LiquidCherry
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Everything posted by LiquidCherry
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krissbrown- We don't use condoms so it's not that.. It's not an infection of any sort, we've both been checked and I trust him. It's only after we have sex and only if he orgasms in me. If he doesn't, I'm good. I think I will ask my doc next month at my appointment.. But that's a wait.
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I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now and we haven't used condoms in ages. Lately, maybe for the past month or so, when ever we have sex it burns afterwards but only if he cums inside me. It usually lasts about an hour or so and it's really uncomfortable. Could I have developed an allergy to his semen? And if I am is there anything I can do about it to make it stop? This really sucks, isn't any fun, and I don't like it at all! He thinks I should try an antihistimine before sex but what if it's a skin reaction without an immune response? What am I supposed to do? ARGH!
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I'd say it's a good sign.
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I can be snoopy and it's always a sign of mistrust. I'd say it's better to be with someone who doesn't give you that urge to snoop..
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The above are links to some.. alternative dictionaries. I checked out Urban Dictionary for the definitions cause I didn't know about the other three. Here's what I learned: Red Wings: oral sex with a female on her period Brown Wings: anal sex with a female Gold Wings: a golden shower Silver Wings: sex with an older person And yes, "Wings" is a term of achievement.
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When I got back together with my boyfriend it was pretty much the same story. He told me he loved me once and then he wouldn't say it and it was almost as if he was afraid to show affection. After a couple weeks I talked to him about and he told me he was acting differently because he didn't want things to turn out like they did last time. He was afraid that he had to act totally differently and everything about our relationship had to change or else we wouldn't last. I told him that I need to hear he loves me and gave him this cheesy analogy: That saying, "I love you," isn't like picking a rose from a garden (where once it's gone it's gone). Saying, "I love you," is like planting a seed in a garden. He laughed at me but got the point and started to open himself up again. I wouldn't change things now for the world.
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It wont get easier...
LiquidCherry replied to xshortboarderx's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
To me there is not much of a difference between a break and a break up. A break is to a break up what dating is to a relationship.. Sometimes they'll lead to one and sometimes they won't. Either way: it's practice. SO... In my book you didn't cheat on her. Here is where I think you may have made your mistake: I would have been hurt too had this happened to me. Perhaps she feels less trusting because you ommited this.. Lying is often done through ommision. You truly regret what you did, that is so obvious by your words. I know remorse by one is one of the first steps towards forgiveness by another. I wish I had answers to your questions but I do not. I do know one thing. Fate does not decide if people are together. People decide. -
P.S. What would be most scary is if you simply did nothing and assumed everything was fine. Your sexual health is something only you can take responsibility for and what is scarier than a STI is an untreated STI.
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I know you're scared, I've been in a similar situation myself and many others have as well. When you go to the clinic no one will judge you. Most people are there because they care, truly care about your (sexual) health. Have you ever had a pap smear? For the most part the appointment is pretty much like that. They may ask you some questions to try and better understand what you may be at risk for. And the blood work, well that's not a big deal unless you have a thing with needles. I don't think asking the other guy you had sex with would tell you much of anything. He could lie or he could honestly think he has nothing when in fact he does. The only way to truly be sure is to get tested. Some people might say that as long as you are using condoms with your ex you need not tell him. Others would say that even condoms don't offer protection against several STI's including HSV and HPV. It truly is none of his business who you have slept with since your split but it might be best to hold off sexual relations until you know your status for certain.
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Ice skating, movies, bowling, dinner. Actually, one of my most memorable first dates I ever went on was when I was 15 and we went ice skating. Neither one of us was very good, spent most of the time on our butts, but it was fun and I still get a kick thinking about it. Wish I had more tips to offer but I'm a dinner and a movie kind of gal.
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I've come to a painful conclusion on more than one occasion: Just becaues it looks and feels like a relationship doesn't mean it is one. But like Tigris said, it could very well turn into a relationship as well. Personally, I like knowing where I stand.
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Sypyilis can be very serious, even deadly, but if caught early enough it can be cured. I believe that there are three stages, the first being a painless lesion. Often females don't notice it because it is inside and males often discount it as there is no discomfort and the lesion goes away on its' own. Many STI's are spread through skin to skin contact and do not require bodily fluid transfer while others do. I cannot tell you anything other than that you did engage in behaviors that would put your health at risk. STI's often don't have symptoms and so many individuals are unaware that they have one. My advice to you would be to go to a clinic get checked out for STI's. Have a culture and get blood work done. You may have to go back in a few months because sometimes it takes your body awhile to show a response which can lead to a false negative if the test is done too early. Don't be ashamed. Anyone who calls you "horrible" or "dirty" is only immature. Anyone who is sexually active is at risk of an STI regardless if they've been with 1 or a 1001. It's important to "know who your friends are" if you know what I mean.
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So is THAT how they come back?
LiquidCherry replied to nataliejulie's topic in Getting Back Together
NJ, I wouldn't try to de-crypt this one, I think it can be taken pretty much word for word. He loves you and is attracted to you but he doesn't feel it is healthy for either one of you. I would assume he previously told you he didn't love you anymore because he didn't want to anymore. In truth he does and it sounds like he is still hurting over your break up. Until he is fully able to process his emotions I don't think you'll ever know one way or another if there is hope left.. Unless you make up your mind first. -
Goodbye for now, Thanks to everyone
LiquidCherry replied to healinginnyc81's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
Even though you are hurting right now she did teach you something very important: You are capable of experiencing this level of happiness. You learned to experience this through her and now that you know it is possible you can learn to experience it on your own. Best of luck to you and take care of yourself. -
Whenever I've heard the words, "I need space," I've never thought that to be a good thing. In fact, that relationship always ended with me being dumped. A relationship is two people, space is one. If it was me that received a random text from a guy and it made my boyfriend insecure I would let him read all the texts I had gotten. Saving them but then deleting them so you couldn't see them just seems like guilty behavior to me.
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I've been divorced for almost a year now. It sounds like you're already hurting even though the actual legal aspects of the divorce haven't started yet. Divorces are painful and it doesn't really matter who files, it still hurts. I know I felt a sense of failure and disappointment along with the pain. It takes a lot of strength to stay in a relationship that is making you unhappy or is unhealthy for you. It takes a lot of strength to hear that your partner no longer wishes to be with you. It takes a lot of strength to leave a relationship and move on. You have this within yourself, to do what is right and best for you. Focus your strength where it needs to be.
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Showing S.O. posts you make to help solve problems
LiquidCherry replied to xmrth's topic in Dating Advice
I think it's a good idea in theory. I haven't done it and here's why: Unless a problem is abusive in nature I think it's a good idea not to talk about relationship problems with other people. I know I prefer others to view my relationship in a positive light. Sometimes we do need advice and it's wonderful to be able to receive objective and anonymous advice. But I imagine if my boyfriend were to post about a problem we had on the internet and show the thread to me I'd be feeling highly defensive at that point and it probably wouldn't do much good at all. Problems usually aren't solved in a confrontational manner and that's just how I would take it. -
Scared? Nah. Insecure at times but that's just me. I was wondering because I was reading this article called, "How To Tell if Your Boyfriend is Cheating," or something like that. One of the things was if you don't know their e-mail passwords. The author said it meant he had something to hide. Well, I don't know my boyfriends and he doesn't know mine and it just got me thinking. I never really thought of it as a trust issure before and I had a few freak out moments that it could mean doom and gloom for our relationship. But frankly, I wouldn't feel comfortable knowing he knew mine though of course I wouldn't mind knowing his but he'll check his email when I'm around so.. It's just nice to know my original thinking seems to be the consenses.
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Great job! Be really proud of yourself! I haven't SI in over 9 years and the more time that goes by the more foreign it seems that I used to do that.. I learned to write. Write, write, write. It's great you have someone to help you out of this but don't ever forget how strong YOU are!
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And BTW, your post didn't make me feel like throwing up, not in the least. Having sex while on your period isn't for everyong and it sounds like it's not for you. I don't mind doing it but my boyfriend does and so we don't... To me it's just not embarrassing. It seems like maybe you were pressured into doing this and if that's true could it be why this is so upsetting to you?
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I totally wasn't aware that I am incorrect simply because you entered puberty before I did! What on Earth was I thinking?! I have some interesting friends and so that's how I know. (They're probably a bad influence, don't ya think?) If ya feel like it check out these links: ^^^^^^^^^Don't worry, texy only!^^^^^^^^^^
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Hey, it's nice to know that you're feeling and doing better! Healing takes time and is a bit of a process. Still sounds like you're having some mixed feelings but that's normal too. When dealing with heart break I've had days where I felt fine and then the next I'd feel like it happened yesterday. Those sad feelings will become fewer and farther inbetween and eventually they'll dissappear. There are 1001 ways your ex could be feeling right now and your progress in the past 4 1/2 weeks don't have much to do with it honestly. Remember, there isn't anything you can do to bring your ex back but you sure can push them further away. Keep up with your LC/NC and hang in there. It is entirely possible that once you've accepted your life with out him he'll come back to you. Hey, it's happened. But it's also possible that he won't so keep working at moving on because no matter what the outcome you won't regret it.
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File a restraining order and tell all this to a judge. They'll make him stay away from you.
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So what if you had grown sons and hugged their girlfriends? Wouldn't it mean that you cared about them, approved of them, and were glad your son was happy with someone? Wouldn't it be a way to welcome them into your family? (you don't have to be engaged to welcome someone, btw) If you had a grown son and you hugged their girlfriend I am *positive* that you wouldn't be doing so out of attraction. Give your girlfriend a break. Caring and being able to show affection are POSITIVE personality traits.
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My boyfriend's mother hugs me. Granted, I'm a female but she also hugs my boyfriend's friends. It is not sexual, it's a hug. If there really was a problem with the type of hugs she was giving I'm sure that her daughters would have picked up on it giving both their mother and their boyfriends hell.