The Law

Love has to go both ways, he doesn't love you back = end of relationship.

lol never heard of it but i hope you enjoy it,

You are a bad liar and she knows what you have been up to. She isn't buying your story, which is only more reason for her to go ask what is going on. She is much more experienced when it comes to relationships, so if you talk you should really do it at a moment that she doesn't notice it. Since you are roommates she wants to know what's going on, which is only natural, howeveryou are right that you don't have to share your private life. Personally if i where you, i would keep on saying its non of your bussiness, stop asking. But of course this will lead to distrust which causes a gap. You have to take it in account that she is your roommate and thereforeeee its important to maintain a good relationship because your constantly have to deal with her. So try to change subjects every time she asks for it.

Take the power of your life back where it belongs into your own hands. Take the initiative, its 2006 girls can speak for themselves on what they want.

*hugs* that's a most terrible experience, basically he gave you the cold shoulder, because he drew a line and wanted nothing to have to do with you anymore. Personally i think that thereforeeee the miscarriage is a blessing if you take in aspect that a horrible future which begins with a shattered relationship and you being a single mom ,isn't the best of future to start out with for neither you or your would be child. I would see it as you getting a second chance to meet someone wonderfull in your life to have a child with who truelly DOES care about you, and takes your feelings in aspect. What you have to do now is to find support with your family and friends as wel as in here. i recommend you take theraphy sessions to talk out your problems too. Im a little upset with how the things went , the rule is future first, children later. Basically you went with him, having a child while you weren't married , i doubt you two had a house together, and the relationship wasn't stable. You should definitly first find the stability in your life before you undertake something as important as being a mother. I think you can be a great mother, you just have to get your act together, and make sure to provide the best possible future for yourself, and placing in securities in your life. Because quite personally i hope something horrible as this never happens to you ever again.

Put your mind on zero and ask her out, its a win win situation for you, heck you always miss if you never shoot right? If she says no you can at least say to yourself 'i tried' and if she says yes you got a date. What has being shy ever done good for you in your life? Nothing, so get rid of it. Whatever you do in life always go for gold.

Its no problem at a later point do your honeymoon over with your husband and make it a succes, (who says you can only have 1 honeymoon) You know the point in your life is that you have to allow yourself to be successfull in things. Make short means with everything that is in your way. And refuse to take part off a stressfull situation. Look like a farmer can only take so much hay on its fork, you can only bear so many things before you fall. So be sure to deal with things in a way that its within your coping range, if you can't hold out, ask someone to help you, i mean there's people who could extend hopefully a hand, although you shouldn't rely on such more then necessary , that your brother got drunk, well that can happen and you didn't do it on purpose, you shouldn't worry to much about it, make a good distinguish in your life towards what things are trivial and what things really matter, set priorities and advance in your life in terms of growth,wealth , and most important loving and helping other people.

Time for you to find your support in here.I personally would write him a letter that he should do all in his power available to escape from his abusive alcoholic mom. However maby its a good thing going to the aunt and he will have a reasonable life there. You know your friend also needs support, i think in modern times it should still be able to contact him, in that sense that you two really have to discuss the current situation with eachother to find some sort of mutual agreement and assurance over eachothers well being. You say you can't drive at the moment, i was afraid i saw a wheelchair in the background of your display pic =\ i hope they are exersise equipment tho. I feel so sorry for you that you lost your best friend like this. However do not dispair , in these kind of situations the circumstances can change quickly, some for the better some for the worst, if things are unstable at his aunt too, then he might just get send back, im not sure. You must understand that there are sometimes that life doesn't go your way, you can only hope for the best while expecting the worst in these kind of circumstances. Finding new friends is hard, but you have to understand that its wrong to live like a hermit. I agree that you have to be like a castle gate, and push out bad people/things/events out of your life, and pull in the good people/things/events. To be honest its pretty much useless to worry about the things that you cannot change in your life, its only worth worrying about those things that are within your reach, and those things that you can change something for the better about. Thats why its best for you to meanwhile that he's gone make the best out of your life,although no one can replace your friend, from the 6 billion people out there, i hope you can still find someone who is more or less still capable of being your friend. Keep your chin up high, because behind the clouds shines the sun, maby if you invest a lot of effort things will go better for you in the future, because eventually life is what you make of it, and no action = no reaction. So its best to get a get up n go attitude , and get the least amount of emotional damage towards this whole situation.

I would step back and watch the cat come out of the tree. You have no idea where this is going, although what you say may indeed happen, you have no garentee. I like you to step out of the relationship, the reason for that is because she chose him over you, means that you are not her nr.1. And that's enough for me to be not commited to her. So im raising a red flag here as her decision making puts him over you.

Ask yourself the question. Is he with me so i can make his life unhappy, or are you with him so he can make your life miserable? Of course not , couples are supposed to make eachother happy. Thats why you have to put love and light into eachothers lives on a continues basis. Even small arguments can lead to BIG break ups, this because they act like droplets of poison, adding darkness and hatred into the relationship.So make sure you never start an argument, and if he starts make sure that you don't give another spin to that wheel of hatred. You see, you cannot fight evil with evil, because only evil will win, you can only fight evil with love, if every argument is countered with another hatefull argument, then the wheel of hatred will just keep on spinning. Be sure to be in a relationship to bring happyness to eachother. Always stay and talk in a calm way, stop putting poison into eachothers lives, and don't make elephants out of mosquito arguments, if its really that pittyfull then you don't have to win the argument to begin with, because there's nothing important at stake, Always ask yourself if the argument is worth while risking the relationship.

Basically you underestimated the situation, and now your entangled. The only thing a fly can do when it flies in a spidersweb that it didn't notice is to try to get losoe from its stickyness with an enormous struggle. And quite frankly i think it will be an enormous struggle to deal with it. As far as i see it you only have to options 'accept' or 'reject' , personally i would 'accept' The reason for this is that wether you like it or not the 'three' of you will always be attached/connected to eachother, and to be honest you've already gone to far, you have a child with her, and that child needs you. She has two kids with him, who have the right to see their father, she has the right to see him,because she has the free will to be with whomever she wants. However this puts you in a all too difficult situation, however bear with it, find acceptance and unconditional love for him and his family, yes i know three is a crowd, but since this was something you could see beforehand, it would be the way of the coward to bail out. Lets face it ,this situation is up to in your neck, if you want to survive this odeal, then you'll have to have a long breath and hold out. However in the worst case scenario that a divorce would take place, you would just have to throw it on a custody case that you have to discuss with a lawyer,(although i don't want such a situation at all). A lawyer however is expensive and should be avoided at all costs, and if custody struggles get ugly it can cost you your emotional and financial health. Most men wouldn't accept it, and i won't blame you if you don't. I personally wouldn't think about what's best from my point of view, but fight for my child.

Life is for us to enjoy in a positive constructive way. Sex is just a tool to show us our love for eachother. Its not a tool of torture or designed to make you unhappy. As said to give and receive love , a life of a human doesn't last long,and the same counts for almost all living creatures in nature, compare a life with the time that the earth is around and you see that are lives are flashes that's why everything is so focused on reproducing, not just humans. Its also how we as species survive, and why males are so obsessed with having sex. Woman seem to find everything interesting exept sex.

LD'S can only work out if you two come together for good. so live with her.

Get a get up n go attitude. When you want to talk to a girl just put your mind on zero and go for it. Its a win win situation for you if you ask her out and she says no you can at least say to yourself i've tried, if she says yes you got a date, and you get dating experience in both cases. You always miss if you never shoot right? What has being shy ever done to you, you need to be more outgoing, with the right people that is then.

If you say something like this it means that you are spiritually attached to your looks, you put all kinds of conditions on yourself and on how you look before you love yourself. You should love yourself unconditionally no matter how you look,so you can say to yourself looks don't matter to me.

Nothing in this universe can bring you happyness exept loving and helping other people. This because the meaning of life is to love and help others, currently you are your own worst enemy when it comes to relationships. You have to 'allow' a woman in your life, not so that she can make you happy, rather to understand that the happyness is in the giving ,rather then the receiving part. You see the universe acts like a mirror what you put into it will be reflected back at you, if you put love and light into the lives of the people that you meet in your life on a constant basis, that love and happyness will be reflected back in your life.

You need to start to love,believe,support yourself, If you loved yourself then you wouldnt give damn how you would look,or what others think of it. Imagine you are a pretty face, and it gets smashed in a car accident, you still have to continue living, you are forced to re-think your inner values, because your outer values are of no meaning. I had that accident, and even tho my face was in shambles(when i looked in the mirror i saw a monster) i will never forget how my mother kept on loving me, and supported me. Even tho i had to eat food thru a straw and my teeth where in plaster, i needed to support myself. what weight concerns we have heavy weight running in the family, whats truelly important is that you can look in the mirror and say 'im satisfied with who i am ' 10/10 that there's nothing wrong with you, just accept yourself even if it was just for 1 day for who you are. Love,believe and support yourself.

You should write her a letter too, God doesn't forbid Gay relationships, if two people hetrosexual or gay have sex with eachother only to forfill their lustfull desires then its wrong, but if two people truelly love eachother then its perfectly allowed to show that person your love to them. If i where you i would fight for my relationship.

Well its clear you are considered as a rival and not as a friend, and this is sad because it doesn't have to be that way, its not your fault. If i where you id put an end to the friendship and just go your own way. But before that you should try to salvage , and talk in private to Sue about how you are being excluded, you at least need to complain on how you are always being left out. Its only fair if the attention gets equally shared, why can't you people just get along with eachother? Honestly your right about the immature part, however even immatureness needs to be dealt with. Definitly talk to Sue about this, and if it doesn't work out ,too bad and leave the group.

A relationship is all about being together, but still being able to do your own thing. If you get too clingy the partner might feel like suffocating, Its like passionate kisses, every now and then you need to breathe.

Id put girl g as your number 1, and girl s as your number 2. Basically because i think S is just wanting to hold you on a leash, will G seems to be more deeply into you. You also had something much longer with her, so as long as there is an oppertunity for a future with G, i would continue to stay with her.

Seems like she thinks that he has an eye on you. Which is making her insecure , because she has an eye on him. Personally if i where you, id fabricate one of them 'girlie' talks on who you like, then you can state something like 'oh i love my current bf forever, and were gonna get married'(or whatever) to indicate that your not her rival. That way you can open the gate for her to chase this guy or whatever from that points its none of your bussiness ,but at least it will stop her breathing in your neck. Not sure if the guy is going to continue the ldr, but from my personal point of view i think she wants to make a move on him, no reason why you shouldn't let her have her way so..

Guys like girls who are easy to get. This goes in totally against who you are, and its all about chemistry. Imagine you have a cylinder and water. And imagine you have a pen in your hand. Now draw a line which represents your demands, the higher you draw the line on the cylinder, the greater your demands. You have 3 buckets of water which represents guys you like, one with almost nothing, one with medium amount and one with full amount. Now if you would have drawn the line way up, then only the bucket with full water would reach the top of the cylinder, if you drew it medium , two buckets would forfill your demands, way low 3 buckets. So you see, the more you lower your standards, the more chance you have in meeting a guy. Im not saying drop all your standards, standards are good in that sense that they push out certain characteristics that you absolutely don't want in your life, however if you put it up too high, you will see only 1 or non of the buckets has the content to meet up with your demands. In terms of dependance you score low also, maby you've heard of Pamela Anderson divorcing lately, heck all the Hollywood stars divorce on and off all the time,why is this? Well the answer is they don't 'need' eachother, financially they are independent and with people who can buy anything, don't bother to make an effort into making things right, rather just ditch what they dislike. Compared to the poor woman, who has to live with her abusive husband because he provides her with food. If you compare both, you'll see how some people are far more dependant on others then people who can have everything arranged in their lives solemnly. This is what makes you so unattractive in terms of a relationship, you are a bussiness woman who has everything in her life arranged on her own, so basically this cancels out a lot of reasons for men to try to date you. Its true most men are ashamed if the lady earns more, although they can get used to it, it will cause 'pride' issues. Or in other words your basically a victim of your own succes. However this doesn't mean that you should give up your job and not at all to stay with a guy who treats you like trash. You still need to be like a castle gate and only open yourself up to good people/things/events and push out bad people/things/events out of your life. So my advice would be lower your standards, and demands to the right level. And emotionally open yourself up to a nice guy. You are your own worst enemy in not getting a guy, because you have to allow a nice guy into your life.

Its no good that you left out what these exact differences ,what second thoughts and hesitations she has, because they are essensial as they are the root of the problem. If you can please post them.

Her mind is definitly twisted, undecisive and lacks l-o-y-a-l-t-y , she knows and admits that she is stupid, so i'll give her credit for aknowledging that much. Personally i wouldn't want to be with her, because she has a lot of factors that cause unstability in the relationship. Her commitment to you is thinner then a fishing line, you know this is a classic Dog + Leash type of relationship, if you let the leash too loose the dog will run away, if you hold it too short the dog will suffocate , so holding it at bay in the middle is just right. At this moment she(the dog) does whatever she want and is running wherever she wants , meaning you have no control over her whatsoever. You need to pull her back and demand responsibility over the actions of why she just left you the other night, to me it didn't even seem that you complained, meaning you are letting her walk all over you and getting away with it. And personally i think that is your fault in all of this, exersise more control over this relationship as i explained in the dog on a leash method.