hopelesscase

I think the best route is as other people have stated, start to eat healthy together and do exercise together, go for walks at the weekend or join the gym together, that way it is not saying she is overweight but helping you both get fitter and healthier. My partner is overweight and it does not bother me what she looks like is the person that counts, but we do try to eat healthly and go for walks, try different sports makes it fun for both of us and we both benefit.

Hey I was where you are about 4 yrs ago, thinking I was gay but not knowing for sure, then I found a great website called the pink sofa, it is great friendly site where you can meet other lesbians, I dont no where you live but they have a lot of social going on in Australia and UK they have some americans on as well although I dont know how widely used it is by them. I have made a lot of friends through this site as well as my first gf and my current gf, there are lots of forumns where you can ask for advice and lots of other women who are in the same situation as you, I think it is great to have a place where you can go to vent and talk about stuff in a friendly environment. For me I always has stronger feelings for women but never wanted to accept it or let people know as it was wrong (according to society) but since I came out, my parents and my friends have been great and I feel so much better and more confident being able to be me and not thinking about hiding a part of me all the time. Feel free to msg me if ya want, but deffo check out the pink sofa!!!

I met this really great woman 3 weeks ago (we had been in contact via email for a while) we have really connected and get on very well, everything seems so comfortable with her. We have only been apart for 3 nights in the 3 weeks. The way I feel with her is different to in other relationships, it jus all feels comfortable and fun and nice, but I dont get the butteflies in my stomach and I am not constantly thinking about her and planning our future......does this mean it is not right or do you not need to have this? I feel like I want her to move in with me as we spend so much time together anyway it would seem a natural progression even though we have not been going out for long. I know she is very gone on me and ready to sign up to a long term contract, but I am not sure if I am, I feel like I should have the butterflies...I did with previous gfs...I dont want to lead her on as she has been really hurt in the past, do people normally end up with the person they get on really well with and have lots in common with is that enough?

I feel really bad for saying this, and I hate that I feel this way, jus wanted peoples thoughts..... I have recently met a really nice women, we met online, started chatting online, have a lot in common, get on really well etc etc.....We arrange to meet up, she was always very cagey bout sending a pic, but eventully I got one and she was (not wow got to have her now, but equally not urgh getme out of here), we meet up, she is large (I know she was before we met, but she did lie about how big she was), anyways I have never been attracted to larger people (please dont have a go...cant help it...everyone has there type...and yes I know you should look beyong the physical and go for the personality..), but we do get on really well, when we were talking all I could think about was kissing her lips...so now I am in a dilema, i do like her, but I dont want to lead her on, I dont know if I can get over my feelings about her size (i shudnt hav a hang up about it anyways Im overweight myself) I want to giv things a go see where they end up, but she hs fallen for me bigtime, and she has ben hurt in the past by people not seeing beyond her size/looks...I can relate to and understand where she is coming from which makes it harder as I really dont want to hurt her, or make her think more is there, but I just dont know what to do about it....i think I will come accross wrong if I try to exlpain how i feel to her.....i dunno....HELP!!

I think you should be honest with her about how you feel, I hate it when people just start to ignore me and giv me some lame excuse because thay are to cowardly to tell the truth, it may seem harsh but people will respect you for it in the long run!

Everything your not spose to do, Slept with her on 3rd date, got all serious, thought i had scared her off so panicked and started trying to get her back, probably appeared as needy and clingy wanting to see her all the time, reacting badly when she said she was busy etc etc etc..... A lot of this was due to the fact that I was not really over my ex, but kidding myself that I was, but I am deffo over the ex now!

So the woman I scared off has been chatting online to me again, and we have even met up a couple of times, with other friends (she seems reluctant to meet me on our own) and we have plans for manchester pride weekend and another night out (again with other people). It seems she was prob telling the truth and was just busy, as the course she is doing ends next month, but she has signed up for more!!! So how do I play this, to show her I am not the scary needy person who she met before? How do I get her back on side?

I agree with the others, jus tell her how you are feeling, I have been there with gay friends who I liked, and most want to continue with the friendship, altho it can be a bit weird at first. If there is a good friendship there which it sounds as though there is, then regardless of whether she likes you to or not the friendship will remain. Go for it, tell how you feel you will jus go mad other wise!!!

Thanks PRSOV, think I beginning to think the same as you. I know she does hav a lot on, shes got 2 young boys, is doing an open uni course and is involved in local politics so that doesnt leave much free time!! Her latest reply: Sorry all i can say is if i freee iw ill cal n see if u r, av got to put as much effort as i can in 2 uni is my way out of a crap job lol So guess I jus hav to accept that it is not there at the moment but not rule anything out for the future and jus get on with things....easier said than done tho!?

Previous post So I txt her: R u ok? Have I done something to scar you off, is jus that every time I try to c u ur busy and you never ask me or sugguest another time Her Reply: No it jus I am busy n av no free time. Put all free time into studying My response: So how are we spose to develop a friendship if you are always busy, maybe I cud do stuff wi u n ur mates somtime if that is easier, and you know I am happy to go camping n do stuff wi you n your kids Have not had a response to this one....so there is a friendship/something there but how can you have a friendship if you never meet each other????? What would you do???

I want whatever she wants, if that is jus friendship then I am fine with that. Well obviously her friendship must mean more to me than it does her or I would be more of a priority to her, but that doesnt mean it isnt there. She has geniune enough reasons not to meet up, and in her emails she makes it seem as though she does want to meet up, she is not the sort of person to mess people around, my guess is she doesnt know how frustrated I am, and rather than confront her about it I jus keep on which obviously was the wrong move. I have asked her in the past about the friendship and she has always said it is there......unless I have messed up more since...who knows......my mates tell me to leave her alone and see what she does, but Im not good at doing that, as I think that if I go NC then she will think I am no longer interested and give up on me, so how do I proceed?

IF she is not interested in friendship why would she say, she thought we could be good friends and keeps hinting at meeting up, and always responds to my txts/messages if you werent interested you wouldn't do that, would you?

The short version, met girl, liked girl, girl liked me, got to serious to soon, girl ran a mile. Girl stayed in touch saying she wanted friends, I went along with it, even though I wanted more. Hav been in contact with girl via email and txt, she always responds, go frustrated coz she was always busy when I wanted to meet up with her, confronter her and asked what was going on, she said she wanted friends as she wasnt ready for a relationship, and wasnt avoiding me........ a few months later I am still in the same boat, whenever I ask her to meet up she has a reason not to...... when I got annoyed before cut contact and after a week she sent me a email.....so it seems there is something there.....what to do now.. 1. Send her a email saying how am getting frustrated and whats going on 2. Send her a email saying how I feel and what I want from her, and why I think we are compatible and leave it up to her to get in touch when she is ready for a relationship 3. Give up on her, go no contact again see how she reacts 4. Any other options...

I do realise I hav a good life, I have friends, a job, own my own house etc, I know I have more than some, but it still feels like I am missing something that these happy people have!?

Why is it some people are always happy, and think positievly about everyting, and others appear miserable and unhappy. I am one of the latter, people always make comments like Cheer up whats the worse tha can happen etc etc, which only makes me feel worse, I wnt to be one of those people who are always happy and dont tlet things get them down and are happy with there lot, but I am not sure how to get there? Can someone enlighten me?