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I wouldn't worry about it. Vaginas come in many sizes and shapes. You'll find your "match".

You've got your head on straight and your a leader. Applause.

I'm an engineer who wants to become more of a businessman. I plan to go back for a Bachelor's in Management. The problem is that my company does not offer tuition re-imbursement. It's a $15,000 tab to finish school. I probably make too much to qualify for financial aid, (I make 90k and have no debt). Any ideas on how to get this schooling paid for if my employer won't do it?!!!

It's been about 6 years now of always feeling dreadfull optimism. I am very optimistic about lifes possibilities, but I always feel as if a big crane is about to come down and grab my head. What do you think that means? I've felt like this ever since I was about 28 years old. When I was 28, I walked away from a crowd of drinking buddies and a casual lifestyle for a more corporate life making a lot more money but finding office politics to rule the day. I have no idea why it is I feel a tidal wave coming. But I do feel it.

The satisfaction you get 10, 20, 30 years from now will be much greater than jumping ship for a new woman. My parents have been married 50 years. There were years that they could not stand one another and many years they considered divorce. My dad recently told me that they are like newlyweds again. The satisfaction they have from sticking it out is much greater than the rewards would have been had they chosen to break up. Work on making your heart strong, not on a new woman.

Just got a call from a girl that I was "set up" to meet by my hairdresser. I asked her out for dinner tonight.. but she called 1.5 hours before the dinner to say she was "tied up" at work, but gave no specifics. Okay ladies.. I know it MAY mean she really was tied up, but let's cut to the chase. What do you think? Do you think she bailed out of the date or do you think she really had work. I was really looking forward to the date and I know there was NOTHING at work that would have had me miss this date. So, I don't understand why someone else would bail on it unless they weren't as excited about it.

I can remember making love to a woman who used many types of vibrators. She was so use to that amazing sensation of a vibrator, that she admitted a man's penis just didn't make her cum anymore. So, we pulled out the vibrator and finished what we started. Her body was "numb" to regular penile pleasure on the clitoris and she needed a toy to get off. I never used any type of toy because of that. Think about the possible reprocussions of using a toy. What happens if the toy you use gives MUCH more pleasure than any woman's vagina? What happens if a woman's vagina just doesn't make you cum because the toy felt so much better? That could be a real problem. I suggest imagining different women or girls during masterbation. Imagine different positions and move into different positions. Keep it human. In my mind, masterbation simply holds you over until you find the woman you love and can make love to.

A guy's opinion: In answer to: 1. Do you think she's just using me for the sex? Yes. That is what defines your relationship. If your relationship is defined by love or caring, she would not continue to date someone. In answer to: 2. Do you think she might eventually want to be with me? 3. She says she's still in love with her ex. Will that go away by itself or does she have to make a conscious effort to turn off those feelings? Because she thinks she can't be in love with two people at the same time, so until she's over her, I'm basically screwed. I don't buy this one. There is no limitation on "love". The problem with this whole scenario is that there are not any borders. She has sex with 2 people and she confesses her love for only 1. That is INCREDIBLY SELFISH! If a guy did this, would he not be considered a scumbag? What do you hope to get from this relationship anyway? Do you see this as a possible longterm relationship that may lead to marriage or lifelong companionship? I think you have to go into a relationship with a goal in mind. If there are not any boundries, goals, or borders, then things get very confusing. What is it that you want beyond just her love?

I came to the conclusion, about 3 years ago, that if the mind can conceive it, it can be done. I'm a philosopher by nature, not by schooling. Anyway.. I went from a $33k per year job for a small bank in Milwaukee to a $90k job per year in Chicago at the Sears Tower. I passed an engineering exam that only 9,000 people in the world have passed even though I've didn't go to college for engineering. I am dating women from around the country and even the world now (nice dating, not sleazy). To make a long story short, I believed there is no limitation on the mind and that you have to BE something before you ARE it. In other words, your current state of mind IS your future. So, when my girl dumped me and I had a crap job with a bad apartment, I just believed in myself.. I just believed I was an engineer for a global company making good money, living a great life.. THEN IT HAPPENED! passing the engineering exam was something I could not comprehend. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? EVERYONE SAID I COULD NOT DO IT... BUT I JUST KEPT STUDYING.. EVEN ENGINEERS WITH MASTERS DEGREES GIVE UP ON IT... BUT I DID IT. My theory: I believe that the government and the inner circle (CEO's, CFO's, most from Ivy League or East Coast old money etc..) don't want American kids to have this knowledge because it threatens there power. For example: Why don't they teach UNLIMITED POTENTIONAL 101 IN HIGH SCHOOL? WHY DON'T THEY TEACH finance 101 in high school?!! Sometimes I think I'm crazy, but if I think it, I swear, I've been doing it. If I said I wanted to be president, I really think I could climb into the SWARMY D.C. political scene and get elected as a senator for my home state and then become prez someday. I don't want to do this.. but my point is.. if you want to be the most difficult idea in your head.. you can do it easier than you think... it's only difficult because you don't know how to do it.... yet. Have I cracked the code or am I dilusional?! I've also noted that since I joined this 3 days ago, I've posted over 100 times giving advice. Is my brain in overdrive?!!!

well.. words mean nothing... the problem with any language is that it cannot capture truth in a word. So, forget the WORDS... look at the person.

Thanks for your responses. You are right about one thing.. I move quick ... too quick like a "whirlwind". I'm always pushing forward because I like to control things after a broken heart a few years back. Time for me to just mellow out and allow those "signs" to appear instead of blowing by them. Thank you.

Got it. Thanks for clarifying. Well, I broke up with my girlfriend a 3 years back after she broke my heart real bad with many lies after we fell in love. I got out of the funk by applying the following motto: "I realise now that I can't control the person I love. The only thing I can control in this world is myself. So, if every day, I try to make myself better. No matter how bad things get, I can ONLY control my actions and attitude." I suggest trying to imagine yourself a year from now and what you want to be like. Then, every day, work on yourself to get there. By realizing what we cannot control we become enlightened to our true potential and we become a beacon attracting others.

Get her on her own and simply tell her what you are thinking. She's not engaged or anything. Just go an tell her what you feel. That's the simple solution.

It's really not that big of a deal. It's kinda cute because the girl mentioned it to you. That means she kinda wants it to come true. Don't worry about it... it's really not that big of a deal. If you show them it bothers you, then they really will have fun with it.

Time for you to create a huge goal and go for it. Anything to get your mind off of her. If there is any hope of getting her back, showing her you can do fine without her is the best chance you have anyway so you need to move on. You MUST press on and focus on your future. You will NOT be able to rationalize your way out of hurt. You must refocus your energy into your future.

Until you meet, I would just take is very slowly. You don't need to rush or push. If it is meant to be, it will work out without a lot of effort. Just be yourself. My suggestion is just to tell her you enjoy talking with her and look forward to meeting her. You mentioned "love".. but really, you need to meet her before you declare that don't you? You may "love" the idea of her but you haven't really seen her bad moods, how she interacts with others, bad habits, etc.. "Love" is the full package.

Is there ONE person in your family you can talk to? If so, that's what I would do. Then, this person could explain your situation with the family as well as you.

I've always found that I gain confidence when I learn and master something. Like my latest engineering exam. I passed the lab which took 3 years to prep for. I feel great. I would have to disagree somewhat with your all-in-one answer about self-esteem though. If someone is confused and hurt by someone it PROBABLY IS NOT because of low self-esteem. It's probably because they have a good heart and they want love to work. Just because you have high self-esteem does not mean you are not capable of getting your heart broken. Sooner or later, high self-esteem or not, you will have to lay your heart on the line. If someone steps on your heart, it hurts... bad.

Paleez, In my life I've been skinny, fat, confident, and insecure, acne-laden, muscular, dorky, and witty. I've always had opportunities for dates at each phase. They key is to get out in the world and not hide in a hole. If you can do that, you'll meet your girl.

Well, as an ex-military, single, 34-year old male I feel okay telling you this: She's a girl. You are an experienced man of the world. She's going to place you in a very important position that you should not take advantage of. I would use that position to assist her in finding her footing in the world not for anything more than friendship. Yep, you could go for it and probably date her and maybe get serious, but is that what is really best for her? I don't think so. You're not in your 20's anymore. One of your new roles in your 30's is to show the youth the best way to live. I don't think a 18 year old girl dating a 33 year old is a good way to live. It would be different if she were 22 or 23 with SOME life experience. But she's just a kid. When I was 27, I dated a 19 year old college student. She was a great girl who wanted to continue it but I knew in my heart what I was doing was not right. This girl was still trying to figure out who she was. She looked up to me and I'm glad I didn't take advantage of that.

My sister basically left her husband because he was a bum and she didn't love him. She had two kids. She regrets it to this day that she didn't work with him on their relationship. She's alone with 2 kids now living on food stamps, 45 years old, without much hope for those greener pastures she was looking for. I think the problem is the relationship, not your husband. There is someone out there who thinks your husband is perfect the way he is, so the problem isn't the husband, it's how you see him. I strongly suggest working on the relationship. The grass is usually made greener by personal changes on your side of the fence, not hopping over it. It's easy for me to say all of this, I'm a single male, I can't comprehend what you are going through but that's how I see it.

First off.. a 29 year old guy who plans on buying a home with college buddies is no where near ready to settle down. Sounds like he has a different goal than you. It's not a waste of 1.5 years. It has helped shape and define what you want out of life. You now are in a position to move on with someone who is in-line with your goals. The fact is, if you leave this guy for the new guy, you MAY be unhappy. It IS possible that the new guy will turn out to have bigger issues. But, you know this, there are no garuntees in life. It all comes back to you. Decide what you want, then don't look back.

You have certain standards of courtesy that I don't think are unreasonable. I admit, I probably would do many of the things this guy does simply out of habit, but if my girlfriend said to me, "You need to call me.. or you need to open up to me." I would try to do that out of respect. If he's not even trying, what does that tell you about him? His behavior needs to change to your reasonable requests. If you don't think he is capable of that, he's not the guy for you.

You're obviously a sensitive person.. but she knows that.. and it sounds like she is using that against you. You've made up your mind. Stand up for yourself. The best thing you can do is say the truth. You would be HURTING her if you told her anything other than the truth. Tell her you don't want to keep in contact because you need to move on. Just being friends doesn't work for now.. you need to give it at least a year so you both can move on.

Just remember.. there is no such thing as an "average" penis. Some women like them thick, some don't... just depends on the woman.