smiles314

Hey, im curious to know how long you were doing the NC rule for?? Since the March?

Okay... well since me and my ex bf left college to go to our separate homes for the summer i stopped all contact with him, basically just blocked him from iming me online because he was never a phone person to begin with. TOmorrow will be 5 weeks since our last conversation, and he hasn't attempted to contact me. Is it more likely your ex won't contact you if they have some other girl wanting them, making them feel good, and giving them sexual pleasure...Does that pretty much sidetrack the guy, or give him less motive to contacting you, especially if you both aren't in the same town. It feels good not talking to him, but every so often you just wonder....

Hey, im not a guy..but when i read your post I just wanted to reply immediately... My ex bf did the same thing to me, we ended up sleeping together...I had the same hope, and 2 years later-- He ended up stringing me along with all those hopeful sweet talking words, and we just kept having sex. He swore he wasn't using me, but nothing ever progressed- he gave me more just kept saying he needs more time. And where am i at now? Well I got beat...he ended up finding some new fling after a whole 2 yrs, and dropped me for a few weeks...Then i just told him to hit the road..and we havent spoken in weeks. Im not saying that your ex will do this to you, i'm just saying be cautious with sex and ex's.. It got me into an awful situation that i'm still trying to heal from.. So pleaseee just be careful, don't want anybody to end up feeling the way i did.

Hey! Ur post rocked.. IM doing no contact for 4 weeks on Wednesday...And wow, does it feel strange.. BUt after so many manipulations witt his guy I know I'm better off.. And I know what you mean about ur ex being stubborn because sooo is mine.. ALways has to look liek the winner, even if he is just tricking himself.. And nevr lets himself be vulnerable. But reading your post helps a lot, and feel free to pm if you ever need or want to talk.. I know some days can be annoyting, while for the most part it feels great.

OK, im not sure i get something.. im 21 yrs old... and i just asked my other 21 yr old friend whos a guy, and taken if he has any guy friends for me to meet ..And he said, " why?" so I said, to help a girl out, and he said "I'll help you out plenty.." so I said help me find a guy, and he just said, "for what".. and then he said "why do you want ag uy to hook up with.." I kno this conversation is a little stupid.. BUt i dont get it. i'm just a little confused here.. do guys not enjoy introducing their guys friends to another girl? Or is there something else I am missing here?

hey.. my ex did something similiar that yours is doing, but I think he just wanted to feel like he had control of my feelings, and wanted to be wanted. He ended up finding someone else, after throwing me mixed signals for 2 yrs, then dropped me for a week then proceeded to try to hurt me after. I kno this is not about me, but my point is just to not get caught up in all he is saying, actions truly do speak so much louder and it took me so long to realize that. Protect yourself, and i'd say ignore your ex, or tell him to stop or be serious. Just don't get caught in that web,,, I did, and I just wouldnt want you to get as hurt as I had. These guys need to step up or get lost in my opinion.

Hey.. well on friday my dad checked into the hospital, the psychiatric floor... After more than a year of arguing and convincing he finally went.. Great that he is getting help with his illness (which nobody is sure about yet)... but its hard when I just spoke to him for the first time today.. mY relationship with my dad hasn't been great to say the least in the past 2 years..he has wronged me in many many ways and my mom. On the phone just a few minutes ago, he has said more to me than he has in the whole year, literally. But he sounds soo drugged up, slurring his words and stuff and I just hate that. I hate how the answers to someones behavior is more drugs. Its hard for me to accept the fact that someone can only be nice to you, if they have a certain mixture of drugs in them.. I hate seeing my dad like this, hearing him like this.. I know the scientific answer behind all this, I know what it does to the body.. Just seems so unnatural. And I was so sad hearing him describe the place, hearing the intercom on the background. The floor is gated off, he can't live.. He can't breathe in the fresh air, that seems horrible to me. They don't alllow him to wear his belt, have a cell phone charger, all those precautions. I don't really know why I'm posting, I just feel sooo mixed up.. THis is kinda all surreal to me.. I came home from college 3 weeks ago, not expecting to walk into this situation. THis is just so crazy, something you see in the movies not in your own real life.

OK... this is it. I am swearing off guys for awhile because I am so sick of the ones I talk to just caring about getting sex. It seems like every 21 yr old guy just wants to get in your pants!! Even when they will talk to you and have casual conversations with you, it all leads up to them just wanting to get in your pants. I am done for awhile!! I just don't know what else to do...

Hey... I have the option of switching from birth control pills to the birth control patch. HAs anybody tried the patch? For the patch users, do you find it to be easy or hard? Any side effects or downsides I should no about before I make my decision? If anyone has experience with the patch i'd be very grateful to hear your opinons... Thanks

Hey , i dont have the answers you are looking for but I do have a very similiar story.. My ex became a constant pot smoker at our university and acted the same way with me that you are describing.... If you like to talk about this feel free to PM me, and I can share my experience with you ..sometimes that helps knowing you aren't alone

I am 21..And still to this day i feel like nobody is really my "true" friend and nobody really will do anything for me unless there is something in it for them.. I know what it is like to be 16...and it is some rough times. You feel alone, and let down. But you will grow up and mature and see that people around you are different...and trust me, you are going to want to live to see 21 and 31 and 41... Maybe it doesn't seem like it to you, but there is someone out there who admires you and cares about you and wants you safe... I truly believe that everyone has someone like this. I hope i'm making some sense right now. ... But don't you ever just wana see how your life turns out in the end? Where you are going to be in 20 years? what you are going to end up doing ? Aren't you curious to see where it goes...you may meet many amazing people in a fwe years.. I really think you should give it time...And i kno teen years can suck so if you ever want an older experienced friend ..i love listening ....so please Pm and lemme kno if you wana talk.... ---life can be preety incredible if you let it...

I know I have posted before about this situation briefly. And I know that everyone's relationship with their ex's is different and nobody is the same. BUt I really want anyone who will listen to learn from my dumb mistakes and avoid the pain I now suffer from. I so desperately thought I could fix what had went on between me and my ex over 2 yrs ago. To me, our relationship was perfect and there was no problems so there was no reason it should have ended. I stayed in this horrible emotional rollercoaster with my ex for the proceeding 2 yrs thinking if I went along with his wishes, and formed a type of no committed relationship he wanted then eventually things would smooth out and we'd be back together. He said the things he knew I wanted to hear to get me to stay when I'd slip away. He said he still cared, he still thought about me and still missed me and he just needed time...and then after time came he said he just couldn't be in a relationship because he just couldnt think about anybody else except himself... etc. I really feel like he maniuplated this whole thing just so he could get sex outa the deal, and i complied like a naive girl thinking that if i went along, things we be different.. I never voiced my opinion, I always held back and never really showed him who i am.. ...and 2 years later, he hurt me in the most unforgettable way...He slept with me and had said that there was nobody else he was with many times previously...and then 3 days later just suddenly stopped talking to me after these years have passed...and didnt say anything to me only to let me read these away messages that said he was spending nights with someone, and these messages pointed to him having sex with another girl...he couldnt even tell me this himself when i tried to speak to him..just cold and distant.. Never before did it happen but it ffinally hit me how I allowed myself to be used, allowed my body to be used, and threw my self on the path of destruction.. What did i do!!? i thought.. i gave him whatver I had and he hurt in me in such a way.... A way that was so blatant and on purpose.. to actually make it a point to tell me that he has more fun with this girl, and says you agree we should have moved on along time ago right? So he droped me like a hot potato as soon as he found someone knew...He probably does everything for this girl that he said he "Couldnt" do for me... MEanwhile here I am, feeling like a real dumbie..and they are spending a weekend together. SO please....be careful when dealing with your ex.. Protect yourself and respect yourself.....Don't let the situation you are in get like this....I don't want anybody to be in this kind of pain, and feel this rejected and hurt like i do!! Be smart .. And by the way...this ex was my first sex partner and my only partner so that made it hurt a lot more!

you are right... and don't get me wrong please, i do take some responsibility for this and I am feeling stupid that I did what I did. But it was in this emotionally abusive relationship i guess, and he would just say all the words that he knows get to me...and i know i let them get to me... but now i just feel the hurt and regretfulness, and i just can't believe how he really just didn't want to do anything for me, and would do it for someone else.. Realizing that is the hardest part.

So after being led on by my ex bf for the past 2 yrs...being led under false pretenses that there was still hope for us.. Giving him his way, having sex with him under his terms for the psat 2 yrs. He has finally dropped me because he found someone else who lives in the town we go to school in. And you know what, everything he wouldn't do for me and said he couldn't for the past 2 yrs since we officially broke up, he does and will do for this girl. I can't believe that in the end, he got everything. Everything he wanted, and i'm here where I have caused more damage to myself then i can repair. Why did he do this? I certainly missed out on saving my dignity...please nobody do the same... Respect yourself, don't give in to any of ur ex's.

Hey all... I'm starting to get really annoyed with this guy I met in school this year. We barely knew each other, and started talking online and that turned into a lot of talking for a long period of time.. And we'd talk about a lot of personal stuff together, and both talked about our own relationship problems. I thought we were building a good friendship. But now what it looks like was that he just was using me while he was having relationship problems with his gf back home. Because we are now home for the summer and he seems to really not care about talking whatsoever- and him and his girl are together and happy for once. I'm just kinda ticked about that because I feel used and real stupid for listening to him for so long, trying to help him.. I'm so sick of getting dropped so much..!! --sincerely, FeD up!!

Hey QT.... Well what I was going to do for someone but ended before I could do it..was perform a strip tease for his birthday.,.. This could be very sexual and kinky if done right..... You can put on some fishnet stockings and your high heels and put ur hair up in a hat and have some sexy outfit on ...and sexy lingerie underneath,, and just walk in normally kiss him hello, turn on the radio and go for it, and be aggressive!!!..... This is just my idea....may not be for you. But thought I'd lay it out here

Hey guys.. Don't really know what to do or say here.. I just know i need someone to talk to.. My dad has been acting mentally unstable for the past 2 years...He just isn't the same person anymore.. He yells at my mom and I..Almost every night my parents get into fights. He forgets things a lot teh next day (or acts like he does).. He has been caught smoking pot int he past, and taking tranquilizers and such like that... He and I barely speak anymore.. So tonight my mom had it, and called teh cops (they have been called before).. They came, spoke to me, my dad and my mom... So my dad put on this act, like he was a real nice normal father.. he ended up going to a hospital and agreeing to get evaluated tonight. Now i'm freaked, scared, and don't know what to do.. And i'm scared how he is going to act when he gets back.. Can anyone talk? Im a little confused...

So, after my ex played with me for about 2 years after the break up...gpretty much keeping me on a string...going back and forth, saying i miss you, i don't want a relationship, i want to be with you, i dont want to be with you...etc. (and basically all we did ended with us fooling around).. i finally felt enough courage to break away from him after the last situation he pulled on me (see previous posts for more info).. I haven't initiated any conversations with him since the last weekend of April.. And he has tried to talk to me online twice, and i was cold, and abrupt with him..very different from what I usually am, and this struck him in a weird way. Well I'm at home now for the summer, so I don't even see him around since we just go to college together...and the last few weeks I was feeling like I could care less to hear what he has to say, and I don't even care to check to see if he is online anymore...But just today I started to think about him and miss him, or just think everything through in my head..Its funny how I realize that he is very inconsiderate and selfish when it comes to me, and pretty much has always been...But part of me still has him in my heart..And its kinda annoying that the feeling never goes away..or at least hasn't yet in all this time. He was my first and only sex partner, I was wondering if that's why I have thes lingering feelings for him. Could this be the reason? I don't why it won't go away, but its rather annoying... ---Twisted

Yes..I definitely think that you should have absolutely no contact with you ex in this situation. Trust me, I know it is so hard to do, and feel so wrong in your heart but ultimately it will give you the most closure and satisfaction in the end. I have just finally gained the courage to do this and it feels great!! And ya know, he imed me after a week of me completely ignoring him.... And he came to me all worried that I had someone else...and it felt great not even caring about anything he was saying.. So please do this for you, no contact with this ex, and if you need some support I'd be glad to help because I know its hardest to do such a thing when you feel alone... Hope this help you..

WOw....thanks you...That was truly the best advice I have received yet, but I do appreciate everyone else's input of course. I just think everything you said in your reply to my post was so right on. And I am happy to say that I did not play those games, and I just let things go because I finally realized how stupid I was to settle for something so much less then what I really wanted. AndI believe I was never in love with him, just in love with love. But I am glad that summer is here and its pretty much a guaranteee I will not see this guy or talk to him for a least 3 months. And I'm sure he will make some contact with me again, but all those feelings I once had are pretty much gone so I think it all ended up working out for the bestt... Just hoping I find a summer romance ....But I know looking for one is not the answer. At any rate, thanks so much for taking the time out to read this.. !! --- LL

HEy... well look at my last post about my ex for my details.. BUt basically the short version is that he and I had this weird non-relationship , relationship where we were physical, talked a lot and just hang out with no true commitment yet it always happens in college for the past 2 yrs.. BAsically a few weeks ago, it was apparent to me that he had someone else..whether he was just using her to be physical or liked her, i did not know..but i knew there was someone new. So he dropped me for a week, was cold to me and barely spoke to me... So when he imed me online a week later I was cold to him, and said that i thought it was funny he thinks im going to talk to him...and he replied that he didnt care, and that i looked funny (he is 21 btw) and that was it.. So today, a week later from that, he ims me Hey..... he asks me the usual how r u , wats up question... And tomorrow I am leaving college to go home for the summer. So I was very brief with him, but answered. Then out of nowhere, he says... "i guess that you foudn someone to occupy you time and have no concern for me anymore..." so i asked him what he was talking about and he said ..."you found someone esle and dont care to talk to me anymore"...and i said u jump to conclusions, u were a jerk to me and I don't talk to jerks... so he says "how?" then says "whatver i don't care." So i say, you got someone....and he says "yea i do and i have more fun with her then i did with you..moved on" and he continues to say "u agree that we should have moved on a long time ago right..?" so i said - why are you telling me this... and he said "i didnt want to.. i just wanted to im you to say have a good summer." so i just said alright, you as well.." and then he just said later.... SO this conversation to me was totallly weird, unnessary, and contradictory... Any insight as to what the heck he is trying to do? Thankkss..

OKay guys... My ex bf and i have had this weird relationship for the past 8 mos or so, seeing each other once a week, and ending up sleeping together and fooling around..we go to college together. He imed me almost every day and we'd talk for a while.. Last week i spill my feelings about things to him, and he listens looking sweet as ever. He wanted to see me that night, we hung out..slept together. Things seemed to be more comfortable and better than before. We spoke for a few days after, and then didn't talk for about 5 days for no apparent reason..hes away message had said,,,what a night...so I thought something was going on because he never imed which was totally unusual. I imed him, i asked him if he was mad or avoiding me for some reason. He said I just have been busy...Then i asked him what he did the night before...he said just work... THen i said i missed him...and he said i bet you do...its been a few days- and then i said i have this weird feeling you dont want to see me and he said i do i just have been busy with school work and work... so i just said okay ill let you go... Well that night I saw his away message say ...someone kept me up late last night getting some much needed sleep... then a few days later he was gone all night...and his message said.. now thats how you spend a night with an angel face.... SO basically, it seems that he found someone new...and he totally dropped me and hasn't spoken to me at all.. So i have been so upset so angry and so hurt because i feel everyone moment i have ever spent with him meant nothing to him, he never cared he just wanted sex from me...and whatever i thought about him was completely wrong.. And i know anything I say to him now won't make a difference to him, i can't hurt him if he has someone else...Schools over in 10 days but im just so incredible angry and feel so betrayed... I don't even know what I should do... Scum huh? ---too nice too naive..

Hey guys. Its been awhile since i've posted on here. BUt I'm back again about the same probelms as before, my exboyfriend. And this time especially, a guy's input would be greatly appreciate among any of you women who also may have something to say. To really know my history with my ex, feel free to read my previous posts. But for a brief update, over 2 yrs ago my ex and i dated for only about 6 mos when we were 18. We met in college, and pretty much fall for each other pretty fastl During the summer, we lived over 3 hrs from each other and things didn't work out so well. I would nag him a lot about the things he was doing, and he couldn't take having to answer to me i guess, so he broke it off. Mind you, I didn't ask for much but he really couldnt handle putting forth extra effort i guess. So throughout the last 2 yrs after our break up we talk online a lot and see each other everytime we are in school together. I had tried to avoid him but he just never wants to leave my life, he always finds away to be in it i guess. So i go tmyself into this probably really dumb situation with him. Whenever we see each other, that look in his eyes is still there and i feel likehe still feels something. We just hang out in his apartment, watch tv, eat, talk. But the majority of the night is all physical. He says that he is just really attracted to me, and i do agree we have great chemistry. But its gotten to the point where we kiss hello, hang out together for a few hours and then end up fooling around and having sex. We have see each other about once a week, sometimess less. At school, he doesn't fool around with anyone else which i honestly believe is true because he's always forward with me. The problem is that i'm in a bind. Ialways try to avoid talking to him but after awhile i just start to miss him and i end up talking and he ends up convincing me to come over and we do the same thing every time we are together- have sex. I still believe that i have a piece ofhis heart and that he still does care for me and has feelings for me. He talks to me online a lot and stuff, and he still supposedly thinks about me. But ofcourse i tell him i want more than this and i dont liek the way it feels to be with him for only physical stuff. And he always says the same things, that he is too busy with work in school, work at a parttime job, smoking pot, and that stuff to be able to give me what i want. He says he feels bad always telling me that but he just can't do it.. And basically i protest that i can't be with him anymore, he says the same usual excuses back to me and we start this whole cycle all over again. I know i part to blame for this situation.. But if its been 2 yrs like this, is it right to think that he is never going to be able to give me what i want? I feel like he never really loved me, he just wants to have sex with me but i hope thats not true. He hates when i say that to him because he insists its more than that. But shouldn't he give me some of what i want? I mean take me out sometimes, just do more with me? So does anybody have advice about this guy? A way to maybe get what i want from him, I was wondering if theres something that would make a guy jump to you. I feel like if he knews i was happy with someone else he'd be crushed...But i also feel like he doesn't let much bother him, and hes good and hiding things up. So i guess its the question of just cutting all contact even though the thought of that hurts so much since we have become really close over the last 2 yrs.. or is there something else i should do? Schools over in 4 weeks...so i probably wont see him for 3 months ....is this guy really using me?

OK so my ex bf and I, good friend still how talk a lot together, and are together on and off. WEll we were talking for a few hours online today...and he was saying a lot of sweet things. How he had this dream about us, and how he wanted to buy me something nice for christmas bc i mean something to him. And how he wants to seem during our break off from school, and that he misses me. Well here i am thinking wow he seems to really care about me and seems like hes really changing and really wants to be iwth me. Well the he wants to play this random game because he can't sleep. So he wants to take turns asking random questions. I asked him , who is the prettiest girl you have ever kissed? ANd he replies, this random hook out a party before we started going out, someone he doesn't even know but when he was "ontop of his game." So i reply, i thought i was the prettiest girl. And he replies, the prettiest girl i know the name of. Just something abotu what he said brought tears to my eyes and just really hurt me. I know i am not hte prettiest girl out there. Don't get me wrong. But he always said that I was the hottest girl he has ever been with me, and I always thought in his eyes I was #1. To hear that, and to hear the way he phrased it just kinda gave me this new light to how he views me in his life.. I feel awful now.. LIke whtver I thought isn't true. Just because he thinks some random hook up with a girl he doesn't know, is something so much mroe important..or he really considers a random girl the prettiest girl he kissed.. I'm just really upset about it.. I dunt know if I should tell him, let it go.l. if i'm overreacted or if it means something..I am just so hurt bc for the first time in 3 yrs he said something like this... Help anyone?

Hey, I recently took an IQ test and received a score of 127. I was wondering if anybody knew how a score like that ranges with the rest of them. If anybody knows about IQ tests please feel me in on how good a score of 127 is. Thank You.