emma34

now that's one bad attitude dude...not getting a valentine doesn't make you unattractive - and if your friends say your hot...believe them. All that really matters is what you think anyways, so don't look to other to reassure that your beautiful and worthwile, deep down you know you are already!! Believe me, I'm not getting a valentine this year either, and I'm not too worried, because you know what my theory is? When your not ready or looking for love, you'll find it, but when your constantly waiting for a man to fall for you, it'll never happen. Wouldn't it be nice if valentine's day was as romantic as we fantasize it should be? Keep your chin up, valentine's day is scam anyway. =)

i think valentines day gifts are ALWAYS a good thing...even from friends. it depends what kind of girl she is i think on this one, and how you have acted towards her. i'm thinkin a gift maybe a little less traditional boyfriend/girlfriend. hmmm - like a little teddy bear....i dunno - i can't think of anything at this moment, but something personal would be best of course.

heres' my opinion...trim it.

honestly - as the recipient of a promise at age 17, i would advice not to give one so young. it's a beautiful trhing to promise your love to someone, but you have your whole life ahead of you...no need to do it so early in a relationship. wait at least a couple of years.

keep your chin up. things DO get better out of my high school - in ever single away...don't worry.

well - my opinion is more towards a charachter flaw. I am the cheater - I have gone out with perfect man, and still cheated. From my perspective, it is a need for constant affection...not necessarily affection, but for a man (or a woman) to WANT them. When I was with my boyfriend I was completely in love with him, but the second we were apart, I needed someone elses affection to get me by. Post me if you have any more questions as this is a little brief - personal experiene with cheaters?

well i'm not sure if your looking for a woman's perspective - but heres mine anyway. Initially - I always look at people shallowly ( i will admit this ) but it doesn't last. The way I look at it, in a way, it's a good thing (and i don't mean to sugercoat for you) cause it weeds out all the superficial jerks that want you for one thing, and who are just shallow...cause I do believe there are ppl who'll want you for one thing, even for the rest of their lives, and that would not be cool. In another light, sure you might not get as many dates, but that's understandable. ppl our age (i'm 18) - all they think about is sex, whether it's subcousciously or not...so if they see someone skinny and blonde and all that superficial crap they're drawn to it. But if your asking do they 'yuck' out? No way. I feel like your wanting someone to tell you 'your fat and no one will like you' to verify your own thoughts, but it's not true. It truly is personality that matters, and the older you get, the more everyone will understand this. Besides, looks fade anyway, right? Think of it this way - would you yuck out if you saw a guy a few pounds overweight?

I know how you feel and I think this is a common thing actually. I broke up with my boyfriend and I live in a small town so there is no one around I could even consider dating, so I'm so anxious to go to university next year because maybe finally I will meet some new people. Keep trying, don't get down on yourself. You a one-person-person as I would call it...likes to hang out with their best friend instead of 10 okay friends kinda deal. Everything will change when you get to university, but remember that you have to live in the present, now. Try hanging out with ppl in your grade that you wouldn't normally hang out with. I'm sure other ppl in your grade are feeling the same kind of effects. Grade 12 can be a stressful year, not just academically. Keep your chin up, and put yourself out there. I'm sure you'll do great.

yoga...you can't help but feel completely light and stressless after yoga. Any form of excersise really. But if I'm feeling really tired and don't feel like I have that kind of energy...loud, hip hop music goes on, and then I have energy to do anything. Likely dance around the house lol. When no one is home, my house is a constant dance party, just for me. It's very uplifting.

yes i would be bothered. What he SHOULD have done was came up with someone to tell you - like that they are friends and have always be intersted in that kind of music or something. Tell him it was kind of uncomfortable with all his ex's there, and you trust him, but you just don't like it. Hopefully he understands and will stop inviting his ex's to his gigs...but if he gets defensive when you ask him about it, then tell him your not accusing him of anything, but he should be able to understand where you are coming from. He should.

well when it comes to anal sex - for some people, ya just shouldn't do it. My boyfriend and I had a similar situation about a year ago. He really enjoyed it, and I did as well, but because of the "taboo" of it all, and the physical uncomfortableness, we only did it a few times. If you really want to try it again, my advice would be to lube lube lube. As for the smell, I've never had that problem, but there's not much you can do about that. It might not be like that everytime. It's one of those things where it's never as good as you thought it would be. Get him to use his fingers for a long time first before getting into it as well. As for the breath: well, you've got enough advice about that. Good luck.

I feel your pain...since most of my friends seem to be in blissful love right now ( it is rather annoying ), I think I'll probably stay home and drink myself to sleep...lol. Desperately try to recruit other lonely friends. I was thinking I would send myself flowers just as a little gag/to make me smile...but i'm not sure if i would smile and then possibly cry - so i doubt I'll do that now. That and my friends would cringe at my self-pity. My advice - be nonchalant and bitter. That's what I'm doing. Valentines Day sucks, and those losers don't know what they're missing sitting home alone!

I need advice/just to vent...it seems right now that nobody in the world could possibly be experiencing as much pain as I have had to go through in the last three months. Yet, I was the one who broke it off with my boyfriend, whom I had planned to marry, so added guilt for the fact that I know my ex is feeling more or at least as much pain, although he has delt with it much quicker. I just don't know what to do with myself. Every moment that goes by, my thoughts are completely consumed with debate about whether or not I should reconcile with my ex. Deep down I know I could never spend the rest of my life with him, but I am utterly lonely, and certain qualities (being needy and basically basing his life around me) that he had, are looking very attractive. I need some sort of guidance...some sort of hope. My question is: right now my thoery is that you never really stop feeling lonely and sad from a break up until someone else fills that void - whether it be a month or two years...yanno. Once you've tasted love, you really can't be without it. Is this true? I've only truly been in love once, and I feel that right now the only way I could ever become fulfilled again is with a new man, that would have to be better than my ex. And if please anyone could give me some advice as to how I should recover from this kind of thing. And how long am I going to feel this way?

my fetish: mine involved chili, tim hortons donuts, a dirty old sock, and a baseall bat...you can put that together you pervert.

boyfriend and I haven't been together that long but he is very persistent in the fact that he wants me to reach orgasm. With past boyfriend, I have found there is really only way to do this other than oral sex, and that is playing with myself during sex. For my ex, it turned him on, so it worked well. But with new boyfriend - not comfortable to do this in front of him yet - took over a year to feel comfortable enough to do it with ex.. Should I bother even telling him that this is how I get off?

so basically I cannot STAND my new boyfriends best friend. before - we were all friends, my now boyfriend, his friend, his friends girlfriend...we all got along great. but now that i get to know both his friend and his friends girlfriend, i absoloutely HATE them. I cannot stand being around them, and they constantly gossip and talk behind my back, as I know they do about other people as well. They constantly fight, and my boyfriend always ends up in the middle because they always look to him to be tell them they are right, which they never are because they fight about the stupidest things, and always cause huge scenes and involve everybody... It has come to the point where I can hardly go out with them. And his friend is always drunk and getting hard into drugs which I know my boyfriend disproves of, but won't say anything because he acts like a pushover a lot of the time towards him. At first I could handle it, but my boyfriends bestfriends girlfriend (sorry to get confusing) is always coming to me saying 'why do I bother going out with him...I can't stand him' and all I can think is that I shouldn't get involved - but instead I tell her what I think she wants to hear... and instead of just being thankful for someone to talk to she takes everything I say turns it around and tells her boyfriend (my boyfriends bestfriend) that I was talking about him. It's all very 'high school drama' that I do not enjoy - and my boyfriend is usually fairly neutral on the whole subject...but he really likes to do the whole 'double-date' thing and I'm thinking I will now refuse to do anything with them anymore, and I'm afraid his best friend is infecting his mind with bad things about me. Should I tell him that I hate his best friend and his best friends girlfriend? Because I am afraid that would be insulting, especially since we have only been together for about a month and it's really not my place.. But I now know that I CANNOT stick it out any longer. I like this guy, but I'm afraid that I may have to break up with him beacuse of the company he keeps. Also, since we have just started going out it's much more comfortable when we get together as a group...I don't know what to do. But then again, I usually end up getting annoyed with him his friend, which thereforeeee puts me in a negative mood towards boyfriend.

Yes he has got the letter and we are officially broken up. p.s. agreed - good system.

I don't want to be with him ever. There are many reasons...1) he is a pathological liar 2) I am moving away to school, and becoming successful where he has been living with his parents and working in some 'plant' for the last three years...not very ambitious vs. me very ambitious. 3) Drugs/Alcohol problem Plus various other reasons..

Two months had passed since I broke up with my boyfriend...everything seemed to be going fairly smoothly, although I knew that he was still falling apart inside - he was completely heartbroken. This past weeked I called him to talk, as we have called eachother a few times just to see how we are doing...but everytime it seems he is begging me to do something with him, thereforeeee I am usually very distant. But anyway this weekend I was vulnerable and weak, and lonlely, and I called him to see if he wanted to go for a drink. He was busy, but instead he asked if he could come over the next day for a movie, and I obliged. In the back of my mind I thought, 'maybe we should get back tgether...i'm in a lot of pain for no reasn'. But the fact that I knew it would be toying with his emotions to get too close to him held me back. The last thing I want is to hurt him again. He took me out on a beautiful date, and we were having a drink, talking, when we started discussing our questionable future... I told him how I was confused and that I couldn't make the decision to come back, although it would be the easiest. I felt awful because here he was taking me out, when i am continuing to turn him down. He was my ride home, so when he got upset and walked out of the lounge, I followed. He was extremely emotional, but after explaining mself for 10 minutes, I suddenly had an emotional breakdown. I had held it all in, because everyone expected I should be content without him, since I was the one that broke up with him, but it was never my intent, and he was the one who broke my heart by lieing over and over to me. He conforted me, which made things worse because, I was experiencing overwhelming guilt. I tried my best to explain my thoughts, but he was so focused on having me back, he did not even try to attempt to understand. So in the end, I took him back, and he was ecstatic. I knew the second I did it, that it was the wrong choice, but it made him so happy. The next day I was totally depressed and decided i had to do something about it, so I talked to my counsellor and eventually decided I should write him a letter - because the emotion between us becomes too high when we talk face to face. I explained how I had been impulsive, etc. I just don't understand why he won't at least TRY to understand why we can't be together. He is so focused on havig me back, and he won't leave me alone. I realize that I made a huge mistake by taking him back because of guilt, but we both need to move on...the thing is, he's so convinced that I am just 'going thru smething right now' and will eventually come back to him. I have valid reasons. Why won't he understand? What can I do to help him?

That's a really scary thought actually - for those of us who are trying to get OVER the ex...what ur saying, and i could see this, is that person will always been in your heart. Looks like there's no hope for me then.

Well if it makes you feel any better - you are not alone. There are so many ppl right now who are feeling completely hopeless about ending a relationship, and don't know how to keep living without that person. But believe me, it gets better. I have been where you have been. This is the way I look at, my ex and I have been broken up for two months now - and for the first while he was never off my mind, and then after a few weeks, I only cried every once in a while, and now I still think of him often, but not always, and thing are progressively getting better. It's a slow, painful process, but it's worth every minute. One day you will be able to look back at the relationship and learn from it - instead of regretting it. Just remember - it gets better. It takes time, but trust me, it's not worth it to stay with a man who will eventually hurt you again anyway.

well - theres not much u can do about thsi kind of thing, except for replacing that habit (which is basically what it is) with something else. when i get the "munchies" but i know i've had too much to eat already...i eat celery..because its basically just water anyway. i know it sounds stupid, but you could eat celery all day and lose weight from chewing it lol. sorry to joke. but yeh - thats what i think, or try to avoid the times when u normally snack. like if u eat while ur bored, or in front of the TV..find something to do that will at least get you moving and ur mind off of food. like cleaning, or working out, or reading..that works. hope i helped.

Pure bliss - for at least a few brief moments anyway. It takes over the enitire body and all u can do is focus directly on that feeling. the first couple of time i had an orgasm i guess u could say i "cummed" (fluid)...but it doesn't happen anymore.

this is a tough call...if any girl needs time to decide whether or not she can be faithful to you - thats sort of a bad sign. but if ur really wantnig to get her back and make it work with her, i think you are doing the right thing with no contact. she has to want you back. u should make her miss you. but if u do get back together -be very cautious of a girl like this.

So I have been "seeing" this guy for almost a month now. We spent new years eve together, and for our holidays, we spent almost every day together, granted other friends were there, we were obviously together. At first I was completely okay with us having no official title, and I didn't want to rush anything, and I think he felt the same way. One night at a party I was sitting on another guy's lap, not for any real reason, just because there was nowhere else to sit, and we are good friends, although I know he is attracted to me. The next I found out this guy I am seeing was very jealous about that, which I didn't really understand. He decided not to come over or call me that night even though we had plans. When he eventually showed up at like 11:30 at night, I made it very clear that he was wasting my time, and that i'm not the kind of girl that just sits around waiting for her man to come home. I've been asked out at least three times since we've been together, I stopped seeing two people, and I turned down someone whom I had had a crush on for several years. I feel like I have sacrificed a little for this guy, and I felt like he was disrespecting me. Once he told me he was jealous, I was a bit disgusted with him, so I became very straight forward. "Do you even care?" I asked - he said yes..and I asked "are we together" and he said "do you want to be?" and i said "you hold all the cards here' - and he said "yes". After that we "made up". He told me that he wasn't used to this (he's never really had a real girlfriend, but I've been in a very serious relationship before). We talked on the phone a couple of times this week, we go to school together, but we are trying to keep this under wraps, so we don't talk to eachother very often. This weekend he has been busy with work, etc. I have been out at parties, and both nights he has called the party to talk to me, just to talk. It seems a little odd, but I don't mind. A couple of weeks ago he gave me a teddy bear - and I contemplated whether he just wanted me for sex, but HE is the one who never wants to do it, so that's not it. Last night when I talked to him, he made plans with me for tonight. Tonight i call to confirm, i ask what time "whatever you want"...i ask if he still wants me to come "whatever...doesn't matter", does he want me to bring friends.."up to you, whatever's cool". This was very frustrating so eventualy I said "obviously you sound like you have something beter to do, so I guess I'll let you go". He said he would call me tomorrow, although I don't know why. His best friend is my friends boyfriend, and hes' a real jerk who ditches and never calls my friend... I'm thinking it's possible he has just learned to be this way - because of his friend. But I am rather confused. This is pointless to me, because I should be out dating, not being left home alone on a Saturday night. I just got out of a serious relationship a few months ago, and I can't really stand to be at home alone too much, and all my friends had made plans thinking I would not be available. Should I give this guy an altimatum "all or nothing"...or should I just tell him I don't want to be screwed around with? I have NO CLUE of what hes thinking, and its driving me crazy...