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About Me

  1. I should have seen the writing on the wall, but my ex gf called me on a tuesday to end things, and I saw her out holding hands with another guy on a thursday. I even found out that she spent the weekend with him that same weekend!!!! Obviously, she already had him waitng for her. Anyway, it's been about four weeks, and i've seen them out a few times since then. But I didn't say a word to either of them, and i was very nice to my mutual friends of my ex when i saw them out the same night. In other words, i was acting very cool, and i noticed how her new man was always looking over at me - I could tell he was not comfortable. Anyway, I've been doing NC, and have been doing good, but I feel like writing her a letter to tell her how awful she was to do this, etc. and just tell her how i feel. Is this a bad idea?
  2. Hey everyone, This might sound vague, but there's this guy in my class. He's not the hottest guy in the world, but he's very cute and sweet [to his friends]. Today, we had club sign-ups and I had candy for everyone who joined. I brought the candy to class and EVERYONE wanted some. Being the nice person I am, , I gave in. Then, the guy in my class wanted one too. He didn't act like he didn't know me. So that was a good thing. By the way, I got to a religious school, so we pray and stuff. During religion, we were going to pray for our churches and stuff, and my friend thought it was a good idea for everyone to hold hands. Yes, it might sound ridiculous, but I was kind of shy to hold his hand. Weird. I know. But you have NO idea of how shy I was. Well, we held hands. His hands were so warm and tender. *sigh* I wasn't nervous or anything; suprisingly, I was calm and normal. We held hands and then started to pray, and my hand was in his. Then, he got an "itch" on his face or something, and was still holding my hand, lifted it up to his face and scratched his face. I kind of gave a weird look, and HIS [girl] friend saw and gave me this look like "Ooo la la." It wasn't a bad look, just a look like "oh they're so cute." And then, during the prayer, he held my hand tighter. I wanted to hold his hand tighter, too, but I figured he would feel weird. He started to loosen his hand towards the end though. Well, I think I like him now. I want to talk to him, but I'm afraid. I looked on his blogger, and apparently he HAS a girlfriend. I was so disappointed. What do I do??? Should I just forget about him? Or what?
  3. NO NEED TO RESPOND, JUST WANTED TO LET YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE DECIDED FOR ME. Aloha to all. After a couple of days of being in the forum and having read a lot of posts by a lot of guys who are LONGING for and PINING for and MISSING and LOVING someone in their life...I have to say I am amazed at how many of you there are that are caring enough to take the time to post on the forum. So my answer is this: I have not paid attention to the right guys that I have met. Like a lot of women, I've gone for the one that I shouldn't be with (ie. too old, too stupid, too immature, not funny, already in relationships!). And, the ones that would take the time to post on this forum are the ones that I skipped over (the guy in college that told me he loved me and I didn't know enough to not let him go, the one that held my hand when I got dumped, the one that tells me I deserve more than what I have let myself settle for). **So, to all of the guys that are cool enough to post on this forum-you deserve better, trust me. **And to all of the girls who shut down those guys (I say this to myself too), you missed out. I know I have missed out on a couple of guys that would've been awesome... But, life wouldn't be any fun if we didn't get to make mistakes and learn from them, now would it?
  4. Just kind of a weird question... I'm on the girls varsity soccer team at my high school. Yesterday we had a home game, so most of our girls team stayed to watch the boys play right after us. Well, I was watching the guy I know best on the boys team and I found myself wondering if I liked him. Flash forward to nighttime. I had a strange dream about him last night. He held my hand, smiled at me, called me beautiful, and almost kissed me. I was just wondering if there was like any connection here? Because yesterday was the first time I found myself wondering if I liked this dude, and suddenly that night I had a dream about him....Could this just be my mind plotting out some wishful thinking?
  5. Hey Guys/Gals, I’m just seeking some advice on some sort of dilemma happening at the moment. I was just out on a date with a girl two days ago and everything was great We were catching a movie at the cinema and we were holding hands, the usual. I had never kissed her before and towards the end of the movie she was leaning on my shoulder and we kissed. It was nice because it felt right, but immediately afterwards I felt as though the whole thing was quite anti-climactic. I kinda got this sense of…. “What now?”. I can’t seem to phrase what it was like. I felt as though I had done something wrong and that I shouldn’t see her again. I felt that I had forced the whole thing and that we shouldn’t have kissed at all. This feeling was so bad that when I got home that night I felt like I should tell her that we shouldn’t see each other again… Does anyone know if this is AT ALL a natural thing I should be experiencing? I’m really confused… I was excited about going out with her. But now I don’t know how I’m going to react the next time I see her. I’m guessing that it’ll only be negatively and I really don’t want that. The only thing I can boil it down too is maybe the whole was rushed and now it feels awkward and somewhat incomplete. Please if at all possible can you give me your opinion on the situation? Anything at all would be welcome. Thanks.
  6. I'm seventeen, a junior in high school, come from a town of about 6,000, and need some excitement. I have never had a boyfriend over six weeks because I get bored really fast. I also have only ever held hands with a boy. That is it. I need excitement in my life, and I would love to find that with a nice boy. But I don't exactly know where to look or what to look for. I need tips. Anything I can do to attract excitement, a new look maybe? I don't know. A little help would be nice!
  7. hey guy/gals i am just looking for some new ideas when it comes to holding hands/each other when walking. Dont get me wrong the good old fashioned hand in hand is great lol but just to change stuff up a bit and make it more interesting
  8. Okay. When its just me and this girl alone together she will be flirting with me and we'll be close and pretty much all over each other(not making out just flirtin and playin around).When we are with other people she will just distance herself and actually get a little violent. For instance we went to a movie with 3 other people on Saturday. We sit with them but we ended up bein all over each other and flirtin a lot and everything. We sat on the top roll and had the arm folded up so we could be close and stuff. Well when we leave the movie she doesnt walk with me or anything.She walks ahead of me and when i made a smart comment she came up and slapped me hard.We would always play fight and stuff even when we are alone but when we arent she will actually hurt me.Im not sure if shes looking for me to wrap her up to stop her from hittin me or to hold her hands or something or if she is tryin to distance herself and seem like she doesnt care about me. Also when we talk on msn we will usually both be nice and sweet.Its just when we are around a lot of people.So what should i do? Try to be distant or take what she is doing as playful?
  9. ive been with this girl for a little over a year and since sept 03, i ended things with her because of all the arguments we got into. most of the arguments happened because of her actions with her guys friends that made me insecure. all ive ever asked of her was to be honest with me, dont lie to me, and understand where im coming from. from sept 03 to 3 weeks ago, we still acted like bf/gf. we hugged, kissed, etc etc. sometimes we would still have arguments over her guy friends in which she sees nothing wrong with. its not that i think she slept with anyone of them, but its just sometimes her being with or going out with her guy friends....im uncomfortable and she never understands. she always says sorry and shell do things differently, but then it happens again...and again. it becomes upsetting to me because of the simple things i ask her...she doesnt try to understand where im coming from. im sure some of you will say its me being insecure and it may be my fault, but get this. when i reverse the role on her and ask her if she were in my shoes, would she feel the same way. guess what...she says maybe, probably, or i dont know...which to me...means YES!!! anyhow, ive been trying to work things out with her. its been 3 weeks since ive been trying, but i guess to her...she says she isnt feeling it anymore. she says she still loves me and cares for me, but isnt in love anymore and hasnt been happy for a while. over the past 3 weeks, ive seen her only twice. shes been telling me to give her time and space and that she will date other people. the thing is...i know of the issues that we had in our relationship...it was more communication than anything. it wasnt like we cheated on each other or were werent still there for each other. things have been on and off for the past 5 months, but my heart and feelings have always been with her. i know she isnt perfect and i know im far from it as well. there are things i could have done differently and with her as well. there are things that over the past 3 weeks ive seen and i want to change about the way i am and the things i do. i know im not a bad person and i know the things that we encountered are not terrible. shes made me realize a lot and being apart from her has given me me chance to see things about me that i wish i could have seen before. all i ever asked of her was to be honest with me, dont lie to me and understand where im coming form when i express my thoughts and feelings. sometimes i feel that she didnt do those things. for some reason, i feel that i didnt do enough to keep her happy or i didnt do what i needed to do, but people say thats not the case. ive always been there for her.....cooking for her...giving her massages.....taking care of her when shes sick and what not. seems like with the things shes said....all that i try and all that i do is useless to her now. on sunday, i went to lunch with her...and we held hands...i was so happy to spend time with her and to be able to see her. and later that day, i went to church with her, her mom, and sister. she held my hand, she hugged me, and when i dropped her of she even kissed me. this was all in front of her mom and sister. it seemed so natural...so right. the other night i asked her if she spoke to some guy she met at a club and then went on a blinddate with him about 4 weeks ago. she said yes..... shes been talking to him. i asked her if she was interested...and she said she didnt know. today she said hes a nice guy and said some good things about him. it hurt me thinking im not good enough for her or now im nothing. anyhow, i asked her to give us a chance to work things out, but she said no and that she doesnt want to miss a good opportunity. it came down to me asking her about her actions with me when she does see me...and she said...its because im used to it. and thats why shes been telling me to give her time and space so she can get rid of her emotions and feelings. i dont see why alison would want to throw all we have away....to fix the issues at hand...and to continue to hold my hands to make the relationship stronger and unseverable no matter what ups and downs we may encounter. ive poured my heart out to her...and have told her shes the reason i want to change certain things. shes said she doesnt feel the same anymore and that i should let go because she doesnt want to give me any false hope. she would rather drop all her feelings for me and risk going out to see what else is out there. i asked her what i can do...she said give her time and space, but what i see now is that she may have already found interest in someone else. though she says "its not even like that", its killing me inside and i dont know what and why this is happening. PLEASE HELP!!!
  10. brit

    sad

    hi, i went to the party tonight and saw my ex. he was with a girl he was seeing before he met me. they were holding hands and she was going out of her way to rub it in my face. going up to the bar right next to me. moving to sit near where i was and then playing with his hair etc... needless to say i felt ill. he didn't know. we talked a number of times and i was always talking to people throughout the night. he left with her, but came over to say goodbye. one funny thing -- i'm probably reading too much into it -- he called me the nickname he had for me when we were seeing each other. after the break-up and things were rocky, he always called me by my real name and never, until now, mentioned the nickname. i miss him. what should i do? nothing? i will probably see him again in a few weeks. should i call before and see if we can get together or just wait? thanks
  11. hi, its me again, somthing very special happened today. and i hink i ***ed it up. so anyway........ this is how it happened. well i rang my friend up. and asked her if she wanted to come round and watch a video with me. so she accepted , and she came round. now about half an hour into the movie. we started fighting. and i eventually pinned her down, i started slowly biting on her neck and kissing her neck . and i got the impression she really liked it....then she asked me a question. i was shocked, and went all shy, she asked me to pull her thong out.....now i then responded with "are you serious" and she said "yes" then i said "why cant u pull it out" and she said "becuase your holding my hands" so i let her go..and she pulled it out herself, then we sat back down and watched the film , about 10 minutes later, she sat up ...(by the way ,we were on my bed) and she said "pull my thong out" she was facing me and she had her trousers pryed apart. i being very shy thought she was just messing around having a laugh. so i laughed and said "no", now after the film was finished she spoke a bit and then she left, then when i thought about what i passed up i starting kicking myself.i felt like an idiot. do u think i should of gone ahead and pulled it out?, maybe she wanted it to go a little further? and what i done or didnt do i may have gave her the impression i dont have them type of feelings for her!? and she may never give me another oppotunity. so what a really want to know is ,......why did she ask me to pull her thong out??because maybe it was just a favor or she wanted me to put my hand down there?, also, if i did give her the impression i have no intrests in her, and she never trys to make a move(assuming she was), ...what can i say or do to let her know i am still intrested. am thinking next time i see her...(more and likely 2morro), i should make the move.....how should i go about this, what shall i do, what shall i say? DAMNNNNN! i feel like an idiot... ....
  12. Okay, I just have some questions about girlfriends. Recently I started dating a girl that I really liked, and it was awesome because I found out she liked me too. But here's the thing...I suck at being a boyfriend. You see, This is like my first girlfriend, it's pathetic but oh well, and I think I need to grow up or something. We're about three weeks in and we're still not holding hands. For a little while we would hug when we left each other, but that now ceases to exist also. It's like we're just friends again. Mostly it's my fault (I think) because I haven't been acting like a true B/F. I really want to tell her how I feel but then I get a funny feeling that she just suspects we're no longer dating, so it's almost not worth it, if you know what I mean. When I do talk to her about this, should I confront her on whether or not she still wants to be dating or should I just stick to telling her how I feel. I'm thinking of bringing up the fact that I've been a pretty sucky boyfriend (by this I mean I haven't made any moves, like holding her hand or putting my arm around her, or breaking the ice in anything. Yeah, it's really pathetic, I know.) and that I want to fix it but do you think that would create a vision of insecurity and confusion. What I mean by that is, do you think I'll look too much like a newbie with no experience in dating. Dang, I guess what I'm asking for are some ideas on how I should approach her. AND, I'm wondering if I just blew it and there is no hope for me making a good comeback. I here it's always the first impression that sticks with women, hmm. Hopefully I've done an okay job at explaining my ordeal. Thanks for who ever responds.
  13. Well I asked this girl is she liked me striaght out because i my heart couldnt take the pain from holding it in, and she said she liked me only as a friend and that she doesn't want to lose me. And when i hung out with her, we had ice cream together, we cuddled, held hands, she put her head on my shoulder. Does she just like being flirtacious, having someone around like me, or is she afriad of going out with me? Sometimes she gives me signs and sometimes not. I like her a lot and cannot stop thinking about her. What do i do and does she like me or teasing me?
  14. Well my ex-girlfriend about a year ago has recently been, I'd say hiting on me. She does have a boyfriend and they've been going out since January 2004. I am on good terms with her and the reason we broke up because she was going to be gone for the whole summer and we both agreed it would be best to break up since we wouldn't be able to keep communication (she went off to some camp for dancing). We dated for about 5-6 months. Well recently she has been sending me huge signals that she wants me back or at least thats what i think they are. I sit infront of her in my English class and a lot of times she likes to slide her hand along my shoulder and then slide it down to my pecs and she will sometimes just hold her hand there or grab my pec (she has been doing this quite often) and she mention how nice my pecs are. She also tends to just touch me a lot and hold her hands there, she says she does it though because my body is always so warm and her hands are always cold. We also play a lot about going in the janitors closet and having sex (we have never had sex together and we are both virgins), or sometime i will just playfully move my hand up her leg but back off and we start laughing. Today we compared hands size and we both just kinda sat there for what seemed like forever holding our hands on top of each other, palm to palm, no holding though. Then I just kinda playfully tried crushing her hand because it was getting really akward. I know she wouldn't do anything to hurt her boyfriend but all these things she does to me wants me to have her back so bad. I just want her b/f to break up with her so I can get back together with her. It feels so good when she rubs her hand around my chest and when she plays with my hair, I get that warm feeling (no not that horny feeling). What do ya'll think? You think she wants me back but doesn't want to hurt her b/f or something? I want her back so bad but I can't. Maybe I need to just find me a g/f and move on.
  15. I dunno about that title but sounded good at the time. I just want to let everyone know that this going out and getting distracted thing does work. Two (girl-friends) from up north came down cuz they never been accross the border to mexico. And I had a GREAT time down there. Man I mean the one friend and I danced the night away. We held hands danced close. It was awesome, I so needed this weekend badly. Made my self-esteem go up and looking at things in a brighter way. I was smiling for the entire day afterwards. Just through I'd share, it does get better after you get dumped.
  16. I have managed to have a relationship with this girl for over a month now we have been going out. However, I am kind of new at this relationships thing. I dont know what the norm is. How often should we kiss, hold hands and what not? When should we start talking about having sex?
  17. sorry for the second post but I need more help, me and this girl nancy I have been hanging out with went to a creek near my house, we sared a fire just us two, I asked here and she odesnt want a steady relationship but she said we will be buddys, but yet she allways snuggles with me and hold my hands in the truck and and squeezing them when she talks to me. she also allways bite piecies of gum in half and gives me the other at the creek she even came walking down the bank in here underwear. Is this girl being the tipicle girl and no telling me the truth or is she serious she only wants to be friends. I want to kiss her and have asked her if she would slap me if I kissed her she no and say it anit like I would think it was gross or anything! should I kiss this girl and really see or do you think I am wasting my time
  18. I have been friends with this girl for a long time now. I have always kinda had a thing for her but never spoke up about it because she was with someone else. Well she broke up with her boyfriend and has been single for a while now. I had her over for a party a day ago and we where flirting a lot. She told me that she really enjoyed hanging out with me I told her I enjoyed hanging out with her. We where in my hot tub talking to each other that night and she started to hold my hand. We held hands for a while and then she had to leave so we got out and said our goodbyes. I didn't give her a kiss or anything but we smiled a lot at each other. We met the next night at a party and it seemed like we weren't talking as well as we where before. It seemed as though, to me anyhow, that she was looking at this other kid a lot. Every now and then I would walk past her while she was sitting down and she would look up at me. We hardly talked at all except for when we asked each other how each other was doing. I don't know if she really likes me or if maybe she is more into this other kid. She's holding my hand one night and looking at someone else another. It didn't look like they where flirting at all but then again me and her weren't flirting very much that night either. What can I do to find out if she truly likes me or if she was just being really friendly??
  19. We have been dating for 4 months and we pretty much live together now for the past 2 months. Everything was going great, we were both in love and she would tell me all the time. Less than a week ago she told me that she wanted to love me forever and that i was the "one" Now in the past 3-5 days all of a sudden its like she doesn't even like me. She won't tell me she loves me unless I tell her first. She use to show affection to me all the time hugging/kissing/holding hands and now its like unless I initiate it we wouldn't even touch each other. I kind of got fed up and was like fine, if your not into I won't be either and I just kind of stoped initiating, last night we slept on like opposite ends of the bed, when a week ago we would of been right next to each other all night. I think she can sort of tell that I'm a little backed off and its drawn her out a little more, but thats not really a good thing. I mean I don't understand how things could be like 100% perfect 4 days ago and then all of a sudden she sort of went cold twards me?? Could it be PMS? I don't want it to sound like she treats me liek crap now, if anyone saw us together they would say we had a fine relationship, its just not as "lovey dovey " as it was before... Well I guess thats it.
  20. been going out with a guy for a lil while now. were good friends before and after an awkward start things are going well. but during our dates we don't hold hands or do anything as though we are 'together' and its only right at the end that we kiss. we're both fairly shy and waiting till right when we've got to leave sort of makes us more nervous, you know like how you know its going to happen. its not like i don't like kissing him, far from it i want to do it more often! he also seems to think that i'm not altogether comfortable with him but i don't know where he's gotton that idea from - so wrong! so, any advice for how I (being extremely shy) can let him know thats its ok?
  21. ok this is a really long message but coud you please read it thanks. there this girl we have been frinds for 2 years i really love her she knows. she started goin out with a guy 2 weeks ago i decided to move on and just be friends. so on saturday a big group of us went out. her b/f wasnt there. so we started talkin like usual then she started trying to get a football of me so we had a little game of basketball together. so we eventually stop and carryed on. then she decided to put grass down my shirt so i did it back and she chased me. so we caryed on walkin. wehen we got there me mates were watchin tv so we started havin arm wrestles then little games like that. then i stoped watch tv and she started hittin me playfully so i did it back and we had a little play fight.then made a secret handshake up. then she started pokin me. so we went out again. her b/f was down the park where we went she went over for a few secs then came back we played soccer for a bit. i was in goal she ran up ftront then kept coming back to speek to me. so we had a rrest and she started climbing this thing. she fell off and really hurt her self. but her b/f just laughed and didnt come over she started to cry so all me mates comforted her i sat with her for a while. then all me mates went. it was just me and her. her b/f came over so i went to the side. he laughed at her and walked off again. she was reall upset and asked for a hug off me so i hugged her for a while then sat down and put my arm round her then she held my hand. so she got picked up and went home. so today i had a lesson with her. and we started playin hangman and o's n x's with each other. she gave the ocasional quick galnce at me and sometimes a bit longer when i had my head down. so i got to break and she was talkin to her b/f today dunno whats ging on with them because she left at lunch time. so anywho would you say she was flirting with me or just being friendly. thanks if you reply i know that was alot to read
  22. I read through other threads on non-verbal communication but didn't find what I needed to know. I am at a point very early in a relationship where holding hands or other touching might help tell me (and her) where we stand, but I don't know how to initiate it without being clumsy or pushy. We've only had one date (our first was a couple of days ago), but we have known each other for about six months. Our hands have accidentally touched before - while holding a newspaper together, passing a book to each other, etc. - and I noticed that she lets her hand linger on mine longer than is really necessary. But during our date, there didn't seem to be a way to hold hands for real. What do you do on a date when there is one arm of a chair between the two of you and room for only one of your arms to rest there? I did what most guys do, I think, and rested my arm there without even thinking about it. I noticed she sat with her arms folded for much of the time. Even when I moved my arm off the chair and rested my hand on my leg, she didn't put her arm on the chair. I wanted to hold her hand, but did not want to reach accross her whole body to take it. That would have been really obvious and awkward, and there was no opportunity to "accidentally on purpose" touch hands. I've heard people say that crossed arms mean that a person is closed off and is trying to keep distance between them and others, but I don't think that is always the case. Some people do this when they are nervous and shy, and she is a little shy, so I didn't take that as a bad sign, and there were good signs. We always make eye contact, she turned her whole body toward me when talking, and we really listen to what the other says. And, while walking around a crowded lobby I stood back and let her pass in front of me a couple of times and did what has always seemed natural to me with a woman: I rested my hand lightly on her back, which didn't seem to bother her, but I would like to feel her touch me too. Does anyone else have the same problem? RandyB
  23. I've been dating this guy for about 2 weeks now. We hang out quite a bit, and get along really great. We always greet eachother with a hug, and depart eachother with a hug as well. We're going out on my boat tomorrow, and I was wondering. What are some ways to make it known that you're ready to be more intimate? Not intimate in the sexual sense, but holding hands, cuddling, maybe a kiss or two?
  24. Hi my name is Brent im 19 heres my thing Me and my girlfriend who is 17 have been going for a month and things looked SO perfect .. Then out of no where she is like , im confused and she is not sure what she wants , she says its not me , its all her . We went out today and things at first were bad, just silence then we talked and then we went to eat to talk more , we talked a lot , she sayed that she doesnt know if she is just scared , or nervous or what, i am her first boyfriend and I know that makes it hard when she is not used to it yet .. I dont know at first i thought that it was just going to be a little phase but then she is like away, no holding hands , cuddling or kissing is going on .. Even things like nicknames are no longer being used , usually at night we will talk on AIM since its easiest to do , and she is just getting weird and i mean she always Calls me babe and now she isnt calling me it .. I dont know what to do , she is going to make up her mind soon BUT im now just getting irritated its been 2 dayz , and i told her she can have a week. Now im just Blah , I am performing VERY badly at work , Im a cashier at wal mart and people are asking me whats wrong , cuz im not smiling or anything , cuz im hurting knowing that I may lose her .. I told her that Im here for her NO matter what she decides to do , Im now thinking that she is going end it NO matter what .. But im not sure even on that .. Well is there anything that any of you would do in this situation ? I mean i dont want to lose her , she really is special and great for me .. hope someone can help me thnx , PP
  25. Yesterday i was with my gf. We decided to meet up with some friends of mine so we did. When we met them we were holding hands but then she starts mocking me and sort of "making fun" of me, like jokingly calling me a loser and stuff. Then after about 10 minutes things get weird i told her that i wanted to go somewhere with them but she didnt want to go, so then she goes over to my friend and puts her arm around him and says "Im going out with him now" and they move up a couple of steps and then she runs back and grabs my hand, but then she continues "making fun" of me. Is she trying to make me jealous? or is just the way that she might act.
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