JynX
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Everything posted by JynX
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Wanna know a random fact? My boyfriend's and mine 1 year is July 5th also. Aside from that pointless fact, I feel for you. Going to college in two different places will be hard, and most likely you guys will end up taking a break for a while. And that's not always a bad thing. Take a look at what else is out there. Explore. I know it feels like you want to be with him forever, but think about it, if you guys get through this and still love each other in the end, it's meant to be. But you're right, cherish the time you have with him. Did you talk to him about this yet and see how he's feeling about it? That might be a good idea. JyNx
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This sounds very familiar...I've been here before. What you're feeling is normal, even I feel it sometimes with my boyfriend of nearly a year. So what I'm trying to get to is these feeelings dont just go away and there isnt any special technique to make them go poof. To get your girlfriend excited...there's a popular subject. LoL. Well, my advice would be to kiss her neck. That seems to work for me well enough. Also, slowly caressing her thighs might work too. Does she have a "spot" that gives her shivers whenever you touch it? If she does, I sugest that, but if she doesnt, I sugest finding it, because there isnt a faster way to get a girl excited. And like I said, there isnt anything you can do to stop feeling this way. You say you're happy with what you have, and that's a good sign. The most common mistake in many relationships is looking at someone else's and building the same expectations in yours. That's a no no. If you do that, the relationship might not last. You say they've done more things than you and your girlfriend...but let me ask you this, what's the rush? My boyfriend and I didn't really start seriously messing around until about 5-6 months into our relationship. To me, the longer you wait, the more trust you build with the person, and the more comfortable you feel with them. So why rush? Relationships that start off with a lot of fooling around right away generally don't last that long anyway, simply because once you've done things, there's really nothing new to look forward to, thus people start to get bored with each other. Hope I helped. If you need anything else, feel free to PM me. JyNx
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If you're asking so many questions, maybe you're not ready to date yet?
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Feeling this way is perfectly normal and so is never having a girlfriend at 14. Here's what I think on your questions: 1. The best way to hint someone that you like them is flirting. Keep eye contact with her. Maybe sometiems touch her hand. Or you can do the old favorite direct approach: tell her and ask if she feels the same way. 2. If you dont want to use the "Will you go out with me?" line, which I too, think is overused, then you can try something like "So I was thinking about going_______(insert name of place), would you wanna go with me?" This way, it's not really asking her out directly, and you'll also find out if she's interested in you or not. Then after a few dates and getting to know each other, it's okay to use the "will you go out with me?" line. 3. So you think she might like girls? Hmm. There isnt really any way you can find this out without asking her...or one of her close friends. Do you think she likes boys? Does she flirt with them? Have you ever seen her flirt with a girl? 4. Well, at 14 I'd think it's pretty obvious to your parents that you're going to start liking girls. They went though the same thing with their parents, so trust me, it wont be a big shock to them. And whats the big deal anyway? You're of the age when you start dating...your parents know this, they're not stupid, so don't sweat it. You could try saying somehting like, " I like this girl and I was thinking about inviting her over, would that be okay?" That bluntly states you like girls. 5. Don't worry about what parents think. I dont see why they wouldnt like you if she said no. It's none of their business. And trust me, I've never seen a situation where parents didnt like someone jsut because their daughter or son turned someone down. Dont worry so much. It's not as complicated as you're making it sound. Hope I helped. If you have any other questions, feel free to PM me. JyNx
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I agree with the above poster. Choose for yourself. Which one makes you happier? When you're really sad, which one do you think about going to first? What about when you're happy? I can't say I agree with you on how you're thinking though. If you honestly love your boyfriend, shouldnt you want to pursue a relationship with him, even though it's hard, instead of taking the easy way out and jumping at the first guy you feel a strong sense of attraction to? The attraction might fade away, but if you have love with your boyfriend, shouldnt you want that to last? There really isnt a least painful way to break up wiht anyone, if you're thinking about doing that....eitherway someone will get hurt. Rules of life. You dont say how old you are, so I'm kind of shooting in the dark with this next question, but do you see a future with your boyfriend? A future thats worth going through the hardships your parents might put in the way? If yes, then I'd say stick with your boyfriend...but if no, good luck with whatever you decide...hope I helped somehow. JyNx
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I'd try kissing her neck, lightly bite her ear, or slowly run the tips of your fingers over her lower stomach. When my boyfriend does any of that, it seems to get the job done.
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No problem! Good luck with everything!
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Don't kill yourself with worry...this is all normal. From what you've written I wouldnt say that there's a problem. It's alright to not have things to talk about, sometimes nothing is going on, and thats alright. The fact that she's thinking of you is a good sign as well JyNx
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Don't you think after a week of dating someone its not enough time to say something like you can't live without him or that if he went out with someone else you'd die? Dont take this the wrong way, I'm just wondering....
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Glad I helped Well, it really depends on the two of you and how strong/weak your relationship is. It could be a good point because, like I said earlier, there's no more of trying to impress each other, that way you guys see each other for who you really are. After all, you dont have to be all over each other in public so people see you're dating right? You two already know there's a connection and thats what matters. As long as there are a few alone times when you guys are affectionate and it means something special, then I dont see a problem with it. But, it can also be a bad thing as well. Take my situation for an example. After 9 months, my boyfriends and mine affection for each other is slowly dying out. Around school we hug and hold hands and kiss every now and then, but that's about it. When we're alone though, things are much different. I see a more affectionate side of him that doesnt show up when we're around other people. Now you might ask why that can be such a bad thing...well, sometimes us girls...ok bluntly put, we think way too much. So if there isnt a certail level of public affection present in a relationship, our minds start to wander off and think things like "are his feelings going away?" "is something changing?" "why cant we be like the couple next to us who are always hugging/touching?" ...Thus we start to expect more from the relationship. That's where I am right now, and I dont like it. So we may even start thinking that what we have isn't enough and that there should be more to it...you know? That's when we start to think on how different things could be if we were with someone else and what not...sOo as you see, girls are the more complicated ones. Sorry, didn't mean to write you a book on your question...but sometimes things just come out. Need anything else, feel free to ask anytime! JyNX
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Being a girl that's been in that situation before, I wouldnt worry too much about it. 5 months into a relationship it's perfectly normal to have less public affection and less make out urges. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 9 months, and sure, we were very affectionate for a few months, but then as time goes on and you get used to the person, that urge for affection seems to lessen. There's nothing bad about it, as long as you guys like each other's company and have fun. I think the "new" in your relationship is wearing off, just like it did in mine. Now there's just a bf/gf for real; no pretending, no trying to impress each other. This is where the relationship starts to get tested, as I've learned. If I can help with anything else, feel free to IM me on xXkiSsTh3rAiNXx...hope I helped! JyNx
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DN-Yes, I do realize that, but I want more than just an easy, fun time with him. I dont want our relationship to always be classifed as that. I want to be able to connect with him and not just "have fun". Maybe this is just a chick thing...to want more in a relationship. Wish I knew.
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I need some advice on a situation I'm finding myself in. Here's some background info: I've been dating my boyfriend for a little bit over 9 months. We get along great, we've only had 2 fights in the whole time we've dated. He's one of the best people I know. I get along with his family and vise versa. We dont get to see each other as much as we'd like to, but it's enough. Now here's my issue. My two good girlfriends have both broken up with their boyfriends because of some problems and what not. I've been listening to both of them and trying to help them get over the heart break. So in doing so, I've realized something. I have a good relationship, but there's a big part that's missing. It seems each time my boyfriend and I hang out, we always fool around. There has never been a time in our whole relationship that we've ever sat down and jsut talked. There are many times now that he has to ask me "So what do you want to talk about?" when we talk. It never used to be that way. We've never had too many serious conversations either or really talked talked in person. I mean, we talk, but it's just the usual casual things like how our day went and yada yada. So now I'm left off feeling that I don't know much about him at all. I should be able to open up and just come to him with whatever's on my mind, but I sense a wall there. Right now I'm sitting here and thinking, if things continue to go how they are in our relationship, there'll always be a longing for something more, for a deeper conncetion with him. And to be honest, I dont think I can stay in this relationship long if I cant fully communicate with him and he with me. Thing is, he doesnt seem bothered by this, or atleast he hasn't said anything, so that just puts more thoughts in my head which I wont go into right now. If you guys have any thoughts, ideas, anything...please share. I'm sorry for this being long, but I had to get that out. I'd really appreciate if you could tell me what I can do or say to improve our communication and relationship. Thanks!
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To me it's always been this: if you have to ask if you're in love with someone, then most likely you're not. Your relationship with her is still pretty young so everything you described is natural; the wanting to spend time with each other and such. You both are still in the process of finding things out about each other, so this what makes the start of all relationships exciting and sometimes overwhelming. At the beginning of my relationship with my boyfriend, I questioned my feelings as well. Then one day I simply looked at him and realized that even through our troubles he's still the one guy I want to be with. I could feel my love for him. I can't really describe it. We've been together for 9 months now, and I still find my feelings grow. I guess what I'm trying to get to is there'll come a time when you'll know if you love her or not. It might not be soon, but it will come, you just have to be patient. The fact that she takes the time to paint you things is a good sign also. Like heloladies21 said, the only way to find out how she feels is to talk about it. Playing guessing games just takes too long. Being direct works much better. Good luck and I hope my giberish helps somehow!
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To me, sex is having intercourse...so no, I dont think oral sex is sex, but that's me.
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Her Gay friend; why do I feel threatened?
JynX replied to JealousJackrabbit's topic in Relationship Advice
I dont think you should leave her, it sounds like you guys have a good relationship. It's strange that she's still so attatched to her friend even after you told her it bothers you. Maybe she didnt think you were serious? I think you should try talking to her one more time, and tell her what you told us in this post. If she has strong feelings for you, it should make her stop, seeing how unhappy it makes you. If not...then I'm sorry to say, but you might want to rethink the relationship, just like italian_chick505 said. Hope I helped, if you wanna talk feel free to PM me. JyNx -
Breakdowns, and strength???
JynX replied to amour_13's topic in Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender
This reminds me of my situation a little bit. I'm familiar with these breakdowns she has, I have them every now and then. My definition of that is when I'm in that state, I tend to have many doubts about my relationship, and what my boyfriend says during that time is very important. Sometimes I need to feel wanted and sometimes I just need reassurance of his feelings for me. Maybe that's what's happening to your girlfriend. I'd say just remind her of your feelings, even when she's doing fine. They say it's the smallest things that mean the most and that's very true. The fact that she has to lie to see you adds on to those doubts she might have, so just reassure her and tell her you'll get through this. Just because she's always in need of you doesn't mean you cant let her know that you need her. That might actually distract her from her own problems for a little bit. I hope this helped somehow...if you want to talk about anything, feel free to PM me. Good luck. JyNx -
There's absolutely nothing wrong with being inexperience in the sexual area. So dont worry too much over this, everyone was inexperienced at one point or another, right? And also, if a girl is grossed out by that, then I'm sorry, but thats being immature. There's nothing wrong with it. Dont worry about this. When my boyfriend and I started dating he wasnt all too experience either nor was I...but we learned off each other. He was 16 at the time..so like I said, dont stress! JyNx
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He finally told me he loves me but.........????????
JynX replied to skittles's topic in Relationship Advice
Well...the fact that he waited to tell you he loves you is the first sign that he most likely really does. It's actually a good thing that he waited. These days too many relationships start out with people saying "I love you" after a day of dating..which as we all knwo isnt love at all. So I'd consider what he did a good thing. At the time when you told him how you felt, he most likely didnt return the feelings. But with time they grew (4 months is prenty of time for that LoL). So dont break your head over this...I think he loves you! And most guys ask the "are you jealous" questions to boost their self esteem, so I wouldnt worry too much about that either. Sounds like you have a pretty good guy, maybe a keeper. The guys who wait to admit their feelings are rare. JyNx -
I think you should talk to him about this. Maybe tell him to get help. I've had an ex boyfriend who was a lot like that and I know how you feel. Just sit him down and explain everything that you're feeling. If he really loves you, he'll take it into serious consideration. JyNx
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Hello. I need some advice. My boyfriend of 9 months is a year and a half older, and just a few weeks ago my mother voiced that she has a problem with our age difference. She's always been picky on when she lets me see him, but now she says I cant go anywhere with him because she is afraid we'll have sex and I'll get pregnant and all that usual parental drama. The thing is, she's waited until I was in this relationship for 8 months to tell me all of this, so it's not like I can jsut walk away and make her happy. My boyfriend and I havent gotten to hang out outside of school 3 weekends in a row, and I've noticed it's starting to take effect. I've started feeling distance between us. We started to talk a lot less than we used to and when we do talk, it's about pointless things. I've also noticed he's been becoming a little less affectionate in public than he used to be. I love my boyfriend, but it seems I cant stop thinking about all of this and maybe even having doubts. The last thing I want is to lose him, but my mother is making it impossible for us to see each other outside of school. So naturally it's been effecting both of us. He might not realize it yet, but I do. Any ideas on what I can do? JyNx
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One of my very good friends showed me the painful looking scars he has on his leg the other day. He explained that his parents beat him with a belt the night before for no reason at all. He also previously told me that he gets depressed, cuts himself, and just basically hurts himself on purpose. Today he wasn't himself at all. When I asked what was wrong, he told me his parents did it again, except now it was worse. He wouldn't show me the scars on his back, so I'm guessing it's pretty bad. By listening and being there for him, I feel like I'm involved in this now. My only problem is I dont know what to do or what to tell him as advice. My first impulse was to say he should call someone, but then again I dont know what further problems that would call. I really want to help him, somehow, I just dont know how exactly. Sometimes I'm left speechless after he tells me some of his history. If anyone has any ideas on what I can tell him or what I can do, please reply. It'd mean a lot to me. Thanks, JyNx
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Too ugly; Like women outside my race; Can't find love
JynX replied to Kyoshiro Ogari's topic in Dating Advice
One thing I learned over time is you're never going to find love by looking for it. Yes, I know, I'm 15, but trust me, I know what I'm talking about. Just accept your situation and stop worrying about it so much. Sooner or later you'll find someone...it's impossible not to. Everyone has the 'right' one for them, right? In school they tell me everything comes in pairs in this world, so the same can apply to this situation as well. Like they say, others cant love you until you love yourself. JyNx -
I feel sooo used please help me
JynX replied to sad7gurl14's topic in Healing After Break Up or Divorce
This guy is obviously using you for his personal pleasures. He doesn't want to have a relationship but just a "fun time" with you. You love him, but obviously he doesnt feel the same. I'm really sorry you've been put into this situation, but please get out of it. A guy like that doesnt deserve someone who loves him. All he wants out of girls is a good time. You said yourself he sleeps around. Why waste your time with someone who doesn't respect you? JyNx -
I'd say just be yourself...don't hide anything, even the fact that you're interested in her. Before my boyfriend and I started dating, we also gave each other time to get to know each other. In that time, we went on each other's family vocations, swimming, each other's houses, phone calls, talking online...just pretty much anything you can think of. It really helps to see each other outside of school. From what I've read I'd say she already has a crush on you...so be the bold one and ask her somewhere, just as friends. Or invite someone else along with you. Make it a group activity where you and her can talk and get closer in a way. JyNx