imagi

I agree abou getting checked every time you switch partners. And if you're really nervous about it, there isn't any harm in being tested just to be sure and calm your nerves down a lot. I know one of my friends gets tested once every six-ten months, but he sleeps around quite a bit.

I think I'm coming from a very different perspective because I'm not really a believer in heaven or hell.. I'm a big fan of reincarnation. I find it hard to believe that in one life we'd learn enough to be admitted into some sort of heaven and one life only seems like not enough to condem us to some sort of hell. I refuse, like others, to believe that my best friend would be sent to 'hell' because he couldn't handle what his life was. Life teaches us lessons, and I'm a firm believer that if we end our lives.. it's not a matter of eternal damnation as much as it's a matter of us having to rego through the lessons that we we're supposed to learn in that lifetime. Most people find my rendition a little flaky, but I thought I'd add it because it seemed somewhat different. Kudos, And, if you are suicidal please seek help.

Hi, I've kind of found myself in a predicament. I have been a cutter since I was 13. When I did cut it was pretty intense, and I nearly didn't make it through my worst bought. However, in the last couple of years I've managed to turn myself around, and I haven't cut in 3 years (and pretty much 10 months). I've always made myself open to people who wanted to stop cutting as a support because I feel comfortable with it. In the future I intend to focus my graduate work on people who self-injure, so this is pretty much what I'm looking at as a career as well because I fully believe that the supports available specifically to people who self-injure are horrible in most areas. Okay, so my predicament. All of the people that I've spoken to in the past have done so on their own accord. One of my friends from highschool (we're pretty close, and lived together this past year while we were away at college) contacted me today because her mom requested that she give her my number. My friend did this because her sister self-injures. She had stopped for awhile, but recently began again. When her mom found out, she became distraught and called my friend. In the past, I've been told that me becoming involved with someone has been beneficially because they wanted to talk to someone who understood what they were going through. They came willingly. I have no clue how to approach this person though, and I know her mom will phone me tomorrow to ask me to come by the house and talk to her daughter. I'm worried that this girl is going to freak out because we aren't friends, but we've known each other for our entire lives because of her sister. So my concern/question that I'm getting to is: How would you react in a similar situation? I know this girl really appreciates what her mom does for her, so I'm assuming that she won't be too terribly upset. I still have no idea how to approach the situation. Okay, I'm going to stop ranting. Thanks.

lol I'm just confused what being in Ontario does to it? I would assume that she probably likes you, but 10 emails a DAY seems excessive/obssessive to me. Unless of course you're emailing back and forth, but ten unanswered emails seems.. like a lot. But I would interpret those signs as her liking you none the less.

If you're asking if her being scared could be a reasoning for these episodes, it's always a possibility. However, if she were scared you're reassurances probably would have calmed her down the second or third time. It sounds more like she's just .. not being the greatest person on earth.

I really enjoyed your poem a lot. It was beautiful.

Professional help does wonders for a lot of people. Be wary of therapists who aren't trained to deal with people with self-injury issues, but this is changing more and more as people become more aware of the issue. You should let your parents know what's going on. They may not take it well, but it is always best to be open about problems that you may be facing. You may want to see a doctor if you have cuts that are pretty bad. A doctor is a good avenue to be referred to a therapist too. Good luck with everything

Your situation sounds really similar to my own when I was 14. I had a really hard time dealing with what I was supposed to do too. Somewhere along the line though someone told me something that really helped me. This person told me that I only had to do what I was comfortable with at the time. That my feelings were okay to be feeling, and if it took me time to work through them and that meant not seeing my mom for that time.. then that was what I was comfortable with. I don't know if that helps with the situation that you're in, but I know it helped me out a lot. I spent a couple of years being angry and not wanting to see my mom.. but I took the time to 'do what I was comfortable with' and that helped a lot. Kudos, Miranda

I agree with not contacting him. It's quite natural to still feel like you're in love with him. It's only been three weeks, and being in a relationship for that long with someone is going to take more time than that to get over. I can't even imagine how much that hurts to have someone who you'd been together with for so long to suddenly break up with you. You're going to need more time to mourn and grieve over losing this relationship. I hope that you're okay this weekend. Stay strong. Miranda

I think that NIN is the perfect music for every occasion, but in specific for breaking up.. they're even more perfect. You can't go to any better artist to hear hatred, pity, loathing, sorrow, and forgiveness all in one bundle. You know what you are off of with teeth gave up maybe lol sin is another good one there are dozens lol but those three seem more like power.. move on songs

My best friend died a year and two months ago. He died of a drug overdose which was recorded as accidental, but as the person closest to him I have the feeling that it was intentional. I've gone through all the stages of grieving, and I can honestly say that I am okay with his dying (well as okay as one is when their best friend dies). I spent many many many months being upset and angry and in denial, and actually came out relatively okay. My friend and I were insanely close. We could go months without talking (because school was hectic or our jobs never gave us time to talk) and come back together like nothing had happened. We'd spend night after night staying awake until the early morning and we never ever got bored. When he died I wasn't informed (we were living in two different cities) until about 2 weeks later. I'd spent those two weeks worrying nonstop because I was afraid that he'd been taken to rehab or worse (he'd died). When I found out, naturally I was devastated, so I am really impressed with myself that I've been able to move on and live a relatively normal life. Today however, I don't know what happened. I still haven't been given anything of his because I live pretty far away from his family. His cousin has been meaning to send me things, but she hasn't been able to find everything that I asked for. We were talking today about the list that I'd asked for, and we got to chatting about him. She was pretty close with him too, and it's been just as hard for her because she hasn't had anyone to talk with. I feel like he died yesterday. I recently received a lot of good news about school placement and upcoming jobs for the summer, and the first thing that came to my head was "Oh wow, he'll be sooo happy to hear that I got my first choice". I don't know what happened, but suddenly it just sort of hit me, you know? He's actually dead. We've not spoken for long periods of time several times because of our lives, so I guess in the very deepest part of my thinking it stuck that maybe it was all a lie.. But today it really hit me that he wouldn't be there for me to share any of the things that life would present me with. This isn't so much of a question as it is a rant. Thanks, M

You really need to sit down with Charlotte and figure out why she woudl do that with the prom approaching. If it is just because her friend likes you, that's not far to you or Charlotte. If you like Charlotte and she potentially likes you too, there's no reason for you guys to not go together. I'm sure her friend will understand that you only like her as a friend. Charlotte might have another reason though that she is using her friend as a cover for. You really need to talk it out before you move forward.

I would presume by the way that you describe the cuts on the girl's hand that they are deliberate. I know a lot of people who cut and described it as a way of showing other people that their pain is real. She may be cutting in a place where people notice, but she can still hide it if she's uncomfortable.

That drives girls insane in a bad way. My friend is currently going through this with a guy, and I know in her circumstance she would much rather that the guy was honest and direct. Be coy be charming but be very straightforward lol. It's one thing to ensure that you run into her but another to play a game.

I just read "A Child Called It". It's a really quick read, and it is absolutely fantastic. If you can actually get through it (I've had a couple of people explain that it was just too much for them to read it because of the things that this poor child had to go through), it's absolutely amazing and inspirational.

If you "casually" run into her you can ask her when you see her. But phrase it so that you "want to go grab some coffee to catch up" or something like that. When you guys are out you can feel her out if she'd be up to something like that or drop the hint that you'd like to see her in a less coffee shop (or something different which is also very casual) oriented manner.

I don't really know how to describe this, but my ex really really loved it when I held my legs up. Deeper penetration and such.

There are sexual pain disorders too where the person experiences the typical features of sexuality (desire, arousal, plateau and orgasm), but they experience extreme pain along with it. I don't really remember what the causes or treatments are, and it is more than likely what everyone else is saying.. but what you were saying about how she likes being fingered and she is arouses sufficiently made me think of that.

I think you should tell your parents. They'll be suspicious, and hiding the fact that you cut from people that care about you isn't the best way to go. You should tell them though, that you haven't cut since March. That's an awesome achievement which you should be extatic about. When you talk to them you should frame it that you do have a problem and you've taken measures to stop and you haven't since March.. but you shouldn't hide it.. they probably won't believe you anyway.

My friends and I usually find something to do for a year's worth of birthdays. ie., when we were 16 it was surprise sleepovers, 17 was early morning breakfast's, 18 was dinner, 19 was the year where we went out for our first drinks, etc. We never make too too big of a deal of things, but we always keep it the same so that one person didn't get something "really out there"

I'm not a dream expert either, but I really enjoy looking at dream theorists. Fritz Perls thought that dreams were an extension of you. Each aspect of your dream is supposed to be some sort of conflict that you're working out inside your head. I think in this circumstance he would break down the people in your dream and wonder if perhaps you feel like Virgil.. betrayed or some sort of extension onto that. Or person murdering him (not that you want to murder someone) but frustration at someone in some way.. or you feel like you did in your dreams, desperate. I would apply the same sort of questions to the dream about your dad.. Dreaming about death can also mean change.. I know when I dream about death its like a subconscious alarm going off in my head that something big is in the works. I think everyone's got some sort of intuitive sense. If it doesn't come through when you're waking it's sure to come through when you're asleep. You said that you don't believe in that sort of thing though. hmm. Sometimes dreams are also just.. random. Well, some people believe that.. I don't, but most people do. So maybe you dreaming about death isn't anything more than some random dream that's coming through to the surface.

Yeah, I don't think I would want to either. Even the worst of the worst nightmares teach me something. They might keep me up for a couple of weeks and my scare the wits out of me, but I have them to help me deal.. so I can't imagine wanting to change that. .

I think first response is the brand that has a test you can take before the period is scheduled to begin. I don't know how many days ahead of your girlfriend's period, but I'm pretty sure that is the brand that does it. But maybe it isn't where you are because there are different brands in different countries.

I always cut where people would be able to see, but then I kept it as hidden as humanly possible. I never did it when I thought someone would see me because I had a bad incident with my brother seeing me do it. I wore long sleeved shirts to school until I was ready to stop, and then I started to show the scars and healing scabs to everyone. It was my safety so that people knew to be concerned when I wouldn't wear a t-shirt again. Even now I still hide my arms from people when they are first meeting me because I've had so many people react badly to the scars.

Hey, It's awesome that you're trying to stop! I know how hard it is, and I hope that you succeed this time. We're all here for support. And crazy is a relative term. Everyone on earth is crazy. If someone claimed to be sane.. then I wold be would become concerned. Kudos on stopping though! Be safe, stay strong