take this time to think about yourself and be a little selfish.
  12. AwdreeHpburn
    I agree with DN. Offer help if he needs it and then let him be. I don't think him not talking to you for a couple days means he's no longer interested. Don't overanalyze just yet. Give it a little more time.
  13. AwdreeHpburn
    Maybe she was unable to reply. Maybe she had her phone off. Maybe it ny wasn't charged. Maybe she didn't get it yet. There are so many reasons why she didn't respond to a txt. Give her a call.
  14. AwdreeHpburn
    I agree with Venus. Give her a call. She's probably waiting for you to call and saying the same things. "I thought he liked me. I thought we had a good time together. Why isn't he calling? Should I call him?" Sometimes girls think they have to wait for the guy to make the move having NO idea that he is just as tormented. Give her a call. Just to say, "hey." She'll probably be relieved that you did.
  15. AwdreeHpburn
    In my opinon, you should tell your parents as soon as you can. Ask for their patience and open mindedness and let them know that you know what you are doing is destructive and you want some help. Non-judgemental help.
  16. AwdreeHpburn
    What's the question? Why didn't he block you if he didn't ever want to talk to you again?? Maybe he didn't think it would be necessary. Maybe he didn't think of it at all.
  17. AwdreeHpburn
    Its so hard to say. Is this a casual sex, college type relationship? Do you want more from it? Sounds like you should figure out what you want from him and then don't ever be shy to get what you want or tell someone what you want from them. I agree with Keenan. Use that wording. "Being with you is really cool, I think we've got good chemistry, what do you think?"
  18. AwdreeHpburn
    Sort of. But you can do some active waiting. Call her. Just to see how she's doing. Ask her if her feet have been warmer. Just talk to her. Don't stalk her, but make yourself a semi-constant presense. If you wait too long, you'll give her the space and time she needs to forget about you. Just call her and say, "hi, how ya doin'?" You don't need a reason to call and not having one, other than that you wanted to say, "hi," can be kind of romantic.
  19. AwdreeHpburn
    5 - sounds to me like along with the horrible things your family experienced, getting into drugs, and the string of bad relationships have all added to the decline in your self image. I think before, you may have had a lot more confidence. A lot of times jealousy stems from insecurities. Maybe you don't think you are or can be everything he wants or needs. Maybe you think you're not as pretty as some of the girls he's looking at and are afraid he could easily leave you for someone better. I strongly suggest if you are still using drugs that you stop. I think you should talk to your boyfriend about the issues you are having with trust and insecurity. You may also consider talking to someone about the things that happened in your family. Those may be unresolved issues that will continue to corrupt other parts of your life and relationships.
  20. AwdreeHpburn
    Tod - I agree with Robo, I think you just need to give this more time. Pressure from family to date someone can be kind of weird and kind of a turn off. I think she is into you but sounds like she is just taking things r e a l l y s l o w l y. Just go with it. Go at her pace but like Robo said, be persistent. I think that steady persistance AND patience will pay off. Good luck dude. Keep us posted.
  21. AwdreeHpburn
    Dude, Caterina, you know in your heart of hearts that this is not a good influence in your life. He may be a good person deep down and he may be a good guy, "underneath it all" but is this the kind of relationship you want? One where you are just never sure? One where the love of your life makes you feel bad as often as he makes you feel good? Getting rid of a bad thing or even a not-so-good thing does not make you a bad person or a giver-upper. It means you know what you want from a partner and what you don't want. Take care of you, not him. If he's saying negative things now and you take it or let him because of his "potential," the potential for things to get worse is very high. Good luck sweety. I think you deserve better.
  22. AwdreeHpburn
    well, my last post came a day late... I type slow. GOOD FOR YOU ADIDEAS. And you've set a prescedent(sp?) for not getting walked on in the future! Congrats. And can I just say, my husband and I run a business currently, its his actually but I work my * * * off for it. I hope we don't have to do this for 20 years b4 the payoff!!
  23. AwdreeHpburn
    If your bf sees this as war make it clear that it is not. I agree completely with almost everyone here and NJRon said it best, business is business, period. My husband has hired, fired, documented against etc., a whole bunch of his friends, close ones, and family members. Its just business. Relationships outside of that arena are, or as my husband says should be, completely separate. You are not being selfish, distrusting or anything of that nature. As someone has already said, you're just being fair. And, like I'm sure your bf is, you've got you AND your son to think about. Good luck honey.
  24. AwdreeHpburn
    "100% of us die at some point." For now, just until they find the cure for death...
  25. AwdreeHpburn
    Ask YOUR friends what they think of him.
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