WildChild
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Everything posted by WildChild
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I think that sounds perfect I'm assuming you're posing this as an email?
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Geez, that's hard to say. You know her best so I don't know exactly how to approach it. I think the truth is the best, but she may think "Oh, he called me on accident?" and be hurt/mad/upset by that and obviously you don't want to make her feel like she was an after thought. I guess, how do you think she would react if you called or emailed her what happened? I guess too, it depends on how well or bad the relationship ended.
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Agree with you as well Poco
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I agree with Annie24. First I was going to say that he may be getting too close to you and so he is pulling back. I read somewhere that men will do that before they step into the next level. But then, I started reading about how you don't seem to be too keen on some of his behavior, and then when I read your last post about him being so mad, I would certainly not waste my time sitting by phone waiting for him. He may have felt you were telling him what to do, but girlfriend he has been sending you some pretty darn big red flags, and this last episode should be enough for you to thank your lucky stars that you don't have to deal with the BS anymore.
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First and foremost welcome to EnotAlone You have two options. You can try to get past this, and let it go. Or you could call her back and apologize for just hanging up on her because you panicked. There are three possibilities why you haven't heard back: 1) She doesn't have caller ID (or had it before and now doesn't) so she doesn't even know it was you; 2) She didn't call back because you hung up on her; or 3) She didn't call you back because she chose not to. I don't think it is wrong that you kept her number (some do/some don't), and obviously if this is the first time you have dialed her in almost a year, I believe it was an accident.
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OK, this is going to be off the wall, but it could be a possibility. First, he runs into his ex. They say hi, start talking "How are you" kind of thing. There had been a lot of animosity between them along with avoiding each other, which most of the times happens. As they talk, he or she realized that the other isn't so bad. Yeah we broke up, but he/she is not the monster I had in my head since the breakup. To make peace, so there is not so much tension in the future, one of them (he or she) says "Hey, I'm sorry it ended the way it did." Meaning, the arguing, the not calling to even let the other one know it was done, or whatever horrible thing happened at the very end of the relationship--->the icing on the cake that led to them to not talk for however long. It doesn't necessarily mean "Hey I'm sorry it ended the way it did cause I still have feelings for you" it could just be a "nicety" to end the future formalities and animosity. His not telling you about her being at the party until 5 mins before that probably has everything to do with how you would or would not react. First, he may think I really want her to go to this party with me but if she knows the ex is there she will never go. Second, knowing that he made "amends" with is ex obviously may not sit comfortable with you. Making amends is not the end of the world, but actually a positive step within one's self to rid any hatred or animosity you feel, which wears on anyone after time. It takes a lot of energy to hate/dislike someone. As for the thing on MySpace, I have no clue. Since it something that you and anyone else can access and see, then approach him about it. You have every right as his gf to ask what that comment means .
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As much as you love your kids, and you want them to be happy, staying in a marriage that you do not want any longer is not the best thing for anyone now or in the future. I agree with the other posts about talking with an attorney. On the nonlegality end of it, only you can decide if you want your marriage. But staying just because of the children, I don't think that is a reason to work on a deadend marriage.
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Did you use a condom or spermicide? Either one of those can cause allergic reactions.
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Very sensible
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Just remember, Karma has a way of coming around.
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Nope, I think him apologizing whether it was through an email or not was the best thing. This does show her that no matter how hurt she is, he is still concerned how his decision/actions have hurt her. And it shows more character to step up and apologize. She may be hurt, and she may never want to see or speak to him again, but at least he took responsibility for it.
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So angry right now. Betrayed!
WildChild replied to FoxLocke's topic in Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender
Absolutely awesome! I knew your Mom would come around, and that she acknowledges that your "wicked siblings" influenced this. I am so happy for you, do keep us posted. -
Ah ha Good for you for sticking to your guns about the gifts. I'm sure you felt a lot better knowing you were helping children like you wanted to in the first place. You got a lot going for ya Lost, with everything going on right now you are still keeping a cool head. Good for you!
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Well, that's the thing about accepting it as a crush. Sometimes crushes never go away, but you accept them for what they are and I dunno, it seems like it makes easier and eventually most crushes do go away. Just think of it like this, after graduation you will be moving away, making it easier to forget about it.
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Well, you had a huge "crush" on him, and that's o.k. Maybe if you look at it as a crush, and nothing else, it might help you accept the situation as it is right now.
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Step up to the plate. I'm not suggesting you go back to her just to keep her out of the pain she is experiencing, but step up and apologize. Let her know you feel bad for all of this, and you really did not want to hurt her even though that's what happened. You hope someday she will forgive you, but that it is better to walk away now than to hurt her even more down the road.
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Reading your previous posts, this has been a back and forth relationship. He has lied to you on numerous occasions, and you admit that you were starting to find others attractive. Men operate on different levels. They don't sit around and think about things to the extent that women do. They keep themselves busy so they don't think about it. Right now you are assuming that he is moving on, and in the process making things worse for you because it is all an assumption. Plus, you did tell him you didn't want to see or speak to him again. It is normal to miss someone, however what you are failing to remember is you weren't happy towards the end. Concentrate on healing yourself, and not worry about what he is doing or what he may be thinking.
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I agree with DN. In addition, there is emergency assistance and if you have access to a telephone you can contact them for what resources there are to assist you and your child.
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Got it LOL Now that you explained it further I think you're right on key. Hmmm, I will have to go back and look. I don't recall you mentioning her being a music teacher, but if it was a lost cause then so be it. Now that I'm thinking about it, how did everything work out with your Mother and the Christmas gift thing? That was about the time you mentioned this other gal too. Of course there's potential love out there for you...you've got a good head on your shoulders
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My children; Hearing children's laughter; Holding my loved ones; Knowing how far I have come since my divorce; Seeing or hearing that someone I care about is happy.
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I'm not saying waste your time for when she commit as a gf, but I certainly wouldn't give up your friendship with her entirely either. I mean really, how do ya think that is going to look. You know what my thought would be: "Oh, I see. Since I can't date him right now, then he doesn't even want to be friends. Musta only had one thing on his mind!." What happened to this girl from Christmas time?
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I'm normally the hopeless romantic (ask anyone), but I have to say this really comes through as a one night stand. Whether a one night stand, or she realized after the sex that it wasn't going to work, or whatever....if this was someone who slept with me and then basically avoided me from there on out, you know what people would be saying? He used you If it walks like a duck, looks like a duck, and sounds like a duck, it's a duck. Try this. Don't contact her anymore. See what happens. How long before she will call you? And when she does, I would bet the farm it is for one thing: sex. Then see how long afterwards it takes for this cycle to begin all over.
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So angry right now. Betrayed!
WildChild replied to FoxLocke's topic in Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender
You're darn right it was worth it! You can go to bed at night knowing that from now on you are not living someone else's life or conception of who they think you should be. Just remember, if they weren't your family you woulda gotten rid of them along time ago, and now you have more reason to distance yourself from them, at least your siblings. -
I think this is bothering you wa-ay more than you are letting on. You are only lying to yourself right now, and you need to stop phoning everyone involved or soon you will lose them as well. Leave your ex alone for now, and let him breath. Keep your trip cancelled, and don't phone him, text him, email him or otherwise...including her. You are very rapidly ruining any chance of salavaging this friendship at all. The more you do this stuff, the more disrespect he is going to have for you.
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I would have to say, based on what you have told us, and I could be wrong, but I think you basically got duped with a one night stand