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Tinkerbell

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Everything posted by Tinkerbell

  1. Tinkerbell
    If you don't want to hurt him anymore then you must be honest with him at once. Tell him that you care about him deeply but not in the romantic way. Do not put it off any longer, your dishonesty will just cut him deeper.
  2. Tinkerbell
    Since she is contemplating suicide this is a very serious manner. Although her family is "messed up", they would be your best bet. Arrange to have a talk with them in private and tell them just how concerned you are about your friend. Hopefully, they will seek the proper help she needs...(Whether it be a therapist or hospitlisation) Your friend may be angry with you at first, but she'll thank you in the end. If her family isn't willing to help her you should contact someone at your school, whether it be the guidance cousellor or the principal, one of them is bound to know what to do to help her.
  3. Tinkerbell
    First of all, don't jump to conclusions. Just because he seems preoccupied does not mean he isn't as devoted as you are. I think one of the reasons he may be acting squirmish about getting married, moving in together, etc is because he realises that if school pushes him farther away it wouldn't be possible...It could be that he doesn't wanna get your hopes up high because it'll only hurt the both of you more in the end. I think you should continue being yourself; if you feel like talking about a certain thing, whether you think he'll be nonchalant or not, just DO IT. If he doesn't love you for you he isn't worth it. I know you guys are far away from each other, but the next time you get to see each other sit down and have a talk about where your relationship is going (Guys seem to hate these, but girls need them.) Hopefully, you guys will be able to come to a conclusion. Good luck!
  4. Tinkerbell
    Ouch...sounds like this girl really hurt you. What was the reason that she "left you hanging?" Did she meet someone else, or was it just a spur of the moment decision? You say that you guys weren't compatible, so I don't think you should call her. I believe the reason that you miss her so much and are debating calling her is because you don't want to be alone. The idea frightens you so much you'd rather be with someone who you never got along with that well in the first place. Surround yourself with friends to help yourself through this tough time and you'll be fine.
  5. Tinkerbell
    "Absense does to love what wind does to fire - It extinguishes the small and inflames the great" Brilliant words (I happen to forget the author tho), and you should take them into consideration. Although long distance relationships are rather tough, you have nothing to worry about if your love for each other is real, especially since it's only 3 months. Write each other a lot of letters (with a spritz of your cologne on them, of course, so she won't forget how her darling smells and take plenty of pictures of yourself doing every day things so she can feel like she's right there by your side. Ask her to do the same. Try to talk at least once a week on the phone (Although hearing her voice may be painful, it will also be reassuring) and try to busy yourself during those few months to keep from getting down. Find yourself a new hobby! Before you know it, she'll be back. Sincerely, Cherry
  6. Tinkerbell
    Hello. Sounds like you've got quite the complicated problem on your hands. I believe that the reason your ex is acting this way is because she wishes to "get you back." You mentioned that when the two of you were going out you had acted like quite the moron, and this probably was rather painful for her. Now you suddenly want to come back into her life and she's probably rather skeptical. How is she to know for sure that you have changed? She can't! For this reason, she is attempting to send you running because she doesn't wanna end up hurt; doesn't want to have her past re-written. So now the next question is what can you do? I suggest that you have a talk with her (in person of course, no more run-on message on her answering machine) and explain to her the way you feel. Ask her if she can find the kindness in her heart to give you another chance. Tell her that you love her and you realise what an idiot you were in the past; make it clear you'll do everything in your power to keep from hurting her. And then live up to your promises if she agrees. If she doesn't, there's nothing that you can do but leave her alone: You caused her too much pain and she doesn't want to have to go through that again. Sincerely, Cherry
  7. Tinkerbell
    How long have the two of you been together? If your relationship is only a few months old I can see why she's freaked out. Have you talked about marriage before? Are the two of you engaged? If the answer to either of those questions is no, then I don't think you guys should share a bank account. Besides, are you sure that she's trust-worthy? I hope you considered that. However, if the two of you are already engaged and she doesn't want to share an account, consider the fact that she may be getting cold-feet. Marriage is the ultimate commitment, and she just may not be used to the idea yet. Sincerely, Cherry
  8. Tinkerbell
    I strongly doubt that it'll be a match in heaven, but it definitely could be a good thing depending on what you do with. I suggest that the two of you talk about it, and when you're both ready for it attempt to get over your commitment phobias. It may seem like the only way to fly right now, but trust me, you're better off without it. You definitely shouldn't expect a miraculous recovery because it's going to take time. Try and think of when your first noticed you had become a commitmenetphobe and what was going on in your life at that time. Get him to do the same. Hopefully, slowly but surely the two of you will learn that commitment can be a beautiful thing! Sincerely, Cherry
  9. Tinkerbell
    I'm very sorry that your relationship had to come to such a painful end, but from the sounds of it it was for the best. Chances are you might regret writing that email but just keep reminding yourself that there's no point in being in a relationship if the bad times are more frequent than the goods... Best of luck to you. Cherry
  10. Tinkerbell
    I look for a guy with a great personality (as I mentioned in another post). He's got to be funny, sweet, caring, sensitive, and someone I can have fun with! A guy with a good heart
  11. Tinkerbell
    I know you and your girlfriend have only been dating for 2 months, but do you consider yourself to be in love with her? It's obvious that you're more attached than she is, and to a certain degree there's nothing wrong with that. (Except for the fact that it's painful for you) Tell her how you feel and ask her if she could try and assert a little more importance to your relationship...Tell her that you'd be happy if you saw her just a little more often! If she cares about you she'll make an effort. And if she refuses to spend more time with you, than perhaps you should consider breaking up. For a relationship to work, you both need to be on the same page, and by the sound of it you guys are drifting to be chapters apart. Sincerely, Cherry
  12. Tinkerbell
    Personally, I do not judge people by their appearances, but from what I gather a lot of people do. I'm not sure if there is one particular physical thing that a woman would find ugly on a man...I happen to dislike tattoos and piercings, so that's about my one thing. Then again, if the guy was missing his ears and had only 2 teeth, I strongly doubt he'd be seen as a "stud". But this guy could have an amazing personality and that's why we should all take the time to get to know one another, despite how attractive that person seems. In my opinion, "ugly" would be a terrible personality...A cocky, rude, insensitive, boring guy! No matter how "hot" he was, there's no way I'd go out with him...See where I'm going with this? Stop focusing on the phsyical aspect of a person, because in the end it doesn't matter. When you're 80 years old and as wrinkled as a prune, you'll appreciate it if your husband/wife can still make you smile. Sincerely, Cherry \
  13. Tinkerbell
    Communication sounds like the only solution. Just ask this guy what's up! Tell him how you don't appreciate him stealing your jokes and that eventually everyone will realise what he's doing and won't find him the least bit funny anymore. Ask him why he finds the need to attempt to steal your girl if he has a girlfriend of his own...There's no need to whine about it to your girl tho, she'll probably just think you're being a big baby about it. Besides, an insecure guy usually isn't a turn on. Sincerely, Cherry
  14. Tinkerbell
    Woa, I only understood about half of that (you might want to work a bit more on your writing skills) but it sounds to me like this girl has got serious issues. If she was interested in you I see no reason for her to act this way so you should probably just let her go. Cherry
  15. Tinkerbell
    Perhaps you've come on a little too strong and she's feeling a little scared, which would explain her signing off on msn the second you log in. Give her some space. If she likes you, your absense will definitely affect her and she'll come to you, and when she does, don't overreact and start claiming your love for her, because that'll push her even farther away. Maybe she's coming out of a bad relationship and she's scared of being hurt again...Who knows! What you need to do is stop being the least bit clingy, and wait for her to initiate things. If she doesn't, it's probably because she's not interested. Sincerely, Cherry
  16. Tinkerbell
    I don't think you should wait for him to come to you, but rather confront him about it. Chances are he doesn't wanna admit that he has a problem, thereforeee he'd be uncomfortable about coming out and saying it because he has too much pride. Besides, if he does have it, he'll need professional help, and the sooner he gets it the better. If you care about this guy, make sure to tell him you'll stick with him throughout the ordeal..Encouragement can help a lot. I don't have any personal experiences, but from what I gather therapy can work miracles. Good luck! Sincerely, Cherry
  17. Tinkerbell
    Girl friends can be tricky...When my boyfriend and I started going out, one of my close friends threatened to kill him too. The girl's probably just really overprotective and she doesn't wanna see her friend hurt. Perhaps she may also be scared of losing her: When relationships are first beginning, people tend to put so much time into them that they forget the others that matter. Why don't you just talk to your heart's desire about it and see what she thinks? Her friend could also be the jealous type who wants to hurt you since she doesn't have a boyfriend of her own...I don't know the details, so I can't say much. As for the flirtacious friend, if it's bothering you, talk to her about it. Make it clear that you're not interested in her, but her friend, and you'd appreciate it if she'd stop with the "kidding around" in such a way because it makes you uncomfortable. If she still doesn't quit it, once again I think you should talk to your love interest. These are her good friends after all, she's the one who knows them the best so she could probably guess what's going on in their heads. Sincerely, Cherry
  18. Tinkerbell
    Well, if you really love this guy and you've already considered marriage, you shouldn't let a 6th toe or whatever it is keep you away. When you think about it, a person's feet are covered the majority of the day. You'd really only have to deal with it when you guys are sleeping or having sex. If it bothers you so much you could always ask him to keep his socks on when you guys are getting intimidate. But after all, he is the same guy, and he's probably self-conscious about his minor deformity already, so I don't think you freaking out will help much. Give yourself some time to get used to it, and if you still can't bare it, try the sock idea. Sincerely, Cherry
  19. Tinkerbell
    Hmmm...Well if my cousin told me he was in love with me, I'd obviously be disturbed...She's blood-related, doesn't that turn you off at all? I strongly suggest that you keep your mouth shut and don't speak a word of it to her, you're just gonna freak the poor girl out! By the sounds of it you guys have a good friendship, so why would you wanna put that at stake? Are you sure you're really in love with her anyway, perhaps it's just admiration or attraction in a totally non-sexual way? If this isn't the case, maybe you should see professional help...Falling in love with your cousin is abnormal, and in my opinion, downright sick.
  20. Tinkerbell
    For starters, do not blame God for your problems. Now that that's been settled... We all go through tough times, it's to be expected. Nobody has the perfect life, and it's the rough times that make us stronger in the end...They allow us to see things differently, in a better way! Sometimes your vision is clear only after your eyes have been washed out with tears... God would not have given you life if he didn't want you to live it, so you should put suicide out of your mind. If you're not able to do that on your own, see a doctor who will perhaps suggest an anti-depressant to help you out for a little while.
  21. Tinkerbell
    The longer you wait to tell him how you really feel, the more hurt he's gonna be. It's time for you to tell him the truth; it's the least he deserves. Don't be harsh tho, let him down easy...If you still care about him, make sure you establish that right away, but also point out that you're ready to see other people. Chances are it's gonna be hard for you guys to be friends at first since he'll take the break-up badly (Cmon, what person doesn't when they're in love!) so give him some time. When he's ready to speak again, he'll come to you. But I have to remind you that you wouldn't be in this rut if you hadn't lied to him in the first place...What kind of person says I love you without meaning it? Anyway, good luck!
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