Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb

Well when I was younger my first real french was simplify just a thanks and to be polite a return of a kiss (light lip smooch). If she's done that recently then tell her you neva got to return her kiss. Below you'll find a copy of my kissing guide, hope it helps:

I don't think that's a good idea at all. You're gonna hav a lotta problems. I mean a lot of peple will not understand nor accpt the fact that you're 20 and she's 14. That's really scary but if you love each other or are determined to give it a go, go right on ahead, don't let anyone stop you. But just a word of warning: dont expect it to be a easy cruise. Happy Heb

Don't let it get 2 you. Be happy with who you represent and no one can get you for it. Just keep trying, not everyone has perfect looks. Think positive instead of negative, it'll see you through. Happy heb

Don't be cut up, give it sometime, it should be worth it and DON'T pressure her into it. Maybe she's neva done it before... Happy Heb

I don't think he's mad... I mean you just met the guy, its not like ur in a rush. If you didn't kiss him, he shouldn't be mad because of that, if he is, its not really worth it. Unless he reached in and you leaned out or he did make a move etc. Happy Heb

I've heard that "in limbo foreva lost" in that hit drama Charmed about those 3 witches. The poem's nice, its deep so it has a lot of hidden things I reckon. I like it, challenging. Happy Heb

Yea everyone's got it right I reckon. Its more of what you think about yourself, I personally don't find myself too attractive but I'm ok with who I represent so no matter what, people can't get to me too much. I guess what I'm trying to say is that, as long as you're happy with your looks, then you'll have nothing to worry about. A relationship cannot be based upon looks, coz looks can only take you so far, its the personality that remains the same throughout the years, remember that. Happy Heb

Yup its all true. Don't b shy but watch for expressions. Happy Heb

Hey: try this link removed Hope it helps. HappyHeb

lol I'm pretty happy for you. Its actually rarer these days for that to happen even though i still encourage every single person out there who asks me for advice on it and to spill out your feelings is even harder! Congrats Happy Heb

lol o so you did have a talk eventually. That's really not on, what she's done. When you go and advertise yourself on a online dating website, you expect your bf 2 trust you?!?! Why? so you can go run off with another guy? That's really bs 2 me. She could've been a bit more understanding too, being annoyed and you even had a good reason to be a little untrustworthy. Why didn't you ask her that: "How am I supposed to know what I need to ask for?" You had ever right I reckon to ask and have doubts...I don't think she's being very nice by doing and saying what she has done. Do you put urself on online dating sites? O yea, and its not about trust, NO ONE can fully trust their gf/bf if they found them on a online dating website. Seriously, unless you dont' really care about them. Happy Heb

I still don't see how option 2 can be a lil low...IF you don't trust her. She's obviously not doing her part and it does her a lot to find things out last even if itsn't about ur gf on a dating website. Think about it, if you dont' trust her, which it sounds like you dont' right now or you probably would've talked by now why give her a chance to find a way out or bring it up so you can buy her time to find an excuse? Happy Heb

lol hey maybe she doesn't use it anymore and its just there. and a question i need to ask you is: what are YOU doing on a online dating site? Ask her, it could all be a misunderstanding or tell you what, why don't you try and be someone else and respond to her ad and see what's really going on for yourself if you don't trust her. Happy Heb

lol Australian replies all the way! Hmm I dunno, I suppose just take him out more, drag him to places, he'll get comfortable sooner or later. Practice makes perfect. Happy Heb

I'd go for it even if no one talked 2 me and the girl didn't contact me either! But I'm a bit outgoing so I suppose I wouldn't help much. I think if you constantly contacted him etc etc, he'll become less shy. Happy Heb

lol, I'm not sure what he wants. Perhaps he's seeking some attention? Does he feel neglected from you a lot? There's so many possiblities, confront him with the situation. How do you kno he's not missing for real? Sorry can't help much Happy Heb

Hey zesty girl. I know what you mean by the different personalities. And I've recently had the same problem myself. She treats me like crap and I decided I wanted to leave her but I realised that I'd rather get hurt by her than nothing at all. Anyway, I'm not exactly sure what he wants but maybe he's not cheating, his "extra work" could be because he wants some space from you to think, because that's what I wanted, to make choices w/o being influenced. All I can say is if you want him back, then do the things he wants you to do, if he doesn't want you to do anything, then give him the space, don't pressure or make him feel pressured into anything. Hope that helps a bit Happy Heb

I have a feeling you're a very insecure person, like many others and myself too. I don't believe in Long Distance Relationships (LDR) unless its only short term as I don't see just how they can work out. Being a month and a bit away from my girl drove me crazy but it's kinda a lesson to be learnt and it teaches you just how much you need that special someone around. Here are some tips for your LDR Communication Keeping in touch is important, but it doesn't necessarily have to be expensive. Talking on the phone is great but I recommend trying to alternate who's footing the bill. Short upbeat messages left on the answering machine are nice too - you can play them over, and over, and over.... I can't say enough about how important e-mail can be. It's faster than mail, and it's cheaper than the phone. You can get an e-mail account at most colleges prepaid by your tuition. Snail-mail is important, too. A handwritten letter, or a card "for no reason" can go a long way. Communication means talking about what's going on in your life, and how you're feeling about things. If you don't communicate, your SO(significant other) probably isn't going to read your mind. Communication also means listening! On a sub-topic, there are a lot of fun things you can send in the mail: Holiday related items, tapes with music mixes, cute things you find in gift shops, videos if you have the equipment, poetry (yours, or stuff you've found), and songs. My favorite is one of those blank puzzles that you can find in card shops or art stores - make a picture/message, and send a couple of pieces at a time with letters and cards. Cookies are cute, too, if you can manage it. Trust In order to pull off a LDR, you need to have a LOT of trust in your partner. If you don't, you may end up wasting a lot of time wondering where they are and who they're with. Insecurity isn't a good attribrute to drag into a LDR. And here's your main problem, there isn't really a lot you can do but trust this girl you're with, after all, she is someone you're looking into having around in the future, how can you not trust her and if you are unable to trust her, how can you even live with her? Respect If you are leaving your SO's home area to go to college, other studies, or job reasons, do form new friendships. At college especially, you're going to a new place, and forming a new life. SO's should respect the existence and time devoted to this new life. A new life doesn't mean you don't care about your partner anymore, it means you're are still a living, breathing, valuble person when they aren't around. It also cuts down on the ever-present "I-miss-you!" loneliness/longing. Respect your partner's decision to live a life which doesn't revolve solely around you. Honesty Be honest about how you feel about your relationship, and what's going on in your life. Again, mind reading is unusual. If your studies or job are keeping you busy, or if you're sick, tell you partner - it's easier to understand why you haven't e-mailed in a while, or why you seem cranky/moody. Don't forget to tell them about the good things happening in your life as well as the bad ones! In the unfortunate case you decide that the relationship isn't working - for goodness sake, don't just leave the other person in the dark, be honest with them. This doesn't mean being rude or thoughtless. Try to avoid telling them before major exams, or during finals. And don't leave it on an answering machine. Love and commitment are also important, but I think that goes without saying. Believing in true love/ destiny might help, too. As to visiting each other, it depends on the distance, your financial situation, and what kinds of public or private transportation methods are available to you. Who pays for who to go where when and how often can end up being a point of contention, so be careful. During visits, you may feel a bit awkward - sometimes I do, sometimes I don't - and things are still working. You may want to take things slow for the first few days. And in my experience, the goodbyes get a little bit easier each time. Parents can be a "problem" for many teens entering in to LDRs, especially those begun online. Remember that most of the time they are trying to do what they think is best. They've seen scary things on the news, and like anyplace else, the internet has its dangers. Parents don't always have a full grasp of all that the internet is, and they don't feel like it's something the have control over - this makes them want to protect you from it. Try to explain things to them, and try to be patient. Try to avoid going behind their backs - if they find out (and they have a knack for it) they feel even less in control, and that will make things worse for you. I've had parents ;-) , so feel free to e-mail and ask for advice regarding them. What about what other people think? Some people may think you are wasting time in attempting a LDR: "Why bother? It never works." (Wrong - Explore the web, successes exist). Other people think it is a very brave thing to do and will regard you highly because of it. However, it's not what other people think that should matter in deciding whether to enter into a LDR. It's what you and your partner mean to each other. Nonetheless, it is more helpful to have supportive friends. Remember,"Absense makes the heart grow fonder". or as some believe it "Absense makes the heart cheat" - and its true enough too! Happy Heb

Allright I've recently received a PM from a certain member asking me about french kissing. That I think is a topic that does come up commonly here on enotalone, so I thought perhaps its time I put a post up in case anyone else is interested in reading as well as the member himself. Here goes... Getting Into Things - When Should you Kiss? Be Sure YOU Want To There is a huge amount of pressure that goes along with the First Time you kiss someone. Media bombards people with messages, parents give messages, friends give messages. Try to tune ALL of those out, and think about yourself. How do you feel about it? How do you feel about your relationship? Will your decision be one that makes you proud? You need to do what is best for *you*. Do not let yourself be pressured into anything. Work Up to It Don't just go in to kiss someone you haven't even touched before. Read all of the to build up the comfort level between you two. When you kiss you don't want her nervous about your hand on her arm, before you even get your lips near her! Set a Relaxed Scene You´re going to probably be nervous the first time just because it *is* the first time. Plan the surrounding time and situation to be as comforting as possible. Do it somewhere quiet, not the doorstep of your date's house! Make sure no little brothers or sisters or friends are running around. Give yourself time so you're not rushed. If you are comfortable, everything else becomes that much better. Stay Comfortable A key thing to keep in mind as your relationship progresses is that it should always be COMFORTABLE. This should be someone you can tell all your thoughts to, that accepts you for YOU and isn't trying to change you. So as you go from just talking to hand-holding to hugging and more, these shouldn't be sudden, scary, threatening changes. They should be changes that you both are comfortable with and both enjoy. Here are some ways to stay comfortable: Start with Casual Touch Every person has 'personal space' around them that they are trained from birth to respect. If you went into a room and someone strange walked up to you and stood right against you, touching you, while they talked to you, you'd feel upset and uncomfortable. So the first stage in a relationship is to get through that personal space issue - feel comfortable in each other's space. To do this, start getting closer, gradually. If you're sitting on a bench seat together, don't leave a giant gap! Sit next to the person. Don't mash into them, but be gently against them, that this is an OK and normal thing for you two to touch. Don't make a big deal out of it. The aim is to slowly get both of you used to the touch-is-ok idea. Touch while Flirting Touch is a key part of flirting! When you come by to say hello, touch the person on the arm or shoulder (or whatever's near) to get their attention and say hello. If you see an eyelash on their cheek, reach over and brush it away gently. Make touch an "ok" part of your relationship, to build along to future touching! The Cold-Weather Gambit This is a cliche now because it's so overused. But forget your jacket or sweater sometime. Any excuse to wear each other's jackets or to wrap your arms around each other to "keep warm" is a good one It's a perfectly reasonable request - you don't want to be cold! But the results are quite nice too! Move to Hugging Goodbye Hugs are non-threatening once you're already used to touching each other casually. So the next time you say goodbye for a long period of time - say a week vacation or even just a weekend - give a quick hug goodbye. Nothing long and serious. Remember, you're sort of "training your body" to think of these things as normal and comfortable. Just a friendly "I'll miss you." The more natural it gets to be, the better! Don't rush through any of these stages, savor each one, and how special it is. The more you enjoy each stage, the better they are! Keep Expectations Reasonable Media gives us HUGE expectations for the first time. There will be bells ringing, fireworks exploding. Remember, this is a personal expression between just you two. Truly learning to please each other will evolve over a lifetime. The first time is just the first step - in hopefully a long series of steps bringing you closer together. First Kiss - General Hints How do I kiss him/her for the first time? *Softly and slowly. You don´t want to bump faces on your first time out. A sweet brush of lips feels good whether it´s your first time or your hundred and first time. *Remember that a kiss is a very sensory act. You´ll be close enough to breath the person in, to feel their skin against yours. Side note - be sure you showered earlier! *Relax! *Be aware of your partner. Is he/she leaning in or holding back waiting for you to move? If they´re leaning in, you can gently lay one hand against their cheek and lean to meet their lips. *Begin with your lips closed. Keep it soft and light. Leave the fancy stuff for later on - the first kiss is about savoring the *moment* of how special it is that you are now at the kiss. First Kiss - Specific Instructions First, everybody kisses differently. And everybody likes to be kissed differently! So your true aim is to find out what style YOU enjoy, and then what style your MATE enjoys and how to meld the two. Some like gentle kisses. Some like passionate kisses. Some like dry kisses. Some like wet, sloppy kisses. Your first kisses should be slow, langorous, gentle. They're a progression from the hug, and a way of furthering the touch in a more intimate way. You should already be comfortable with the hug with this person, and comfortable standing close face to face. So now the only 'new' thing you're introducing is the kiss. When you're near the person (standing or sitting) and ready for the kiss, it's good to start with a cheek-kiss. That's an "innocent kiss" and a "you're special" move. Either the boy OR the girl can do this. Squeezing his/her hand at the same time is another way of saying "you're special". You can see if your partner likes this, or feels uncomfortable. If they're uncomfortable, no big deal, just stay at that level until the comfort comes back again, maybe in a few days or a week or two. But let's say you both enjoy the cheek-kiss and are ready for more. You already have the "it's ok to kiss" mentality down now, which is good. So now instead of going for the cheek, go for the lips. Again, be soft. Press your lips gently against your partner's, and savor the sensation of their skin against your own. Just hold it for a few moments, then release. Once you're comfortable with the basic kiss, you can move on to other styles! Kissing Basics There is NO right or wrong way to kiss. Every person kisses differently. And everybody likes to be kissed differently! So your true aim is to find out what style YOU enjoy, and then what style your MATE enjoys and how to meld the two. Some like gentle kisses. Some like passionate kisses. Some like dry kisses. Some like wet, sloppy kisses. If your last girlfriend said you were an awful kisser, it just means you weren't her style. Your next girlfriend could think you are a FABULOUS kisser, even if you kiss in exactly the same way. FOCUS on the person you are kissing. You shouldn't be distracted or absent minded or humming a song. The person you're kissing will want to feel like this kiss is really special. Also, hopefully it goes without saying, brush your teeth and gargle! You want VERY fresh breath if someone is going to up near it. Don't put on lots of gloss or lipstick. The kiss shouldn't be gooey, it should be skin on skin. Start with the Cheek When you're near the person (standing or sitting) and ready for the kiss, it's good to start with a cheek-kiss. That's an "innocent kiss" and a "you're special" move. Either the boy OR the girl can do this. Squeezing his/her hand at the same time is another way of saying "you're special". You can see if your partner likes this, or feels uncomfortable. If they're uncomfortable, no big deal, just stay at that level until the comfort comes back again, maybe in a few days or a week or two. Move On to the Lips If you've done the cheek kiss first like you should have, you've already shown your partner that "it's ok to kiss". Think of it as training you both to learn new behaviors So Kissing is Good. Now you're just changing your kissing method. Instead of going for the cheek, go for the lips. Again, be soft. Your first lip kisses should be slow, langorous, gentle, with a closed mouth. Press your lips gently against your partner's, and savor the sensation of their skin against your own. Just hold it for a few moments, then release. Always show how much you enjoy these steps, with a smile or a sigh. Your partner will always be nervous about "did I do that well enough?" Show them that they did, so they are encouraged to do it again! Close Mouthed to Open Mouthed The first big step in kissing progression is to go from the normal 'hello/goodbye' closed-mouthed kiss to an open-mouthed kiss. You do this with your tongue. When you're close-mouthed kissing in a quiet, relaxed area, now tickle your tongue against their lips. Do it in a gentle, teasing way, as if you're saying "Hello ... let me in ..." Eventually slide your tongue gently into your partner's mouth, just a little. Do little, gentle experimentive probes. Your partner will be wondering, "What will happen next?" You want that to be an exciting thing, not a nervous thing. So go slowly. Tickle your partner's lip, and then tongue. Now draw your partner's tongue into your own mouth. French Kissing French Kissing is the more erotic style of open mouthed kissing. It is in essense kissing that brings to mind parts of the full sex act, so thereforeeee is very arousing because of the mental images it causes. Either the guy or girl can do this. First, take your tongue and make slow, gentle circles around your partner's tongue. Go slowly at first, then more and more quickly. Then plunge your tongue down along your partner's tongue, sliding down it until your tongue is fully extended. Do that one or two times, then slowly slide your tongue back out and start with the gentle circling again. Your Hands You don't want your hands to be all over creation during this kind of kissing - it's distracting!! There's plenty of time to do hand stuff later on. Right now you're doing amazing things with your tongue and you want that to be the focus. Your tongue can be MUCH more erotic than your hands could be. So keep your hands up around their head, cupping the back of their head, rubbing along their necks and shoulders, running it thorugh their hair, pulling their back so they are pressed into you. The more you focus the attention solely on your mouth and tongue, the stronger the impact will be. When you're Done Don't run off! Your partner is probably thinking, "That was great, what does he/she think?" You want to leave a POSITIVE impression. Pull back slowly. Look into your partner's eyes. Smile. Sigh. Don't laugh, even if you're nervous. Think of a calm after a storm, and just murmur something encouraging like "wow" or "that was *nice*" or just the person's name. Overview: Set the scene. Make sure that the mood and time are right. Relax! Take a deep breath and let go of any tension in your neck and shoulders. Put your arms around the person you want to kiss. Start off with a normal kiss, not too firm, not too aggressive. Closing your eyes is optional. In mid kiss, gently open your mouth and softly nudge the other persons mouth open using your tongue. Again, not too aggressively, move your tongue inside the other persons mouth and playfully touch their tongue. Read the other persons body language, if they seem tense or start to pull away, stop what you are doing. If they open their mouth more or otherwise indicate they like the kiss, keep on doing what you have been only with a little more passion. As the kissing gets going saliva build up can be a problem, don't forget to swallow. Make sure you keep your tongues relaxed but your lips tight (saliva again), you don't want the kiss to turn messy. Extra Tips: Don't forget to breathe. Since French Kissing is "wetter" than other kinds of kissing it is a good idea to start with dry lips, don't lick them first. If one of you have braces you can still French Kiss, you just have to be more careful and not as forceful when things get passionate. If both of you wear braces you can still French Kiss, you just have to be very gentle and avoid touching teeth. French Kissing takes practice, but at least it is fun to practice this one! Ok, luck every1 Happy Heb

lol how'd u get it apart?

Hey. Jealousy is annoying. I was recently in ur situation but this guy really had some guts, I knew him, he was already my friend and he started drifting on me and gettin close to her. I was annoyed and told her, had a fight or 2 and basically in the end, I don't care. If she truly loves you then she will, and if she's gonna cheat on you with someone else, it'll happen sooner or later, why prevent it? The faster you find out, the better. In addition, you have to trust her, sometimes they do it just for a bit more attention, and if you think that's what she wants, then give it to her but if u wanna b tricky then don't and she can keep going on about this guy, just act like u don't care and back off a bit, avoid her. See what happens, u got 2 choices by me anyway. Happy Heb

Hey perhaps you should buy some lubricant and jerk off that way. I'm not sure why you ain't unloading but if I were u, I'd go and try everything I possibly can. Maybe she's not doing enough to please you, like its you all giving? Happy Heb

lol don't runaway, coz then, u'd be running foreva, the past always catches up and do you really want to live in a dream? Face it head on, just accept things and like urself or well I dont' think option B is quite suitable. Happy Heb

Its often common for people like you to feel down in cases like these. Always bought up with your brothers as "perfect" role models and perhaps its been more you, maybe you always felt like you had to be as good or better than them. In some cultures it is true, guys tend to get treated better, however, in western societies that is not always the case. I think its time you accept yourself for who you are, you don't need to please your family and maybe you never will, deep down they probably are proud of you but they'll never admit it. Don't let your family cut you down from life, there's a whole new world out there. 'luck Happy Heb

Hey Pablo! Yea I feel for you man, 21 and never kissed a girl. Hmm casual sex, you tried desperate places like clubs etc or like a pub? Cybersex is pretty easy, you can find it straight on the net. lol hang on, did you say pick up a good person? woah, now you're gonna have to decide, are you looking for sex or a relationship? sex is basically you don't care about the personality, sometimes not even looks coz hey once the lights are off, its all the same. Sorry I can't help much coz I havent' really been in your situation before. Maybe you should try parties. Happy Heb