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hurtbylove

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Everything posted by hurtbylove

  1. hurtbylove
    It's hard but you will have to leave her alone for a while. Do try to entertain the possibility of a new relationship. If your life crosses path with your ex-gf again sometime in the future then so be it. It's unfortunate that she still doesn't feel comfortable hanging out with you yet.. It kind of shows that she isn't completely over you yet, there are still some kind of feelings there.
  2. hurtbylove
    I'm not sure I'm in a good position to answer your question since I'm young and haven't been married before. How long did you two know each other before you married? Have you spoken to him about this issue? I guess you have if you moved to live with a friend for awhile. How has he responded? I think it might be natural to be a little hurt, but I think he could be understanding about it. I understand that you feel like you need to discover more about yourself and explore before being commited. But I'm not sure if it would be fair for him to wait around for that. You are going through some difficult times, but it's good that you discovered this now and not have any kids invovled yet.
  3. hurtbylove
    It is very hard to disregard your feelings once you fall for someone, but you need to consider what is going on here. She seems confused and is stirring up emotions everywhere. If you value your friendship you need to at least back off for now from this girl. Have you talked to your friend about the situation, it is hard but ought to be done. I would be really angry if one of my friends was with my ex 2 days after the breakup because obviously my feelings are still there for her.
  4. hurtbylove
    She has to stop contact with her ex of her own accord. If you keep insisting that they stop communicating, it will cause a lot of tension in the relationship. Let her know how you feel about the situation and try to leave it at that. People can do dramatic things about feelings, like drop everything they have and chase after things that might not really be there.. Life sucks sometimes
  5. hurtbylove
    I'm going to be guessing here since I'm not a female. It's kind of natural for women to fall for those types of guys because it takes a brave/courageous guy to put his life on the line to save people. It's a pretty selfless thing to do and women see it as a big turn on. Woman logic is so hard to understand.. But yeah, firefighter/cops can be interesting people and have good stories to tell about their job too. Talking about drama at the office usually isn't nearly as cool as saving a baby from a 30story burning building.
  6. hurtbylove
    Unfortunetly I get in the habit of trying to find out whatever I can about my exgf's life too, and it always ends up with me getting hurt. We aren't together anymore, and our lives shouldn't be connected either. Any information I find just always ends up hurting me and I start to feel depressed. I have to understand that she had a life before me and will have a life after me. We had some good times but it ended for whatever reason. Maybe she will regret her decision somewhere down the road but it's not really my place anymore. She broke up with me. She lost feeling for me when I cared about her so much still. I have still been trying to grasp that she doesn't feel like she used to towards me and has already moved on. I still haven't been fully able to accept that yet.
  7. hurtbylove
    It really depends on your own outlook on how you see things. You should see it as a compliment that people would kick you for playing so well that they think you hack. One of my roommates is good at CS and when he gets kicked for having a good kill/death ratio he gets a good laugh out of it and just joins another server. Learn to believe in yourself and have self confidence and no one can put you down. It's something we could all learn from: stop caring too much about what other people think about us. Make people accept us for who we are, good and bad.
  8. hurtbylove
    Yeah, it wouldn't be a good idea to just tell her how you feel about her. Keep it a bit mysterious, like does he like me or not. Get to really know her first. What you are feeling is probably a huge crush or you are infatuated with her. Start up slow, just small talk for now so you can be more comfortable talking to her. (I'm really nervous talking to girls that I like) Go from there, and try not to be too disappointed if things don't quite work out the way you want. There are millions of other girls out there.
  9. hurtbylove
    There isn't much you can do except live your own life. She will recover from this, just give her time. It's probably best to keep minimal contact with her to help her heal. You sound like you need a little bit of time to think about things too. If the breakup was for the best then you did nothing wrong.
  10. hurtbylove
    Well, do you still have feelings for them? I think it's best to cut off contact with your exes, at least for now. If they never really got a chance to see life without you, it's not really being fair to them. You hold all the cards in your hands and no one can decide what to do for you. I don't know how seriously they feel about you still but it's not fair to anyone at this point I think. The longer it drags on, the more it will hurt later. You will have to stand firm by your decision about what to do.
  11. hurtbylove
    Talk to friends, it helps a lot. It hurts the most when you are alone and the thoughts begin to wander. It's been more than a month for me and I'm still feel a lot of hurt. It gets better, it's slow but you will heal in time. Talking with others who have experienced the same thing you have helps. The heart does illogical things even though in your mind you know what you have to do. I do the same thing, even one month later, I find myself asking why why why, and it just opens the wounds up again. Sometimes knowing the truth isn't better, but people are naturally curious anyway. Ignorance is bliss. I won't lie to you, I'm going through hell now, and I'm sure you feel like it too. There is nothing wrong with a good cry. Even guys need it sometimes. When the pain is too much, just let it out. It can hurt so much holding the pain to yourself
  12. hurtbylove
    It's possible to have not woken up, 7am is pretty early Best way to find out is to ask her what happened. She might not be telling the truth or not, but at least try to read her body language and figure out what is going on.
  13. hurtbylove
    Um, I hope you aren't stringing along two of your ex-boyfriends and trying to look for someone new. As long as you make it clear to your exes that they won't get beyond the friend level, it's ok I guess. But it's really still not advisible. It's really not fair to those two guys that are trying to get you back and you are thinking of pursuing someone else. But as long as you make clear your position on EVERYTHING, I guess it's ok
  14. hurtbylove
    Asking for someone to be your g/f is like a leap to commitment. I think things end up better if they progress slowly and both parties are sure about what they want. Hang out more, enjoy each others' company. There shouldn't be any hurry to give the "relationship" an official title.
  15. hurtbylove
    It's cliche but it can happen when you least expect it. People often meet in the strangest places.. Just make small talk and get some way to contact them and go from there.
  16. hurtbylove
    Um, I wouldn't be too hasty to jump to conclusions. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with checking out other people, it's a natural thing. Now if you started flirting with said person, then lines start to get crossed. Guys will be guys, especially when they are around friends. Have you approached your boyfriend about this issue and how it makes you feel uncomfortable? When I used to be with my girlfriend she used to ask me stuff like do you think she is cute or whatever.
  17. hurtbylove
    It's fine if you both agree too it. But if you are expecting a certain outcome of this, you could be disappointed if it doesn't go your way. Why did you guys break up and is it an issue you can resolve?
  18. hurtbylove
    It shouldn't really matter what you define the event to be. Could be a little awkward but just call her to say hi and carry on conversation a bit. Then ask her to go out sometime. Did you feel any chemistry between the two of you? It is possible that the banquet would be too chaotic for you to get to know each other really. Just go for it and see what happens. You'll be kicking yourself later on if you don't
  19. hurtbylove
    I would keep in contact with her, but definetly don't sit around waiting for her relationship to end. If her relationship isn't going to work out, it'll end of its own accord. You shouldn't have to do anything about it. Just let it play its course.
  20. hurtbylove
    The balance of power shifts when people get older, generally to the mans' favor. Girls want to work out their experimentation, find themselves when they are young. Once they get older, they aren't as attractive physically and are more looking to settle down, have a family. Once a family is started, they shouldn't be thinking of straying, cheating. Men generally have a better position to negotiate when they are older, have money and status. Whoever has the power can make the decisions.
  21. hurtbylove
    Thank you for that. It's been one month since we parted and I still feel pain, the wound is slowly healing though. We are not alone in our suffering.
  22. hurtbylove
    I know exactly how you feel. It hurts me still after 1 month of being apart from her. It really does get better though, hang in there. You feel like you are dying now but slowly you will be reborn. There are happier days ahead believe it or not. I know what you mean by how can the one you love reject all the things you are trying to give. All I wanted was for her to be happy... Many people are going through the same thing you are, you aren't alone in this. Talking with other people helps a lot. It hurts to sleep in the same bed we slept in together, alone now. I miss her so much, but I still have to move on.
  23. hurtbylove
    Yes, it is amazing how quickly people can change. Emotions can come on very strong, and fade just as easily I have discovered.
  24. hurtbylove
    You need to take a step back from things and really let it settle down before you jump into something new. Was your breakup mutual? Do you think your ex would object to your dating his cousin? (It would be kind of awkward in some ways) How well do you know his cousin? Like did you guys hang out, talk or whatever. Try to talk out your situation to a (or several) trusted friends, it helps a lot to get some opinions. Take a deep breath and s l o w down.
  25. hurtbylove
    You know your girl best. Really some girls think it's really scary to have an ex still pursing and others think it's cute and are playing hard to get. It's usually not a good thing to keep trying. Learn from your experiences and move on.
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