LiquidCherry

If you meet someone at a club or bar chances are you'll meet someone who likes going to clubs and bars. Are you okay with dating someone who enjoys those activities with or without you? That's your answer. Another thing to consider is if you don't like going to these places it will most likely show in your body language and may even effect how you act. Or you may find you have an unexpectedly good time.

Imaginary- All opinions aside religion is probably one of the big reasons why gay marriages haven't been legalized, the other being homophobia. I'm not homophobic. Just as the title of this thread indicates this is a debate. In order to debate you must support your opinion. As my position is based on a religious point of view it was necessary to mention, especially since ShySoul brought it up. His statement deserved a response. I haven't attacked you in any way, or anyone for that matter. If you read all of my posts on this thread you would know I am bisexual. If you knew me you would know I have 2 gay friends. Do they know my position on this issue? Yes. Do they care? No. Neither one of them have any intentions of marrying me; it is just something we disagreed on and moved on from. novaseeker- Good point and I have no rebuttle. Still feel the same though. Debates usually only sway those who haven't made up their mind yet.

The religious meaning behind marriage is why I do not think that the words meaning should be changed. That's not something a debate is going to change for me just as I'm sure I won't be swaying anyone here either. The power to marry is granted by the state and I believe that God recognizes all marriages regardless of religion just as he recongnizes us all to be His children. More about religion.. Many things are considered sin, many of them I am guilty of. Homosexuality, like it or not, is a sin. God does want there to be love in a marriage and I'm sure that is important to Him but what He doesn't want is for us is to live sin. To me if it is not what God intended for a marriage to be how can it be a marriage? For that reason I do not believe it would be redundant at all to allow for the same rights under a different name, it is a different type of union.

That, I agree with you 100%. I was referring to what can be done at this time though. I still wish I could remember what that form is called. That I don't think is fair either. I think any capable person or couple that wants to adopt a child should be allowed to do so.

I qouted Shakespear to make a point: That either side can see the same point from a different view. What counts to myself and others is that a marriage is between a man and a woman. Why create a second name? Because it is something different. I am not saying it is something less but it is not the same. That's my "why". Why is the term marriage so important to you? Why is it so important to change the very definition of a word? Homosexuals can't be married as they are of the same sex. It's not discrimitory or segretory. (Yay, I made up a word!) Why is my solution offensive? Why wouldn't a legal union allowing for the same rights by another name be a good compromise?

We do have a different little name for everything. It's called language. I believe the definition of marriage is, "The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife." Equality would mean to be treated equally. I'm all for that. I don't believe that that changing the definition of marriage is creating equality. If you look back to my first post on this thread you'll see my suggestion. I don't want the definition of marriage to change. Why not coin a new term for a new type of union? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. As long as you have your love and your rights why get so sensitive over a name?

A similar situation occurred between my boyfriend and I. He told me. Sure, I was jealous, mad, and hurt but as a good friend of mine put it, "Wouldn't you rather marry him knowing that he's honest and told you the truth?" She was 100% correct. Also, I can almost gaurntee that the question of "did you do anything with anybody else" WILL come up almost word for word and what are you going to do, lie? If you want her back tell her you want her back.

I was taking a philosophy course a few semesters ago and there was this beautiful sexy perfect amazing guy. I remember his features better than I remember anything I learned... I'd catch him looking at me sometimes, maybe it was because I couldn't stop staring... One day during a group discussion he sat by me. Maybe all the other seats were taken? Anyway, he sat down and the conversation proceeded as follows- Me: Are you gay? Him: Um, no. And that was it. He never looked at me again. Why I asked him, I'll never know. Of course I'm a female but still, I don't think it's ever a good idea to just ask someone. I've also found that gaydars seem to be pretty accurate. If you're open about your sexuality you might say something like, "Hey, I think it's cool your comfortable being friends with someone who's gay."

I might be wrong but I think you can list anyone you want to be an inheratant. I also know that all you have to do is sign a piece of paper giving whoever you want the authority to make medical decisions for you if you become incappable of doing so yourself. (Problem is, most people don't do this even though it is really simple and easy. I should know the name of the form but I dont. ) I know a girl who was raised by a gay couple so even though it's not as common I know gay couples can raise children. Maybe it's not common because a smaller percentage of the population is gay? The "problem" for me isn't gay couples by any means, it's the term marriage. To me marriage it is a union between a man and a women. Call it any other name and I'm set.

I'm not much for the whole soul mate idea. My worst relationships were with "soul mates" but I do look for good things. Humour, Intelligence, Compassion, Passion, Tall, and somewhat rough and tumble. Enjoying games and camping is nice too.

I do not believe that people can choose their sexuality. To a certain extent I do believe that even those who considered themselves gay are attracted on at least some small level to members of the opposite sex simply because it is an instinct but I don't think they choose to be gay. (It's hard to explain exactly what I mean but I don't mean that I think all gay people are really bi.) I'm sure some people can argue the whole nature vs. nuture dispute but I think it's been proven to be a genetic trait.

My grandma was 4'11", my aunt is 4'9", my father says he's 5'4" but I stand taller than him at barely 5'3"... NONE of them have had any problems finding relationships. Well, no more problems than anyone else. Lots of guys like shorter women. And I have to say, if your mother and her friends make fun of you perhaps they are trying to make up for their own short-comings. (pun intended!)

At the risk of being bashed I'll say what I honestly think. First, I'm a Christian, not perfect but I'll never deny my faith. Second, I'm bisexual and because of my beliefs I choose not to act on this. Third, I don't believe it is my place to judge others, that is for God to do. That being said, I'm against gay marriages. I think a marriage is between a man and a woman. At the same time I believe that it is unfair that married couples receive benefits while gay couples are unable to. My solution? A new law. Something to the effect that if two people (straight, gay, lovers, friends, roomates, what have you) have been living together for a period of say two or three years they are able to file paperwork to allow them the same tax and insurance benefits that married couples receive. Please don't hurt me.

I found out six months into my relationship with my boyfriend that I have herpes. For what ever reason that's when I had my first break out and our course I told him right away. He kinda freaked out, went and got tested a few times, and came back negative thankfully. He tried to be okay with it but he wasn't. He was scared and would wig out if we had sex which actually was the worst part about having the virus for me. We broke up and I was devastated. My story has a happy ending though. Six weeks later he came back and now we couldn't be happier. It hasn't been an issue since. He's not afraid anymore because he's more afraid of losing me. I'm not an expert really on telling people. You have to wait until the person really knows you and knows that they want something more than just a fling. You also can't really wait too long because eventually the person will feel as if they've been lied too. I think it goes without saying that you have to tell them before the relationship gets intimate. I think that educating your partner that he/she does not have to become infected even if you are careful is being slightly dishonest or at least a bit shady. Educate them about facts and how to reduce their risk. Even with protection, even with medication, even with never having sex during an outbreak there is still a chance that they could become infected. Granted, it's still a very very small chance but I think it's only fair that a person is able to make their own decision and it's up to the two of you to decide what measures you are going to take. I don't really care that I have herpes. What I want in a relationship is unconditional love and if someone would choose not to be with me because of it well, then I doubt they could ever love me the way I want for someone too. Don't ever let anyone put you down or make you feel bad just because you have herpes.

In the custody papers it has to be requested by a party that the statement about disparaging remarks be added. At least, that's how it goes in New York. If it's not there I'd go to the family court office and request a modification to the order be made and no judge would disagree with you.

My boyfriend broke up with me the day before his birthday and about a week before his party. I didn't call. I didn't write. I didn't send a card. I didn't make any appearances. Here's why: If he wanted me to be there for his birthday he wouldn't have broken up with me. I've noticed something with birthdays when it comes to getting dumped: It happens before their's and after your's. Of course this applies usually with break ups occurring around these days and it's because they want you to still enjoy yours and not feel like they dragged it out a bit longer to get a present out of you for theirs. Anyway, I wouldn't.

Although there are always exceptions I do agree with your friends. Not only do I speak from personal experience but I believe that a man (or woman) who truly values commitment would end their marriage prior to starting a new one. There is a grey area that can occur with separations and such but if they were living together.. I think your friend was wrong for lying to you. Maybe she wrongly handled her concern for you dating this man. Maybe she's jealous. Either way, she shouldn't have lied to you. I also don't think you have bad friends or a bad boyfriend based on your post. Everyone will make a mistake in a relationship. Depending on how the situation is resolved and if a pattern emerges determines the nature of the relationship.

To me it would seem that your relationship problems may have less to do with trust and more to do with your self esteem. I am certain that there are many things about yourself that make you desireable to your girlfriend. Why not make a list of your positive attributes? Also, with love there is always the risk of getting hurt but the benefit far outweighs this. Anyway, I do apologize, I don't have the best advice for self esteem issues other then perhaps to seek out a good book on the subject.

For many people, most people I think or at least for me anyway six months isn't long enough to get over someone you deeply loved. It many be very possible that your friends rebound as a means to help them heal. In reality it doesn't work very well. When my highschool sweetheart broke up with me I rebounded. I actually cried about him to the first two guys I dated and even cried about him once a few years later. If I had just allowed myself to heal that wouldn't have happened. Right now you're not in a position to love another man as much as you loved him but that's only because you haven't fully recovered at this point. You said that you hope to meet someone that you can share these feelings with again. That's a wonderful thing to hope for and you're remaining open to the possibility of love which is essential for it to occur. You're doing so much better and you're going to keep on getting better. You'll only hurt for as long as you need to greive, just continue taking taking steps forward.

Cheating isn't always physical, it's mental as well. Having friends is one thing but having feelings for someone else while in a relationship and acting on those feelings (and again, physical or mental) is cheating. As an example: A couple of months ago I developed a "crush" on someone. I love my boyfriend very much and would never intentionally do anything to hurt him and so I distanced myself from this person, problem solved before it even started.

cute lil poem

In New York there are only certain grounds for divorce one of them being spousal refusal of sex for a continued period of time. I'd say 2 years is a loooong time and I don't blame you one bit for the way you feel, married or not. If she were wanting to wait until marriage until she began having sex again I'd advise you to either leave of wait it out depending on what you wanted but I don't really think this is the case as you said you've tried changing everything that seemed to be the broblem. Perhaps there is a medical condition that it causing her libido to be low? Would she be willing to see a doctor? Is she on birth control or other medications? Many can decrease sexual desire. What are the reasons she's given to you for not wanting to have sex? Depending on her answer is how you can determine wether to stay or to go.

Keep your plans. It's never very nice to blow someone off. And unless you are seriously a push over I would continue to be yourself around her. If she doesn't want a nice guy find someone who does.

The sex you'll be getting is no commodity. What you are getting out of this isn't sex ,it's someone who sleeps not only with you but with other people too.

So basically he told you that you're not enough because he still wants to date other people and believe me, this will only go on for as long as it takes him to find someone else. What a pig. People here have posted time and time again about an ex having their cake and eating it too.. This is the best example I can think of. I can't believe how selfish he is. If he really cared about you, even if he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't string you along in such a cruel and intentional way. The first thing I thought when I read this was that you would be putting yourself at a major risk of contracting an STD.. Even if he used protection with everyone he slept with including yourself you'd still be taking a chance. And how would you feel if you had a date with him on Saturday night but you knew it wasn't on Friday because he was "busy" with somebody else? There's a difference between stepping back and taking things slow to make a relationship work and running in the opposite direction. Don't settle for anything less than what you want and believe me (because you said it yourself) this isn't what you want. You deserve SOOOOO much more.