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aymee_lee

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Everything posted by aymee_lee

  1. aymee_lee
    Well, might I just throw a spanner in the works and say...never? To me it's like tickling myself. If I'm the only one there it's a bit predictable, and far less fun than when there's two. Relationship or not, I just don't click my own mouse. But good luck to those who do! You guys would probably have a lot more fun in bed alone
  2. aymee_lee
    I don't think you're being overly petty. I think it is difficult at times to see others doing things you wish you were doing, or at least think you should be doing. You say you don't think you're mature enough to get married, but it seems as though, deep down, you wish you were engaged anyway. Personally, I can definitely see why you want to be engaged after 3 years. And sometimes logic takes a back seat when everyone around you is doing things you aren't. Personally, in my group of friends, everyone seems to be buying a house. I would really rather wait a while til I've got some more money, and my bf and I decide where we are going to be living eventually (we live in different cities). While I'm saving I still live at home because it's much cheaper and I'm saving lots. That being said, at times I still wish I was out there playing house and being more independent, even though I know it's not the right decision for me at this point Everyone has different opinions on how long you should be together and how old you should be before you gte married, but everyone is different. I have friends who were married at a younger age as well as friends who have been dating for many years who aren't engaged. You say that some of your friends have set dates for later than '09. That's a fairly long engagement, but it's not highly unusual. I guess one consolation is that when you do get engaged, you'll probably end up married quicker than them! Personally I wouldn't want to wait any longer than a year after getting engaged before I was married, but that's just my own personal choice, and it's not for everyone. As I said, it is hard to not be jealous sometimes. But if you really believe that you and your boyfriend are going to be together and get married eventually, try and keep that in mind. When someone else gets engaged just think 'My time will come'. You only (hopefully) get engaged once, savour the moment. It will ahppen eventually, and when it does, you'll be ready for the committment and you won't be stressed about it. Hope that helps. x P.S- Cookies? LOL!
  3. aymee_lee
    I am very touchy feely as well, and often in conversation will touch my friend's thighs or arms (both guys and girls). I am also very talkative and often if I go out to a club with my friends I will find myself talking to complete strangers for hours on end. My bf knows I am like this, and has no problem with it. In fact, he is also quite a talkative person, probably not the extent I am though. The reason that this works for us is trust. My bf knows that if I'm talking to someone ele it doesn't mean I'm cheating on him. He knows that if I'm touching somone else doesn't mean I'm cheating on him. And he is ok with me being who I am. However, if my bf had a real problem with me doing this, and I felt his opinion was valid, I would do something to correct it. That's not to say that I wouldn't have male friends etc...but sometimes you can't see how much your actions are hurting another and I think it's fair to compromise. The reason we probably get along and don't worry about this is because I have given my bf no reason to believe there is anything else to it, and he is the same for me. But your gf has broken your trust by being unfaithful. And she has to accept that you are going to have a hard time trusting her. I'm sorry to be harsh, but she's managed to make you feel like you have no right to question her at all, when she's the one in the wrong. I guess one could argue that you need to forgive and forget or get out of this realtionship, because really, without trust your relationship will never survive. That being said, if I cheated on my bf four times and he was able to forgive me, I would put in a bit more effort to prove I was trustworthy. And I don't think having your hands up another guys top who you've admitted you're attracted to is proving anything except that she's treating you like dirt and expecting you to take it.
  4. aymee_lee
    Ok, this is a weird situation. I have a bf and I have plenty of male friends so I see no problem with this. However, that does not seem to be the issue here. Why on earth was she disappointed that this other guy only wanted to be friends? And more importantly, why would she tell you this? Do you have an open relationship? Was she flat out telling you of he possible intention to cheat?
  5. aymee_lee
    I'm a primary school teacher. I did my undergrad in social welfare and my post grad in education. I love my job. And one of the best parts...kids really do say the darndest things.
  6. aymee_lee
    'So please don't wait'? What do you think that means? It almost sounds like she means don't wait around for me...Or it could mean you don't need to wait I'm already here? Man, should it be this difficult?
  7. aymee_lee
    Never did it, never will. There are LOTS of people anti drugs, you just need to sift through sometimes to find them. I don't really drink either, and I have never been a big drinker (a glass of wine with dinner is about as far as I'll go). I'm not judging those who do drink, it's just not my thing. And trust me, when I was an 18 year old it would have been easier to get hammered every weekend rather than explain why I wasn't! If you don't want to be friends with smokers, don't be. It's your choice. But lots of people have tried it so if your gf has and you like her and she says she won't again, I'm sure it will be fine.
  8. aymee_lee
    I really have no idea. He could like you, but then again, he could just want to be friends. If he's kissing girls, it sounds like he's straight. And if he's not, sounds like he's not willing to admit anything else at this point. I'd just try and be friends with him. See what happens. If he's not gay/bi, you can at least have him as a friend, rather than come on strong and have him freak out. Sorry, that's all I can say at this point! Good luck x
  9. aymee_lee
    When I was younger I was not a very 'touchy' person. I think I was always worried what others might construe it to mean. I think it comes from high school, where as soon as you go near anyone they say 'Amy loves xxx!' which is of course, ridiculous! But as I got older I felt more comfortable touching others. As in, I will hug my friends (both male and female), or touch their arms/thighs lightly in conversation. My current bf is also very affectionate with me, and I have some affectionate friends and this has led to me being the same with others. Some people are just more touchy than others. I don't think I do this in an innappropriate way, and I would never do it to mere aquaintances or people I didn't know, but if it's a friend, I thinks it's fine. You can usually tell if people want to be touched or not. Maybe this guy just thought he was being helpful. I guess he didn't guage your reaction well. I'd say it's just him. I wouln't read too much into it (and don't worry, I know you're not suffering from insomnia as a result of this! lol)
  10. aymee_lee
    I think she likes you, but she still has feelings for her ex. Also, if she is used to being in a relationship, she will be missing the holding, the kisses, the affection that came with that relationship. I think her affection for you is genuine, but she doesn't know what she wants, and that will most likely end in heartbreak for you. Having said that, if you want to risk it, and you think she's worth it, go for it. Better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all?
  11. aymee_lee
    I don't like cum. I love giving my bf head, but I don't like him cuming in my mouth. I just don't like the taste of it, or the element of surprise (even when warned). I know it seems mean, but that's just me and he accepts that. I'm all for giving head so he can't complain too much! We almost always finish with sex anyway. Maybe your gf is the same. Had a quick look at your blog. It contains Jessica in every category! You are one smitten boy.
  12. aymee_lee
    It is worrying for a girl to think she might start bleeding during sex. It's happened to me actually, but my bf was very understanding. I mean, you can't help it! Sound like you would be understanding too. Might just be a matter of your gf getting more comfortable with you. If you haven't already, reassure her it's ok and if it happens, it happens, just don't freak out if it actually does happen! I also agree with Syrix. Your gf should see her doctor about her periods. Mine weren't bad or anything but after I went on the pill they have reduced in time dramatically (to only about 3 days) and you also know exactly when they're coming. That helps take the stress out of the sex/period situation for everyone
  13. aymee_lee
    I think as it is the first time you had performed oral, you probably just weren't used to it. I'm not sure though- I'm a girl and I've never done it to another girl. As an above poster said, I think you'll get used to it. Also, * sorry to be graphic* you don't need to be right in there tasting it! Sometimes that's good, and everyone is different, but personally (and my friends have said the same thing) I like my bf to focus on my clitoris. And also, that means you won't be 'tasting it' quite so much! Hope that helps.
  14. aymee_lee
  15. aymee_lee
    I had known my bf for about 6 months before we went on a 'date'. We had been out for dinners and stuff before, but just as friends. One night after my sister's birthday dinner we kissed. The next time we met up and had dinner, I was fine, I knew we were 'together' and I felt great about the whole thing. Then I remember making some casual comment during dinner to which he replied '...It's our first date'. After that my head was going 'What?! We're on a date?' And it felt weird! For a minute I was like- 'OMG, this is a date? Wow, now I'm nervous.' It's just funny how people perceive things. I guess after being friends first, the minute we kissed we both just assumed we were a couple (which isn't the case with everyone, but it was in our case). I never really thought of us as going on 'dates'. And yet, he was classifying our dinner as a date. incidentally, before we were a couple we had a discussion where I said I'd only been on a few dates. He seemed shocked, commented on the fact that I'd had a few bf's before (and thereforeeee didn't understand this) and said he'd been on lots of dates. I queried this and said, 'But you were with your last gf for 4 years, when did you have time to go on all these dates?' And he basiaclly said that when he is going out with someone (for the first few months at least) he considers having dinner/going to a movie etc. as 'dating'. Personally, I think it's only a date until you are a couple. A date to me is what you do before you are together. Once you are attaching the bf/gf tag, the dating is over. Then you're just eating dinner together Hey, that's just my opinion though, but one that all of my friends share. We are in our early 20s and live in Aus. Maybe it's a cultural/age thing. No-one seems to 'date' here.
  16. aymee_lee
    You are obviously still having trouble dealing with this situation. I have read and responded to both of your other posts on this issue. What responses were you looking for?
  17. aymee_lee
    Oh Yeah, I have just found your post and read through it. Every time I have seen your posts and read them I have always thought 'Look at that girl, she is just gorgeous!' and it sounds like you are gorgeous on the inside too. You will only leave when you are ready, but I hope that is soon. Imagine if one of your friends was telling you this stuff about their own relationship- what would you think? Go with your gut. You know the way he is treating you is bad. I was with my first bf from 17-21. There weren't the issues you had, but we did break up. The hardest thing for me was realising that I was wrong- we weren't going to grow up and get married and have kids and...everything else you wish would happen with your first love. But realise this- you will be ok. Good luck x
  18. aymee_lee
    Ha ha. That's good And reading back my post I can see what you're saying. But still, I stand by my argument. I have a good job, and 2 degrees, a nice car, and I worked hard to get them. But family, friends and relationship moments are always going to be up there for me.
  19. aymee_lee
    I think it had something to do with the fact that in most cases (I would hope all!) you see a bride on her wedding day, and she's the happiest she's ever been. For me, it's kind of the same as seeing people graduate, or have a child, in most cases (I say most, don't want to generalise too much) they are just SO happy. I like to imagine what my wedding day is going to be like. I used to walk around my Uni during our graduation ceremonies and see people in their gowns and think 'I'm working so hard to get this degree, I can't wait till that's me'. And while I'm not saying the same thing about my wedding (the working hard bit!) , I still think 'Geez, the thought of standing in front of the ones I love the most and saying to my partner 'Let's be together forever' well, that's a pretty nice notion.
  20. aymee_lee
    I had a guy drop everything off when we broke up. Knowing our situation (no cheating or anything like that, we broke up because sometimes, in relationships it's just not right, but he dealt with it terribly, sending me horrible texts at 3 am saying 'I hope you die alone' then calling to apologise the next day) I know he was hoping I'd break down and cry over the fact that he gave me back EVERYTHING I ever gave him. Letters, notes, even an alarm clock I'd given him a month before for his birthday. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but I just thought it made him look like an idiot. It just seemed pathetic, I mean, for goodness sake, the clock? Just keep it! And as for the letters and stuff, I know he thought I'd sob over them but I just chucked them. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but in my situation at least, I didn't think I had 'my face rubbed in it', because I broke it off. Rub my face in what? My own decision that I was happy with, and only felt more confident about after his behaviour when we broke up? You sound like a good guy. Don't end up looking otherwise. I'd keep the notes. I've well an truly moved on from my first ex (not the guy in the above story) but I kept some notes from him. I figure, when I'm 80 I might look back on them with a smile. She's moved on. It's not worth it. Keep up the good NC work if it's helping. Good luck x
  21. aymee_lee
    What's done is done, don't beat yourself up forever. Having a baby is a very emotional expereince. Your baby is only a month old. It's going to be overwhelming. Maybe this is half the problem. I could be way off, but here's a few possibilities regarding why you feel the way you do and some things I get from reading your posts- - Maybe you are just thinking about your ex boyfriend because it seems so much simpler. The reality is, it's probably going to be hard having a new baby with your husband, or your ex. - You are 19. When you were with your ex, you were young and you probably had a lot of fun together with little responsibility. Maybe you are craving that carefree time again and you connect your ex to that time, so thereforeeee you think that if you two get back together, it will be like that again. - Maybe you rushed into things with your husband as a rebound. It's too late to change this, so either decide if you want to give it a real go or not. - You shouldn't walk away from one relationship merely to be in another. I'm not saying it can't work, but if you don't want to be with your husband, you have a right to leave, but I think it should be it's own issue. If your ex wasn't in the picture, how would you feel? Would you still want to leave so much? - Even if you get back together, your ex may not be around forever; you need to accept the possibility that you may walk away from your husband, and still be alone. These are just some opinions on my behalf. I could be totally off track. Good luck.
  22. aymee_lee
    I couldn't agree more. I know that it's hard to see a situation from the outside when you're right in the middle of it, but if you re-read some of your posts on here- what is your gut feeling? Go with that, it's usually right on.
  23. aymee_lee
    I'd just ask him where he thinks the two of you stand. I think it's a horrible way for someone to act towards their partner. The 'treat em mean, keep em keen' thing is just ridiculous! I'm glad you stood up to him in that regard! I just think it's crazy. He knew you were coming to flat with his best friend and he's still acting this way so he can just deal with it. He needs to grow up and treat you the way you deserve. Even if he does just want to be friends he needs to say that. Just tell him that you are not comortable sleeping with him unless he can offer you something better. Give him some time after you have moved to pick up his game if you want to, but if he still acts this rude to you, forget it.
  24. aymee_lee
    Just wondering what people's experiences were...
  25. aymee_lee
    I've been in a LDR (2 hr drive) for about 3-4 months now. It's already driving me crazy! It's really hard. I'm a teacher, and in Aus, the school year ends in Dec. We're tentatively looking at us living together at the end of next year's school year. (It would just be easier to look for another job at the end of a school year for a teacher, rather than half way through the year). Some people might think that it's a bit too early in the relationship to make calls like that, but I agree with the above posters. If you have no end point, it becomes very difficult. We have talked briefly about the possibility of us living together next Dec but obviously with it being a relatively new relationship, nothing is set in stone. But if it got to, say, half way through next year and plans weren't seriously being made, I'd start to get a bit edgy. Mainly because unless I broke contract, if we didn't more in together next Dec, it would most likley be the Dec after that, which I think would be too long (2 and a 1/2 years). I guess the distance makes you evaluate how much you really want the relationship. I realise you can't ever say 'We are together, and that will never change' but we have both said, we need to be in this, really in this, or it's not worth it. It's different when you live in the same town, not everything has to be so planned out and formal. But when you live far away from the beginning, it's hard to be casual about it. That's me, anyway. It's hard to say, really. The teaching situation makes it hard for me too. But after almost a year and a half apart, I think I'll be well in my rights to expect the LDR thing to end (as he would be too!).
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