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Maverick44

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Everything posted by Maverick44

  1. Maverick44
    Just working to let you go.........you're a good woman. It will be ok. I will eventually.
  2. Maverick44
    Here's the deal - Are you a controlling person? Well if you think you're not, then let the person go. If you think you are and you can't deal with them handling themselves, then you are unsure of yourself and you need to deal with that issue. The only person you are ever in control of is yourself. You can watch your gf almost all the time and it will be that one time that you did not that something happens to her. In my mind, i can't stress that much. I think you let her go clubbing and do your things. If she's going to do something, it's going to be whether you voiced your opinion or not. It's ok to feel the way you do but you have to overcome it. Best of luck, Maverick
  3. Maverick44
    Hi romantic, I think he wrote that email and said things the way he said them because he wants to get a reaction out of you. I also think that its working. Its meant to make you think about why you're not together and do what he'd like you to do. I think its manipulative but those my thoughts. Best of luck, Maverick
  4. Maverick44
    Agree with OceanEyes, here. Dude, just do your thing. Why worry about your gf? She's got a social life. When did that become taboo or a bad thing? Live your own social life. After awhile, you'll be having such a blast, you'll be surprised when she tells you she called and wondered where you were at, etc..., probably getting a little jealous herself! Maverick
  5. Maverick44
    Lily, I've read sites similar to this before and I agree 100%. Matter of fact, I had to stop slapping myself silly after awhile because it hurt! I know some ppl might come back and say that it is not right, respectful, etc.... but there are no rules in attraction and that is what this comes out to say. It's when we try creating "rules" that us guys bungle it up so much. Alright, back to the grind..... Maverick
  6. Maverick44
    The words "whip cream and cherries" come to mind........but that might just be me.....Oh, a little chocolate. And be ready like that when he walks into the room....... Hope this doesn't sound too bad but hey, it'd work for me! 8)
  7. Maverick44
    Coming from a guy perspective here - We may care that a person is not availabe for an important day but in the end, we'd understand. It's not like you set this day up while you were with him, right? Though, even then, you'd have had a tough choice to make. I think you do what Scout suggested. Just basically tell him, " I wish I could be there. I want us to go out to ________ as a celebration for you!, etc...." BTW, he might say stuff like......."Nahh, we don't have to do that.....but I think you should kinda surprise him with it anyways" Best of luck! Maverick
  8. Maverick44
    I'd agree with both above in a different way. I agree about not trying too hard. I think you just play it casual and laid-back. Talk to her sometimes, don't talk to her others. Tease her sometimes, other times don't. I like to just kid around with a girl in alot of different ways. For one reason or another that seems to work. However, that's just a natual part of my personality. Some guys can do that whole sweet thing, etc... Yeah, that's not me. I do the more - "Hungry? Let's eat! And hell no we're not eating that sushi stuff you like!" and then we'll go eat sushi! Maverick
  9. Maverick44
    Quite honestly, it really depends on what he sees coming out of it. At 36, he might be looking to settle down. However, I am 28, and am not looking to settle down because I have goals that I would like to accomplish and presently see a relationship as a barrier to that. For that reason, I casually date right now. At my age, the women usually are looking to settle down. While I may hate to generalise, I'd say around 25, women are looking to find the men they will then settle down with. This means that, for me, I usually do look for younger women that I can just casually date while not having to get into serious relationship talks at this time. An ER doctor may want to setup his practice, etc....and could be in either category. Settling or not. If you want something serious with him, give it some time before you broach the subject. Observe his actions and what he says. He'll give it away. Us guys usually do because we don't like to lead people on. I know I don't so I casually mention that I like having them as a friend, etc... Maverick
  10. Maverick44
    I disagree. Look - sometimes you have to be willing to just walk away. How many times can your pride take a hit?? I know you might like this girl but the plain fact is if she was interested in something, she would be receptive. Her actions are speaking here and while it might be nice that she's 'saying' things to your mutual friends, what are her actions telling you? Does it matter that you're 30 and she's 22 and that she might be immature. That's fine, then. But you're not going to be the one to *make* her mature. She has to do that on her own. Maverick
  11. Maverick44
    Do you really want to deal with a flake? My opinion is this - Either she's not interested because she hasn't shown that by calling you or is a flake. She's unreliable. You have to know when a person is unreliable, you stop dealing with them until they come around, right? I don't deal with unreliable people. If she wants you as a friend, she'll call you (and maybe be more reliable). I'm sure you want her as a friend and/or more but its kind've out of your hands when she acts the way she has been, right? Maverick
  12. Maverick44
    It's a double standard. You need to take it slow with this girl. On the rebound, etc. I don't think you should have stopped dating those other girls. Take your time with this girl and don't forget your hobbies. Don't flip out on her. Make your point known by your actions. You've already brought it up. No need to bring it up again. Maverick
  13. Maverick44
    because if she says "No" and he were ever to evaluate/review her, any negative point can be pointed to that and work against him. Just laws in place that would not benefit him.
  14. Maverick44
    Bob, Unfortunately, I feel that you should be very careful in this situation. She is an employee of yours and there are laws which work against you. Attribute it to a bad timing or anything else you would like to (fate of God?) but in the end, walk away. It might not seem like it but yes, there are other women in the world you can be with. You just need to look. I look at it as if you go for this girl and it doesn't work out, your company is in jeopardy. If you want to give ANY type of a hint, I would say something off-handed or throwaway as in "Well, I don' think people in a supervisory position should come onto their employees. It has legal ramifications. I think the subordinate has to make the first move, unfortunately". Sorry but I'd hate to see you have trouble. Maverick
  15. Maverick44
    My belief? You allow yourself to bring drama into your life. Look, if your girl is sneaking around, why is it this guy's fault?? I wouldn't blame him! I'd blame her!!! Now, ppl say, do you know?? Well why is it we can trust women's intuition but not men's? If you feel something is up, maybe something is. I'd keep it in the back of my mind, and if it irked me enough to the point I didn't want to deal with it, walk away. Look dude, looks to me like you care about your gf but the question is, does she care about you? It sounds like you're questioning that. If you have to question that after 5 years, then something is up. Don't blame him, blame her. If you break up with her and she runs to this other guy, it wasn't him, it was her. Be glad you walked away with your head up, your self respect, and a cleansed mind. You can move on knowing that you were a blunt guy who wasn't going to take a girl acting sneaky around you. My 2 cents. Maverick
  16. Maverick44
    Look - I know how it is to be a little shy. Been there, done that. I don't know of too many guys who like rejection. BUT - dude, you need to just talk. I really think it comes down to a couple of things: 1. Putting your eggs all in one basket (This girl is the be all, end all of something). 2. Confidence Personally, I think what you need to do is talk to with her and don't put so much pressure on yourself. Just chat with her, see where it goes. BUT I also think you should talk with other girls. Now, mind you, some people might disagree with me and say you're playing the field, etc...I guess I think you're a bachelor and you're entitled to date a few different ppl at a time. I think by doing that, you keep your options open, don't focus on solely just one being "the one", and eventually, if a great girl comes out of those that you date, you'll have a bit more confidence in dealing with her because of your experiences. Good Luck! Maverick
  17. Maverick44
    I'm going to clarify Tpysi's position. Most guys do look at porn. If we really need to go pull out the statistics on this, it can be done. It's something "most" guys do. Also, it really isn't that big of a deal. Some guys do take it too far, though. If you're addicted to it, then it's a bad thing, just as with anything else. Maverick
  18. Maverick44
    Best way for a girl to confront me with a problem is if she has a six-pack of Heinekens with her when she does. Nawww - just teasing. I think you just say something along the lines of "You sure nothing is wrong? " When he says "Yeah" Leave it at that. Say "Ok". "Feels like you're wigging out or something sometimes. Know that I'm here to support you but I don't like being treated crappy - so cut it out at least" Seriously, you don't deserve to be treated like crap. What's better? Him around treating you like crap or him being alone and working out his issues? I know you'd like to help him solve his issues but maybe these are issues he needs to fix on his own. Best of luck, Maverick
  19. Maverick44
    I don't know if X's have that much signifiance anymore. I think it means he just cares about you. If they really wanted to be back with you, they'd come chasing, right?
  20. Maverick44
    Of course you don't really want anyone else. We've all been there. We want the person who broke up with us or we at least did want that person. BUT - what are you going to do? Wait around forever? Man, look, she broke up with you. What are you supposed to do? You're not supposed to be waiting for her. I dont know about you but for me 18 days wasn't enough time to get over my ex. I still haven't spoken with her about 11 months. I miss her, think about her, etc... Do I want to be with her? Good question. Couldn't answer that. Go work on yourself, some hobbies, etc.....Don't you all play cricket or something in England?? Maverick
  21. Maverick44
    You know, girls are a funny thing. My experience has been that I can say something to them or even send something via email but they tend to like something like a card that was bought for them. It's simple but I think they like the thought that goes into it. I'd still say just send the card. Keep it a light card and just wishing her encouragement and that she can talk to you. Don't be too romantic in it. Just keep it light. If you think you can flirt with her within the card, you can try that but keep it light and funny if you can. Best of luck, Maverick
  22. Maverick44
    You know - if you look through all the posts on this website about talking to people, it advocates usually that "YOU" should talk to such and such a person and let them know how you feel, etc.. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I don't. However, looking at your story, I think this girl came out to you! She is trying to communicate to you that she wants you back in her life. Now, the situation is this, do you want her back in your life? Or will it cause you more drama/grief? Take some time to think about it. Come to a conclusion and then when you do, if you decide you want her back, suggest that the two of you do what girls do, mall shopping one day and see how that goes, eh? If you decide you don't, then just IM her at some point and say that you're bummed too but you can't deal with this situation right now in your life. Hopefully, she'll understand. Best of luck, Maverick
  23. Maverick44
    Personally, I wouldn't do flowers at all right now. You just went out on a date with her and yes, she's dealing with a death right now but I don't know - just not flowers yet, you know? However, I would send a card via mail to either her home or work address. An encouragement or something along those lines. Just keep it light and friendly. See how things develop. Best of luck, Maverick
  24. Maverick44
    Hi ggm, I'm sorry you went through this. Unfortunately, you probably hit it right on the head. He is afraid of commitment. Maybe he had been hurt in the past? I know for me, I am afraid of commitment right now. There is this girl that wants to date me but I keep it on a friendship level because I just don't think I'm ready. I hate the idea of leading her on but I've dropped "hints" about other guys and that she'll find a good one someday, etc... I don't know if she's gotten them because she seems to want to be around me. To be honest, I question when or if I will be ready for a commited relationship again. I've kinda got myself on this thing where I like where I'm at and I like being a bachelor. At one point I saw myself married and having the "normal" life but even when I meet amazing women, I don't think I want to settle down anymore. I guess it's my commitment problem and a little fear about going through that all over again. You asked for hints and I can offer the following: A guy who is not into committing will: 1. Probably drop hints 2. Will not be the guy who calls you once a day or every other day. 3. Is not into having those heart-to-heart conversations. I kinda speak from experience on this because I do drop hints. I may want to call a girl too and talk to her every day or so but I will not let myself or I'll keep it superficial. I try to avoid the heart-to-heart convo's also. The serious ones that draw ppl closer. You say yourself that you knew he was a terminal bachelor. In a way, that was a hint, right? But then again, any guy who is single is a bachelor.... I hope this helps. I know it's a little jumbled. I think your post resonated with me. Maverick
  25. Maverick44
    I agree with S4D. Why not tell her to leave a certain weekend open in the month. Then, depending on where you live, book a hotel stay at a really pleasurable place. In Southern California, ppl like to go to Santa Barbara or to Palm Springs. Palm Springs is really hot this time of year so that's not great. OR, maybe Vegas? Something out of the blue and surprise her. Don't tell her what the weekend is for. Just tell her to save it for you and then go do it. It'd be better if you didn't have to tell her to save the weekend but you never know what she might plan. Good Luck, Maverick
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