Allie.

hey cuties. long story short: i dumped a dude last sunday and he's been weird since then...you know, i could possibly like him again if he stopped his clingyness but of course i didn't tell him that cuz i don't wanna lead him on, just told him i didn't like him.. Breaking Up: He had a strange "in-denial" reaction where he begged to be friends so i said yeah, and then asked me to have lunch with him the next day and i said "no, i'll tell you when we can be friends again and hang out..."etc. Current situation: i thought i'd start to like him again because his clingyness [but of course i didn't tell him that] was disappearing but i came home a few days back and a message awaits me, cussing me out, calling me a "pretty face without a heart..." & hypocritical and a liar and a 'tard...for some stupid things i never did. [i think he was getting his anger out] hahaha...but yess...he told me he wanted me out of his life so i told him, "i trust your decision." and a few days have past and a huuuge apology comes from him about how sorry he is and how he promises he'll be friends with me till i'm ready to go out..etc...and more stuff.... The question is...to forgive or not forgive? hmm? if so, should i let him talk to me in person or what...gimmi some advice sillies... i swear, i need more advice than anyone else in this place. goodness. [insert self-esteem level dropping below zero here] always. Allie.

inexperienced men are adorable. i like being the "aggressive" one perse.

cliche but true--be yourself. "Do what you want and say what you feel because the ppl that matter won't mind and the people that mind don't matter." But if she doesn't show much interest, just know that there's been psychological surveys that show that women don't start choosing the right mates till they are well beyond college years [=

tell him to eff off. he's being a complete jerk to you...if i were you, and he said that to me, i would pretty much never talk to him again...i mean, he hasn't even met you...and he's asking for phone sex...right...major sign right there that he just needs someone up his end.

Thanks. I think I'll do that. always, allie.

Thanks guys. But I have a question: Should I avoid friendship by ignoring him or by informing him first, that i don't want to be friends...and explain why?

The Weirdest Break-Up in the World? well, you guys...i talked to him...i think i was a bit harsh at first because he got really weird but then i think i got too easy. I told him what Annie said and he started laughing and acting like it was all funny..so i thought it wasn't a big deal...then he started freaking out and like screaming at me about how and WHY i lost feelings for him...so i told him the truth about how i really did like him but i lost feelings for him because he was too "clingy" sometimes... He got all apologetic and kept telling me how much he liked me..etc..etc..etc and I really begun to feel awful but i guess it would be worse if i stuck with him and didn't like him so i started emphasizing the fact that i didn't like him and he was in denial or something because he was all like: "i think you like me because you really liked me and i miss you, and i like you, and i think you still like me but you're confused..." and i told him: "I'm 101% positive I don't like you. Then, this is the weird part fellas...he starts begging me for friendship...and I'm telling him, "okay. yeah sure" and before we hung up, he kept reminding me of how much he liked me and asked me if i liked him, and i told him, "no. i'm SURE i don't like you right now" and then, he asks me if he could come pick me up for LUNCH TOMORROW?! and I said, "no...we're not together like that anymore"...He said: "oh i know but just as friends..." So i got confused and I didn't know what to say cuz i had promised him that i would be friends with him but i also know how bad it feels to be with an ex after they break up with you...so I just said: "I'LL tell you when I'm ready to hang out with you again..." So in the end, I am having to take the role of the [dumpee] because i wanna save him some pain...but...like....its strange...cuz normally, people hang up and go cry or kick something or write...to get their anger out...his rxn was completely opposite.. WHY do you guys think that he was reacting like that? and do you think that I did the right thing? If not, what WAS the right thing to do?

mm. i just broke up with my bf today because i lost "feelings"...mine was because... he was too much of a Clingy guy.

don't take him seriously.... damn horomones.

giggle. Closure, i don't think you read my post all the wayy. but 'tis okay. &

Thanks ya'll! Advice much appreciated [=

r.i.p leah. lots of love and care to you and everyone that cares for you right now. hang in darlings. the pain shall pass. she will always be remembered for the joy she brought to each and everyone of her friends and family..

hey smarties. i have to break up with my boyfriend tonight actually in a couple of hours...so I need the best, least-hurtful way to do it... Some background... -I don't take the way of breaking up via email...the virutal world is confusing..its either the cell or the hardcore face-to-face... - he had liked me for 3 years but i never liked him and i was pretty mean to him in the past few years because he got SOOOOO clingy and bothersome and there was no other way to give him the "hint" because i tried all the other things......so in the past year, he hated me...but then this year, i started liking him and he still liked me...[this is why i have to be REALLY nice...cuz i don't want to sound like a witch and I really really don't want to hurt him.] -We were only dating for a few weeks...so it wasn't big...he took it too seriously and was always clingy and I just can't handle that right now with so many things going on and he just repelled me away with his insecurity and his paranoia about: "do you like someone else?" "do you like me?" "are you sure?" "do i make you happy?" "am i annoying?" "should i get you flowers?"...etc. I'm sure some girls like that, but he was wayy too nice for me. -I want us to be friends, when its okay with him. - I'm not really 'hurting' at all because it wasn't for that long and my feelings just got lost because of his interrogating and treating me like a child... - I know him and i know he'll be hurt a lot and i just want it to be in the nicest way possible because I may not like him, but i still care for him. WHAT should I do, or rather, say lassies and gents? a.l.w.a.y.s. Allie

so you know...i like this guy and he likes me. the prob is that i don't feel any physical attraction for him. Like when he touches me, I just kinda move away because its weird. I can't even imagine only making out with him! But I love his personality. Its cute. So I decided to tell him that i like him but i need things to go really slowly and he was willing.... and now he's just getting sort of annoying...with the 3000 emails and the 4000 text messages right after i talk to him and trying to wedge into my group of friends when we hang at work. I mean, he doesn't fit in w/ my friends. My best-friend and I are crazy and have about 1000x infinite inside-jokes like normal best-friends...so he doesn't get them so we want to be nice so we don 't say that type of stuff. Thus a) it makes things awkward cuz we don't know what to talk about. b) it makes me have less fun with my best-friend. I mean, I appreciate an email like once in 3 days or something or a text message once in a week. BUT EVERYDAY is enough. AND...I need him to stop touching me. ITS WEIRD! How should I tell this guy nicely...all of the things above? any other solutions?

race is craze. i don't care about race. acceptance is seeing with your heart, not thru your eyes.

Hey B... well, i just realized that i have to see you everyday now because we're working at the same place...along with your girlfriend who is a great friend of mine. It pretty much blows. I was definitely very scared when I realized that I had to see you but when I did, things weren't that bad at all. It was nice and friendly and I got the feelin that I was pretty much over you. Of course, being me, and wacked up in the head, I'm not the type of girl who begs to break NC...I beg to NOT break NC...so I usually try to stay out of you and your girlfriend's general direction because I don't want to see uneccesary public displays of affection but you know...sometimes, I can't ignore them because you're right there in front of my face. I was very happy with the way that things were going...I noticed that a lot of my pals work at the same place and that was good but then I saw you...and you completely ignored me but I made the bigger move and said "hey" and gave you a hug...you seemed to react fine to it and after that, we became acquaintances....its nice... Then a few days back, you started becoming very harsh towards me...in a joking manner of course...but i could tell there was a bit of coldness in your attitude towards me...i don't know why you're saying things like "allie, you corrupt everyone you meet" and "ugh, you're ugly.." etc. etc. you don't ever say that...and whenever I crack a joke around other people, you always used to laugh but you never do anymore. I think i'm starting to dislike you. You're not acting normally around me even though you act completely normal around other people.... [unfinished...will be completed when i have more time...]

your welcome kita. i'm glad i can do that [=

uh. please get all over my neck and i'll fall in love.

wow. mm..if good sex is something youre willing to sacrifice then sure, why not? but if its not, then....you've got some thinking to do.

i'm a proud MALE and my name is ALLIE and i look like a GIRL. haha. okay. i'm lame. anyway, i'm comfortable with sex when i know thats not what the relationship is based on and that the relationship would continue without a problem if sex wasn't present. its like catch-22

hey ren.... don't put yourself down like that. you're a beautiful woman. both inside out. and you're real. not like those phony barbie doll girls with plastic hair and liposuction and breast implants and god knows what else they have implanted in their little plastic bodies. i know what you mean, i was like you but i've changed around...i used to get all the jerky guys in town, they all, in the end, wanted sex. either way, what helped me was staying off the dating line for a bit and actually befriending guys...getting to know them and learning about them and just little facts about them...and i started going out with my male best-friend, and that ended badly because he was stuck up on his christianity beliefs and couldn't stand to date someone who's learning about religions and then making a decision.... As for the approaching deal, not a lot of guys seem to approach me either...maybe they feel intimidated...i don't know. i don't think you scare guys off. I think that anyone who's not willing to give you a chance without knowing you isn't worth crap. Like the prophetic dr. suess says, "do what you want and say what you feel because the people that matter don't mind and the people that mind don't matter." i think guys who're not interested in giving you a chance, shows that you haven't met the right guy yet... If i were you, i would definitely try the prolonged friendship deal. mmm. MUCH love from a fellow woman. Allie.

good. baby steps.

seriously, scream. literally, scream. scream like you haven't screamd before. and while you're at it, throw some sticks at someone. shout, twist, scream, kick, cry... LET IT OUT.

aww you're a sweet boy [=

yeah, i definitely agree with superstar. once you hit the jackpot of true love, you're not going anywhere..haha, so just try to become friends with the women you date first.