Yorkrose23

You should tell him how you feel. Tell him how much you like him and how you really enjoy his company. Ask him if he's looking for something serious, if he really is and you are not, then you may need to break it off.

It's always tricky when you are dating someone who's divorced. I myself am dating a divorcee and it can be hard, b/c here is this person who will always be a big part of their life(especially if there are children involved). A year and a half is not very long. My question to you is, he has those pictures of her, but does he look at them? If he looks at them, then he may not be fully over her. If he just has them, well, maybe he just did not have the heart to get rid of them. I would talk to him about it, it is possible that he may need more time to heal before he is ready to date again.

Being upset about your bf going to a strip club is IMHO, completely normal. I do not think you are necessarily insecure. I just think you love your bf and don't like the thought of other half naked women dancing around him. I do think that if he really loves you, nothing will happen. But if it bothers you, then I think you should tell him. Pretending like something doesn't bother you and going along with it will only lead to bigger fights in the future. I do not think it is whiney to discuss something that bothers you. I think he should at least hear you out regardless whether he decides to go or not.

Well, she really is your friend. It was brave of you to tell her your feelings, and it was brave of her to be honest with you and tell you that she just likes yo as a friend. My opinion: Stay friends and don't expect for more.

Diet pills can be a good and bad thing. Here's my opinion as a nutritionist, some general info on diet pills: On the plus side, people like them b/c they just take a pill and lose weight. Unfortuantely, the negatives far outweigh the positives. Any type of supplemental pill, diet or otherwise, are never as healthy as natural things. (IE Pills used to get more vitamin A, it is better to just eat foods high in Vitamin A) Your body absorbs it better, digests it better, and ultimately in the long term, it will have more evident results. The same goes for diet pills. People often confuse Supplements for substitutes. Supplements such as diet pills are meant to be used as part of a new diet, not just taken with no diet adjustment used as a substitute for not eating right or exercising. Also, they can only take you so far, they help you lose water weight, but that's it. I have yet to see anyone lose more than 40 lbs. with diet pills. Anything beyond that you have to use the old fashioned way. Plus, they cannot help you strengthen or tone your body. They don't conform to individual bodies based on factors of size, age, height, weight, and physcial limitations(all essential factors in weight loss programs) And the scariest side effect, they are addictive. I have seen lots of clients take them and then continue to take them after they are no longer losing weight with them. Not only that, but then some people just keep them in their cabinet and pop one every time they gain a little weight. This is extremely unhealthy. I highly suggest that your mother see a nutritionist. Find out what programs are right for her and proceed from there. I would also say that unless she alters her dieting or exercising habits, she should cease using the diet pills until she consults a nutritionist or doctor. (Funny thing is that on labels of most diet pills- it usually says to consult a doctor before use- but most people never seem to actually do that) When clients come to me and say they are taking a certain supplemental pill, I always ask them first if they have consulted a doctor, 9 times out of ten the answer is no. It is always wise to consult a doctor before you alter your diet severely, or attempt to lose a lot of weight. So far, the safest most effective way to get rid of weight and keep it off is good old fashioned eating better and exercising. Good rule of thumb- short cut= short term results. Good luck!

Talk to her. Tell her you are sorry you acted like a jerk. Tell her how much your friendship with her means to you and ask her if you can make it up to her. Treat her to a movie or dinner or something, this will help you redeem yourself AND it can be a little romantic, just don't push anything too soon. Good luck!

I think he shoudl have told her he has a gf and he should have asked you how you felt about it before he said yes. I think that was very disrespectful of him to go out with another girl, you should talk about this.

IMO, When you make love you are celebrating your love for the person you are with. It's very intimate, passionate, loving, caring, and beautiful. Sex is more of a physical satisfaction with not a lot of emotions involved. Both can be satisfying, depending on what mood you are in.

If I love man- it does not matter. Typically, I would have said, "no, I don't like them" but my current bf has pretty big muscles,and I love them b/c I love him.

Dear 11Flower: First off, I'm sorry if I have offended you. That was not my intention. I actually really empathize with you. I was not blessed with very large boobs(like you I'm not flat but very small) and I understand the frustration. I know that we are different people and our ideas may be different but I really want to share this with you: I was constantly teased in school(and in work, they got reported) for having super small breasts. Folks told me I did not look like a woman, I'd never get a guy until my boobs got bigger, etc. And it was frustrating b/c there's not a whole lot short of surgery that you can do. Now I consider myself to be fairly pretty, but I got this idea that I would only be really beautiful or look like a woman once my breasts got larger. I thought about surgery, etc, but in the end I realized it wasn't for me. I did everything I could, though. I got push up bras, padded bras, everything. One day I was at Victoria's secret and saw those "fake boobs" that you can stick in your bra to make you look bigger. Well, I thought I'd try them on to see how it felt to have big boobs, and you know I was surprised at my own reaction. I did not look any prettier, or more womanly, nothing really changed about how I looked to myself- I still looked like me- just with bigger boobs. I didn't feel any better either. Since then I had realized I needed to work on my self- esteem. And I learned to love my small boobs, my bf loves them b/c they are me, regardless of how big they are. Now I know we are different but: Maybe you should try falsies for a while and see how you really feel before resorting to surgery. Now in regard to what you said about haircuts and makeup- true there could be confidence issues there too- but the difference between that and surgery is at the end of the day you can take off the makeup or undo the hairstyle. If you decide you don't like the implants, it means another operation. All I'm really saying is to make sure surgery is the right thing for you before you do it- if in the end you decide you want to- then hey, more power to you. For myself, I learned that a woman does not need big breasts to be womanly or beautiful. Good luck. Love, Yorkrose23

They are out there, just keep looking.... he may show up when you least expect it.

From a strictly biological standpoint it makes sense. Most animals in the animal kingdom are not manogamous. But what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom is our greater ability to think, empathize and emotionlly respond. When feelings are involved it can become a sticky issue. If someone wants to screw around, that's fine. But IMO, they should never get married. I think it is unfair to ask someone to be there for you and support you emotionally, physically, financially, mentally, and otherwise while one person is off investing their time and energy in another person. But this is also why I believe that most people are not cut out for marriage. Not a conventional marriage anyway.

It's really up to you. It's your life. But I will tell you this- from my experience women who sleep around a lot often regret it later in life. I'm not trying to scare you or anything, this is not always the case. Just realize that if you do decide to be the wild child, you will should get familiar with the following: telling people how many partners you've had, not worrying about your reputation, asking folks to use protection, and getting tested for STD's every year. If you're not comfortable doing those things, then you may want to think twice about it.

Never have, never wanted to. I just don't really connect with women in general. Almost all of my relationships in life are with men-almost all my friends are male. I would only want to be with a man. But I would never knock anyone who wanted to try new things, to each his or her own!

I agree with Amethyst. If a man loves you for who you are, it should not matter if you're an A or a DD, they'll want to be close to you, not them. I've never been a big advocate for plastic surgery unless it's used for a good reason. But IMO, people who do it strictly for cosmetic reasons have larger confidence issues than a trip under the knife will help them with.

It doesn't bother me. I've been there and it really is just a restaurant. The way I see it, a woman does not need to be dressed skimpy for a man to hit on her and/or look at her in a sexual way. That can happen anywhere. As far as the clothes go, string bikinis are far more revealing. You ladies who have a hard time with hooters, don't ever let your man go the beach alone. I think really if you are a gal and you have never been, you make it much worse in your mind than it is in reality.

Of course shyness could be part of your personality! As a nutritionist, one thing that reallly ticks me off is when people start going on medication for every little problem they encounter. Some people are just more shy than others, and that is perfectly normal. I myself get shy around strangers, but when I'm with friends I can't shut up. Please don't assume there is anything medically wrong just b/c you are a little shy.

Well, it is one thing to run away from your problems, but quite another to alter your life if something is making you consistently unhappy. I want to just remind you to keep in mind that every situation will have it's positives and negatives. Home schooling will not be perfect either. But try it out and see which you prefer. Good luck!

Yep, I'm totally there right now. I developed feelings for someone I shouldn't have. I can't explain why I feel this way. So, yep it does happen.

I agree with asmodai. I would call just to finalize that it's over.

Thank you all very much. I feel a whole lot better now!

Thanks lonelyand blue! It's nice to know I'm not crazy.

What is more important to you- the thought of losing this pseudo-friendship or the chance of getting her back? I think you should talk to her. Tell her that you're very sorry about lying, and that you love her so much that you finally had to come clean. Tell her that you are sorry you disappointed her and hurt her feelings but that if she will give you a chance- you will do anything to regain her trust. I'm not saying you were right in lying to her, but since you did come clean and apologized, I feel that if she really loves you, she would forgive you. I do have to say that IMO, if she really believes relationships never involve being hurt, she is sorely mistaken. The ones we love are the ones we hurt the most. And if she never wants to be hurt ever again, maybe she is not ready to be in a real relationship. Now I'm not saying you should hurt each other all the time or on purpose, but in any long term serious relationship, feelings will be hurt by both parties at some point. Because unless you lied about being married or having children or something like that, I guarantee you will have bigger issues than a lie that you apologized for. Forgiveness is essential in relationships b/c nobody is perfect. I think that you should talk to her about this, explain why you did it, tell her how badly you feel and let her discuss why she felt hurt. Then you can tell her that you never meant to hurt her so deeply and ask for another chance. If she cannot forgive you, I don't think you can have a relationship anymore. But I still think you should try b/c you don't sound too happy with this pseudo -friend thing. And if she reacts poorly, then it really won't be worth having her as a friend. Because IMO, a true friend can forgive you for anything. Good luck!

Hey lonelyandblue, Like you said, it is incredibly normal to feel that way when an ex gets married. I have fantasies all the time about previous bfs even though I am very happy with my current one. I know I would be incredibly jealous if a couple of them got married. And I find myself just thinking what if things with he and I had worked out, etc. But then you think about why things with you and him didn't work out and the reality sets back in. I don't know if you are currently attached or not- but if you are start thinking about all the things you love a/b the guy you're with now. Or ir you're unattached think of all the possibbilties for a future mate. What qualities he will possess, how well he will treat you, how perfect that will be. Good things are yet to come.

Someone once told me this: You can learn to like someone, you can learn to love someone, but you can't learn to be atrracted to someone. I totally know how you feel. When I was in high school my best friend fell in love with me. Now obviously, I liked his personality and all that b/c he was my best friend. But I just wasn't attracted to him. And then I went through all the guilt of feeling shallow, etc. But then I realized, physicality in a relationship is important. You can't have a relationship with one person wanting to kiss and the other feeling awkward about kissing. Then what happens if one party wants to have sex and the other doesn't because they are not attracted? It can become a huge problem in a relationship. Well, I thought I'd be the one who proves the above quote wrong and dated this guy for like two weeks, but I actually ended up hurting him more b/c it would he'd be so into kissing me and I felt totally grossed out like I'd been kissing my brother. I then broke it off, b/c it was just too hurtful. If I could go back I would never have dated him. Like a previous poster said, it is more important to be honest with yourself. In the long run it will hurt less now than later. BTW- that guy is still my best friend to this day-Eight years later.