goddess23

sorry just wanted to add: in my situation when my bf came back from vacation and was confused honeslty if i left it up to him we might have stayed together during that time. i told him look dont sugar coat it if you dont know what you want then we should break up. it was HARD it HURTTT LIKE HELL but bottom line after i did that i was happier knowing i wasnt being played or living in a fake reality.

hey props to you for being SO UNDERSTANDING. i agree there seems to be call for a break. but i just need to say this for everyone on this forum....i mean it is my personal thing but i think its based on alot of knowledge. there is no such thing as a break! realize that a break is suppose to free both people from any commitment or timelines. its to figure out what they want. really in essense, isnt that a breakup?? because im sorry but thers no point to put a time limit on something like this. that defeats the purpose. i mean what is that "lest both fool around for 2 weeks and then get back together". if you agree okay we need a break, its a brekaup and hey if later you guys feel that you know its something special then great and if not you move on. but to put a timelimit or stay committed during a "break". comon does anyone see what im saying. listen stratguy i realize this is a very comitted relatinship and what not and maybe this break title vs. a break up title helps it feel a lil better but really isnt it better to just breka up and say okay if we feel we have something real we'll get back together, and you not have this hope that you guys ARE GOING TO GET BACK TOGETHER. because really there is no guarentee. gosh im really sorry if im being a total downer (i realize you asked for support) but i just feel that its necessary to get this out there. she may be confused, thtas fine, its great that you understand that but really do you get what im saying? its better to just say lets breakup then and not have you waiting and feeling committed to her during this time and you both see what else is out there spend some "your own" time and see how you guys feel. because a break implies that you will get back together and i think that is false advertisement. i think its a way that both parties try to make it easier. see i think even you see theres something wrong with this. you said "and i dont want her to be with me if we arent rgiht for eachother but obviously i feel like shi*". and i commend you for being straight up with your feelings. dont feel that way though, peoplechange and things change and thers nothing wrong with you. and yes you dont want her to be with you if its not what she really wants right? honestly i think you should tell her that you understand she needs some time but maybe we shouldnt put a time limit here just call it a break up and if she feels differently fine. honestly i dont even think shes learning anything here because in her mind you're still "there" whenever she chagnes her mind. that doesnt make her learn whether you are really special to her or not. best of luck.

honestly some girls are just laid back (example me). i really dont care but yeah as some of the others said, why would you purposely do this? she could just figure thats you and be like whatever. shes your gf...so this isnt like a game shes playing to "pretend" at least i dont think so.

O WOWWW what a similar situation to mine. we dated for A LONG TIME and then broke up (he was the one who wanted to but i sort of initiated it) and 5 months later he wanted me back. and something was missssing. he told me he loved me the day we got back together and then never again because i never said it back...blah blha blha. basically exes and getting back together is tricky. but the whole officialness is difficult to really know because its like you've been down that road already so what happens now?? really i think you should just straight up say it. okay this is the way i did it: to find out if there was commitment: i was like "you know i know me and you have been dealing and whatever but like i dont want to find out that you end up randomly with some girl and then tell me it wasnt official lol. and hes like i would never do that and ofcoures i consider you my gf i tell everyone that". okay so mine went well lol but basically just randomly calmly bring it up....as a joke see what his reaction is. you can then play it off and decide what you want.

hey. honestlypersoanlly acne is the biggest turn off to me. so i think that clearing up will definitely get you more positive attention from females. sorry i dont mean to be mean to anyone i mean we all have our imperfections that toally suck but just personally acne dues kill it.

hey all you guys that posted any comments on my last post?? i would really appreciate the opinions.

totally feeling you depends! yeahhh that hair looks sexxy on alot of guys but yes it does depend on your face. but to be honest i personally like a full head of hair and not long just alot like thick and long enough to flip in the front. i dont know i just lovee that hairstyle sooo sexxxxxxxy and it seems to suit any guy practically! you know what im talking about flipping the fornt of your hair. with a nice thick back area to stroke my fingers thorough!

hey hunn. listen i dont want to be the bearer of bad news but truth be told he probably partly doesnt want a gf but partly just isnt interested in you at this point in time. now this could be because of circumstances in his life that make him not want a gf and thereforeeee not feel attracted to you right now. however...i really think theres nothing you can do at this poing except for try your best to move on. truly take it from someone whos been there you cannnot try and keep a friendship going and what not its not going to work right now. later on it might be possible, very possible, maybe even get back together but DO NOT have that kind of hope. its the worst thing, just focus on moving on: tell yourself its you past its over and focus on other aspects of your o so busy life. its tough i know it but just stay strong and you'll get through it. but nc will have to take place. be prepared for that

hey first of all dark ciricles arent that big of a deal especially for guys lol i mean honestly. sometiems it could make you look good! lol i duno maybe. plus dark circle are often hereditary (my unfortunate case!). you could use an eye cream that might help (avon lighten up plus is really good!). i mean a guy you wouldnt want to use concealer but an eye cream is not make up, i think if it bothers you give it a try. and relaly dark circles arent a big deal, persoanlly i find acne a big turn off (sorry its just personally it is) im just saying to me and im srue to alot of people dark circles arent a big deal unless they're pretty severe.

its fair game though. but you could say you know i like him too....see her reaction.

DECEIVED YOU! HA wowwww you all are living in a fantasy world. sorrry but okay i agree yes this is a quick change however its not thatttt BIG OF A CHANGE. i mean its not like you just found out shes a serial killer. come on, this is ridiculous. sorry again i mean i totally agree with one of the posters i mean several that yes physical attraction is very important and sex is very importatn. but i cannnot comprehend that your feelings will change so dramatically after a few pounds. i mean what if she got pregnant with your child, would you no longer be attracted to her? is it her apperance or her motivation thats relaly bothering you? i agree if you are feelings this way then it looks like you should get out-damned if you do damned if you dont so might as well do whats best for you. but really i would not be very understanding in her position, maybe you find that it is justified considering the converstaions that you had before the marriage. but really i think you should maybe try some conselling and talk to her seriously even if it hurts, it will hurt more if you just "randomly" dont want to have sex anymore. look i wish you luck i have truly never heard of something like this im a bit shocked to tell you the truth. and no it doesnt make you a bad person but a vain one yes. hey im vain...many people are, most people are. but this seems serious, im really wondering exactly how much of a weight gain this was! but honestly she did not deceive you. you were living in a fantasy world if you thought she would stay thin for even a year!

honeslty jus today i was giving a gf of mine a lecture about sort of stringing her bf along by telling him she needs time and thta shes confused because the fact is when a dumper does dumping its something thta they have comtemplated for awhile already. this person wants out at least at that moment and its UNFAIR to the other person to give them hope. to be honest it seems like this is what your girl is doing to you. i think you should MOVEEE ON. its tough but just tell her that you really want to move on and you need some time alone. later on you would like to be friends, and you'll give her a shout when that happens.

hey i see your logic however i disagree. i think thtas EXACTLY HUMAN NATURE: the grass is greener on the other side. you want it and miss it because you dont truly know what it is. it is curiosity and a fantasy that make you yearn for it. maybe technically speaking you cannot actually miss it because you've never had it but you can want it and feel that you're missing out. thats human nature. so when people complain about it i see where they're cmoing from but really they often dont know what they're talking about

lol aww rionmccloud i totall yfeel for you. i mean my first kiss was a month shy of my 16th birthday with my first bf and we've been going out for over a year and a half and we've liked eachother for a longgg time. so i can imagine what it must be like! im sorry for your loss! but yeah late bloomer as well....it was winter....just beginning of february. me and my BF lol yup were going out officially for almost 2 months!! well...he would walk me home everyday and i live in an apt building so he wlaked me to my door. and we were saying bye and we kissed. it was nice...quick and sweet. im SOO happy i wiated and it was definitely something i will never forget. and we both became muchh better kissers in a few short sessions! lol

hmm...thanx for all the repsonses. its interesting some of the information. honestly im an EXTREMELY mature 17 year old but i would not have sex with anyone right now because i know there isnt anyone as mature as me. imean my bf and i have been togther for a year and a half now, liked eachohter for like 3 years. so honestly it is a very trusting and very intimate relationsihp and i think about sex a lot. i mean i can see myself having sex with him in the near future as in another year or so. i think by the time i turn 18 i might be ready if im still with my current partner and things are going well. but there is curiosity in me and i was just wondering about it. because at times i feel like why not just do it, and other itmes its like omgg this is such a big deal. but it is interesting and sex is something very intimate. but do you all think that i would be having sex too early if i did around 18? considering my situation? and again anymore replies about it are welcomeee.

it does. totally. i mean it is ture though, women have that fantasy to just see what itsl ike. to be honest i think i would try it once....hmmm....mayhbeee lol

hey all. okay...guys and girls...is sex relaly what its all cracked up to be? i mean what does it feel like relaly?! lol...i mean me and my bf have done everything except sex basically and im just wondering i mean for guys is sex similar to getting head? any comments appreciated. o and btw does it realllly hurt the first time?

hey ive always wondered some of those questions too!! and yeah my bf came during just rubbing up against me it. not often often but i think if its long enough then yeah. and if you were only in your underwear then its likely.

its veryy refreshing your approach to a girl you simply LIKE lol. i mean to be honest i wouldnt expect a guy to be like that. look i think you should focus more on this girl you like and dont give this girl at your hs anyreason to believe that you're into her and yes tlak about the other girl. but seriusly the girl at your school, if shes all over you, dont hurt her but maybe just back off from it dont really approach her at all or try avoiding her like say you know she'll be there at that time just try not to be there. i dont know lil things. but until you and the girl you reall ylike are dealing then its not being "unfaithful" lol. but i say just ask this other girl out and make it offical because you said shes into you so just do it and then you can tell the other girl you have a gf and donee deal. then you can punk her off wihtout coming off as totally mean and not hurt her too much

hey yeah i know many people are often resentful. but realize ggoman that its fresh pain and many posters are just venting. i know, i mean i was there....and to be honest it hurt but i was so happy that i wasnt lead on, i was so happy that he respected me enough to tell me the truth and not take advantage of me when he couldve. and as much as it hurt i respected him even more lol, i used to say i wish he was a jerk!! we ended up getting back together but i know the pain and i know how my friends react. its just natural--think many ppl come here when its an hour after theyve had the news broken to them. but i agree i mean breakups exist and must happen and no one should be extremely angry or resentful for too long unless as you said there was a valid reason.

to be honest...if i dont have an ititial attraction to someone i find almost everything a turn off. i mean if im not attracted to them initially then if they keep their distance and arent too aggressive then i might warm up later. but really lets say i am attracted to the person, then what would turn me off: if you're TOOOO SHY where it gets awkward (actually my bf but he was way to great so whatever lol) but it is a turn off. and if he thinks hes all that (i mean SHOWS IT), ouchhh that could kill it. this is weird: but someone who loudly chews OMGG STOP. if im attracted to the guy though im not turned off by someone who is touchy feely and says very flirtatious lines, i find it a turn on to be honest. but thats me lol obviously some girls are different so yeah just be yourself, being genuine is really imp, keep it real and we can tell the same way i believe guys can tell if girls arent themselves. and someone who has no sense of humor very dry totalllly turns me off. oo and someone who i have to explain myself as i talk (which unforutnately is veryy common) but at least have the same intellectual level is nice.

okay i totally realize im not a guy here lol. but i just wanted to say that PERSONALLY i think a guy (or girl) looking at porn is completely natural and perfectly alight. i mean as long as it doesnt interfere with reality i see nothing wrong with it (or if you become addicted, or cannot be arroused by your partner because of it....etc). but really it is not something you should feel ashamed or embaressed about and if you ahve temptations why not. whats the big deal, its totally normal. or just ask your gf for some personal porn lol. but really she doesnt have a problem with it (as far as you know) and as a girl i dont think anyone should have an issue with it unless it is extreme (as i mentioned earlier). and hey let your other head speak lol. its not like your raping people. you make it sound like trying to battle the good and evil and really i think you should just do what you feel like doing. i mean in this case anyways lol.

well doesnt it naturally create more pleasure? i mean....okay as a virgin speaking my words may not mean much lol but i mean if you dont hump...what are you doing? staying still....how does create any....ya no??! lol. i mean i think girls do it too not as much but it happens.

toatlly agree with sidehop. really dont focus on making it interesting. i like humor. i think if someone had humor in their thing i woudl be drawn to it. so if it comes out naturally then great. and not TOO MUCH. just here and there.

hey well its early. i mean let it flow. who knows where its going to be. the friendship or this guy. os its too early. but you might want to talk to this girl and just say fair game. whatever your friendship is different from chopping this guy. i think you should just see what she says see her reaction. and you guys can flirt with this guy whatever and hey if anything happens then fine.