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Annoyed And Bitter

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  1. Annoyed And Bitter
    Thanks for posting your feelings!!!! Don't bottle 'em up anymore, though.... Could make you explode like a can of soda in the sun....
  2. Annoyed And Bitter
    Tell her how you feel. The worst she could do is tell you she does not share your feelings. If you care for her, be there for her no matter what her answer is. I doubt she will end a friendship based on your feelings for her. But in my opinion, telling her is the only way. At least then she knows... Good Luck
  3. Annoyed And Bitter
    Stop worrying about everyone else and start worrying about you. It is NOT their decision to make. You need to do whatever it is that is true to YOU and how YOU feel. And as far as "does she or not?" Well my dear, you won't know until you ask HER. So for the love of God stop putting so much stock in what WE have to say and start putting some in what SHE has to say. Good Luck, God Speed, and May The Force Be With You (LOL)
  4. Annoyed And Bitter
    You are definitely not the problem here. I am willing to bet a billion bucks he isn't playing games at 3 am... Take that hint, darlin I don't want to have to gt blunt there.... You have got to decide what you will and will not live with. Once you decide, tell him and stick to your guns. If he cares anything for you he will tone this down. I suggest trying to arrange certain nights when he HAS to be with you, or certain times... Whatever works for BOTH OF YOU!!! Luck and Happiness be with you
  5. Annoyed And Bitter
    Do what you need to do, sweetie. It is your life, and your choice. I would reccomend that if he asks you about them that you do not lie, though!
  6. Annoyed And Bitter
    Charmed- How did this turn into a debate between us? lol I agree that he should not have to deal with something that makes him uncomfortable. But the sad facts are that if the RINGS make him uncomfortable then the past must too... I think if he is genuinely secure in their relationship the rings will not be an issue. I will concede that wearing them on ANY hand may be a bit too close to home. Especially on a daily basis. Hence my suggestion for a compromise. I really think this can be worked out so both of these people are happy.
  7. Annoyed And Bitter
    Charmed- I was not saying he needed to put up with the rings if he is uncomfortable. I was saying that her past is a part of who she is and he needs to deal with THAT. I was simply saying that he cannot delete that part of her past. As far as the rings go, THEY'RE RINGS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! WHO REALLY GIVES A CRAP IF SHE LIKES TO WEAR THEM? She has all ready said she wears them on her RIGHT hand and that she only wears them because she likes them...
  8. Annoyed And Bitter
    There is a compromise for every situation. If he has an issue with her wearing the rings, perhaps it could be agreed that she wear them on a necklace or only on certain occasions. In the long run, this past is a part of who she is, and he needs to accept that.
  9. Annoyed And Bitter
    Sweetie, you have to do what your heart tells you is right. It is only my opinion that those who take no risks do not live, but merely SURVIVE... If you take the chance of telling her how you feel, yes she could walk away from the friendship, or turn you down. But she COULD throw her arms around your neck and super-glue herself to your hip. On the other hand, if you do not tell her you could regret it for the rest of your life. There is nothing as heart-breaking as wondering "What might have been"... But you would spare yourself possible rejection too. I suppose the question you should ask yourself is WHAT IS MORE DEPLORABLE, LIVING IN FEAR AND DOUBT AND BEING SAFE OR TAKING THAT CHANCE AND RISKING REJECTION? If you ask me, which you did in a way, I say take that chance. You never know what might happen, but love is worth DYING for, so it stands to reason it is worth risking rejection for too.... Good Luck
  10. Annoyed And Bitter
    Wear your rigs sweetheart. They are a part of your life that you want to remember. I am sure that if you explain to your new man what kind of attatchment you have to the rings he will understand. I applaud your "progressive" attitude...
  11. Annoyed And Bitter
    You have every right to your feelings. However, this sword cuts both ways, dear... "If she loves me she should quit for me"? Getting all uptight about her weight? What is that? One could also say "If you love her, you will accept her as she is"... Look, you knew what she was when you started seeing her, and you certinly knew LONG before now even if you didn't at the start. This is soley your problem. YOU are the one who is unhappy here, not her. A person has every right to smoke, eat, and drink as much as they want to, whenever they want to. (Can you tell that I am the same type your girlfriend is?) Honestly, here is my advice, with no prejudices whatsoever... You only have two choices, accept her as she is and love her despite her faults or let the relationship go... She won't (and by the way CAN'T) quit anything "for you". She has to want to and it doesn't seem that she does. Either way, get off her back about who she is... She is happy with herself, but she may not be happy with YOU if you keep it up!
  12. Annoyed And Bitter
    Tell this woman in no uncertain terms what you want and that you are not willing to settle for less. Tell her you do not want any contact with her unless and until she wants the same thing (or at least wants to work on it)... I know that love is awfully hard to let go of, but in the long run I think you will be better off by taking this approach. NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS THAN WHAT YOU DESERVE!!! Good luck
  13. Annoyed And Bitter
    It sounds to me like the prblem is not with this girl's friend, but with your girl and you. Maybe this friend is being manipulative, but your girl and yourself are the ones letting it interfere with your relationship. Furthermore, your girl is using you to fill up her empty time, and you have got to stop letting her do that to you. Tell her that you are worth more than that and you deserve better than being a part-time fling, which is exactly what you are. Your girl has some choices to make and so do you... Make them wisely, dear....
  14. Annoyed And Bitter
    Thank you so much for the concern you have shown for people's health and wallets... Good to have people like you around!!!
  15. Annoyed And Bitter
    My darling, you only have one thing on your side right now: GUT INSTINCT. I will concede that sometimes gut feelings are wrong, but really how many times have they been totally off base? I think your best bet would be to keep your guard up, just not so high as it has been... Let it down gradually. Eventually one of two things will happen... He will either prove himslf or he will prove your instincts right. Either way, I think you should tell him how you are feeling. Sometimes the best cure for all this suspicion is to open the lines of communication.. Good luck
  16. Annoyed And Bitter
    Are you really so foolish that you do not see what happened? The whole line about just loving you as a friend came immediately after you told her that you couldn't see yourself being married at this age and you were unsure of whether you would marry her. OBVIOUS DEFENSE MECHANISM!!! For the love of God tell her how you feel, however that is. (My guess is you are completely head over heels for this girl)... Don't say things you don't mean, but STOP TRYING TO PUSH HER AWAY... There is obviously something there, INVESTIGATE IT! Luck and Happiness to you both
  17. Annoyed And Bitter
    Sweetie, I think your best approach would be a direct one. It sounds like he may need a kick in the butt to get going, so I say approach this with TACT, but assertiveness... Tell him that you are starting to see things in him that you didn't see before... Ask him to a movie or coffee or something similar JUST THE TWO OF YOU.... And if all else fails, hit him over the head with a frying pan (okay don't do that, but it may take some seriously up front conversation to get him to understand) Most of all, be prepared for any anwer or thoughts he may have. This may not turn out the way you want it to, so be ready for disappointment. I doubt that will be an issue though.. Only a fool would turn down someone so thoughtful Good Luck
  18. Annoyed And Bitter
    Evaluate your feelings for this young man. Is it truly love, or is it that you have become so close to him in friendship that you believe that you love him? If you truly do love him, or have strong feelings for him then it is time for you to decide if you are willing and able to handle and accept his response, no matter what that response is. If you DO decide that you need/want to tell him, do so with thought and care. If you are too vague he may not get the hint, if you are too up front he may be freaked out. This requires a delicate approach like the one that SwingFox has suggested. Good luck sweetie
  19. Annoyed And Bitter
    Sweetie, you have GOT to apologize for being an ass. There is simply no getting around THAT. Furthermore I suggest you DO NOT voice your jealousy to her. This is a situation of you own making, and I think you know that. The best advice I can give you is to keep your distance for a while. Give yourself some time to get to 100% and deal with your feelings for her. You cannot be her friend as long as you are harbouring feelings that go BEYOND a simple crush. Maybe the "crush" part will go away, maybe it won't. In the long run it is MY opinion that you take a few LARGE steps back and get your sh*t together before you attempt a friendship. A friendship can exist with a "crush" it CANNOT exist with an infatuation, especially an unhealthy one. Just my humble opinion....
  20. Annoyed And Bitter
    Sometimes people make me really mad, and while I realize it doesn't matter in the long run, I felt the need to tell you that her having a child DOES NOT mean that you should completely discount her, despite the response from Bazooka... Follow your heart, love...
  21. Annoyed And Bitter
    Tell her how you feel... It is the only way for you and this girl to figure out what is there between the two of you. If this girl is the ONLY one you are shy with and "the best" of all the girls, there is bound to be something very special there. Go for it, and GOOD LUCK
  22. Annoyed And Bitter
    Nigel, By the way... You realize of course that no matter HOW she replies that this man will always be in her life because of the child, right?
  23. Annoyed And Bitter
    Nigel, It seems that I cannot avoid throwing my opinion in here. I think your best course of action is to tell her that you are starting to have feelings for her. Stress that you are not trying to break up her relationship with her fiance (even if you ARE). But that you just could not go another second without telling her how you feel. Whether she is interested or not, I am sure she will let you know. The question here is CAN YOU HANDLE HER ANSWER WHATEVER THAT ANSWER MAY BE? Good luck to you
  24. Annoyed And Bitter
    Okay, I am going to give you the only advice that will do any good here... You have got to figure out what is important to you. I have no doubt that you love your kids, but you are treating them like they are not important to you anymore. Despite anyhting else going on in your life you have the obligation to treat them with love and respect, and to take care of them physically, emotionally, and mentally. If a computer and a dysfunctional relationship are interfering with your childrens LIVES and HEALTH there are some serious priority issues here. The issue with your husband isn't all that big a deal. If the two of you are happy this way, whatever. I think it is sad that you are using him so horribly, but if that is what the two of you are comfortable with, fine. The real issue here is your kids and they deserve better, and YOU KNOW IT!!!
  25. Annoyed And Bitter
    Sweetie, I think you made a mistake in telling her children anything. Despite the fact that you meant well, it wasn't your place to tell them anything. It was and is an adult situation that probably should have been discussed with your sister first, and with the children only with her consent. I understand why you would be concerned. I would be too, honestly. Your sister (and probably her husband too) needs help. There are obviously some issues she has that should be addressed. But for the time being you cannot offer her that help, for obvious reasons. My best advice to you would be to give her a little more time, without bombarding her with emails, cards, and phone calls. When you DO contact her, apologize for crossing the line with her kids. The only way out of this is to recognize and acknowledge your mistake.... Good luck
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