goddess23
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hey all. ok well thers this guy who i became friends with a little over a year ago (around march). it was clear he was quite attracted to me but at the time i was getting back with my ex (one of his friends). anyways...time went on and we became really close like we just had the most awesome connection. we spent alot of summer days just going places fairs n museums! so then around october i guess you could say he SORT OF made a move? like we were at this university thing and we were just sitting on this terrace and he was hugging me alot and just like acting like my bf like seriously. and then later that month we went to this thing called screamers and like again really touchy and it was really intense. and like the whole time we were friends he was VERY FLIRTY VERYYY CARING EXTREMELY SWEET. talked about marriage n stuff. about two months after that we ended up fooling around for the first time. and it was totally weird i mean we had never even kissed before. anyways we both seemed freaked out. but soon we just started flirting and going back to normal. we basically until today talk about fooling around and we did once after that. he was veryy into me like before i know that but now it seems like he doesnt care. one minute hes sweet next hes vacant. so rite now he was barely talking so i put my nikname on msn as "y the fu* do i care?" so he starts being all wats wrong are you okay?? like i dont get this guy. and hes REALLY AVOIDING spending time alone with me yet he always makes sexual comments. i mean im just wondering is he simply afraid of commitment? does he not like me anymore? whats going on? anyone else in a similar situation. biggest problem: i love him. really.
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what gives you this impression? even her saying it to your face isnt valid in this case. breakups are hard and people deal with it in different ways. remember the good times and understand that you are who you are because of the experiences in your life-ALL OF THEM and bad ones make us stronger. i went through a breakup. my first bf and last so far...and i know the pain. but just focus on moving on. what i mean by that is, realize its over, it was wonderful but its over and its time to know that you willl look back and smile and so will he/she ten years from now remembering the good times. and understanding that it makes you the person your current partner will love.
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sorry but i dont believe in breaks. you either break up and get back together or simply break up. A BREAK IS THE DUMBEST CONCEPT THAT I HAVE EVER HERAD. think about it, a break is suppose to be a time when you can just be by yourself and not be attached but if you have this title "break" that means that you will eventually get back together FOR SURE which means how can either of you think about your future differently or act like your not committed. i mean if your on a break, what does that mean?? are you just friends? can you date other people? when does a break end? its tooo confusing and stupid makes no sense serves no purpose. if you break up and focus on moving on if it was meant to be you guys find eachother again. but a break causes problems because there are no defintions to it. time off? fine break up and not say well i need time because time will change things and one person sits there waiting thinking this time will soon be over. if she needs time tell her thats fine, but that you cannot promise to be committed to her in any way or even to get back with her later because things can change over time and that its fine and you still care about her but for her to not have any expectations and neither will you. its a break up. period. i would suggest you tell her that. if she was that hurt by it and she doesnt want to be with you right now fine. its over. if later you are still interested in her and shes ready then give it antoher try.
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your obviously quite stressed out about it. i know TOO WELL how it feels im the kinda girl that must tell a guy if i like him! like eventually it will come out. but i would advise that if you can wait then wait because it's a known fact-when a guy feels it he says it and even with my super shy bf i waited for him to say it first. live in the moment though, next time you see him do it, however, be prepared he may not be at that point because guys say it when they feel it. so if you need to get it off your chest go for it, just be prepared you may not get the response you were hoping for.
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heyy. o wow i can relate in alot of ways to this. men/boys are sooo annoying. but you know what. ive realized something. when a guy likes you they show it. they msg you, text you,call you, compliment you without a bit of fishing and will do the sweetest things for no reason. they appear to be the SWEETEST GUY EVER. when they relaly like a girl they do this. and as soon as you give in sexually or are in a relationship they get bored and move on or they become more invested and continue to grow. look...this guy maybe did really like you, and because you liked him you gave in too easily. liseen just be strong...because as a girl i know how degrading it feels when a guy rejects the oppertunity to fool around with you. like thats the one power we are suppose to have no matter what. and you dont want to put yourself in that position. move on and dont worry about being single because there is nothing wrong with just being alone sometimes. when you sotp thinking about it someone will just blow the winds of your peaceful scenery-in a good way.
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okay i dont want to be too optimistic because frankly anythigsn possible but i want you to understand that the chances of getting pregnant without actual intercouse is VERYYY LOW. mix in the time of the month (if she is not ovulating or close to ovulation then even WITH intercourse the chances are slim), pregnancy from your penis touching her vagina are rare. i mean you know the deal, when you ejaculate inside of her millions are killed off immediately. to get pregnant without intercourse is highly unlikely and there are a host of reasons she could be late or missing. but is she even due?? this happened two weeks ago, which would mean if shes due now she was ovulating at the time...the best thing to do is to tell her these facts and also have her visit a doctor. most clinics have no problem with keeping it completely confidential. and next time when you do fool around remember and remind her of what it felt like with this guessing game and be more cautious. and ofcourse there are other risks involved such as stds so using protection is always a good idea. but yeah just reassure her that the chances are VERY SLIM (if waht you described was accurate.)
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Bad test, need some encouraging words.
goddess23 replied to cichlid's topic in Career, Money and Education
heyy. you know we all have those ups and downs. and there was like a two week period where i thought i was just losing brain cells as my test scores were basically mediokre. we all get into funkss, and the teacher makes the WORLD OF DIFFERENCE. and when you look at it in the big scheme of things it really is extrememly insignificant. so dont stress about it--its doneee! yayyy, and now you can work towards your next goals, thats it. -
heyy power to you. i mean granted your age definitely shows the maturity but its very rare to find people who are upfront with themselves and can be truthful to their own soul. and i felt alot of similarities with your post. i loved my ex and ill always care for him and i see him and my heart skips a beat. but i also know he isnt right for me and im happy being alone. there are times that i do miss him (days like today) but really...whatever. i know im young, but ive only liked 2 guys in my life...now 3 im not exactly the typical teen. so yeah its just gotta get it out right? like today in school my ex (whom i still talk to and am friends iwth but hes very hot and cold) passed by my locker and just swung his jacket towards me started talking a bit before he headed to his class which is right next to my locker and then he stopped and hes like "who gave you the card??" and i mean it was one of those little ones and i had it stuffedi n my hand so you could just see a little speck of white and he asked me in this almost jealous manner. im like this girl n hes like ooooo and walked in. dont you love these moments!
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thanks all. well just to clear one thing up its not like i ever offically rejected him its just nothing happened and i didnt reciprocate the flirting like he did. but yeah...okay like our friendship isnt WEIRD but its not as AMAZING as it aws before ya no? but i know in the end being friends is probably the best way to go. ahhh thanks all any other comments or stories are welcomed and appreciated.
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What I didnt like....
goddess23 replied to gratefulpain's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
wow...im SOO THE PERFECT GF! loll -
What I didnt like....
goddess23 replied to gratefulpain's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
yeahh nice strategy sounded like hell! hmm...lemme try....he had nothing to say...EVER, well he was just dull. he could not stimulate my mind! dammit that was his only flaw....is that enuff?? lol yeee the good times totally kicked butt...but they werent the ones to marry. case closed! enjoy the memories and look forward to the ones to come -
she seems scared because frankly when you like someone so much how do you comprehend not committing. how can you put your heart out on the table and go on these dates taht are so amazing and know that the guy is like well i dont want to say ill just date you because i want to see other women? honestly it seems like shes scared and no matter what when things like this happen its NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to not get emotinally attached. otherwise she might just enjoy the chase and the game...but it seems like shes just apprehensive about getting more involved in something that appears to have no future. she may claim she doesnt want a relationship, maybe she was being true, and maybe being with you like this is too difficult for her because she doesnt want a relationship.
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hey all. well...this is really weird gawd i feel so cheap. so this SUPER CLOSE FRIEND OF MINE we've been like sooo amazing together as friends and i didnt like him like that before and he made it VERY OBVIOUS he was into me. he treated me soo well and i reallly started to like him. and lately ive honestly felt as if ive fallen in love iwth him. i mean really hes amazing. hes not my typical type physically but hes not bad looking and now i find him extremely attractive (i guess based on other factors ya no?) so we started about two months ago talking very sexually and both of us were making it obvious we were into one another. one day we ended up fooling around (this was like three months ago) and then after we were both like lets juts be friends. but we just flirted like just as much as before. so the other day we ended up fooling around again...and now its just a little weird...and he doesnt want to commit to me anymore like he made that clear. its so confusing he was sooo amazing and now he seems like hes becoming a jerk. is this because he doesnt like me anymore? or is it he doesnt want me to get too attached? does he just want to fool around? does he just want to be friends? whats going on!
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The girl that i like is now available... what should i do?
goddess23 replied to Jaxon's topic in Dating Advice
play it cool for now. i mean if she makes it CLEARR that she likes you then fine but i think right now give it time justtt to make sure its not a rebound here. just be her friend and symapthize wid her. -
woahhh man sorry but this seems pretty serious. and i wouldnt call this silly bs. cmon the fact that she told you they kissed and stuff like that (i talk partly from feelinsg i have exerpienced here ok) and shes starting to feel as if this isnt any form of cheating, trying to justify it because its so open. she gets caught up in other guys games?? this girl seems to want some time off...i think you should give her some space tell her that shes clearly confused and that you guys hsould breakup. let her find herself and if she relaly wants to be with you when shes ready to call you up. if you're still interested...then maybe you guys can pick up. i know this relationship is serious and its hard to give it up too easily but this is pretty whack!
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if these thoughts are starting to disrupt your life then thers a problem but this seems pretty harmless right now. unless you start to feel dependent on these thoughts to be turned on or feel its essential ot your sex life then i would worry. right now it was just a little overwhelming and exciting. so see how you feel in a bitt
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lol...oo valentines day. i love to joke about being obsessed with my ex and everytime someone brings it up i do the fake loud cry...but deep down it does still hurt to know that a year ago we were looking deep into eachothers eyes as he placed the chain with our initials around my neck. but embrace the beautiful memories and think wow my ex was great for those times and enjoy the fact that you are happier for being with them, and for being without them now. because you know deep down it was the right thing, all of us know it. eat the heart shaped chocolates like a regular circle shaped one! and pass the day hanging with friends and looking at all the hot members of the opposite sex. keep yourself busy and remember that you are who you are because of your past--that includes the good and bad and dont you love who you are?? no regretsss and hey we got some greattt gifts to show our kids and be like uh huh once upon a time i was a hottie!
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hey. lissen...let me fill you in on some PERSONAL philosophy on relationsihps lol. first of all, i dont believe in a break. becaues frankly, it makes NO SENSE. you break up. thats it. because when on a break does that mean that you are not suppose to date other ppl, does it mean that theres a time limit to "finding yourself" or doing what you want? and when petty fights are the reason for a breakup, the one who has pushed the argument is often the person who is looking for an excuse to end the relationship for whatever reason. im sorry but it seems this guy isnt all peaches and cream. he hasnt been that great in the past, hes not really nice right now and he clearly isn't ready to get back with you. i think you should focus on moving on and show him that you're not desperate for some loser. if he really likes you he'll realize with time what he lost and come back to you with a good apology. otherwise, at least you havnt wasted time thinking you're going to get back together, instead in a month from now you will be content with yourself being single and looking towards the future.
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hey. well she obviously felt quite strongly about this. did she bring this up before? if not this could simply be a nice excuse...because she shouldnt break up with you if she didnt inform you of how she was feeling earlier and given you a chance to make an impression. if she did and she did break up with you maybe she simply is demanding when it comes to a relationship, maybe you're not ready for a relationship. i really dont know the answer, but you need to take a realistic look at the situation. were you really showing her no care or appreciation? if you werent despite the fact you really like her im going to assume you arent ready for a relationsihp. i need more details to assess it honestly, the only thing i can say right now is that if you want to get her back do something romantic and sweet to show her you care. if you cant bring yourself to do that because you dont "show yourself" then...you need a girl who will understand this because this girl is clearly not going to accept that
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When to make a move while watching a movie....
goddess23 replied to cleveland9's topic in Relationship Advice
thankss...i hope you're right -
When to make a move while watching a movie....
goddess23 replied to cleveland9's topic in Relationship Advice
yeeee hold her hand! sorry im just daydreaming of how great it is when that happens....sorry yeah um wat was ur quesiton? -
goo with the floww lol. if you feel he isnt giving enough then find someone else to occupy your time (but my God you sound like me! i mean im the same way its veryy hard to get intereseted attt all.) so if you're that bored then FLIRTT what have you got to lose but if you feel that your setting youreslf up for hurt then just leave it alone
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i went against BIGGG CONVENTIONAL THOUGHTS and i had to have defense comments ready when i feel head over heels for a guy one year younger than me. i was 15 and he was 14 when we started dating and i mean everyones cool with it but the jokes never end and i even call myself a pedofile as jkss. hey i know that age is really just a number and that often emotionally you often connect with people who are away from your age group. its just WHERE YOU ARE IN LIFE is so different right now. shes thinking of university! and you are probably still in middle school. what you think is important right now is not what she worries about. there are tons of lil examples and you guys could be friends and maybe five years from now dating will be cool but rite now i think you would be heading for an embaressing but funny story to tell ten years down the road sorta thing. even if she does like you she would probably say no. look, if your situation is REALLY UNIQUE then maybe and if you feel that you need to get it off your chest (im like thatt) then go ahead but i think dating would be a horrible idea right noww.
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you know i think in the depth of almost every girl/woman lies the question of her sexuality. lets face it: girls are like always hott and clean and we can often connect with them as a friend. the most common fantasy for women is to be with another woman. now im not saying you are straight or you are gay or bi, im just saying that there are alott of people that go through what you're going through. i havnt done anything with a girl but i often feel as if i wanna see what its like. now the fact that you're cheating on your bf is wrong. and if you are this confused about your sexuality then you should tell him that at this point you need some time to figure some things out and that you need to break up. (i dont believe in breaks lol but thats another thread). but yeah this is no justification, cheating is cheating period. after being with five girls it seems that you are bi (in my PERSONAL OPINION) however, what do i know!! im just saying that im not sure how much "experimentation" you need before you can make a conclusion. after being with say two girls, and still feeling the need to be with them again says SOMETHING. i think you should take some time off and find out.
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wow you're more pessimistic than me! "should i just let things go the way they are while i lose interest..." well im in a somewhat similar situation...and to be honest the only real advice ican give you is to go with the flow. i mean you're into this guy so give him a LITTLE i mean you know flirt and make a bitt of an effort because he probably thinks that since this kiss you felt disgusted or something and now you've lost interest. (think of it from his point of view). so if you still want to do this little flirting game then flirtt i know you want him to do a little work and he might after his ego is slightly mended.
