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renaissancewoman101 last won the day on February 24 2008

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About renaissancewoman101

  • Birthday 04/22/1973

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  1. Well, they got back to me. They want to do a lunch while they are out here. We will work out the plans closer to when they come out here. Thanks for the advice.
  2. Well so far I have not heard anything back. I’m not saying anything about this. I have noticed that he isn’t as friendly on the chat site to me, whereas before he would explain stuff if I asked, now he is kind of aloof and short. Just observing. Im letting this go and will not bring it up again. I could also be over analyzing this, so I will just step back and let it go and see what happens
  3. He is FB friends with me. I saw that he did read the message. I will let it be and see if he gets back to me. I am very thankful to them for taking me around and making me feel included
  4. Goddess, I sent the message about an hour ago via FB messenger. We'll see what happens.
  5. Sometimes I sound too eager to be friendly to people and that can be a turnoff.
  6. This does not have anything to do with the guy I like, but it does have something to do with the railfanning group I hang with. Today I posted on FB that I may go back out to MO to that little town to go trainwatching by myself in Jan or Feb. I love winter weather and miss seeing that, considering I live in CA. I had a good time out there and want to go train watch again, even by myself. I do know people who live there and probably can hang with people there. A few people gave me advice about when to do it and one of the guys posted that he and his wife were going to be passing through on their drive to CA. They live on the East Coast. They posted that winter train watching is cold but fun. This guy and his wife were really kind to me when I was out in this town since they were also there to train watch and they shuttled me around in their car. Since they were heading to CA, I IMd them about maybe meeting up with them to take them out dinner while they were in CA. I said Tim and I could take them out to dinner as a way to thank them for their kindness (I have told people on the railfan group and out there, that TIm and I are together). There's a long story about that. They haven't replied to me. Do you think I was too forward in asking to take them out to dinner? They had told me when I was out at the train thing that they were coming out to CA to visit some people who they know from the railfan group. I meant no harm by it.
  7. I think what I want in life right now is more friends. I know people like my personality. When I was at that train thing, I actually was able to chat with people and talk to people, and I still chat with them now. For the last few years, I've concentrated mostly on my personal life (trying to get my life together with money, working, taking care of my parents since they are getting old, and just isolating myself). I am very much an introvert. I haven't put myself out there to look for a guy in a few years because that tends to cause issues where I get attached too easily and it blows up in my face. I'm actually afraid to get involved in a relationship with anybody (hence why I try to push away my emotions), because of my fear of being hurt. I didn't go into this trip hoping to meet someone or anything of that nature, I actually was debating on cancelling the trip at the last minute because I wasn't sure how people would take me out there (since I am not white and I do have a type of disability that is noticeable). Tim actually convinced me to go since he said it would be good for me to broaden my horizons and travel like I used to do.
  8. I honestly am on the fencepost about this, so I may not do anything at all. Im not sure if I want to risk my emotions right now. Thanks all for your advice
  9. He didn't hurt my feelings on purpose. It was my fault for assuming stuff. I want that to be clear. I am NOT blaming him.
  10. Batya33, very true, I need to take responsibility for actions and decisions. As for the asking out, I know he is busy because he mentioned he was going on some work trips in the next few weeks and I don't want to ask to meet up on a weekend. I'd rather do an evening after work .I also have to move out by the end of this month (it's hard packing up an apartment you have lived in for over 10 years). I know Nov and Dec are busy months for people.
  11. I kinda decided to ask on here because after what I posted on here a few days ago, I wanted to make sure I didn't look stupid for asking him out for a cup of coffee. Thanks for your advice, I will keep it in mind.
  12. About a week ago, I posted about someone I had met up from a trip I had taken out to the East Coast. Since it was a small town and we came from the same city, he took me around and made things easier for me. I did develop some feelings for him and I asked if we could hang out again. His response was that we could meet up for coffee but he wasnt interested in a relationship or anything like that (he didn't say it that way, but I could get the gist of it). He told me to just text him so we can set it up in advance since he likes to plan things ahead of time. Since coming back, we see each other on the chat (actually its a youtube thing) site, and we do small chitchat. I also chat with other people on there so it doesn't matter. I did talk to my best friend Tim about this and asked him if he thought I could ask the guy out for coffee. Tim thinks it should be ok. Would you guys do it? We do have each other's contact number. If I do ask, it won't be for a few weeks since I am busy with work and moving.
  13. Btya33, I like the way you explain it. This sums up this whole situation in a neat and tidy way. I'm ok with it now. I stewed about it for a day and I'm letting it go. Normally, when I travel by myself, I keep to myself and I don't try to make friends on trips.
  14. I do have a close friend in my life right now (but there is NOTHING romantic between us), so even though we have that kind of close connection, I am lonely at times. Most times I let it be and deal with it. This time I was stupid and allowed myself to get attached to someone who paid attention to me and treated me well.
  15. I used to post on here a lot but haven't been in a long while. I haven't dated in years (don't want to deal with the emotional hassle that comes with it when things always end up blowing up in my face). Mostly just work, travel by myself, do things by myself, etc. Tim and I are still very close. We recently bought a house together (long story about that) because I'm to this point that, as I grow older, maybe having a close friend in my life (even though there will never be anything between us), is a good thing, especially since my health is not good. Had a few health scares recently. I don't really want to grow old alone. Other than that, I hang on a railfanning site to watch trains, chat with people, etc. I recently went out to a railfan event on the East Coast. One of the guys on the site who is also from my area was coming along. Got to hang with him on the trip. He took me around the city the event was at, we chatted, went out to lunch etc.. I'm mad at myself because just hanging out with him for a few days, got me attached to him. I guess I am really lonely. He's not interested in dating (that I do know). I did ask him if we could go out for a coffee when we are back in town. He seemed ok with that. We do have each other's numbers. I guess I am kicking myself for letting myself get attached to someone. I was actually scared to go out to the rail event mainly because I was going to be going to a very small town that was very conservative and white (and I am not white). He helped me to feel comfortable there. The people there were friendly to me so I had nothing to worry about, but with the political climate being what it is now, it is a valid worry. (PS: this is NOT a political post). Somtimes it is just better to close your heart and keep your guard up. I guess my question is how do I squash those stupid emotions of mine?
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