emptychipbag

You could either continue looking for what you want or, like a lot of people, just settle for whatever you can get and hope it turns out okay. I would recommend becoming a loner if the failure to find a girl starts to make you depressed. But I don't know if someone can just become a loner,.. or if it's wired in their brain from years of social isolation and ineptitude.

I just turned 26 and I've never left home. I've had the same job for 5 years and it pays well I guess. I have no idea if I could afford to live on my own. I don't have any friends,.. so the roommate idea is out. I don't have any plans to move out, actually. I never wanted to go to college because I don't want to "be anything". I'm not a goal oriented person. I'm just trying to enjoy life with as little effort and stress as possible until I die. (and I hope that happens before I turn 30)

Being alone forever really isn't that bad. I've never had a girlfriend and I probebly never will and I'm a loner anyway so it doesn't bother me much. Best of all,.. I don't have to be self consious about my body because the only person that will ever see me naked is a coroner! my advice is to just enjoy being alone and don't even try.

me too. Every girl that I get to know and like I find out through someone else that she's got a boyfriend or husband or fiance'. I've also noticed that the only girls that are attracted to me are the ones I don't like.

I thought Catcher in The Rye was "inspiring".

Porn isn't a guaranteed addiction. Simply doing something regularly is not an addiction. (this same thing is true about masturbation.) You can only cheat on a significant other with another person,.. not a video or magazine.

This has always happened to me ever since forever. Even on the phone. Way back in the early 90's I had a good friend who had moved to another city and the only way for us to communicate was by writing letters. I always had lots to say and an average letter from me was around one page front and back. But when they replied an average letter from them was only a few sentences. And they usually never answered any questions if i asked them. The letters they would send me would read like they didn't even read my letters. And ever since I started e-mailing people in high-school,.. I always would have several paragraphs on various topics that I knew where of interest and they would either not reply until a couple of months later and only write a couple of sentences. Someone in this topic said that e-mail isn't used for actual conversation,.. but just for "keeping in touch". If that's the truth then what a freakin' waste of technology. We might as well be using smoke signals if all we're going to use our instant communication for is "hi, lol lol lol lol lol LOL L-O-freakin' L!!!!) But also,.. even when I would talk to friends on the phone I would be the only one with any thing to say or any kind of opinion,.. and that would be when they called me!! That's ironic because if I'm talking to people in person I'm very quiet.

I do nothing but play games and watch dvds now. I used to spend most of my time drawing and writing and making comic books for fun and it was also my life goal to be a pubished comic artist,.... (i had been drawing and writing and making comics since I was about 10 years old and I'm 25 now.) But I've lost all interest in doing anything artistic now. Of course that's because my life dream has been shredded by general disinterest in the comic book medium. All I wanted to do was creater owned stuff,... and there's no market for that stuff anymore. Even Marvel and DC comics only sell about 10% of what they used to. So now my art desk has a computer on it and I just play games and stuff. I don't feel guilty about playing games. I do miss that life goal that I had and the enthusiasm and the fun I had being creative and making comics,...

Ha ha.... Every girl I'm ever attracted to has a boyfriend. So I don't even bother anymore since their all taken 99% of the time.

I'm one of those nice guys and I talk to girls that I meet all the time. I just can't tell at all if they're interested or not. I'm completely clueless and dumb when it comes to all that. I just don't have the energy to act a certain way other than how I naturally am in order to fool a girl into liking me.

Porn is like chocolate. Even if someone is in a relationship and has access to sex with their partner,.. why wouldn't they still like porn? Just because someone has a partner doesn't mean that they won't feel like masturbating sometimes either. It's all normal,.. depending on how conservative and religious/superstitious they are.

Dude,... I'm 25 and I'm constantly living in the past all the time. I actually still look 18 or 19 (that's what people tell me) plus I still dress and act and do the things that 18 year olds do. I very strongly miss my teen years. I'm always daydreaming about them and reliving memories. I'm only 5 years away from being 30!! Now that's scary! I can't imagine even being that old! I don't ever want to be that old! I wish I had videotaped most of my teen years and I'd be re-watching them over and over as that would be the closest thing to a time machine I could get. I was a teen in the 90's and that was a decade of euphoric bliss and joy that I don't think I'll ever experience again. And part of it was because I was a teen with no obligations or responsibility and with dreams and goals and I was able to just have fun and enjoy life. (plus the state of the world was much better back then too,.. and the US economy was booming and things were expanding and everything was exciting and I was discovering new things and I had not a worry in the world.) But you're still 18!! You still have one year of your teens left (not including the rest of your 18th year.) You need to spend some time having fun and doing some crazy things!

I'm a 25 year old guy and I can relate to you. Except that I've recently been having conversations with women I'm interested in and I'm getting much better at talking to them and not being nervous and pent up. But I still can't manage to try to initiate dates or even phone number exchanges,.. partially because I'm a loner who really can't be comfortable unless I'm physically alone in an area by myself. So although I'd love to have a romantic relationship with a woman,.. my loner nature would ruin it. But just realize that there are guys out there just like you.

The one time I was rejected,.. (because it was the one chance I had to have a girlfriend) it was especially confusing because she didn't just tell me I wasn't her type or whatever,.. instead we made plans for another date and she promptly cut off contact afterwards. (which I think is even more hurtful because I wasn't even worth being told that it wouldn't work?) I had to not do anything that reminded me of her,.. in order to get over it. That was hard because lots of stuff reminded me of her. I basically had to do new things and keep my mind occupied.

The question really isn't specific enough. You seem to be an over achiever,.. which can be good in a career and with goals,... but it also means that you're never satisfied, which can lead to feelings of being unfulfilled in life no matter how hard you try. Me,.. I'm not ambitious at all. I have no goals or plans. I give up on everything at the first sign of difficulty. Completely unsatisfied and unfulfilled with life. So are you unhappy because you set your own goals too high?

I know I'm not. Even if I do meet a girl that I like I know she wouldn't care for a 25 year old who lives with his parents and doesn't have any goals in life. I don't even care about trying to find a higher paying job. If I did move out right now I'd be in poverty. But I don't even care. I don't have the energy or willpower to improve my life to a state where I would even be desirable. I'm actually sort of content with having no future now. My attitude is, "whatever happens, happens." I'm the kind of person that doesn't care what the weather will be like tomorrow.

Do they sell confidence in pill form yet, 'cause I'd so be buying that.

You would only be a terrible person if you did terrible things. Thinking "bad" things doesn't make anyone bad. Wishing secretly that someone would die isn't even bad. Saying "I hope you/someone else dies." IS bad. But you could think it all you want. The mind is the only place people have true freedom. There isn't any right or wrong in thought. It's all in your actions and behavior. Lets turn it around here. Lets say you constantly wished the best for everyone and that everyone would be happy and that no one would starve or be in poverty. But if you didn't give to charity or help anyone in any way, your generous thoughts alone wouldn't mean that you were a generous person. In other words,.. think whatever you want and don't feel guilty. Only feel like a horrible person if you act like a horrible person.

In my life I rarely see any girls that I can even meet. None at work. Of course none at home. I don't go out much. I don't have any friends to introduce me to any girls. I had a chance last December and totally blew it with a girl I really really liked. It was total luck that we even tried to get to know each other because my dad set us up. But in the end she didn't like me. We never even had an official date or anything before she decided to break off contact. She didn't tell me "this won't work" or ANYTHING. It ended so weird. We made plans to see each other a third time and she promised to call me the day before and that was the last I heard from her. I've tried calling but either no answer or she's not there. Just being forgotten and dropped like that really sucks. And people are like, "so what,.. there's lots of other women for you to meet." But there ISN'T!!! That was the ONLY chance I've had to even have a girlfriend in YEARS. So it was devistating because it'll probebly be another 5 years before I meet a girl again.

I think a lot of guys are being raised with feminist ideals so they end up being as you described. They try to be sensitive to her needs and her happiness is all that is important. Which according to you just ends up getting you dumped because no girl wants a wimpy boyfriend. It's seen as a social stereotype that women like jerks for sex, and nice guys for long term relationships. I try to have a balance of being nice and being my self. I do guy things,.. but I also wouldn't want to ignore a womans needs either. I consider myself out of the game. I don't go out and try to meet girls. I just go to work and then spend my spare time at home playing videogames or something. I've pretty much lost all desire to have any kind of relationship; serious or sexual. At least if you're a hermit loner misanthrope you can relax.

Oh I've tried to be positive. And I just end up feeling embarrassed like I've been lying to myself. I've sort of already realized that I was meant to be alone. And that does get really depressing because I've become kind of exhausted with material things and just want to be with someone. I've lost interest in the hobbies I used to love and just feel like a lump of flesh waiting to get old and die or something.

I was sort of speaking in general. lol.

......this is the kind of crap that scares me away from even trying to find a girlfriend. I'm too sincere to play all these stupid games. What is wrong with people?

I have no idea what's wrong with those guys. When I like a girl,... I actually really like her and want to be with her and have fun with her and stuff. Maybe they had ulterior motives? I think that maybe these guys had last minute "blind-date" panic attacks or something. There is a stereotype of dating sites being used mostly by people who are desperate, and maybe their friends were making fun of them or something for trying to get a date on the internet. I'm as confused as you.

I totally fit the description of a "pure loner". I know how I turned into one too. I remember up until about 3rd grade I had warts all over my hands up to my elbows. I was a total freak and all the other kids treated me like I was diseased and would stay away because they thought it was contageous. I would have kids staring at me and giving moans of disgust and stuff all the time. So at that early age I was already self consious and didn't want to be seen. I had managed to make maybe one or two friends at best,.. but eventually they would stop hanging out with me because people would tell them they would get what I had. I remember I used to always stab and cut the warts until they bled with a pencil or pen because they were causing me so much shame. I do remember the warts all went away over night one night, but that didn't matter anymore. Because of the low self-esteem I had developed I turned into an easy target for bullies. I never fought back because if you did, you'd get in as much trouble as the bully. So in order to stay out of trouble I'd just let them hurt me. I remember getting beat up was almost a daily thing and I couldn't do anything about it but try to disappear and hide. Other kids would make fun of me for getting beat up,.. I'd go to a teacher and they'd actually talk to me with a dismissive attitude about it,.. like I was just supposed to just get over it or something. Like I was being a whiny baby or something. So basically I didn't trust people. I thought all people were cruel. I was ashamed of myself. I never developed important social skills at that early age. I would always be nervous around people because I always felt that I was being stared at and ridiculed and laughed at. I avoided drawing attention to myself because I ALWAYS felt like I was a worthless freak. It wasn't until high school that I started to open up just a little. But in highschool I was still a target. By that time I had it down to an art. I had trained myself to just take it and not feel anything. Hell,.. I almost felt like a martyr or something half the time. I'd walk around with bruises proudly and smile and laugh when I was being harassed. The rougher they'd get,.. they more I'd laugh. If I got a busted lip or if a few spots of blood got on my shirt,.. I'd leave it there. And no,.. no faculty ever seemed to care. Everyone knew what was happening,.. or everyone was just ignoring it,.. or they were all just incredibly stupid. But I graduated damn it. All without going on a killing spree or anything. yay me. (I'm a pacifist.) And now I'm so totally starved for all the social stuff I missed out on.