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bleeder

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Everything posted by bleeder

  1. bleeder
    Hi Trane, I agree with Fox here. You must ascertain your own objectives in relationships prior to engaging in one. It is a little strange to me that you "really like her but would like to know more girls". But I do believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. You might have said the wrong thing to her, but that can still be salvaged. Tell her how sorry you are and be sincere about it. Be patient and let her see your good side. All the best to you yah?
  2. bleeder
    Hi Silver, I understand your situation. What you can do is to be there for her now. In words, thoughts and actions. Do not try and wrestle her away from her boyfriend, coz that would only destroy your friendship with her. If she's meant to be yours, she will be someday. Be patient my friend.
  3. bleeder
    Hi, Yes I do agree with the post above. It takes a lot of courage for your husband to reveal the situation to you. That alone, speaks of his good intentions and his love for you. A coward would have just kept the truth from you. Learn to forgive him. Remembering that it was a DRUNKEN kiss, no ill intentions were made. I hope this incident might make you see your husband in a different light. A courageous one, that is.
  4. bleeder
    Sisterlynch, I like your new signature! Anyway, something similar happened with my ex eons ago. We were together for 2 years when she mentioned that 'we were not right for each other'. Duh...how does one respond to that? What you need to do is : move on. I do not believe in making someone like you. Even if they did in the end, you cannot be sure if it's due to true love, or some form of sympathy or gratitude because of the efforts that you put in. Get back on your feet and savour life. She's not worth your time anymore. Someone out there more worthy is though.
  5. bleeder
    Hi Inanna, I am sorry to hear that. What you need to do is to talk to her. Make her see that life is all about overcoming setbacks and learning from it. One failure does not spell the end of our lives. Try to occupy her time with pleasant things. A walk in the park, do some window shopping, bring her for coffee at some nice cafe...etc. Try to get her out of the house. Being alone at home might induce her to become more depressed. If that's not possible, use the phone. You may want to approach a counsellor, with your friend's approval of course. Be there for her yah? Keep us posted.
  6. bleeder
    Hi Jujigatame, Good thread! I agree with what you have mentioned. It is best for one to post his advice as much as the situation would allow. No use in dishing out advice coated with sugar and spice, only to cause the poor person to end up with despair and a sense of false hope. I give out advice here base on my own yardstick on how relationships should or shouldn't be. Some might agree, some might not. That's why it is best to have a forum like this, where one can obtain not just one, but varied views given from different angles.
  7. bleeder

    Last Day

    bleeder replied to prelude93's topic in Dating Advice

    Hi Prelude, Yes that what's you should do. Go all out with all guns blazing! Hope to hear the good news from you soon. Remember, be cool and try to see her as you would a normal friend. Good luck dude!
  8. bleeder

    Am i jealous

    bleeder replied to amijealous's topic in Jealousy

    Hi Amijealous, What you are feeling is pretty normal to me. Speak to her and let her know of what you are feeling. If she is sensitive and considerate enough, she would stop all her "public display" of affection. Do let her know gently though, no point in getting worked up over this. Best of luck!
  9. bleeder
    Hi Beg227, First and foremost, you need to identify the fact that relationships are not a plaything. Lying and being unfaithful should NOT be in the works. This goes for you and him. If you recognise these, understand that it takes trust, faith and effort to make a relationship work. With the underlying factor being LOVE. Throw your undesirable attitudes away and resurrect yourself to a new life. Not only will he see it, you will feel much happier and better about yourself too. Be faithful, be understanding, be strong and be loving. That will pave the way to better days ahead. Good luck.
  10. bleeder
    Hmm, actually there is some sense in what New York wrote. Girls would only notice and desire a guy when he stands his own ground. Even if he likes her, she would normally tend to reciprocate only when she senses his independence and a good mind of his own. Though I have been through the dating game, I was never one who gave in to a woman just because I like her. Compromise yes, but not if her wishes are against my principles. Saying NO is not difficult when you stand by what you value in life.
  11. bleeder
    Yupz, ditto to the 2 good posts made. Diggy, what matters most now, other than your feelings for her, is the amount of responsibility you are willing to shoulder. Humans do come with emotional baggage, but fathering someone else's kids is a different matter altogether. If you think you cannot live up to that, then please do let her know early. It will only break her heart if you were to stall this. Follow your heart, but do listen to logic and your mind too. Take some time to think about this. All the best to you.
  12. bleeder
    Hi Jessica, The old rock band Cinderella used to have a ballad called "Don't Know What You've Got Till It's Gone". This is just so very true of the human psyche. When we give our best, our time and efforts to someone, most of the time it is gonna go uncherished or untreasured. We can't really pin the blame on anyone or anything, but when it comes to love.... we have to recognise the efforts our partners are giving. That is mandatory. In your case, he is clearly not doing so. I have done all I could for my marriage, yet it still fell apart. Why? Plainly because I cannot sustain it alone. I have an ex-wife with a totally different objective and direction in life. Our family and home is not in her list. We, those who are in relationships, will come to a point deciding that enough is enough. We cannot go on living based on someone else's dictation of what we should do. Sisters are standing up for themselves? Keep that in mind.
  13. bleeder
    Hi Enchanter, May I know what is the reason for your breakup? What you are going through now is nothing strange. But remember, what matters most is your own well being and your future. Knowing full well that he is not the right guy for you is the first step. It is hard to detach yourself from a relationship once it ends, but we've got to bite the bullet and get on with our life. As much as love is still in the mix, try to focus on the negative aspects which caused the rift in the first place. I am not encouraging negativity, but I am just trying to make you see the possible short comings if you were to get back together with him. No sense in wasting your efforts in a relationship that will head nowhere in the end. Hope that I have helped.
  14. bleeder
    Hi JustinLovesMary, I can understand what you are going through. It is tough when the ghosts of yesterday cannot be put to rest. When it comes to your partner's history, I believe in one thing, that is, whether you accept it OR you don't. If you find that it is troubling you, then end the relationship. No matter how hard you convince yourself that you are be able to look past her history, it would still find ways to return to your mind. To haunt and trouble you. Everyone has their own principles and philosophies on life. What we should do and what we should not. When those boundaries are broken, it is not easy to convince ourselves that everything is alright. Think about it.
  15. bleeder
    Hi Sarah, Ditch him. He's not worth it in the end. It is quite obvious really. It will be hard to leave him initially, but you have to consider your own well being first. Keep us updated.
  16. bleeder
    Hi Dazed, I am a Catholic, but I have been studying Buddhism through out my life. It is good to see that you have an interest in this, as Buddhism does teach one a lot about life and its frailties. Here is a link to some pages which are very informative for a new comer to Buddhism. Learn to grasp the Four Noble Truths first, then proceed from there. Happy learning!
  17. bleeder
    Well, don't even THINK about it. To you, she should be what she is. Just a neighbour. Relationships with a married woman is definitely unwise.
  18. bleeder
    Oh no, suicide is not going to be on your list my friend. I do agree with you in that everyone needs their own space. Sorry for saying this, but I am sad that you boyfriend cannot see this point of view. Couples can blossom together, but we only flourish best when we have our own time and thoughts in perspective. You will have to make your stand here. Let him know that you DO value your time alone, or with your own friends. Life is not just about 'couple time'. Let him know that when you folks are not spending time together, does not mean that you do not love him or think of him. This is all part and parcel of relationships. Be strong.
  19. bleeder
    Hi Jess, What you are going through sounds normal to me. It is alright to pine for your loved one when he's not around. Are you sure that the emotion you are feeling is jealousy, and not disappointment since you cannot spend time together? If it IS jealousy, learn to be more trusting of your partner. Relationships cannot proceed smoothly when trust is not in the works. Be confident of yourself. Place some faith in him too. Remember, prolonged jealousy can lead to paranoia. THAT...is not a road you want to head down. Be cool!
  20. bleeder
    Hi Stargazer, Tell me about it! Women seem to have this knack for cancelling appointments at the last minute. I can't seem to find any answers...maybe the gals here might give us a hand? Anyway, try to be patient with her. Perhaps she is going through this "playing hard to get" stage. If she keeps doing it constantly, then tell her that it is not very nice of her to do that and RESPECT is part and parcel of a relationship. Ending with the words of Ali....'float like a butterfly and sting like a bee'. Cheers!
  21. bleeder
    Hi Chelsea, It seems to me like something is troubling him. Try taking some time to speak to him about it. He may be evasive at first, so don't push too hard. Be patient. I believe in time he will tell you what is bugging him. You could also take this opportunity to find out what are your goals percieved in this relationship. It is best to be heading in the same direction yah? Best of luck!
  22. bleeder
    Hmm..nice question Santa. For me, I believe in going through a variety of relationships before ever settling down with that special someone. Why? Because it opens up our eyes to the downsides of BGR, the pitfalls we'd know better to avoid when we are older and wiser. I have been through 2 serious relationships before settling down... and I still made the wrong choice! Life is all about living and learning. I still am. That's my 2 cents dude.
  23. bleeder
    Hi NFGFAN, Mermayd gave some pretty good advice there. But my views do differ a little. She is ultimately your friend's EX. Their past should be over and done with by now. What you can do is to sound him out. Let him know that you are interested in this girl. If I am in his shoes, I would not mind at all. Unless, he still harbours some feelings for this girl. That's why I think it is wise to converse with him first. Be brave. Go out and get what you deserve. Good luck!
  24. bleeder
    That's a great site Alien777! Nice post. I thought that the tests were pretty accurate too. Cheers.
  25. bleeder
    Oh man...that is disgusting! Sorry, but I was a little taken a back with her "hygiene problem". Please tell her that no man can "perform" well when the sewer is located right at her lower quarters. Of course, try and tell her tactfully. If she is not willing to "clean up", then I'd advice you to stay away from her. That is one BIG turn off dude. Tk care.
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