The Morrigan

There's a strong chance as the investigation goes on these tapes will be seized as evidence. Since you already know they exist, best bet is probably to ask for legal advice. I'm figuring you're not going to be able to get the tapes yourself, since they are evidence, but since you're a minor, the court could probably be closed (legal and involved members only) so they don't become public knowledge. Ask a legal advisor who you should go to to make sure it's requested before hearings start.

Beec has the right of it - you're going to run into him, so just make sure you're casually friendly, but don't accord him extra attention, or do anything that shows you wearing your heart on your sleeve. He says "Hi" when you're talking to other people? Say Hi back... and continue talking to the people you're already talking to. Think of it as a way to get used to dealing with your jealousy issues as well - the more you work on being that comfortably casual and friendly person, the more natural it's going to be for you to act that way without having to think about it.

For most people - trying to go to "just friends" when you're on the receiving end of the "dumping" is nothing more than an invitation to torture. You get just enough to hang on to, the talking, casual contact - but at the same time have to watch and deal with your ex living a life you're not the same part of, even to possibly talking about their new romantic interests. Make no mistake - every word and every indication you get from your ex while you're trying to be the big person and be there as a friend that shows clearly that things are not what they once were will be like rubbing salt on an open wound. Until you honestly FEEL like a friend, it will only serve as a reminder of what you once had - and now don't. Nobody puts a band aid on a cut and rips it off every few hours to tear open the scab to feel just how much it hurt the first time - and yet, that's what you end up opening yourself up for. There's also the fact that none of us are perfect at hiding our feelings - and as your misery spills over, not only will it make you an unattractive person to consider for a relationship, it will make your ex lean away from you as a friend. This is the time you really need to put yourself first and do what's best for you as far as being able to be a whole person within yourself again, and that doesn't include clinging to bits and pieces of someone who, at least for now, is NOT as emotionally invested in you as you are in them. Yes, acknowledging that hurts. Hell, it hurts a LOT. But constant reminders of it aren't going to make you feel any better. And contact that is only for the purpose of hanging on to a little bit of what you really want is going to hold you down like an anchor. Somewhere under the misery of losing your ex is the person your ex was initially attracted to - a whole person, probably with a good bit more confidence than you're feeling right now. Try to keep in mind that person is still there - it's just going to take a lot of digging deep into yourself to bring them out again and take charge of your own life, and then decide where you want to go from there.

Fleeting attraction, and occasional twinge, is relatively normal, and passes quickly or should. I'd have to say any feelings that bring up serious consideration of cheating (any cheating, not just sex) or exploring the other person as an "option" are a problem - because at that point you're questioning not only the strength of the attraction to the other person - but to your bf/gf who you're in a relationship with. Anything beyond what would normally exist between friends is NOT ok. Excessive flirting, touching, etc is leading behaviour - and really, if you're feeling out someone else's reactions to you to this extent, it can be a sign you really shouldn't be in a committed relationship to anyone, you're simply not ready to fix your affections on one person. That's ok - as long as you're honest about that and stay clear of a committment where your intentions don't match your partner's.

Well, you can start giving solid hints when you know the chemistry isn't there, like "Wow, you remind me so much of my friend's brother, he was just like a brother to me as well, and we're still good friends today." Ok, maybe not that blunt lol, but even "I wish more of my guy friends were as easy to talk to as you are" starts to get the general impression accross that it's not romance that's in the air for you.

I've always tried to be upfront as soon as it came up to avoid any "leading on" and still allow the possibility for friendship if the guy was willing, just basically "I really enjoy your company, but I honestly feel I'd enjoy you as a friend instead of a romantic interest, and don't want to lead you to think otherwise. If you're interested in hanging out as friends, feel free to call me, but I'll understand if you don't feel comfortable with that." Most of my guy friends have said what they hate more than anything is being led on to believe their interest is returned when it's not - so I've always tried to be upfront about my feelings and intentions. If there's a better way, I'd sure like to hear it!

Being sick and/or stressed can throw your cycle off - but you're late enough to take a pregnancy test to give you a better idea (and maybe some peace of mind). Have you had any other symptoms (very sore breasts is one of the first typical ones, not nausea generally), or is it just the lateness that has you concerned? If you do take a test, make sure you do it first thing on waking up since that's the most concentrated your urine is and will give you the most accurate result.

The odds are you won't be pregnant this time - though the average "most fertile" days tend to be between day 11 and 15 of your cycle, or about 4 days to a week following the end of your period. If you plan on using this or the rhythm method after you're married - I'd suggest getting an ovulation thermometer and chart and get a good idea of what your cycle is now so you'll have a few months pattern and some practice, as it'll also help if you decide there's a time you most want to get pregnant, as well as avoid your most fertile days or take extra precautions when you'd rather wait. Even done right, it's only about 85% effective, since sperm can be hardy little suckers and survive a few days, but if you really want to stick to strictly natural control, start getting informed about the cycle your body runs now, and comfortable with keeping track, since everyone is a little different.

Don't worry about the "cum," that seems to be more the exception than the rule as far as a gush of fluid. But you will have vey intense spasms/contractions in your muscles in your vagina, kind of rhythmic, not controllable, for up to maybe 30 seconds or so. It sounds like you're "on the brink" so to speak but not quite having a full orgasm just yet, you're going through the buildup tingles and feeling of needing to pee, and then the almost "push" so you're very close. Believe me, when you get there there won't be any doubt of what it is! Don't stress it, it'll happen!

I had a similar problem as a child - I was gamma globulin deficient and almost constantly had chronic bronchitis and pneumonia since I had next to no immune system. The treatment in my case was a few months of a series of gamma globulin injections - not pleasant exactly, but it did take care of the deficiency permanently. The only other time I've had really low resistance was following a bout with mono - took almost a year to get normal immune system back. But apart from that, that was the total of the treatment, and no related problems since.

link removed and link removed Those should give you a nice start on some basics. Also try link removed for some examples to help you along. I know, it's a lot of reading!!!

It really depends on both of you - whatever you're at ease with is normal. What is normal for you could seem too much to someone else, but a lot of people are very open to having small day to day conflicts and clearing the air and resolving them as part of the dynamic of their relationship. Personally, I tend to worry more when there's no arguing, since it tends to let issues build up into huge problems because both parties are too afraid of conflict to bring them into the open and come to a resolution. Being able to argue and spat and still know the foundation of the relationship is strong is part of being able to trust the other person enough to let them see when you're angry without fear - as long as it's not causing problems or becoming an issue where you can't talk without arguing, or one person storms off and nothing ever gets resolved but gets worse, sounds normal to me

I also have more guy friends than girl friends. Best thing IMO is to be open about it with him, and when you can, leave the door open for him to come along if you're having a drink out with your friends so he can see the difference between the way you talk to and interact with them and the way you are with him. It always looks worse if you try to keep something even somewhat hidden, regardless of the reason, it leads to doubt and questioning. He might feel a little insecure at first - but the more open you are to him asking about your friends and to talking about it, the more easily he should be able to see you have nothing to hide.

link removed start here - it's the EEOC you'll have to get in touch with to file charges, because unless I miss my guess, this is going to be considered sexual harassment, with the implication your potential job and position in the company was riding on it. This is pretty blatant - and these people are well used to handling sexual misconduct and harassment issues, I'd talk to them first and see what advice they have to offer.

No, you can't start the new one unless you got your period a week early when you stopped taking the pills, most you can skip and double to compensate is a day - if you try now you'll short yourself for this pack. And definitely play it safe and use an alternate method of protection if you have sex, both before your period, and for a few days after you start your new pack, much better to be safe than take chances with it!

I do mine sometimes - and don't think of it as any different than getting something new to wear, sometimes it just FEELS good to do something a little different for yourself. Especially if you're getting over or getting past something, just depends on each person what makes them feel like they've done something nice for themselves I suppose

I would have to say this is where your knowledge of her can stand you in good stead. You know some of her likes and dislikes, what she sees as attractive in the flirting and dating scheme of things. What would surprise her and make her think - and what would come over as "typical." Being surprised, pleasantly, is one of the things that leads to anticipation and attraction. Mix things up a little, throw in fun curveballs to keep things exciting and fresh - so she sees maybe she doesn't know everything about you just yet. If you want to send flowers - try a new twist on an old theme, if she'd expect roses, think about either a flower that reminds you of her, and send that with a nice note saying why (example, bright daisies with a note "you always bring a smile to my day, I hope these bright and cheerful daisies bring one to yours since they reminded me of you"), or even something like a flowering bonsai with a note or a poem about admiring the person she has become. Think creative, and don't flood her - allow enough time for things to stand out and make the little "fun" things dominate, little flirty surprises. I know it doesn't sound as romantic - but too steady a diet of romance kills attraction, there's not as much room for flirty play.

I know we already discussed this privately, but I figure it's worth reiterating I'd save it as an olive branch/trump card in the event she tries to make totally unreasonable demands - ie, you're willing to get past this and not pursue it at all if she will also act in a mature and civil manner to come to the easiest resolution possible, and easiest one for the children. Show good faith on your part that you have no desire to air any grievances per se - and will only do so if you have no alternative, if she tries to turn it into an all out war. Not so much to use it as a threat - but as a demonstration on your part that you DON'T want to make it into a battle and would far prefer mediating a fair and equitable arrangement for both of you. If you have records of it happening before - just keep a record of then and this time as well. Sometimes the best position of strength is having something you could use and choosing not to in the best interests of the parties involved. Make your position on wanting a mature agreement your first priority perfectly clear - it's much more difficult for the other person to start the battle cry against "unfairness" or being "out to get them" when you're offering concessions from the start.

I hate to say it, but this one looks like trouble. She may be mature in some ways and share some interests - but the hard fact is, she's still got what, 3 years or high school left while you're a working adult. You are and will be essentially living in two completely different worlds, one where you won't fit in with her friends, and she won't get much in the way of respect from yours. While it's not as big an issue when you're older, or one is on the verge of moving into the other's "world," 6 years is a LOT when she's just entering high school. And yes, you have the underage problem as well, anyone who feels she's being taken advantage of can report you - it doesn't even have to be a parent. You have 2 years before she OR her parents can legally permit you to have any kind of physical involvement, the law doesn't care what she thinks, you think, or her parents think. Be content to be her friend and maybe an older mentor who shares her interests - and keep the freedom for both of you to move in your own circles without feeling stigmatized or restricted. If you're still friends and end up wanting more in 3 or 4 years - then would be the time to reevaluate the situation, but for now, let her grow with her friends at her own pace.

As everyone has said - "No Contact" is NOT supposed to be a weapon for the person doing the dumping to make sure their now-ex gets trampled even further than they already are - but for the party on the receiving end to NOT have to suffer a multiple series of rejections and rub more salt in already raw and fresh wounds. And to get back a little self respect and dignity - and space to heal from being dumped. Unfortunately, it seems some of the "dumpers" see this as an easy out to avoid an awkward conversation - when it would at the least be courteous to give some sort of explanation. It's the polar opposite of the "let's be friends" that also doesn't appreciate the needs of the person being left. Either one can be justified as "making it easier" on the person being left - and both generally do just the opposite. The last thing a person who has just been summarily given the good old heave out the door needs is repeated gems like "I said it was done! *click*" "God just leave me alone!" "I'm beginning to depise you!" or details of how much of a "loser" they are. It's simply avoiding putting yourself in a position to receive multiple kicks when you're already down. I also agree if you HAVE been in contact - you tell the other party "let's be friends" isn't a possibility at the time, and "hey, I know you wanted to stay friends, but I haven't adjusted or healed enough for this, please give me space because I'm getting mixed signals here, if all you want is to be friends, I'm simply not able to do that yet, it still hurts me, and I can't keep in touch with you until I get back on my feet." Comes down to being forthright and honest, and making it clear it's not being vindictive, but being realistic. And not the least - having enough self esteem and care for yourself to say "this is what I need." Even exes who don't go to the extremes yours did to avoid giving any explanations or sense of closure to the "why?!?!?!" question rarely manage to offer anything to their ex that really makes sense or gives any real understanding. Oh, sometimes the explanation might make some kind of sense as to what the problem was - but rarely does it give any kind of insight on why it was enough to break the relationship over. Most breakups don't come about as a result of one major event that both sides see easily as a "reason" for the breakup. Rather, the best explanation I can offer is there are little things that give one party a growing sense of "wrongness" about the relationship, or a growing sense of doubt of being in the relationship. They might question and wonder for weeks or months before making the break - and rarely talk to the other party about it, so it's a complete shock to the person on the receiving end. Most people don't look forward to hurting someone they've been with for a while - and won't actually break up until they hit a 'breaking point" that the other party much of the time is COMPLETELY unaware of. They've had those weeks - you haven't. They might be ready to be friends - you're not. And most of the time, closure will not end up coming from anything your ex says, though it can at least help - but from knowing often there's nothing you could have done when someone wasn't honest enough to communicate when they first started feeling there were problems and giving you a chance to work through it. There's simply not a whole lot you can do to solve a problem if you don't even know it exists.

Talk to him as well for certain - a lot of guys will try to hold back to make it last longer thinking it's doing you a favor - if it's going on TOO long suggest more play and shorter intercourse, ask him if there's anything that pleases him faster - turn it into exploration. Talking about it will help the emotional connection as well and lead to more intimate conversations where you can open up to each other on other subjects more easily, and develop more of a connection.

Right now you're the "other man," and she has no reason to break up with her bf because, well, she's already GOT both of you while she makes up her mind. The incentive to actually make a choice just went to approximately zero from her point of view - neither of you are going anywhere, she has ALL the time in the world to decide if she wants to commit to either of you. She stabbed him? Umm - this isnt normal, even between couples who fight. And make no mistake, if you do end up with her, you'll have arguments, it's part of the normal dynamics in a relationship. On top of her being with another guy - it sounds like she has some serious anger and control issues. While it might seem like her ripping up pics and numbers of other girls now is an ego boost, because it makes you feel how much she wants you - think VERY carefully about how this works in real life in a relationship, because face it, we go to school, work, etc where there are people of the opposite sex, and nobody should be in a position where they're constantly defending themselves against someone else's insecurities. Just something to really think about here - your emotions are making you see things differently, and you want to give her the benefit of the doubt - but do you really want to be in her bf's shoes getting stabbed if you happen to TALK to another girl innocently or something? Get assigned a girl as a lab partner? Please, be VERY careful here, this is something that can get out of control VERY easily!

Honey, you said it yourself, she's turned you down. She won't call or respond to emails, and she's said no when you've asked her out. You're not doing yourself any favors continuing to pursue her when there's other girls who are interested in you. You don't have to go out looking for a relationship - but hey, I'd at least go out with some of those other girls, have a good time, and then see what you think. There's also this - you'll look more attractive in her eyes and the eyes of others if you're getting out there and having a good time, and your company is in demand, instead of pining over one girl who isn't responding to you. Spend some of this time and effort on girls who WILL appreciate it instead of one who isn't, you never know who might end up making you think twice about if she's really worth all this trouble and wasted effort, and you can't meet more people if you're spending your time on her!

How would he feel about it if she DID like him? If there's no real interest on his side - there's really not a problem, since she'll move on once she sees her interest beyond friendship isn't being returned. Maybe you should talk to your friend some more and tell him what you're worried about - it might help if he could give you some assurance that no matter what, he considers you his friend and isn't going to change that for a girl. Any girl can change the dynamics of a friendship because of the amount of time that has to be rearranged - but it doesn't have to be a choice between one or the other, it just takes some effort to make sure the friendship stays solid.