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freedom

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Everything posted by freedom

  1. freedom
    if she can say's that she is going to end the relatonship in 8 months then she has given you a CLEAR SIGNAL that she isnt into you. As a guy, i will say this. There is nothing worst then being used, there nothing worst then giving someone love that doesnt give you the same back. Reason is that it WILL effect your selfworth, DON'T let that happen. Maybe it is best end control the situation and End it.
  2. freedom

    moving on

    freedom replied to Jacl's topic in Breaking Up Advice

    Here is my 2 cents worth.... Moving on is when you stop measuring yourself and youself worth against him and his views. Moving on is when you stop thinking about him. Moving on is when you are able to make decisions because you want to and not have the decision based on anything to do with him. Moving on is when he stop having playing anypart in your life. Moving on is when you stop coming here (ENA) asking/Talking about him. You are getting there.. but you are still measuring yourself against YOU in your pass relationship.
  3. freedom
    OK.. some saykick him to the curb .. and i would disagree.. Let look at some things here that are important to him. HIS MOM just passed away! He is in an emotional roller coaster, He WILL be a wrecked state of mind. Seriously, you have to realise that this isnt easy for him! Yes he should have told you that he needed to talk, but when someone is going through so much pain they tend to miss out on things and sometimes say stupid and mean things. Understanding a patience is required. You have to understand that if the relationship ends is not because of YOU, it is because of the situation. Finally, it is up to you to decide to continue this relationship (friendship or lovers). Remember. relationships goes through all kind of trials, if you both go through this and still stay together GREAT better for the relaitonship BUT only you wil know whether it is worth it or not. No one else can tell you this. Listen to you inner self. Trust yourself, it will give you strenght. Good luck
  4. freedom
    Sorry to hear that...
  5. freedom
    Cruise .. wait and see... Your action and your choices. THis is his time now. I dont recommend pressuring him now. Watch and give him what he needs as a friend is my advice. Put the relationship aside.
  6. freedom
    easiest way out..... i was caught in the moment and my heart spoke before my brain. I'm keen on you lets see where this goes.
  7. freedom
    Don't listen to everyones adivce. It only confuses you. Pick a person that you respect for their decisions and ask their opinion. The rest is up to you, your principles and you conscience. Make your own decisions and done listen to others.
  8. freedom
    Your choices, your actions. YOu know what is right and wrong you can figure it out. What is done is done and cannot be changed. What CAN be done is to use you HEAD and principles and move on to a different environment which will be better for you.
  9. freedom
    you are not his saviour. Figure it out.
  10. freedom
    Sometimes in life we look for people for advice. I te end we have to help ourselves. Think about the consequences of our action and make your own decision. It is free will and that is the thing that makes us stronger. In the end we each have to make our decisions and stand by it. It is the indecision that makes us weak and feel anxiety. Make your own decision and dont depend on others to 'help' you out because in the end you have to stick by your decision be it good or bad. It is removing the indecision that makes us strong. Listening to too many people only confuses you and increases the potenial for indecisions. Focus and take responsibility.
  11. freedom
    his choice his life.. you should NOT try to control him because you do NOT like it. it is up to him. stiop judging him. He doesnt do it all the time. give him some room, you are not his mother. I would put this under unfair expectations. In his life he had his friends before you, just because you enter the scene doesnt make it right that he has to give it up.
  12. freedom
    "In some cases I like control and in some cases I do not. Just depnds on my mood or how I'd like to feel" Shivers.. a typical answer from a women!!!!! basically.. read my mind and my mood.... Learn ESP!! Be scared... Be afraid... be very afraid. It can swing either way mate. 50/50 chance.
  13. freedom
    Some facts: it will never be the same.. it will never go back to the way it was.. Reason, For what ever reason you guys ended the relationship before, i assume that both of you discussed it and decided to fix the problem that ended the relationship in the first place. If so, your relationship would never be the same as changes has been made. If not, you know the problem will arrise again and again and that is why you are getting anxiety. Which then make the relationships dynamic change. Irrigardless your relationship has changed, I hope it is for the better and not the worst. Accept it. If you keep holding on to the old expectations you will only cause yourself and the relationship stress. Change your expectations in the relationship, because it needs changing.
  14. freedom
    is dating casually considered to be single or a relationship? is single really being single or does it mean that you have casual relationships on the side thus not being single. Sometimes i wonder when people say that "i prefer to be single" when what they are really saying is i am selfish and the casual relationships that comes my way are nothing at all (i am using them) thus it isnt a relationship because i am not putting any effort into it. (don't care about what the other half feels) OR does it really mean that you are totally not interested in any relationship casual or long term. That you are a 'good' person and do not use people at all (not even for sex). I dont know, does the term 'being single' now adays really mean what it is cut out to be, or are we choosen single people just users?? Ponder that.....
  15. freedom
    For every question you ask, accept that the worst answer is 'NO'. After that anything else is better. So, always ask, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
  16. freedom
    "make him want a serious relationship with me" Simple one word answer.... NO. Silly question IMO, I remember thinking the same thing being in the same situation once. You and i know that we cant make anyone do anything. More effective statement is, "I should tell him that i want to deeper relationship with him and see what happens there."
  17. freedom
    what does your IQ have to do with it? mines is 123.
  18. freedom
    you know that you are doing something majorly WRONG. i think you should actually go on a 'break' away from both of these men to be able to figure out what you want. Do a NC for both these men and let yourself breath as you are confusing being able to attract other men to actuality of love. Take a few weeks away from these guys and get your ead striaght. Mean while stay away from the LOVER to avoid the risk of hurting your relationship any further.
  19. freedom
    my advice, Leave her alone. Sometimes in life we do things that are stupid and regret it. There are no ways to repair the mistakes. we can only learn from it. You have to forgive yourself for your mistake and accept that it isnt only your call to be friends with this person. Unfortunately she has choosen not to be your friend thus you have to accept and move on.
  20. freedom
    Are you a person that when a problem occurs, immediately thinks of ways to solve a problem and moves on OR are you a person that thinks and thinks of why the problems occurred a tries to end the stem so that the problem doesnt occur again. Balance is required, but by observation, i suppose that most people after a breakup tends to be the second option because they refuse to let go. What do you think?
  21. freedom
    to be honest, from what you say, i think you are not ready for this kind of relationship. One thing about this kind of relationship is the FACT that she has kids. Your dreams of trvelling and holidays are not realistic in this situation. She has kids! She cannot just drop them and leave and if she did she is not a good quality mother and thus would you really want to be with her??? Having kids comes with HUGE responsiblities, as a mother SHE has choosen and thus cannot back out. As a boyfriend in a relationship has not gone 100% such as moving in and accepting the kids you have a choice. If you are not ready, i would advice you to move away from the relationship, reason being is that you will not only hurt 1 person, you will hurt 3 persons! not only that, you WILL leave an impression with 2 young girls. Remember, the situation are as they are, IT WILL NOT CHANGE. You have to accept that way of life. The responsiblities and scarifices are huge! and IF you arent ready for them, get out of the situation even though you like her. IF and i say IF you are ready, I wish you well.
  22. freedom
    basically get off the computer and go to sleep. Posting only takes more time more time away. Waitig for a rply wastes more time.
  23. freedom
    i am just wondering. Why have you decidied to change his habits now after the marriage? you knew he loves his games before you married him. I hope you arent thinking that you can change his habit to what YOU like, cause you know that it doesnt work like that.
  24. freedom
    lesbians, to be honest, most of the ones i know have more a porblem with me as a man then me having a problem with them. I sometimes feel that they have a beef with the male spieces
  25. freedom
    i the end of the day, Tiremn is allowed to have his point of view(POV) whether you believe it or not is not the point. Like other post out there like what is your BF flaw" it is about a POV. It is rediculus the you all are trying to prove him wrong. He isnt wrong, he has his point of view, like i have mypoint of view, like everyone else has a pont of view. He doesnt have to try to prove something to everyone. Talking about statistics, every one know that statisticscan be skewed some way or another, form the point of collection to the point of analyzing the data itself. If everyone just relied on statistics we would be bloody accountants and we all know what fun they are!!.. It is just a POV and some poeple agree with it and some dont. It is about experiences. Just because it hasnt happened to you doesnt mean it doesnt exist.
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