Genesis

You can send him a email but , send it more as a friendly gesture. Do not tell him that you miss him in a e-mail save that for when he calls you. If he wants to get back together I am sure he will bring it up on his own. Go to the movies with him but as friends! Do not sleep with him or any thing to hot any heavy! I feel it is a mans job to chase the woman, who wants an indecisive man. Flirt with him and give him hints that you still have feelings for him but at the same time do not make yourself seem too desperate. Did he dump you? If he did make him work to get you back!

It looks as if your ex may be taking you for granted. I think the best thing to do is to give her some space for awhile, and you also need space too. Sometimes people do not know what they have until it is gone. My ex and I have been apart for four months, he pushed me away at first seeking space, but now I guess he has realized what he has lost. I did not contact him for four months and now he is actively trying to reconcile with me, I however do not know if I would want to get back together. Love is a funny thing. Give her some space and do not talk to her that is the best thing you can do. If she really loves you , you will be on her mind no matter WHAT is going on in her life.

I agree with you you partner should be your best friend but... For me my ex was my best friend and recently he confessed to me that I was his best friend also but, where do we go from their? I trusted my ex more than I trusted some of my girlfriends. I thought of him as a better friend that my girlfriends, but who was there for me in the end not him? Each story is different. We love each other be we are not together or know if we should get back together. He wants me back but I do not trust him due to his actions with other girls. Losing him as my best friend was like stabbing me in the heart. I feel like until I get a rock on my finger, I will not place my all into a relationship until I know that it is heading somewhere.

I am a woman and oral sex is important with the right person. Do not go down on every girl you meet however, make sure you both have been tested for STD's. You should go to link removed this web site gives a lot of advice to men about sex and dating issues. It is also helpful for women to read to get an understanding into the way men think and feel.

Christianity is the only true religion and maybe one day you will realize that. Many people run from their feelings and run from the teachings of God. The other religions you speak of have no sound validity. If you choose to look into Christianity you will see that the bible has an answer for any and every question that you may have in life. The reason that your life is peaceless and with out joy is b/c you do not follow Christ. Even in times of despair, I have a sense of inner peace b/c of my faith. Finding and understanding the teachings of God is a personal journey that no one can force you to do. However, just realize that by not being saved you are opening up yourself to be lead by false practices and teachings which may lead to living a life filled with despair, and sin. Many other religions claim to be valid, but most are just creations of evil, which works to bring people away from God. As the Bible says it is Satans job to Steal, Kill , and Destroy you by any means necessary. Satan will use trickery to make people join the occult, to make them think that they are practicing a true religion, but they are not. The Bible states that any religion worshiped other that Christianity will only lead those persons to Hell. It is sad but true, It makes me so upset to see how blind people can be about their souls. When you die, I am sure that you will want to live in eternal peace. However, as it says in the book of Revelation, those people who do not give their life to christ will go to Hell. I hope that one day you can find a friend who will help lead you to Christ. You may try to experiment with other religions, but when you are in your last days I hope that you will convert to Christianity, so that I may see you in heaven when I get there.

Hello Friend, I feel the same way about my ex. He does not have the ambition that I would like in a man. I know how you feel. He has been begging me to come back to him lately, but I do not think I will take him up on his offfer. I miss him dearly, but I ask myself all the time is this really the type of guy I could picture spending the rest of my life with? I do not know. I hope that I will finally make up my mind about him.

Hello Sega Girl, It is me again. 8) Well I think that you are right as a moderator it is your job to give a unbiased opinion. but for the rest of us...... I feel people are what they experience and should express their opinions. A wise man is wise b/c of all of his experiences. When people come to this forum they should not expect to receive a sugar coated answer from every person who writes them. You and the other moderators do a great job in giving unbiased advice, but I do not think you should prevent people from truly giving their opinion. Everyone should be able to see all sides of the spectrum. From the conservative opinion to the liberal opinion; to the outspoken to the softspoken, everyone should be heard. Tough love hurts, you should not hide the truth from people or censor what they have to say just because you do not agree with it. When you show the entire picture people can choose which advice to ignore or which to follow. Toughen up people this is the real world!

Praise the Lord and not Satan. Revelation 21:8 But the cowardly the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars- their place will be in the fiery lake of burnning sulfur. This is the second death. God is the Alpha the Omega the , beginning and the End.

well.. kdreger do think that women are too sensitive or are guys just pigs? We have to put up with so much, staring at other women's chest in front of our face, porn,stripclubs. Do men care if we do the same things that they do? What do you think things would be like if womens roles were reversed and we acted more like men, do you think maybe the sexes could get along? Well back to the point: Even if they were his kids that should not be a reason to just let him do what ever he wants. So if you had kids from another relationship and your wife said, I must go shopping and max out your CC b/c you brought baggage to my life. That is not fair or right. That should not be an EXCUSE. That is all I am saying kids should not be an excuse for what he does. Well, I guess we can just agree to disagree.

Yes, we all have a right to say what we want, and if some want to practice witchcraft so be it.But as a Christian and a believer of God and our Lord Jesus Christ, It is my job to speak against anything that does not please God, which is witchcraft a form of Satan. I also am offended and have the right to say it. Everyone has the right to do what they want but, I know that being a witch is a form of devil worshipping.

kdreger, 1. Do you think there is a point when looking at porn gets to obsessive? 2. Would a man really be fine with a woman who wanted to watch porn without her BF or Husband, and no longer wanted to have sex with him, b/c she felt like he did not compare too the studs in the Porno movie. There was this post about 2 weeks ago from a woman who said that her husband looked at porn so much that he no longer found her attractive or wanted to have sex with her. My ex use to look at porn at times, but it does kind of make you think whats wrong with what I got? I fussed about it for a little while but I just gave up on the issue. I also feel like you can not build a strong foundation for marriage if your always looking out the back door. My point is porn in a way invalidates your marriage. I think lustful hearts are the reason that so many marriages fail. If you can not be faithful and honor your marriage vows, which includes lusting in your heart (porn), then you should not ever marry. Porn may lead to other things like cheating, but all men do not cheat who look at this. There is nothing wrong with having an anal husband b/c a anal husband will more than likely not cheat on you, look at porn and leave you. I think the two men are kind of right, do not make a big deal out of it , but demand for him to respect you. Maybe he will cut down and stop all together one day. The kids do not have anything to do with it , he is married to you not your kids!

I think you are right, however the big problem is that many people are not settled with themselves until they are in their late 20's. I think that it is best to wait to get married. There should not be any rush, I have had many friends who have got married when they were young 22, 23, 24 and get divorced 2-3 years later b/c many people are not sure of themselves yet. They do not want to miss their youth and why should they. People are too dependant on their BF or GF that they lose their sense of self. I did this and I regret it! Why do you think people use the same line I need to find myself when they break up with someone b/c in some ways it is true. Why marry young when you are not sure? Your wants and needs change, I love my ex to death, but I know now that he would make a horrible husband b/c our wants and need do not match.

I was like you I drove my BF away, but just know that you were not all of the problem. I blamed myself for so long, but if he was not acting right or being mean to you, you have the right to demand respect. Do not feel bad for standing up for yourself. Continue to read your bible, watch sermons on TV . It is an every day process. I watch a program called Chaning your World it comes on every day @ 7 am on BET and 8am on TBN. This is a really good ministry that has had many sermons about relationships and singleness. I have learned so much! I watch it every morning before I go out to work, and It helps me get through the day. They have had sermons on Maximizing your Singleness, Finding the Right Partner to Marry, Staying Away from Bad Company(friends & ex BF), and many other topics that have helped me so much. I watch several programs with different pastors from different backgrounds. They all have helped me so much. I do not cry over my ex anymore! I have sad moments but I master my emotions. My religion has helped me sooo much to get over my ex, everything works different for different people. Maybe the fortune teller was right, and yes they are not to be relied on according to God, but it is an after fact now. I nagged the hell out of my ex, but it is an after fact, I know that I was not 100% wrong for demanding respect from him. Take this break up as a blessing. Another sermon I watched about divorce said, that God knows your heart and needs and if that man walked out on you, God will give you a mate that is 100 times more fulfilling, if you praise the Lord, and move on. You will meet a better man, you just have to tell yourself I am going to move on and if he comes back I will worry about that when it happens. We all realize things we did wrong after the fact, but we still need to move on and be happy.

Once you realize that you aren ot getting back together you will start to heal. It takes a long time but if you keep wanting him back you will never get to the place you want to be. If you want the pain to go away you, can not long for him and want him back. Yes you will think of him from time to time but it gets better trust me.

I do not think spells or witchcraft will make you get over your ex, it is just about mastering your emotions, and finding emotional freedom from within. Healing is a process that does not happen over night. After tring the spell there will be moments when we may backslide back into negative thinking. Well good luck to all. I wish everyone will find a way to help them get over their ex's. I do not believe in spells maybe affirmations of the problems, but not spells. That does not agree with my religion. I do however think it is helpful to accept your situation by writing or saying something out loud, and burning the ex's pictures if it helps. I keep at least one picture of all my ex's , but store them away, you may regrete burning all of their pictures if they die or something. One of my friends ex died in a car crash, and she had nothing to remind her of him, she regrets it to this day. God wants us to forgive people of their sins against us, so he can forgive us of our sins. Years later I do not have any anger to my ex for breaking my heart. You get over your hurt, and move on. I do not want my ex back , but I still respect him as a human being , and would not wish any harm to him.

What? I guess if it helps try it! Good Luck

I was going to ask to same question. I think a great place to meet guys is at church, or at parties with friends. It is always helpful to ask friends if they know someone that they could hook you up with.

Her e-mail sounds likes she is ready to move on and she is tring to be friendly with you. I do not know, keep in touch sounds just like a distant phrase to me, but that is just my opinion. I think you should move on she is, seeing other guys, you may get back together but you just need to be away from each other right now. Good Luck. Hang out with your friends more, talk with your family, come here and write from time to time and you will feel better.

I agree with crookster. I mean what is wrong with men who think that they can act like they are single when they are married. I would go to therapy in addition to talking to your pastor if you go to church. Many people dismiss religion as a way to solve problems but it has keep many couples together and willing to solve their problems. I have this ass hole who sends me harassing email b/c I guess he is unsaved and does not believe in the power of God. People with out morals or character behave in this manner, and have no respect for the covenant of marriage or thier responsibilities to their family. He is a jerk off who left his kids and wife with out saying a word, and is mad b/c I called him a coward. Well back to my point... You need to set boundaries with this man I think he is having a midlife crisis or the seven year itch as they call it. He thinks that he is missing something and his youth is fading away. You should not stress yourself out b/c you are pregnant right now. Set up times where he can go out with his friends once a week. If he respected you and your kids he would know that it is not right for a married man to be in the bars at 2 and 3 in the morning. He may be having an affair again, but you really do not know that so do not bring it up. You should talk to him about your problems and a way to resolve them. Communication problems are the cause to most marriage failures. If all of this does not work out, consider having a separation, things do not look good right now , but they can get better you have to do research on how to save your marriage.

What did you do to piss him off? Maybe it was just an excuse? Men do this sometimes b/c they are cowards and do not want to tell you the truth. Do you know if he may have been dating this girl while you were with him? Its seems strange that he already had a back up plan before you were even out of the picture? I know this b/c my ex blamed a lot of things on me for our breakup, when he really was just cheating and trying to come up with reason to blame me. I blamed myself for many weeks for our break up, then I realized that I was not all to blame, there is nothing that anyone can do to someone to justify lying and cheating. (nothing) Breakups are a 50-50 thing do not blame yourself, it is not all your fault I am sure. Write the letter and give it to him. I think it was really tacky for him to have some other bimbo pick him up from your house. Stop calling him, men do not like to talk to thier ex's for the first few week-months. He will contact you b/c it looks like he really cared for you. My ex contacted me after 3 months. Try to do as much as you can to move on.

This is too soon, you should not spend so much time together. Getting over a failed relationship is hard. People always make the mistake of thinking that they have to jump right back into dating after a break up, or fall in love with the first person that shows them interest. You do not make someone your boyfriend after two week! You should only see this guy 2-3 times a week and that is it. Why do people try to speed date. It takes time to truly get to know someone. Don't you notice that in the first 3-6 months of dating people are on their best behavior?You may not be seeing his true colors. I am a firm believer of taking things slows and not rushing into anything. You have only known this guy for two weeks and you are acting like you are insane over him. I guess Lust and Love makes people crazy. If this guy cannot be away from you for a day or two, he may be needy and possessive. Slow this train down, see him only once or twice a week and talk on the phone every other day. I am just like you I broke up with my ex in April after four years, and I am not ready to date yet. I know that I am not. I think I want to be single I have been in two relationships for a total of 8 years, and I think I need to be single. I feel like it would be wrong to try to date someone when I am still not ready to give that type of commitment to someone right now. This is just me if you are ready then go ahead, but I know that when I broke up with my first boyfriend of 3.5 years I got right back into a relationship six months later. Now that I think about it , I do not think I was ready yet. It is not about being in love with your ex still it is about being emotionally ready to put everything in the past and give your new love all of yourself. I think you can still see this guy but slow things down! I would hate someone stalking me like that all the time. Do not make up your mind about a guy until you have known him for at least a month and a half. People try to rush into things and get hurt, do not be on the rebound you are only hurting this guy. Stay single for awhile until you can get into a good relationship. Dating does not mean seeing the same guy every day. Talk to other men, If you are honest with a guy he will understand that they are not the only guy you are seeing at the moment. If they do not understand, then they want something from you that you can not give them at this time, a commitment. Being single is not a disease. PEOPLE WAKE UP! I KNOW THAT WE ARE ALL HURT, BUT WE DO NOT NEED A BF OR GF TO VALIDATE WHO WE ARE! LETS TAKE OUR TIME! If you rush right back into something you are not sure of, then you will be here 1-3 years from now crying over this guy on enotalone.

Yes, long distance relationships are really hard. I think you should make up your mind and let him know what you want to do. All of my LDR's have failed, but I have heard of people who were in LDR's for 3 years and later got married.

I had a dream one time that my boyfriend was cheating on me with a heavy set girl. The very next day we broke up. 3 months later I found out from friends that he was seeing some heavy set girl. We were in a long distance relationship, so I never saw him , and would have had no idea what the girl he was seeing looked like. I took the dream as Gods way of telling me what was really going on with him since he lied so much and would never admit to his infidelities. Since we lived in two different cities I really did not know what he was doing most of the time, I guess he was with her. I now see the dream as a blessing. I do not know how long I would have been wondering about what was really going on, if I had not seen the vision. I think my angels were looking after me.

I do not think he will take you back b/c he can not trust you. I would not take you back, you my just envy him b/c he moved on. That happens all the time, when you get him back, you may not want him. I hope that what ever is the best for the both of you happens. I feel like once a cheat always a cheat. Good Luck though you seem to be an ok girl so, I hope things work out for you.

Jim, You are right you can not expect for her to want to jump right back into the relationship. Like I said before, just take things slow, be her friend for now and maybe in the future you can get back together. I think if you focus on your new life, family, friends, and new job, it will take the pressure off of thinking about your ex-girl all the time. We can not force people to love us they must come to us, You may only get to talk to her every other week. I would work on trying to bring focus to your life now that you are out of jail. Just remember that she may not come back to you, so you may have to move on. She will want to put most of her time in trying to make things work with this new guy. You are on the right track. Do not scare her away by saying that you love her, or she may not want to talk to you at all. Take things slow and if she does not come back. move on.