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bleeder

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Everything posted by bleeder

  1. bleeder
    Hi Melly, Honestly, I don't believe that long distance relationships can survive the barrage of distance and doubts. For this to work, you might have to make a choice of going over to join him or vice versa. I am not advocating for you to abandon all that you have and to follow him abroad,but truth is...that is the only for this relationship to blossom. If you decide that going over is not a wise choice, then it is wiser to end it here and now. More pain for now, but less hurt in the long run. All the best.
  2. bleeder
    Hi Snowy, What you are facing here is just a temporary phase. Don't be too alarmed yah? Your disappointment in men have made you digusted with the thought of sexual acts with them, but I believe, this is just for now. It may also be hard for you to picture yourself making out with guys again, because you have been scarred and broken. All these takes time to heal. Do not worry yourself too much. It will be wrong to commit yourself to female relationships sexually as ultimately that is not what you are. Be yourself, and be patient.
  3. bleeder
    It's tough dude...I know what you are going through. My advice is just to hang in there for awhile and to see how things go. She might or might not return to you. If she does, do have a good talk with her, ensure that she is totally over this guy. It is dangerous to venture into a relationship when one still have hangups about the past. All the best Readyman. I hope things will work out for you in a bright way.
  4. bleeder
    Hi Diverp, BGRs would be much simpler if we all could close those chapters of the past and move on with our lives. This is something which I have been striving to achieve. Past relationships should not be brought to the light of the present. This is just my personal opinion yah? What is gone, should be left as history. Admitted that feelings might still be inherent in some form, but we cannot really move on with our lives if those strings are somewhat attached. Firstly, it is hard on yourself, and worse off, even more unfair to your future partner. Hang ups like these are best avoided. I cannot tell you not to feel for your ex, but if you are really serious about your new partner, maybe it's time to break those chains. Let's live our lives looking ahead and never looking back. All the best...
  5. bleeder
    Hi Reborn, The answers to your questions are quite simply found. You know that a relationship is over,when your character and your principles in life are compromised. As a couple, you would have to work towards enhancing your lives together, whilst ensuring that you both grow in the same direction. It will never work out if one party is merely using the other as a stepping stone, either for solace or comfort. All in all, stick to your guns. Keep your feet firmly planted where they should be. Breakups may hurt badly in the beginning, but when you realise how she or he is unworthy of you, it makes it all the more easier. Have faith in yourself, for whether we are alone or not, what matters is that YOU, never put yourself down. Hope that I have helped.
  6. bleeder
    Hi Lance, I feel that in order to win her back again, you might need to do a little soul searching first. Time to look within yourself. Firstly, do not venture into having sex with anyone else when your relationship is hanging in the balance. That is not too wise. Sex cannot resolve anything yah? Secondly, if she is someone you really care about, then make her your priority in your life. Make that extra effort to care for her, to travel that extra mile. Relationships do not flourish based on lip service. Try to understand how she felt when you dealt her that death blow. It is not too late to make some amendments,just be sure that you are sincere. Bring her out for a nice dinner and talk about things. Things that matter between the both of you. Most importantly, let her know how serious you are with her. Of course...make sure you mean them. Good luck Lance!
  7. bleeder
    Hi, For those of you who think that life is over, and everything is bleak...think again. Goodbye to the faithless, the heartless, the loveless, the truthless...the darkness. I drew a lot of inspiration from this song by Bon Jovi. I hope that you will too. It's time to live our lives...everyday. BON JOVI LYRICS Everyday I used to be the kind of guy Who'd never let you look inside I'd smile when I was crying I had nothing but a life to lose Thought I had a lot to proof In my life, there's no denying Goodbye to all my yesterdays Goodbye, so long, I'm on my way I've had enough of cryin' Bleedin', sweatin', dyin' Hear me when I say Gonna live my life everyday I'm gonna touch the sky And I spread these wings and fly I ain't here to play I'm gonna live my life everyday Strange, everybody's feeling strange Never gonna be the same Makes you wonder how the world keeps turning Life, learning how to live my life Learning how to pick my fights Take my shots while I'm still burning Goodbye to all those rainy nights Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on I've had enough of cryin' Bleedin', sweatin', dyin' Hear me when I say Gonna live my life everyday I'm gonna touch the sky And I spread these wings and fly I ain't here to play I'm gonna live my life everyday There ain't nothing gonna get in my way Everyday Goodbye, so long, I'm moving on I've had enough of cryin' Bleedin', sweatin', dyin' Hear me when I say Gonna live my life everyday I'm gonna touch the sky And I spread these wings and fly I ain't here to play I'm gonna live my life everyday I, oh I, oh I, I'm gonna live my life everyday I (gonna touch the sky), oh I (spread these wings and fly), oh I I'm gonna live my life everyday
  8. bleeder
    Princess, Personally, I have been through that darkness and have came out of it unscathed. You can do so too. First, there IS a solution to any trouble in the world. Ending your life is a problem, not the answer. Secondly, there is no easy way out of depression. You would have to face your issues head on. Calm yourself down and spend some time thinking about what is REALLY troubling you. When one is down and blue, many small issues seem to take on a bigger significance. Once identified, start asking yourself as to how you would want to deal with it. Face the main problems first. Don't pay attention to the nagging components which don't matter. At the same time, keep yourself occupied. The best way of fighting depression is to keep fit and excercise. When one is physically healthy, the mind would follow suit. This is a general advice to all those out there who are contemplating suicide. Life is all about learning and overcoming our odds. Never give up and never surrender. There is a pot of dreams waiting for us at the rainbow's end. Take care all.
  9. bleeder
    Well, when situations like these happens, CLOSURE is very important. You cannot leave a relationship when no proper answers are given. You may get over it after awhile, then again, this issue will return to haunt you after some time. You will wonder about many things, of which the biggest thorn would be "why did it happen?". To prevent any long term worry or damage to your emotional health, seek him/her out and thrash things out. Talk it out. The relationship may be over, but at least...let it end with both parties having a clear idea of the recent proceedings. All the best and be strong.
  10. bleeder
    A soulmate...that is someone not easy to find. But how do we know when we have met the soulmate of our lives? I cannot give any concrete advice, but there are some traits which you can look out for. For example, someone who is able to connect with you at a deeper level. A person that goes beyond the issues of sex and love. Not to discount love and sex at all, but a soulmate is able to be your friend, a listener and someone who knows you inside out. Communication is important in every relationship, with a soulmate, you will find it easier to relate and to talk to. Ever noticed that there are some people whom you cannot confide or even talk with? Soulmates transcends all of these. I wish you well in your search!
  11. bleeder
    Stay cool dude. What's important for you is to find that inner confidence in yourself first. That's the first step you gotta take. You cannot make someone like you ...unless you like yourself. When you are good and ready, go out there and socialise. You might not get to meet Britney...but u might meet someone who's richer in the heart and love one day. Good luck!
  12. bleeder
    I do agree to what you have mentioned Jenny. Porn can be viewed as an outlet for some. It is closely tied to the male's psyche I guess. It can't be that detrimental, as long as porn is not abused or carried too far. Cheers all.
  13. bleeder
    Hi Kali, It seems like your relationship has been broken even before you had a chance to build up a strong foundation. My advice is, since the both of you have come to such a state, it is best now for you two to take some time apart. Use this time to reaccess your goals and objectives in life and your relationships. It is also hard for him to work things out with you as he is now seeing someone else. If possible, try to forget about this and move on. In life, we have to learn from our mistakes and try to make the best of it. Attempting to salvage something like this is difficult. Besides, the emotional damage has been done in some way... lift your head up and walk on. Remember that in future, it is not very wise to tell your partner that "they should meet more people" when you are in a relationship. It makes them insecure and paranoid in some ways. Tk care.
  14. bleeder
    Hi Mermayd, Happiness derived when one is in a high state, is transient and meaningless. You see a different form of reality, one which is totally untrue. One with no basis or foundation. Mermayd, alcohol and drugs are not a solution to anything. Neither do they bring you closer to finding your own self. Strive to keep a clean and sober mind. It is only when our minds are clear that we are able to see and think with clarity. That so called "happiness" you experience when you are intoxicated is momentarary. It's a fake oasis in this desert of yours. I hope that you can try your best to keep clear of these intoxicants. May you find the light at the end of the tunnel someday Mermayd. Tk care.
  15. bleeder

    Hey all

    bleeder replied to Co2's topic in Dating Advice

    Thanks CO2! I am sorry I have never heard of that song. Remember...Goo Goo Dolls rock.
  16. bleeder
    Hi Saku, Don't worry too much about it. I just hope that you were tactful with your words in the note you gave to her. Keep us posted abt the details. All the best!
  17. bleeder
    Hi WhyMe, My heart goes out to you. You sound very much like the way Bleeder was about 16 years ago. I have progressed through the different stages of solitude. At first, I found myself alone, filled with ideas about the world no one could conform to. Everything else was just bleeding around me. I was in despair and I did not know how to proceed with life. After some hard knocks in life, I slowly understood certain things. I found out that no one else in this world is gonna try to make you happy 24/7. No one is gonna be there for you if you fall. One person you can only rely on is YOURSELF. Yes, that good ol' you which no one can touch. So I brushed up on my self esteem and confidence. I swallowed bitter pills only to reap a bigger harvest in the end. Today, I am alone again. But not an unhappy one. I want to show the world what this Bleeder is capable of.....I ain't no put me down. You can learn to be strong too, WhyMe. Do not worry about dying unloved. Keep on loving with your heart, although many a times it is not reciprocrated the way we want it to be. I will leave you with these words I came up with years ago.... "In Life We Love, In Love We Live" Be strong now.
  18. bleeder
    Hey that's a good move, Tears of A Dragon! I do admire and respect people who stand up for themselves. That's the way it ought to be. I am happy to know that you are able to recognise when the relationship should end. We do not need to be hostile, but being firm is the key word here. All the best to your future relationships.
  19. bleeder
    Hi, She (your ex) seems a little confused to me. A good talk with her is necessary. Follow your heart on this one. It's not so much an issue of whether you will meet anyone new now, but whether you still feel for your ex. We cannot move on with our lives if there's emotional baggage still in play. Besides, having a new relationship now would only serve to cause more damage for your new partner. Be wise, and listen to that beating heart of yours. Never forsake someone who is truly worthy of your love. Flip side of the coin is, if you cannot reconcile with your ex then do move on yah? Do not hesitate too much. Hope that I have helped.
  20. bleeder
    Hi Waterlily, I am sad to hear about this. Here's what you can do. Tell your friend that whatever negative things which could happen in her home, they are not her fault. Make her see that she is young and has a full life ahead of her. Life is short and we should make the best of it. Live it as a happy soul or an unhappy one, the choice is up to us. No one can make that decision on our behalf. I have been through that stage where I thought I was "unconsciously happy being sad". After some time, with lots of courage and inner strength, I realised that I cannot go on living like this. I have emerged as a confident soul. Your friend can do it too. If possible, see if she can stay with you for awhile. Get her away from parents who only serve to be negative influences on their children. I do hope that all goes well. Keep us posted.
  21. bleeder
    Hi Virgo, Yes, 4 years is a long time. When it comes to dating and expressing emotions, I am one who tell it like it is. I do not really like beating around the bush about it. Of course, I won't just blurt out everything straight into her face. I will only let her know if I sense that she is showing some positivity, that the relationship can progress to another level. What you can do is to sound her out. If you are afraid of the repercussions, drop some hints first. Or ask her stuff like "What do you think of our friendship?". Keep it open ended. Let her speak. You might be surprised at what you might find. Good luck dude!
  22. bleeder
    Hi Mike, A few rules to follow: 1. Approach her only when she is alone. Talking to her with her friends around might arouse some teasing, something you don't want as yet. 2. Study her mood before doing so. If she is sulking, or her face is blacker than the Vader's toosh, then refrain from making your move. 3. Make sure u are looking presentable that day. If you look like a bus just ran over you and your hair is in a mess, make the necessary amendments. Hope that I have helped. Key ingredient required here : CONFIDENCE. Chill.
  23. bleeder
    Celeste, I am with these guys here, regarding opinion. Casual sex to me has never been the right thing to do. The post effects of guilt and trauma is not worth those hours of pleasure. It's worse if you are married or attached. What you can do is to curb those urges. Think twice before you let lust or passion overwhelm you. We are constantly barraged with a million things in our daily lives. It's how we discipline ourselves that's important. Be cool and take out your sexual passions on your husband instead. Create some new 'bedroom stories'. I am sure he will be more than happy....
  24. bleeder
    Although many have proclaimed "I Love You Forever", it is not really so. In this harsh world we live in, forever is a luxury which seldom happens. Relationships are not really built to be 'forever', as with most things in our lifetime. When we chance upon an intimate relationship, we can only hope and pray that our partners share the same intensity and fidelity which we cherish. We cannot dictate another person's mind or his/her behaviour. We should learn to love without regrets, to love without demand. How our partner reacts or manages the relationship... is really left to them. It's not a curse, Tears of A Dragon. But a weakness in the strength of the human mind. Let's all hope for a better world and stronger faith in relationships.
  25. bleeder
    Hi Mermayd, I am sad to hear that you had such a history. Anyway, on the issue of your boyfriend ; I do understand how he is feeling. As much as he cares for you, he is also afraid that knowing too much of these negative truths might be a mental stigma to him. It hurts to know of the suffering your loved one has gone through. Not to mention the anger, the pain and the sadness that comes with it. There is always a debate on the issue if skeletons in the closet should be left as they are, or should past histories be torn out into the open. My personal belief is that the past SHOULD stay as history. Let it go. We can build a better today with a new hope of tomorrow. We cannot progress much when we've got our heads looking back at what isn't there anymore. Mermayd, I know that you have gone through much. But maybe you should not enforce too much unto your bf. What matters is how much you both develop your relationship now. Be strong.
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