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sisterlynch

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Everything posted by sisterlynch

  1. sisterlynch
    Why are you trying to be celibate? Why don't you try to meet some one to have a relationship with?
  2. sisterlynch
    Ask your husband what is the number one fantacy for men to have while masturbating
  3. sisterlynch
    If she still doesn't have a boyfriend the next time you see her look deeply into her eyes and if she too gazes deeply into your eyes without looking away, give her a kiss. Ask her if she is interested in being your girlfriend. ETC.
  4. sisterlynch
    How about getting a new girlfriend. Most girls love the challenge of competition!!
  5. sisterlynch
    Back off. If you were meant to be together he would have done more than just stare deeply into your eyes.
  6. sisterlynch
    Lightningbird and Onlygirl, you are both right in your thinking. My husband and I have been through this. Stand up for yourself. If his anger is frightening you tell him. He should not be going out or seeing other girls. If it is the internet that is the problem see if he will discontinue using it. Only girl, if you can get in touch with this other girl, it may be helpful to tell her you are unhappy with his behavior. He ignores your feelings and puts her as a priority over you. That does not make a healthy relationship. Jackie, don't let your emotions get the better of you. Talk to him openly about what you are seeing and feeling. Sometimes when you confront them with your emotions too often it can lessen the blow, but do tell him how you are feeling. Sometimes that is good enough. Let us all know how things are going for you. We are all here to support you through it. It won't be easy. Make him listen to you. He will if he really cares. Joanie at email removed
  7. sisterlynch
    Don't pay too much attention to the jealousy. Just say to yourself that is a part of his personality that you can live without. Try to speak with him openly and honestly. Make his feelings a priority. Don't stop living...you must be the person that you are going to with or without him.
  8. sisterlynch

    Help

    sisterlynch replied to EricSweden's topic in Jealousy

    Please see someone who can help you concerning your feelings. Girlfriends cannot complete you if you are not a whole person to begin with. We are all creatures of habit and when things don't go our way we can act out. Cutting yourself is pretty desperate and you should seek advice from professionals. No body can tell you how to feel about yourself except you. Be good!!
  9. sisterlynch
    If she wants to date other people let her go. She needs to explore herself by being with other people. There are plenty of nice girls here in California. Let yourself go with your own bad self. Be all that you can be and she just may return when she is tired of being used. Or she may find that her friend was better suited to her and wouldn't you feel horrible for holding her back from her one true love.
  10. sisterlynch
    My husband started to look at porn on the internet and stopped being intimate with me as much. That really made me put on weight. I was depressed and started eating since I wasn't getting sex. The final straw was when he wanted to see (a second) very thin tall dark-haired coworker for drinks and what ever! I lost control, stopped eating so much, then when I started acting jealous, we started to make love all the time...almost constantly. Since then I have continued to lose weight as I am exercising everyday. I sometimes wonder why he didn't just encourage me to get healthy and lose weight without the added drama? Maybe he did and I didn't notice?
  11. sisterlynch
    Most men like black pumps, stockings and short skirts. Most women look at your shoes to make judgements about your personal habits.
  12. sisterlynch
    I would recommend not persuing her. She is not looking for a relationship with you. If you want her to be interested in you...get a girlfriend of your own. For some reason women are attreacted to guys that have girlfriends.
  13. sisterlynch
    I think there is something really wrong with her. She obviously knows that you like her but she just doesn't care. She is interested in the guy who is already in a relationship with someone else? What does that say about her? She doesn't want a real relationship. She just wants to see a bunch of men who are free and willing to take her places. There isn't enough to her to need someone to complete her. So she looks in unlikely places for a relationship. For her it is common sense--If a guy has a relationship then he must be worth it. He is really no different than you except that he is willing to commit to helping his girlfriend through life with the comfort of his presense. Try and get over her on your own. She will like you a lot better when you show her who you are and what you can do to help her.
  14. sisterlynch
    He clearly doesn't love you. He left you for no reason! Why stand by while he cheats? Don't argue with him, ignore him. Get on with your own life and learn from your mistakes. By the time you have cleared your head and moved forward, he will be back.
  15. sisterlynch
    What is cyber-dating exactly? Do you actually meet people this way or only talk through the internet?
  16. sisterlynch
    I chose relationship! I have never been so happy as I have of late. I was a teacher in my earlier life and now I stay home and take care of the house, my husband and one son. I go swimming for exercise and relaxation, I take a psychology course at the local community college and I feel as happy as I can be.
  17. sisterlynch
    I disagree with two of your statements and I think that you are kidding yourself if you feel that you are a grown woman and are able to love someone who you don't respect and have sex with another. That is crazy! You are making yourself crazy by your actions and lack of judgement. Could you be an alcoholic or depressed? Feelings cannot be role-played? What do you think that you are doing? You act one way with your husband and act another with your lover? That is not role-playing? What about having sex with your lover right in front of your husband? What do you think that your husband is doing when you are always ending up in the arms of his skating buddies!
  18. sisterlynch
    Do you know the old saying where there is smoke there is fire? Why does he need to spend an hour and 1/2 every night with her? Why is he spending time with a loose woman? Ask him to go to counciling or you go alone. This is a very big problem. You could end up with AIDS and die. Is his job worth the end or your relationship or the both of you living with a sexually transmitted disease? Get him to work for another company where there isn't so much drama! You don't need that much stress in your life. Don't take yourself for granted. You are worth something and you know that you can do better. Get out of that relationship as soon as you can. See how he likes feeling abandoned.
  19. sisterlynch
    Since you are only in that country for a short visit, then what you have done probably will not have any lasting effect for you in your other relationship. Since this is the end of Oct. You probably got together with you original boyfriend again and I bet that you told him. If you two are still together at this point then you probably have worked out your differences by now. Remember that you are an adult and you are capable of making adult decisions. The guy in the other country meant nothing to you. He looked good at the time, but it was an affair that you can live with. How has it redefined how you feel now in your current relationship?
  20. sisterlynch

    Internet

    sisterlynch replied to onlygirl's topic in Infidelity

    Try to picture what the worst thing that he may be doing is...he is going into chat rooms for the purpose of meeting one night stands...Just keep that possibility in your consciousness for a few minutes while you contemplate your feelings about him, your relationship and your future choices. How would you treat him if this were real? Ignore him completely? Make plans to leave him? Are you contemplating marriage to him in the future or someone else? Make your choice based upon what is the highest level of infidelity that you could tolerate and remain in the relationship with him, and go with it. He may get off on the risky behavior and the lying that goes with it...Under no circumstances should you put up with his risky behavior. He is most clearly a taker. Someone who takes without giving. Don't put up with it anymore. If you are living with him without marriage then he probably feels like you are willing to put up with almost anything and that will help him continue his risky behavior.
  21. sisterlynch
    There is no real way of predicting how this will end. If you are willing to be in this sort of relationship for the time that he gives you more power to you. You and he both seem to enjoy the time that you spend together. You really should see other people on the side however. This man is tied in a relationship for the wrong reasons, but so are you. You get sex and a friendship from him while his wife sits home wondering where he is. This man has his cake at home yet chooses to go out to ice cream with you. He is cheating on you by staying in the relationship with his wife! Don't you want someone who is there for you when the chips are down. If you were in a disfiguring accident what do you think his reaction would be? Don't you wonder when he has made love to his wife or how he treats her to make her put up with this type of affair? Don't you want the confidence that comes from manipulating relationships so that you always win?
  22. sisterlynch
    This is tough to do. She would have to be totally confortable in the place you have chosen, house, car or what ever. Both of you would need to be really ready and willing to make it work! It can cause friction problems if there is a lack of lubrication. I think it is better to communicate your concerns to her. Tell her how she would feel a physcial release of tension. The problem with orgasm is that it can increase the likelihood of going further than she really is ready. If you two have made it a year and a half without going all the way you deserve a prize! Get married or get engaged. That may make it easier for her to feel that you will stick around after consumation. Yes, I think that is the key...let her know that if she wants to orgasm or not you will love her just the same. Do you communicate with her this way? Or do you worry too much about her physically? Make sure she is comfortable that you won't dump her in the future. Even if you think she knows this girls like to hear little speeches about how sexy they are and how special she makes you feel. It is really up to her. It sounds like she is saving herself for marriage and she is not sure if you are the one! Make yourself a promise to love her no matter what the outcome may be.
  23. sisterlynch
    We all love our partners and we all have hang ups concerning sex...There is a show on Oxygen called "The Sunday Night Sex Show." 11 - 12 am everynight. It is an older Canadian woman who talks to callers about sexual problems. I really like listening to her alternative viewpoint. Men have these urges that are difficult to control. They were taught by society to be selfish and keep quiet about their sexual energy. That is why they hide it. Why don't you delete the pictures from the computer, throw out the magazines and only keep the pornography that you can tolerate. When he comes looking for them tell him there is a new sheriff in town and he will have to live up to a new code of honor. Tell him sincerely how you feel about what he is doing and tell him you want more and better sex from now on or he cannot watch any pornography at all. Tell him that he needs to see you as the object of his affection, not the women in the magazines. Tell him you know when he has been masturbating because he looks or acts diiferently, and that makes you uncomfortable. Good luck, stick with it -- it will come easier over time. Joanie email removed
  24. sisterlynch
    Get over yourself. Be her lover. That is what she wants. She doesn't want some alcoholic boytoy or a father figure. She probably cannot tell you what she wants but take it from me, she needs a red hot lover right now. Get a babysitter for the weekend, take her to the coast and get rid of all those feelings that you have been harboring for her. She made a mistake. She is clearly telling you that. Take stock in your life just this once and make an exception. You will teach your children a lesson that they cannot get from boyscouts or in school--how to be a MAN!! Life is full of ups and downs...dig deep into your heart...the answer is hidden under all the PC garbage that society teaches us about being unavailable to the other sex...get rid of that BS. Go to her -- get down on your knees and recommit to this perfect individual who brought out the best in you once...let that person reemerge from your dead soul. That crush on her will slowly return and you can be the man that she needs and you will be all the better for it!!
  25. sisterlynch
    I would recommend staying out of their life. If they wish to contact you they can. Maybe you and Monica can still be friends and I hope that you do. But jealousy is a very powerful emotion, and can make a friendship into something more than you had intended. Sanjay was your friend but he also betrayed you by not trusting you. I hope that you will frogive him for his outragious behavior, but I would recommend never contacting either of them again. Just try to put the entire thing behind you. Look to the future and forget the past. Everyone you meet is a potential friend or lover. Make clear categories for yourself. I think this is a boundaries issue. We all learn a script of behavior when we are young...this sets up our expectations as we develop our love lives. Find other friends who are more liberal--like you. Be careful if you feel yourself coming between people like that.
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