RayKay
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Everything posted by RayKay
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If you had clothes on, you are almost definitely okay. However, you should start taking your pill properly - if you HAD had sex today, you missing so many times last month may have meant you are not protected as the pill could be ineffective. If you have a hard time remembering it after trying to take it at a regular time (such as when brushing teeth in morning/night) you might want to look at the patch or another option. Even if you are not having sex yet, it is a good practice to get into in terms of taking your pill regularly!
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Ah, well, he has been with him for a while. And I know someone else who was with someone for about 4 years, though they recently broke up. And, well, up here in some provinces it has been legal for a while for gay couples to marry and they have been - that is pretty long term to me! I think the first couple had been together a few decades!
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Well, my brother is pretty darn happy with his boyfriend, and they are a great couple. The thing is, from talking to both him and other gay friends, that you have many of the same actual relationship/communication problems whether you are gay or straight - so not sure entirely where your question is coming from...straight people are just as likely to flit around relationships as gay people are.
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Hi jamie. Women have all SORTS of symptoms when they get pregnant - on top of the more known nausea, headaches, sore breasts, etc. Hot flashes can occur, as well as heat rashes for some women (small bumps on face/neck/chest area). Are you late? Best thing to do is wait until you are late and test. Also, if your period is a bit more unusual than the normal one (some women have implantation bleeding, or still continue to have "periods" months into their pregnancy) or if you still have symptoms and get more symptoms. Most women show up on urine tests at two weeks (first missed period), but some don't show up for a while longer, so test every couple days after that point if period still has not come. Or go get a blood test as they are more sensitive. If the breast pain continues, go see doctor if you are still getting negatives though. GOOD LUCK WHATEVER YOU ARE WANTING!
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Well....a fetus can NOT develop in the vagina - they can attach in the fallopian tube (eptopic pregnancy) or she could have endiometrosis which is painful especially during sex. The vagina is hostile enough to sperm, never mind to an embryo/egg trying to attach somewhere, it would just wash out with her natural fluids. If she is about 10 days from her period, she would of ovulated around 4 days ago (assuming she is really regular). If you had sex a week ago it IS possible that she could get pregnant from that as sperm can live a few days in the women. However, at 4 days past ovulation, it is unlikely she would be having symptoms like that - it usually takes a few days to weeks more to have any signs. The cramping COULD be ovulatory cramping (which happens to some women). If she misses her period, take a test, than another a couple days later. And....always wear a condom - even "just for a second" can lead to a life changing event.
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I don't have any advice for you, but your last two paragraphs are just something I will NEVER understand - similar to my own ex in a way - he wants to be with me in the future/long term, breaking up with me was the hardest thing he has ever done, he still wants me in his life, still loves me....but "had to break it off" because he "thought about me too much/felt too responsible to me and the relationship" and was not ready for that. He does not want anyone else, has not even had interest in anyone else...still contacts me, but yet...for whatever reason "can't" do it right now (meaning being in a relationship with me). He too felt that if he did not break it off "now", it would not work out "later" due to his "issues/reasons" and be worse and irrepairable later on, and this way he feels that there are better chances for us long term, then there would be if we stayed together straight through (huh?). Read those last two paragraphs over and over, and see if they make that much sense to even YOU! Because they don't make sense to me...either coming from you, OR from my ex. Her trying to control the situation is not as cool - but a normal reaction at her age I think. Let her know that those things push you away, even though you want to be friends with her - it might have her think twice before doing stuff like that. tell her making you feel guilty is just making you want to get away from her more and more, but you do care for her. f she keeps doing it, tell her you think it is better you two don't talk for at least a couple months and then come back as friends. Good luck!
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As I understand it, Mercury was in retrograde there for a good while, which seems to be the bringer of doom when it comes to relationships. I think things are supposed to be picking back up though again. Not sure how much people believe in that sort of thing, but sometimes it can be eery how spot on astrology is!
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Has anyone been sucessful being friends to get back together
RayKay replied to Nap-Man's topic in Getting Back Together
The reason is that in a letter (or talk), you are showing her she still has control of your emotions. If you through your behaviour can alternate interest with disinterest - ie send mixed messages - she will not know whether she has control anymore or not, or have any idea what you are thinking or doing. Don't pull back forever, you have to rotate the pulling with the pushing to show you care, then pull back to get her thinking. Passion is developed through a mix of hope and doubt - you have to figure out the right way to do that/balance them. -
The MAP SHOULD be fairly effective within 24 hours (since you should take it maximum within 72) so you might just have messed up your monthly cycle and hence the delay in your period. Not an uncommon thing to happen. I imagine you are probably all right, you might just not get a period this month or it could just be very late. Test again in a couple days, but if you are still testing negative, I imagine you are fine. You can also go get the blood test to ease your nerves.
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There really aren't that many fish in the sea.....
RayKay replied to xxbatmanxx's topic in Relationship Advice
I always say in response to people who say that line (I HATE that line, I feel it undermines your feelings, and "true love" as well) something along the line of the following: "That may be so, but there is only one (or there are very few) right now I am wanting to share my fishbowl WITH" -
Has anyone been sucessful being friends to get back together
RayKay replied to Nap-Man's topic in Getting Back Together
No problem Nap-Man - those stories are what keep me going sometimes! I think, that backing off might be good, but I would not tell her to do anything or to do it - I mean it depends on your ex, but it might not be your best approach. Just, be not so quick to answer/return her calls. Be aloof and independent, but still give her some emotional fulfillment, then back off. As you know, if you push, she will run, but if you pull back...she will chase. You just have to learn when to turn it on and off And, be patient! -
There is a chance, and that you have not had enough hormones build up yet. Wait a couple more days and test again, or go to doctor/clinic and get a blood test (more sensitive). There are some women who don't show up pregnant in tests until 1 month or more into their pregnancies. Have you had any other symptoms?
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No problem lynn, glad to help! Could even be the infection that threw things off...BUT, one of the symptoms of pregnancy can be a higher rate of infections (ear, yeast, throat, etc), so maybe it could be implantation, who knows! My fingers are crossed that it is good news for you, whichever way you want it to go. Please let me know in a couple weeks how things turned out for you!
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Hi lynn. Now, it IS possible that one can ovulate more than once per cycle even on occasion, and it IS possible that somehow you had an egg in your fallopian tube while on your period that got fertilized though pretty rare. But, not totally unconceivable (pun not originally intended!) as a woman's body can be pretty whacky sometimes. Also it could of been ovulatory bleeding itself (some women get this, and those that do not always get it EVERY month, or even ever again after one incident!). If it was, it is possible you may have conceived. Or, it could be implantation bleeding as you thought maybe, and your levels are not high enough yet to test positive. If you did conceive then, you would need to wait two weeks until you had enough hormones to test positive. In another week you could also go to doctor and get a blood test - these detect lower hormone levels. It is still pretty early on, so you might not have any other symptoms yet, but watch for them. Sometimes women just have a sudden irregular period. Are you on the pill or anything? Whatever you are hoping for, I hope it works out for you!
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It is hard to say if he is pissed off as you did not trust him, crossed some "boundary" or because he was trying to build something more with her and you now "know all about it" so he can't have his cake and eat it too! I think you two really DO have to talk, but hopefully you can both do it calmy and objectively. I do hope for all the best with you, be open to his explanations and don't be judgemental off the bat, but also listen to the voice in you. Best of luck.
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Please!! Need help ASAP!! Deciding to Moving In Together!!
RayKay replied to cmirken's topic in Relationship Advice
Hmm, depends. Personally, I have always felt it important that someone live on their own first - I have seen a few couples where one or both move straight out from home in together, and it does not work well as neither knows what they are really taking on. And sometimes, the partner that has not lived on their own might regret it and want to...but, it also really depends on the individual involved. I think when you talk, you can tell him your concerns and see what happens from there. Even if he lives on his own for a year, and learns about the responsibility that comes with it, it could be good - and since you know you want to be together in the future, you have all the time in the world! 7 months is really soon, and living together is a huge step for most people, but as I said, it really really depends on your individual personalities. But I do think it is good you are looking at it realistically as well, and concerned about him learning that individual responsibility. Good luck! -
Ugh. I really really REALLY know where you are coming from there. That is exactly how I feel so many times over. Exactly. You just put all my own little frustrations, fears, sadness into the right words.
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Has anyone been sucessful being friends to get back together
RayKay replied to Nap-Man's topic in Getting Back Together
I know of three couples where they remained friends/in contact during their breakups and all got back together. In each, they had been together 1-2 years, the guy ended it due to "not being IN love", not "sure", not ready for commitment, wanting to be single and free. They were apart for 2 months-1.5 years. They had some contact through the time apart, the guys realized they were stupid for letting the girl go (grass not so green!) and started dating again and got back together. All have remained together and are in more committed forms (including married). -
Oooh, I am in the 'Peg too! How are you enjoying this early winter It sounds like at least from her side, that she does not see it as anything more than an occasional email or two - and that is a possible scenario. But, as you said before, there is some questionable email content which might be more bothersome as it indicates while she may be over him, he might not be over her entirely. But, you also need to have a level of trust, or this is going to eat away at you. Has he ever done anything to break your trust before? Perhaps he is just naturally a flirty person - but does not mean he will go anywhere with that...I don't know, but you have to listen to your own gut about things.
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Yes. Read around the forums. People do just up and leave, for sometimes very minor reasons. Even my own father left my mother after being married for 7 years, 2 children, and one 2 months away from being born. Why? He decided he was not ready for commitment. Of course, he re-married a year later and had another child
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If his second wife left because of abuse, I find it hard to imagine the child was left with him. I think it is very believable she up and left...reading the posts around here, it is pretty common for women OR men to have these sudden changes of heart
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The Rules-I think it works to make a man commit!
RayKay replied to Luciana's topic in Relationship Advice
From the way you described it (and what little I know of the rules) that does not sound like well, a happy relationship. Maybe if I wanted a husband for the sake of getting married yes, but as another poster mentioned - not if I want a life time partner. What is going to happen when they are married and living together? Is she still going to step aside all the time? I don't know - I agree with going through push/pull scenarios to keep the interest high, but sounds like she "gave" too much and thereforeeee is not getting a whole lot of fulfillment in return. I agree that sometimes our lives are busy and we can only see each other once a week or so, but hmmm...something sounds odd here. We are supposed to be two complete individuals coming together, and it sounds like she was not able to be complete or felt comfortable expressing herself around him or expressing her needs. -
As another poster mentioned, the morning after pill within 72 hours is an option. Now, did you use condomn at all? Or did it slip off? How long ago was her last period? Please keep in mind that while women USUALLY ovulate midcycle - this can vary. Some women even ovulate more than once per cycle! But, if it was right after/before, you might have better odds, but keep in mind also sperm can live 3-5 days (or sometimes more) inside her body - meaning they might be waiting at ovulation!
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I guess my taboo would be hate/slander against other groups of people for whatever reason, or even individuals. Not your "idea" of taboo I guess, since I am pretty open to talking about anything and everything, but when people slander groups of people (for race, sexual orientation, whatever) that is a big no-no.
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When you have an orgasm, trust me, you WILL know. As for the electric toothbrush - I think that might be way too much friction/fast for enjoyment, you might just go numb! Try either a real vibrator...or, a massager - like a neck massager/wand massager, etc which you can buy in regular stores. Or, go the old fashioned way and use your own hands