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AwdreeHpburn

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Everything posted by AwdreeHpburn

  1. AwdreeHpburn
    RC - that was beautiful! What you wrote a page or two back about sharing souls and air .....wow. Just catching up on this one Dako, you asked earlier if anyone experienced this 2nd wind. Can't say I have but its nice to hear its possible. I needed that right about now. I am sorry to have missed some of your more cynical times. I enjoy a good skeptic view point every now and again.
  2. AwdreeHpburn
    Are you on meds for OCD? You may want to find a professional to talk to about this. I really think you can get those feelings, ocds, and thoughts of having sex with strangers under control. I too am bored in my marriage right now and fantasize daily about sex with other people (mostly Brad Pitt) running off to an exciting life in Europe, etc (the long list of etc) but when it crosses over into and starts affecting reality, its time to end it or get help ending it.
  3. AwdreeHpburn
    Ok - so I'm totally lmao That joke just hit me as really funny. Maybe cuz I'm a visual thinker, or maybe I'm just dark.... Thanks for all the advice everybody. Jokes help too.
  4. AwdreeHpburn
    I think its totally normal after being in a long term relationship to be a bit disoriented, so to speak, back in the single world. It is difficult to know where to meet people. Fortunately we live in the comunication era/information age and so sharing ideas and finding information is a LOT easier. Do a google search - type something like - Singles in Arizona. I did, a ton of resources pop up. For meeting people on-line AND off. Just put yourself out there. Give a few things a try. Do those 3 minute dinner dating things ... there's sooo much out there that after a bit of good research, you should be able to find something that fits you. Good luck dude. - T
  5. AwdreeHpburn
    NJRon - what IS the moose?
  6. AwdreeHpburn
    Hey the door mat (How 'bout if I call you THE instead, I don't want to call you door mat) Hey The - good for you! You've made a HUGE step. Proving to yourself that even after he calls you, you can maintain NC is HUGE. I envy your strength. Telling US how hard it is and how much you miss him is what we're here for. Just tell US, and not him. Whatever you're doing, keep at it, it seems to be working. Something else that may help you, there are some people out here who could really benefit from your strength. I bet you could offer something that would help them as they approach DAY 2 of NC.
  7. AwdreeHpburn
    OHMIGOODNESS - She is very beautiful. Super congratulations. Good for you for sticking with the breastfeeding. Let me tell you as someone who breast fed three children, each for one year, it DOES get easier. The first one is always the most difficult and most women don't stick with it. If you can, great! If you don't, don't think twice about it. The fact that you made the comment about being the worst mother in the world makes you one of the best! Congratulations to you!
  8. AwdreeHpburn
    Wow. Well, I think if you have to ask if this new Jesika is a replacement for the old, the answer is yes. My suggestion to you is that you stay away from dating friends. Realizing that's the ideal but super tough, I say dating either will have the same result. It'll hurt their friendship and if its your first relationship in a while, could be a re-bound so may not be long lasting anyway... BUT it may be just what you need to get over ex-Jessica. Sheesh- that prolly didn't help at all! Maybe this is a "go-with-your-gut" type situation. Do what makes you happy.
  9. AwdreeHpburn
    Sorry Lil R. Bad timing maybe - but for the split is for the best? Just post when it gets hard. I'm sure they'll be people here to remind you that it gets easier. Sorry you're going through this. Stay strong!
  10. AwdreeHpburn
    I love the advice you gave so please don't take offense to this, but that's not what I want from a marriage. My husband is a very affectionate person and an excellent father. We have only been married since '98 so under ten years yet. I don't want my marriage to slip into complacency and to shrug it off as, "oh well, some people have it worse." I don't mean that in any way snotty to you, I'mm just saying that is what I fear is happening and I want to avoid it. I think I will talk to someone, and my husband, get some help and focus on turning this around. Thanks so much. That helped more than you know.
  11. AwdreeHpburn
    Bob Villa in kevlar - lol - nice image! Ahhhhh, I feel better about so much right now...
  12. AwdreeHpburn
    Seriously.... Ok - this thread is...interesting. To Brazilian wax or not to.... My goodness. I can't even imagine putting myself through that much pain. But it would HAVE to be because I wanted to. There's only one other person besides me who even sees that area and I'm sure he's just happy with THAT!
  13. AwdreeHpburn
    Oh - sorry, I didn't scroll down enough! Good for you! Keep us posted!!
  14. AwdreeHpburn
    Lost - that is funny. I laughed mao. I think you offered really good advice, the first time too. I don't know that the rules of the society in the UK are too terribly different Midgi, but it seems like either she is jealous of the attention you took away from her or she is threatened by your performance being recognized as better. Either way - you may need help from above. If management was there and witnessed her harassment of you and did nothing, that is not good. Sounds like a lot of people are intimidated by her. Someone has to put her in her place. In the US, we are not allowed to be drunk at work. Maybe she has issues with alcohol if she can't control what she says to people and "that's just how she talks when she's drunk." Maybe you can't SUE her per se, but you SHOULD be able to document her harassment, keep a log of it, gather witness "testimony" and tell your boss's, boss's boss. Someone somewhere will take you seriously and address her issues. They are hers - not yours.
  15. AwdreeHpburn
    That's not perverted! It's not even a fetish. It's a preference. Everybody has something that turns them on.
  16. AwdreeHpburn
    Sounds like the other "Fire" it created was worth a burned pair of panties! Maybe I'll try the fancy schmancy panties....
  17. AwdreeHpburn
    I wear granny pants most of the time. Well, I guess add "undesirable" to my list of attributes! kidding, I don't feel that bad about them. They're more comfortable and when the rare occasion arises for something more saucy, (I'm married so not often at all) I simply wear none.
  18. AwdreeHpburn
    why did that advice make me cry?
  19. AwdreeHpburn
    I know what you're saying about wanting to appear like you're fine without her as she appears fine without you. Just from what you've written... about her texting you, bringing up your move, thinking about you when she sees the shoes she knows you wanted...seems to me like she wants to remain friendly. You are probably someone she cares about as well, even if the "relationship" isn't what she wanted. I get the feeling you are not in a place where you can be friends right now though, and you shouldn't try. I think the appearance that you've moved on and are doing OK will show in the NC. good luck dude. If you need strength or a place to vent, this is it!
  20. AwdreeHpburn
    Seems like games are being played. Perhaps he just likes to be the one who says where the realtionship will be and doesn't want it coming from you. For instance, when you decide you are feeling warm and want him to know it by telling him you love him, he reverses it and makes you want to say F U. He's not going to let you dictate how things are going. And when you respond accordingly and tell him off or distance yourself, he's not going to have YOU making that decision, so he pulls you back. I agree with NJRon, sounds likes he's controlling. Even if he is unaware he is doing it or the reasons for his emotionally abusive behavior are unknown to him, his type isn't best suited for a relationship. Not saying he's a bad person, but it sounds like he has some things to deal with and he's really not good for someone else right now. I hope you can reach him and work things out.
  21. AwdreeHpburn
    I've been having problems lately with boredom and feeling like running away and just being mental...I fear the suffering my marriage is experiencing may be long lasting. I hope it won't, of course, but lately, I've been falling asleep on the sofa and my husband in bed. He comes straight home from work and goes right into the office (we run a business from home so he sort of HAS to) but he's there for the rest of the night. I'm with the kids during the day and all night until bed time. I rarely see him anymore. And when we do see each other, I am selfishly complaining about my depression or how horrible I have it! So after HIS long day and night, he gets to come play rescuer to me. Its getting old for me. I'm burned out. He's gotta be too. I know that this is the "thick" of it and things will change but its hard to see that far ahead. I'm afraid when we do get to the clearing, too much damage will be done. We have a vacation planned for the fall of this year. That seems sooooo far away. I know it will help, but are we even going to make it til then!? Thanks for any shared stories, insights or advice! -T
  22. AwdreeHpburn
    To test your strength and conviction. Those are great things to hear and she probably thinks she's doing you a favor. Sounds like she likes you and wants you to know it. Don't let it get to you. Stay your course. If you are doing well, keep doing what you're doing. I'm not intending to string a bunch of clichés here, but if it ain't broke...don't let a monkey wrench break it...
  23. AwdreeHpburn
    James, I gotta say, it is good to see another entry from you. I'm glad you're still here and are reading through the threads. I just think it worth saying to you, that there are people who can relate to you, who know exactly or as close to exactly as one can, how you are feeling. Sometimes, making a move into a hospital setting or treatment place, away from the family you feel so distanced from, can really help. If you're hanging on until your appt next week, I'm glad to hear it. I hope you'll check in with us periodically. I'm finding this website a great resource when I'm having a bad day. Hope to hear from you soon James!! -T
  24. AwdreeHpburn
    well....sheesh, i may not have insight or facts, but I feel like I was sort of saying the same thing...
  25. AwdreeHpburn
    That says a lot about the state of our society.
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